Authors: Bodie Thoene,Brock Thoene
Can you identify with Ellie? Are there certain things in your life that used to be black-and-white, and now they are gray? Why?
11. Have you ever felt like David, the “Tin Man, rattling around with no heart” (p. 41)? Or that you are simply doing a certain thing because you have nothing else to do with your life (see p. 42)?
When? What has changed, if anything, since that time?
Chapters 5–6
12. As Ellie walked down the street, she felt as if she was being pursued (see p. 46). Her fear turned to reality when she was attacked by two men. When have you been (or felt as if you could be) in physical danger? Describe the situation and what happened.
13. When Moshe saves Rachel from drowning, she isn’t happy to be alive at first (see p. 58). Moshe wonders if “death would have been more merciful.
What guilt and memories she must have to face
each day of her life!
” (p. 58).
Have you ever wondered if death would be more merciful—either for yourself or someone else? In what circumstances?
14. Rachel tucks her arm with the tattoo tightly against her body, hoping Moshe won’t see it (see p. 58–59). Her mark of shame and guilt and memories is physical—imprinted on her body. Each of us carries a “tattoo”—whether physical, spiritual, mental, or emotional. What is yours, and how did you get the mark?
15. “‘There is not enough of me left to hurt,’ she said flatly. ‘I brought my prison with me’” (Rachel, p. 59).
Do you carry around your own prison? In what area? How is staying behind the bars of this prison affecting your relationships and your thoughts of the future?
Chapters 7–9
16. Do you know anyone who has a “strange inner voice”— like Miriam seems to have (see p. 71)? If so, who? Do you trust that person’s perceptions and information? Why or why not?
17. Have you wondered, like Ellie, “And where is God in all this? If He was ever really here, surely He has given up” (p. 73)?
When?
Isaiah 40:31 says:
They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their
strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles.
What good have you seen as a result of your time of waiting?
18. “It is not the age of the parchment that men should study maybe, but the principles within. I will tell you the truth. This that I have read contains the promises of the Holy One of Israel, blessed be His name forever. That has not changed, though there has been no Israel for two thousand years… . Study the words, and the world will be a safer place to live. And smarter, eh?” (Rabbi Lebowitz, p.
87).
Do you agree with the rabbi? Why or why not?
19. “Without her he felt like a plane without a rudder—when before he could simply glide with the wind and never care what direction his life was taking. Now he cared.” (David Meyer about Ellie Warne, p. 89).
What person or cause gives you a “rudder”—a clear direction to go in life? Why?
Chapters 10–11
20. Until Ellie Warne had been in Palestine for six months, she had never experienced true fear. Then, suddenly, she was plunged in the middle of intrigue and death and she began to change: “‘Hang on, now,’ she warned. ‘It’s only a short hop to the ladder.
Just hang on.’ Her fear had given birth to a courage she had not been aware even existed in her” (p. 100).
When has fear given birth to courage in you? Tell the story. What did that moment change about your view of yourself?
21. Have you ever felt caught between two people, as Ellie is caught between loving Moshe and David (see p. 107)? What role did jealousy play in your trio?
PART II
Chapter 12
22. “Rabbi Lebowitz rose stiffly from his chair and surveyed the tiny apartment. ‘Too large it seems without you, Yacov,’ he muttered to no one. ‘Too empty. Too bleak’” (p. 113).
What person most brings joy and meaning to your life? In what ways? Have you told that person lately what he/she means to you?
Why or why not?
Sometimes it’s difficult to tell someone how much we love them, as it was for David to tell Ellie in chapter 13. Yet its important that those we love
hear
that we love them. If you haven’t told that special someone lately how much you love him or her, why not make today the day?
23. When have you wondered if you belong (see p. 114–115)?
24. After Ellie sees the tailor die, she realizes: “I’ve been living in some kind of a fairy tale… . Death is so—”
She stopped, unable to find the words.
“Real.”
“I saw it. I felt it follow me from rooftop to rooftop. It chased me.
It scared me. I’m not ready for it, and nobody who died down on that street was ready for it or expected it” (p. 119–120).
