The Green Knight (64 page)

Read The Green Knight Online

Authors: Iris Murdoch

‘No.'
‘It's yards long. Oh dear. Would you like some tea?'
‘No thanks.'
‘I suppose you've had some lunch?'
‘No, I mean yes.'
‘Sefton, come into the kitchen, you are over-tired, you are working too much. You
must
have some tea.'
Sefton followed her mother into the kitchen and sat down.
‘I hope those girls are all right. I think Connie is cross with us.'
‘Why?'
‘For involving her and Jeremy in that extraordinary evening with Peter Mir.'
‘I thought she was enjoying every moment of it.'
‘I do hope he'll get out soon. I think he does us good.'
‘By being religious – or giving us jewels?'
‘Fancy his giving Aleph that diamond necklace.'
‘He's a millionaire, he gives them to all the girls.'
‘Here is your tea. Would you like some cake or a biscuit?'
‘No, thanks.'
‘I'll try the clinic again tomorrow. Sorry, I feel terribly restless.'
‘Give Clement a ring.'
‘I don't think he's there. He – oh never mind.'
‘Well, Bellamy then, I suppose he's still with Emil.'
‘He talks so on the telephone.'
The telephone rang and Louise ran out. She returned. ‘It's Harvey, he wants you.'
Sefton went out, closing the door behind her. She could be heard making laconic answers. She returned.
‘I suppose he wants to know if Aleph is back.'
‘Yes. Louie, thanks for the tea, I think I'll go and get on with my work.'
‘Do stay with me a little longer, can't your work wait, stay here and relax. I think I'll call the Adwardens' London number again, or I suppose I could try Jeremy's office, I know that number is in the telephone directory.'
‘You could ring Cora for the Yorkshire number.'
‘I don't want to bother Cora.'
‘Oh don't
fret
so, Louie! Aleph will turn up soon, and she'll be cross if you've been fussing everyone else!'
‘I think I'll just try Connie again.'
Louise went into the hall and dialled the number. She heard Connie's voice.
‘Oh Connie, I'm so glad you're there, I've been trying to ring you.'
‘I just dashed to Paris for the exhibition, just got back, I'm
exhausted
! How are you?'
‘All right, I'm just thinking about Aleph and Rosemary.'
‘Yes, such a wonderful tour!'
‘Quite a long one.'
‘Rosemary always wants to see everything. She'll drive a hundred miles to see some crumbling castle, especially if Mary Queen of Scots or someone was imprisoned there!'
‘You relieve my mind – '
‘How's our recent host, Peter Mir, are they keeping him inside?'
‘For the present I think, he'll be out soon. So do you know when they'll be back?'
‘When who'll be back?'
‘Aleph and Rosemary.'
‘Well, Rosemary's back, or rather she isn't, she's in Paris, or she was, and Aleph's with you.'
‘No she isn't, she hasn't come, we haven't heard from her – '
‘Rosemary took her to your place before coming on to us.'
‘What
? No, she didn't, I've said, she hasn't come back, she isn't here – you say Rosemary's back from their tour – ?'
‘
Yes,
she came back a couple of days ago, she told us all their adventures!'
‘But Aleph isn't with you – '
‘No, I keep saying, Rosemary took her to your place, I've no idea where she is!'
‘Did you see her with Rosemary?'
‘No, of course I didn't, Rosemary had already delivered her to you!'
‘But she hasn't, she didn't, Aleph isn't here, she hasn't come back, we don't know where she is! Look, could I talk to Rosemary, have you got her number in Paris?'
‘Well, I'm afraid she's left by now, she said she was going on to Chartres, I don't know where she's staying – or whether she actually went to Chartres, she's so vague! She said she'd be back in England on Thursday or Friday – '
‘Connie,
please
could you tell Rosemary to ring me – and do please could you ring me if you hear anything?'
‘Are you worrying about Aleph?'
‘Yes!'
‘Well, you're more likely to hear something than I am – but what are you worrying about? She's probably gone on somewhere else with some friend. She is grown up, you know.'
‘Yes – of course – anyway – thanks, goodbye.'
