The Geek and His Artist (24 page)

He cursed himself for being so slow and bounded out of bed and down the short hall. Simon was shifting on the bed, dreaming—no, having a nightmare—and obviously in pain. Jimmy knelt next to the bed and reached out to touch Simon’s arm.

“No! No, please,” Simon begged and Jimmy’s heart splintered.

“Baby,” Jimmy called softly, taking Simon’s hand.

Simon didn’t answer, didn’t wake up. His head shook, and one hand moved out like he was trying to ward someone off, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out who.

Jimmy gritted his teeth, burying his anger and tried, again, to wake Simon. “Baby, wake up. I’m here.”

“Jimmy….” Simon moaned, and the hand that had been trying to push someone away reached instead. “Jimmy?”

“That’s right, baby, I’m here,” he murmured, absurdly pleased that Simon recognized him even through the dream, taking the hand Simon reached out with.

“No! Don’t hurt him!” Simon nearly shouted. “No! Don’t touch him!” He subsided into whimpers that sounded something like “Don’t hurt Jimmy,” and Jimmy’s eyes widened.
He really was afraid The Bastard would hurt me!

“Shh, baby, shh, I’m here, I’m fine,” Jimmy murmured, leaning in and kissing Simon’s temple. “Come on, baby, wake up. It’s okay.”

Simon shuddered hard, then gasped and tried to sit up. Jimmy held him, a hand running over one arm. “Jimmy?” Simon’s tiny voice nearly broke Jimmy’s heart.

“It’s me, baby, I’m here.”

“Jimmy,” Simon nearly moaned and turned, falling into Jimmy, holding Jimmy close, burying his face in Jimmy’s chest.

Jimmy tightened his arms, running his hands over Simon’s back, the oversized T-shirt annoyingly in the way. Jimmy smoothed it down and went back to soothing Simon. He kept making nonsense sounds and holding Simon until the shakes subsided into shudders, and finally Simon lay still in Jimmy’s arms.

“I’m so sorry,” Simon whispered. If his face hadn’t been near Jimmy’s ear, Jimmy wouldn’t have heard him.

“Hey, there’s nothing to be sorry about!” Jimmy tilted Simon’s face up, smiling. “I’m glad I could be here, baby.” He kissed Simon softly.

Simon returned the kiss, then swallowed. “I didn’t mean to wake you,” he said, frowning.

“I was awake, actually. It’s all right.” Simon raised his eyebrows and Jimmy nodded. “Yup. Too much in my head.”

Simon made a face. “I can understand that. I probably wouldn’t have slept if not for the drugs.” He shrugged and shifted, then gasped.

“Shit!” Jimmy nearly jumped back but stopped himself in time, not wanting to jar Simon more. “Sorry!”

“It’s okay,” Simon said, grabbing Jimmy’s arm. He lowered himself carefully back to the bed.

“Let me get you a painkiller. Stay here.”

“Nah, think I’ll just take a walk down to South Side.”

Jimmy snorted, kissed Simon quickly, and ran into the bathroom. He shook one of the prescription pills into his hand and filled one of the tiny Dixie cups his mom kept in the bathroom. When he got back, he helped Simon sit up enough to take it and the water, then helped him back again.

“Shit.” Simon frowned.

“What’s wrong? What can I do?” Jimmy asked, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Simon scrunched his nose. “I, uh, gotta get up.”

Jimmy blinked at him for a second before understanding hit. “Oh!” He jumped up and leaned down to pick Simon up, but his boyfriend swatted him.

“I can walk that far,” he grumbled. “Just… hold me up.”

Jimmy considered arguing, but Simon still seemed a little embarrassed, probably from the dream, so Jimmy didn’t fight. He stood and gave Simon leverage, then wrapped his arm around Simon’s waist for support. They made their way very slowly into the bathroom, where Simon managed to balance against the wall by the toilet. When he insisted he could pee by himself—much to Jimmy’s embarrassment—Jimmy stepped out to wait. Simon called him softly a moment later. It took a little bit more effort and coordination to get Simon back in the bedroom, but finally he was lying down again.

When he was settled against the pillow once more, Jimmy noticed he looked pale. “Are you okay?”

Simon swallowed, then shook his head. “No.”

Jimmy sat next to Simon on the bed, taking Simon’s hand and kissing it. “What’s wrong, baby?”

Simon visibly struggled with himself, and Jimmy waited patiently as he waged some sort of inner war. “Could you… stay? For just a little while?” He’d whispered and Jimmy had to strain to hear, but he caught the words.