When did death become real to you? How did that event or moment change your perspective regarding eternity?
25. “I can’t believe that God or somebody has some kind of plan for my being here, either. I’ll make my own plans and learn to live with them; that’s all” (Ellie Warne, p. 120).
Do you believe that someone is running the universe? that God has a plan for you being on earth? Or do you believe, like Ellie, that you have to make your own plans? Explain your answer.
Chapters 13–14
26. If someone you knew well was to describe you, would they use the words
in focus
and
safe
—as Ellie did about Moshe (p. 122)?
Would they say you have
conviction
and
courage
(p. 122)? Why or why not? What words would you use to describe yourself?
27. Have you ever played “the jealousy game” as Ellie attempted to play with David to get at Moshe (see pp. 124–125)?
What was the result?
28. “As Ellie climbed beneath the cool sheets that night, she thought about Moshe, hiding from commitment behind his ancient writings, and David, trapped between the Milky Way and the twinkling lights of earth. Maybe she had been trapped, too. The reality of life simply did not measure up to her hopes and illusions.
Hot tears ran down her cheeks. She wished that somehow the peaceful lights of the heavens and the winking stars of Jerusalem could meld together as one heaven and earth. ‘But that’s not going to happen,’ she whispered into the darkness” (pp. 129–130).
Are there any ways in which you hide from commitment? ways you feel trapped or wish your life could change?
29. Ellie sees Uncle Howard as a man “full of peace and joy, so certain of his life” (p. 130). Because of him, she wonders, “God … can You see me?” (p. 130).
What person in your life is an “Uncle Howard”? Explain.
Chapter 15
30. “She is not yet sure what it is that has changed in her heart.
She does not know what has awakened, but I saw it in her eyes: She has become one of us.”
“Then you must let her be what God has made her. You must accept the risk or destroy what you feel in your heart for her. Listen to an old man, my young friend. There is always risk in love,
nu
?” (Moshe Sachar and David Ben-Gurion about Ellie Warne, p. 138).
Reflect on your closest relationships. Do you let others be what God intended them to be? Even if it means your relationship may change in some way? Why or why not?
31. As Ibrahim Hassan shows, evil begins one tiny step at a time: by allowing prejudice to color our judgment toward and treatment of others. But evil also occurs because of apathy. Moshe says, “Millions have been murdered beneath the apathetic gaze of men looking out for themselves” (p. 145).
Have you experienced the results of prejudice or apathy? If so, when? What signs of prejudice or apathy can you spot in yourself?
32. If you read the following two headlines in the newspaper, which would catch your attention and empathy more? Why?
“Man Shot Down at Chicago Airport”
“32 Killed in Jerusalem Bomb Blast”
Chapters 16–17
33. Rachel felt that she saved her own life in the death camps but sacrificed her soul in the bargain (see p. 149). Now she lives with the aftermath of her past daily (even though what happened to her was not her choice). Have you, in any way, sacrificed your soul (whether by choice or not)? What are the aftereffects in your life?
34. “If I am blind, it is God’s punishment,” Yacov claimed.
Ellie’s response? “God didn’t do this to you… . Men did” (p. 161).
Later she tells Moshe, “The people who did it don’t know God, don’t have the slightest idea who He is” (p. 201).
Do you agree? Why or why not? In what ways have you, like Yacov, “judged His heart” (p. 162) before you see the results?
35. “Moshe could not remember when he had stopped looking for the Messiah. Perhaps it had been the day the British officer had come with the news that his older brother, Eli, had been killed by the men under command of Ibrahim Hassan. ‘There must be another way for Jews to live in freedom,’ he had told his grief-stricken mother. ‘If God will not send the One to bear our burdens, then maybe we must learn to bear them ourselves and make a homeland that is a refuge for every child of Abraham.’ Thus the establishment of a nation of Israel had become Moshe’s dream, his messiah” (p. 164).
Have you ever become tired of waiting for God to do something? Or lost your belief in Him (if you believed in God in the first place)? If so, what has replaced that longing for or belief in God? What has become your dream, your messiah?