Louise returned to the kitchen. Sefton said, ‘Well – ?'
‘Connie says Rosemary came back two days ago, and said she'd brought Aleph back here. Rosemary's somewhere in France now. Connie says Aleph has probably just gone on somewhere else with a friend.'
‘How could she – ? Louie,
please
– '
‘Aleph wouldn't do that. So it means something must have happened to her. Oh Sefton, what can have happened – she has had an accident, she has been attacked – '
‘We'd have heard. Look, do ring Clement again.'
Louise rang Clement's number, again no reply. She said, ‘Where's Moy?'
‘Upstairs, I'll get her.'
Moy could not offer any clues. No, she had heard nothing from Aleph, and Aleph hadn't said anything.
The doorbell rang. Moy ran to the door and admitted Harvey. Sitting in the kitchen, Harvey too was questioned, but could provide nothing but exclamations of distress. Moy went back upstairs. Louise was telephoning Emil's flat and speaking first to Emil and then to Bellamy.
Harvey and Sefton sitting side by side spoke in low voices. ‘How can you have written me such a letter! We have only just found each other!' ‘Where's Aleph, do you know?' ‘Of course I don't know! Are you mad?' ‘Harvey, I do mean it about leaving me alone, I've got to be alone. And now this awful thing about Aleph.' ‘You care about Aleph more than you care about me.' ‘Harvey, I want you to
think
about Aleph, to think about what she means to you – and to me. We can't just – ' ‘You want to sell me to Aleph, you want to make her a pretext for dropping me, you think it was all an illusion, you are causing me terrible pain.' ‘I'm in pain too, I want you to have some ordinary time with Aleph – ' ‘What can be ordinary now?' ‘I want you to be with her, she may simply be waiting for you, just wait and
think
, anyway we are far too young, we have been too hasty, I don't want us to do any more, God, don't you
understand
?' ‘No, I don't. Do you want me to propose to Aleph and if she turns me down, try you?' ‘This is a horrible conversation, I'm sorry, it's all my fault, I oughtn't to – do please just stay away, only
forgive me
and don't be angry with me, I
can't bear it
.' ‘Sefton, you are sending me to hell.' ‘Don't you care about Aleph?' ‘Look, I'm in love with you! Perhaps she's gone to Peter Mir. People can do mad things.'
Louise returned. ‘Bellamy and Emil can't help.'
Sefton said, ‘Harvey thinks she may have gone to Peter Mir, he seemed to be in love with her.'
‘He may have told her to go to some place,' said Harvey, ‘and he'd join her there. Of course he's a bit mad.'
‘He gave her a diamond necklace,' said Sefton.
‘
Did
he?' said Harvey.
‘Do you think I should telephone the clinic?' said Louise.
‘No,' said Sefton, ‘Harvey is talking nonsense.'
‘I don't think it's nonsense, I'm going to telephone them.' She went back into the hall. Moy had returned and was sitting on the stairs.
Sefton moved away from Harvey where they had been sitting shoulder to shoulder and where she had resisted his hand. She stood up. ‘How mad all this is. We are all mad now. It had to happen. Aleph has gone away to other friends, like Connie said, she's just fed up with living here and being watched all the time.'
Louise stood in the doorway. ‘They wouldn't tell me anything. They said they never discussed patients by telephone. Oh dear, what can we do, we must do something!'
Harvey said, ‘Perhaps she's with Clement. That seems likely, after all – '
‘After all what?' said Sefton.
‘Clement isn't there,' said Louise. ‘I'm going to call the police.'
‘Oh
no
, Louie!'
Sefton followed Louise into the hall and sat down beside Moy on the stairs. Moy was trembling. Sefton put an arm round her.
Louise rang the police who listened politely, said they had had no report of any relevant accident or assault, yes, they were noting the telephone number.
Harvey came out of the kitchen. Moy was now retreating up the stairs. Harvey said to Sefton in a low voice, ‘I'm going. Walk along the road with me. Please.' And to Louise, ‘I must be off now.'
‘Oh Harvey, won't you stay to supper? It is nearly supper-time, isn't it, I'm so confused – '
‘I'm so sorry, I must go.'