“Of course, baby.” Jimmy dropped a kiss on a temple, then tugged his mother’s office chair over to the side of Simon’s bed. He settled in, hand over the side holding Simon’s and angled to put his feet up on the side—far away from Simon. “How’s this?”

Simon gave him a wan smile and nodded. “Perfect. Thank you,” he murmured, squeezing Jimmy’s hand.

Jimmy leaned over and lifted it, dropping a kiss on it before they settled in again. “I’m happy to. Try to get some more sleep, baby. The medicine should kick in soon.”

Simon nodded, then closed his eyes. Jimmy knew Simon wasn’t going to fall asleep that easily, but he probably needed to hide just a little too, after the embarrassment from the nightmare and bathroom trip. Jimmy let him hide. He simply shifted to get a little more comfortable on the chair and watched Simon.

Once his boyfriend’s breathing evening out, Jimmy relaxed. He tried to pull his hand out of Simon’s, but Simon’s grip tightened, so Jimmy got as comfortable as possible and closed his own eyes, falling asleep almost immediately.

T
HE
FIRST
thing Jimmy registered was the footsteps. Right behind those, some shuffling worked its way into his subconscious. But what finally pulled him fully from sleep was the whispering.

Jimmy opened his eyes to see his entire family standing at the end of Simon’s bed. His mom and sister stood to one side, both of them with the most annoying “aww” look on their faces. Dirk and his dad stayed closer to the door, both with a cross between embarrassment—Jimmy thought at getting caught—and sympathy.

His face heated fast when all four of them grinned. “What?” he asked irritably.

The grins widened.

Jimmy groaned. “If you’re going to wake me up with this kind of humiliation, the least you could do is bring coffee,” he grumbled, trying to sit up. He still held Simon’s hand but couldn’t bring himself to let go. He shifted, twisting a little as he glared at his family, trying to work the kinks out of his stiff back. A six-and-a-half-foot frame did not lend itself well to sleeping in a chair.

His grumbling got him snickers, but his mother, bless her, pointed to two mugs on the edge of her desk.

He managed to reach out and snag a cup while still holding Simon’s hand. When no one moved, he scowled. “What?”

“It’s adorable,” his mother stated, rather matter-of-factly, still grinning.

Jimmy sighed and shook his head. “I’m happy we could entertain you. Thank you for the coffee.” He felt Simon’s hand tighten ever so slightly. “Now, do you think you could maybe not stand there and watch while I wake him up? He’s going to be embarrassed enough when he finds out you saw us like this.”

His grouching didn’t get the reaction he’d hoped for. Instead of chagrin, they all grinned wider.

Dirk and his dad were the first to wave and leave.

Amy chuckled. “Tell him I can’t wait to see him at breakfast!” She sent a pointed look at Simon and finally left.

“Really, Mom,” Jimmy nearly moaned when his mom stepped closer.

“Shh, it’s okay. Uh… did something happen last night?” she asked, eyes darting to Simon.

Jimmy hesitated, looking over at his boyfriend. “Nightmare” was all he said, but he knew it would be enough.

She nodded, looking pensive. “You know, maybe you two should just sleep in your bed. Listen, don’t say anything yet!” Jimmy swallowed the immediate complaint—he didn’t really want to think about his mom knowing he and Simon were in bed together, even
if
it was just to sleep. He nodded. “If he’s having nightmares and you can calm him down, you might help him not have them to begin with if you’re there.”

Jimmy raised his eyebrows, looking back down at Simon. “I never thought of that.”

She shrugged. “Maybe not. But it’s worth a try. And look, you’re an adult. Maybe your official birthday isn’t until next month, but you are, for all intents and purposes, an adult. So is Simon. Hell, I’d say he’s been a little adult for a long time.” She frowned at that, sending a look at Simon filled with sadness and affection. “You’re both old enough for us to not nose into every bit of your business. I know you’re responsible enough not to hurt him, with the leg.”

Jimmy frowned and thought about it. It would be a hell of a lot more comfortable for him, though he’d happily sleep in the chair again, if Simon needed it. “I’ll ask him. Oh, hey.” He looked up. “I meant to ask yesterday, but in the mess… I’d like to stay home a couple of days. I thought I’d be here tomorrow, maybe go in enough to get our assignments for a few days. Is that okay?”

His mom nodded. “Yeah, that’s fine. I’ll let the school know. I’ll make something up for you, and have Beth confirm with them that I am his guardian.” She tilted her head at Simon. “Just don’t mess up your grades.”

Jimmy shook his head. “No. Simon won’t want to either, I’m sure.”