36. “We must celebrate in our hearts Christ’s birth. If others knew Him, then there would be no need of packing and talk of armies and killing” (Miriam, p. 168).
Do you believe Miriam’s words are true? Why or why not? If they are, how do you explain all the wrongs done throughout history in the name of Christ?
Chapters 18–19
37. “‘The ancients knew the prophet spoke of the Messiah.
How inconvenient truth can be at times! … Especially when for so long the one you thought to be your enemy is, in fact, your Savior.
This is truth, Moshe Sachar,’ he told himself. ‘So what will you do with the Messiah? the one they call Christ?’” (p. 180).
What do
you
believe to be the truth about the Messiah?
38. “There is more to truth than simply feeling. Just as there is more to love than feeling,” Moshe tells Ellie (p. 192). Have you found this to be true in your life? Why or why not? Give an example.
Chapters 20–21
39. “It is hardest for me when I think that God has allowed such suffering,” Moshe says (p. 201). Do you think God
allows
suffering? that He
causes
suffering? that He’s
incapable of stopping
suffering? Explain your thoughts.
40. Ellie admits that, until the time of the riot, she really didn’t know who God was. Now she says, “I think whoever God is, His heart must be breaking over the way we treat each other. And, Moshe, it makes me want to know Him and be like Him.”
Moshe responds, “I hope you find what you are looking for. I hope the same for myself—that somehow someone can heal the wounds we cannot see” (p. 201).
When you see suffering, does it make you want to get to know God— or run far from him? Why? Are you suffering from wounds that others cannot see? If so, in what areas?
41. “I am twenty-one now,” Rachel tells David, “and my dreams are all buried in the ashes of Auschwitz. At night I lie upon my bed and ask God where He has gone, why I was not allowed to die. He does not answer” (p. 216).
Have you ever felt the weight of God’s silence—or wished for death? In what circumstances?
(It’s fascinating to note that even though Rachel hasn’t received a direct answer from God, she has survived—in the most horrific of conditions. Isn’t that, in itself, an answer to her prayers?)
PART III
Chapter 22
42. “‘Oh, God,’ she cried aloud, ‘this can’t be what You want!
I’ve got some kind of war going on inside me! God, I don’t want to fight against You anymore… . I don’t know where to look for You.’
“Ellie felt so small and helpless, buried so far beneath the rubble that she could never dig herself out. ‘Help me!’ Tasting the warm salt of her tears, she sank onto a stool and rested her head on the counter. She closed her eyes… . ‘Find me’” (p. 226).
Have you ever asked God to find you? If so, when? If not, what stops you from at least investigating a relationship with God?
43. “I only wish I could be better. Wish I had done better and loved better. Wish I had never hurt anyone else.”
“But wishes are not hope. Hope is knowing the truth and acting on it”
(Ellie and Moshe, p. 228).
Do you recognize yourself in any of Ellie’s wishes? If so, which ones?
44. Read these statements by Moshe:
“In all our seeking and all our trying, there is no way that we can ever reach God, Ellie. The Scripture says that
all our
righteous acts are like filthy rags.
They don’t change the condition of our hearts or erase our past mistakes. Only God Himself can do that.” (pp. 228–229)
“All these years I have tried to follow the Law, and I have watched men of the Law live unhappy lives, frantically striving to please God. More rules. More laws. They are all broken.
And through it all, we looked for the Deliverer to save us from persecution and harm from Christian and Muslim nations. We look for the Messiah to deliver bodies while our souls are dying. All through the Scriptures He is mentioned. Then ancient commentaries speak of Him as the final sacrifice for all our sins and imperfections. They speak of His love and kindness and tell us that He alone is the one who can save us from the death that dwells in our hearts.” (p. 229)
In what ways have you tried to reach God? to fix your past mistakes? What has been the result?
45. “He died on the eve of Passover, nearly two thousand years ago. Like the lamb of sacrifice, He took my sins and covered them with His blood. He was perfect and without blemish, and He died in my place like the prophets said He would. Then He conquered death. Ellie, He came to life again and is living still, and He has made my heart alive in knowing Him. That is my hope. My belief in fact and truth” (Moshe, pp. 229–230).