‘How will you get home? Shall I ring for a taxi?'
‘No thanks. I'll walk. I'll find a taxi.'
‘I'll walk with you,' said Louise, ‘just a little way. Sefton will look after the telephone. Come on, where's your coat, where's mine? It's terribly cold out and now it's foggy too.'
The door opened and the cold brown atoms of the fog rushed into the house. Sefton gave a soft plaintive cry like a bird's cry. Harvey went out through the door followed by Louise. Huddled in their overcoats they gasped, inhaling the thick bitter air and stepping cautiously upon the frosty pavements. Louise put her arm through Harvey's. ‘Harvey, you know you are one of the family. We all love you very much. I wish you would make your home with us. Don't worry, dear dear, Harvey. I'm sure Aleph will turn up tomorrow and explain everything.'
‘I hope
you
won't worry too much,' said Harvey. ‘She'll be all right, she can look after herself.'
‘Yes, of course, you are wise, you understand her so well, probably much better than I do, you have both been so close. What made you think she might be with Clement?'
‘Oh, not for any special reason. He's one of the family after all.'
‘Why, yes, of course. Look, there's a taxi, I remember you said you could conjure them up! Goodnight, my dear dear child, we'll be in touch, don't be upset. Have you got enough money for the fare?' She hugged him and kissed him twice upon his cold cheek.
Louise walked back to the house, tracking their footprints which were still clear in the thick powdery frost. She had come out without her key, but Sefton had put the door upon the latch and it opened silently at her pressure. She closed it, unlatching the lock and shooting the bolt. The kitchen was empty. Louise dialled Clement's number again but there was no answer. Sefton appeared. ‘Sefton, come and have some supper.'
‘No thanks, I've made myself a sandwich. I made one for Moy too. I think she's gone to bed. The kettle has boiled, by the way.'
‘You can't go to bed! Come and sit with me in the kitchen.'
‘Sorry, Louie, I'm awfully tired, I'm ready to collapse with tiredness.'
Louise poured the boiling water upon the fresh tea-leaves and inhaled the calm familiar aroma. A loaf was upon the table, with some butter and cheese from Sefton's sandwich-making, also some biscuits left over from tea-time. Sefton's door was closed. Louise left the kitchen and began to mount the stairs. Upon the second flight she found Moy sitting and crying, still clutching her uneaten sandwich in one hand.
‘Moy, don't grieve little one. Come down and sit with me. I'll make supper for you. Nothing bad has happened, all will be well.'
‘Yes – I hope – oh I'm so unhappy. And I miss Anax so much.'
‘Come on down and we'll have supper.'
‘I couldn't eat anything. I'm just going to bed. Oh I'm – so sorry – ' Moy rose and went on up the stairs, disappearing into the darkness at the top of the house.
Louise went back to the kitchen and poured some tea into a mug. She thought: something awful has happened and the children know it. She put away the butter. Carrying the mug she went up the stairs. The door of Aleph's room was open. She thought, I ought to search that room. But she went into her own bedroom, and to the window where the curtains had not yet been pulled, and looked down at the place where so long ago she had seen Peter Mir standing, half expecting to see him again. She left her bedroom door open, hoping and dreading to hear the telephone. She sat down on her bed in the darkened room and sipped the tea, but it was still too hot. She thought, this is the end of happiness, darkness begins here.
‘Where's Cora?' said Clement.
‘Gone to bed, I think.'
‘Gone to bed? Oh I see. Leaving us alone together.'
‘So it appears, dear Harlequin. What an innocent you are!'
‘She said “a dinner-party”. Then there's only three!'
‘And now there's only two.'
‘And soon there will be only one, because I'm going home.'
‘No you aren't, darling Harlequin. You are going to have some more whisky.'
Joan was right. Clement poured a small quantity of whisky into his tumbler and added a lot of mineral water. He sipped the mixture. He had reached a stage where he felt an overwhelming necessity to go on drinking. He had unsuspiciously accepted Cora's invitation, assuming that Joan might be present among others, but not anticipating the device evidently set up by Joan and her generous match-making hostess. Not that it mattered, he would soon walk out. He drank the whisky.

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