She smiled. “That doesn’t surprise me.” She leaned in and kissed his forehead, then whispered, “And if you do decide to do something, don’t worry about noise. You’re far enough away that we won’t be able to hear you.” And with that piece of humiliation, she headed out.

“Your family is trying to kill me,” Simon muttered and Jimmy laughed.

“Nah, they just consider you part of it. So they feel safe treating you the same as they do Dirk—and Amy and me for that matter.”

Simon looked up at him, an unreadable expression on his face. “You really think so?”

Jimmy nodded. “Oh yeah. Mom thinks of you as her son, I’ve said this. She already loves you. I, uh, might have talked about you a little….” Simon raised his eyebrows. “Okay, a lot.” He laughed and Simon smiled.

“What on earth did you tell her? You must have lied a lot.”

Jimmy scowled. “If you weren’t injured, I’d… well, I wouldn’t smack you,” he mumbled, trying to cover it up. “Don’t talk like that.”

Simon looked up at him, big eyes a dark green in the dim room. “Thank you.”

Jimmy raised his eyebrows. “For threatening to hit someone who’s lived through abuse?”

Simon smiled again and shook his head. “For being upset that I’d talk about myself like that. For not wanting me to.”

“I love you,” Jimmy said simply. “I don’t want you to feel bad about yourself.”

“I really appreciate that. I love you too.”

Jimmy considered him for a long moment, the fears that had crept up on him at 2:00 a.m. resurfacing. But the expression on Simon’s face looked real enough, and some of the tension Jimmy had faded. “I’m glad. One-sided love sucks.”

Simon grinned. “Yeah, I spent three months with it. I’m aware.”

That made Jimmy beam. “Me too. No more, though, right?”

“Right,” Simon said, then struggled as he tried to sit up. Jimmy set his coffee on the floor and helped Simon shift until he was a bit more upright. “Thanks,” he said, looking pale and clammy.

“You need a painkiller,” Jimmy stated, frowning.

Simon sighed but nodded. “Yeah, I guess. I don’t want to.” He made a face. “I hate taking pills.”

Jimmy smiled. “I’m the same way. But you won’t get better if you have too much pain.”

“I know,” Simon grumbled. “But I don’t have to like it. Oh, is that for me?” he asked, looking hopeful as he pointed at the second mug on the desk.

Jimmy nodded, snagging it and handing it over. “It’s still hot.”

Simon sipped, eyes widening. “It’s sweet too!”

After picking his own cup up and sipping, Jimmy nodded. “Yup. Mom pays attention.”

“I think I’m in love,” Simon murmured, closing his eyes.

Jimmy laughed. “Don’t tell Dad that.”

Simon opened his eyes and grinned. “Well, I think he’s aware I’m more in love with you.”

“Good, I’d hate to try to compete with my mom. That’s just weird.”

Simon started laughing, and Jimmy had to take the coffee mug from him. “Sorry, shit, I think I’m a little silly from… everything.”

“I’d be surprised if you weren’t.” Jimmy shook his head, handing the cup back. Simon sipped at it for a moment, and Jimmy dropped his eyes. “So, uh, Mom made a suggestion earlier, and I told her I’d ask you. If you’re not comfortable with it or whatever, I understand, but I kinda think she might have a point, and if you’re okay with it, I’d like to—”

Simon put a hand on Jimmy’s arm. “I’d like to sleep next to you.”

Jimmy felt some of the heat that had started to crawl up his neck fade. “Yeah?”

Simon nodded. “Yeah. I think….” He cleared his throat and his cheeks colored. “I think it might help with the nightmares. After… after I laid back down last night and you held my hand… I haven’t slept that well in a really long time.”

Jimmy knew his grin was ridiculous. “I… that makes me really happy. I mean, not that you used to not sleep well, but that—”

Simon grinned. “I know, it’s okay. Uh….” He frowned. “Will Mrs. Andrews have a problem with that?”

Jimmy thought it through. “I don’t know? But we don’t have to tell her. We can keep this bed in here and just not tell her exactly where you sleep.”

“That… that works.” He nodded. “And… you really don’t mind? Sharing your bed?” Simon wouldn’t look at him, so Jimmy let go of his hand and tilted his chin up.

“I hope to be able to share a bed with you for a
really
long time. I see no reason not to start now.” Jimmy swallowed, his heart pounding because he knew exactly what that sounded like. He didn’t know when it had solidified in his head, and he worried again that he was pushing things too far too fast, but he was positive that at some point in the not-too-distant future, he would get down on one knee in front of Simon.

Because despite his fears, every time he thought it, it felt
right
.