The Half-Stitched Amish Quilting Club (29 page)

All the more reason for me to show them that I can be independent, Emma thought
.

“Would you like to come over to my house for lunch after you’re finished with your phone call?” Mary asked.

“I appreciate the offer, but I’d better pass. I have some chicken noodle soup simmering on the stove, and after I eat, I’m going to take a nap. I want to make sure I get plenty of rest between now and Saturday.”

“That’s probably a good idea.”

Mary gave Emma a gentle hug, said good-bye, and headed for home.

Emma stepped into the phone shack and dialed Ruby Lee’s number. Again, no one answered, and Emma had to leave another message.

“Hello, Ruby Lee, it’s me, Emma Yoder. I’ve been trying to get in touch with you,” she said. “I hope you’ll be at the quilting class on Saturday. In the meantime, if you’d like to talk, please give me a call.”

When Emma left the phone shack, she stopped at the goat pen and watched Maggie and the other goats frolic awhile. She was glad Maggie couldn’t get out and make a pest of herself any longer. It had just made more work for Emma whenever the goat messed things up in her yard.

After Emma arrived back at the house, she discovered that a tear in her front screen door had been fixed. She figured Mary’s husband must have done it, maybe while she was taking a nap earlier in the week. Emma had been so out of it lately, she hadn’t noticed much of anything.

She paused to run her fingers over the spot where the tear had been and noticed what a fine repair job it was. She’d have to thank Brian for his thoughtful gesture right away.

Emma entered her house and went to the kitchen to check on the soup. Seeing that it was thoroughly heated, she turned off the stove and headed for Mary’s house.

“Did you change your mind about joining me for lunch?” Mary asked when Emma entered her kitchen a few minutes later.

“No, I just came over to tell Brian thanks for fixing the tear in my screen door.”

Mary shook her head, “Brian’s still at work, and no, Mom, it wasn’t him. Lamar fixed the tear in your screen.”

“How do you know that?” Emma asked, raising her brows.

“Because I saw him do it.”

“And you never said anything about it to me?”

“I was going to mention it when I spoke to you a bit ago, but you said you were in a hurry to make a call, so I decided it could wait.”

“Oh, I see.” Emma was thankful the screen had been fixed, but she wished it had been Brian who’d done it and not Lamar. Now she felt obligated to repay him in some way, because he’d done three nice things for her in one week.

Goshen

Since Mom was working at the restaurant and Star had gotten off work earlier this morning, Star had the house to herself again. That was fine with her. She was thankful Grandma had left this old house to Mom, because it was a place she could just relax and be herself. When Star was alone, she could sing and play her guitar without Mom telling her to tone it down. She could work on writing more songs without any negative comments. This morning, however, Star had decided to go through some of Grandma’s things that she’d found in the attic.

As she sat on the floor in the dusty, dimly lit room looking through a box of pictures she’d found in an old trunk, tears sprang to her eyes. She’d never seen any of these photos before, and it was hard seeing pictures of herself when she was a girl, sitting on Grandma’s lap. Those had been happy days, though, when Star felt loved and secure. But seeing the pictures made her miss Grandma even more.

If only I could feel that kind of love from Mom, she thought. But then, under the circumstances I guess she did the best by me that she could. It couldn’t have been easy raising a child alone. Maybe that’s why Mom married Wes. She was hoping to give me a father
.

Anger boiled in Star’s chest. That creep was anything but a father to me, and he sure wasn’t the kind of husband Mom or any other woman needed. He should have been put in jail for all the times he hit Mom. But no, Mom had either been too afraid of him to file a report, or maybe she was just plain stupid and liked to be smacked around. Who knows? Maybe Mom thought Wes was the best she could do and didn’t realize that she deserved better
.

Star swiped at the tears dripping onto her cheeks. The past was in the past, and it didn’t make sense to cry over what couldn’t be changed. At least they were rid of Wes now, and even though she didn’t care for Mike, she had to admit, he was a better choice for Mom than the wife abuser. Even so, Star hoped Mom wouldn’t marry Mike, because then Star would feel forced to move out of Grandma’s house—the only place that had ever truly felt like home.

Bringing her troubling thoughts to a halt, Star reached into the trunk and pulled out a few more photos, stopping when she came to a picture of Mom holding a baby in her arms. Star knew the baby was her, because she’d seen other baby pictures of herself. But part of this picture had been ripped away. Could there have been someone else in the photo? Had Mom, or maybe Grandma, torn the picture like that?

Was my Dad in the other half of this picture?
Star wondered.
Should I show this to Mom and ask her about it or keep it to myself?
Knowing Mom and the way she avoided the subject of Star’s real dad, Star figured if she showed the picture and started asking a bunch of questions, Mom would get real mad. However, if it was her dad, then Star really wanted to know, because she’d always wondered what he looked like and whether she resembled him or not. Maybe Mom had some other pictures of him hidden away somewhere that Star didn’t know about.

Star started to put the picture back in the trunk but changed her mind. She’d keep it in her wallet for now—until she decided whether to mention it to Mom or not.

W
hile Pam prepared supper on Friday evening, tears welled in her eyes as she reflected on the things Ruby Lee had said during the last quilt class, things about appreciating each other and not quarreling all the time. She could still hear the tone of almost desperation in Ruby Lee’s voice when she’d said,
“Have you ever stopped to think about how things would be if something happened to one of you? Worse yet, what if one of you died, leaving the other alone?”

Maybe I don’t appreciate Stuart enough
, Pam thought as she reached for some garlic powder to sprinkle on the ground beef patties Stuart would soon be putting on the grill.
Maybe it would help if I try to be a little nicer to him and show more appreciation for the good things he does
. That was one of the things their counselor had suggested, only Pam hadn’t put it into practice. But then, neither had Stuart.

“Daddy wants to know if the patties are ready,” Devin said, dashing into the kitchen at full speed and nearly running into the table. He was still in high gear, since today had been the last day of school and the kids’ summer vacation had officially begun.

Pam dabbed at her eyes so Devin wouldn’t see her tears. “Slow down, son. You know you’re not supposed to run in the house.”

“Sorry,” the boy mumbled, “but Daddy said I should hurry ‘cause the barbecue’s ready and he don’t wanna waste the gas.”

“Yes, the patties are ready, and I’ll take them out to him right now.” Pam picked up the platter and headed out the back door, hoping her eyes weren’t too red from crying. She found Stuart on the patio, fiddling with the control knob on their gas barbecue.

“Here you go,” she said sweetly, handing him the platter.

“Thanks.” Stuart put the patties on the grill and then stood off to one side where he could keep a watch on things. “What else did you fix to go with the burgers?” he asked.

“I made macaroni salad, and we’ll have chips, dip, pickles, and olives. Oh, and I baked some chocolate cupcakes for dessert.”

“Sounds good.” He offered her a crooked grin.

Pam’s heart skipped a beat. He hadn’t looked at her that sweetly in a long time.

Maybe there was some hope for their marriage, after all.

She leaned close to his ear and whispered, “I appreciate your help fixing supper tonight.”

“No problem. I’m glad to help out. And you know how much I enjoy barbecuing. Besides, it’s a nice way to celebrate the kids’ last day of school.” Stuart slipped his arm around Pam’s waist and pulled her close. It felt nice to have him show her some attention.

They stood like that for several minutes, until Stuart had to flip the burgers. “You know, I’ve been thinking it might be fun if I took Devin on a camping trip this summer … just the two of us. It would give us some father-son time, and I can teach him how to fish.”

“Why can’t we do something as a family?” she asked. “Something we’d all like to do.”

He quirked an eyebrow. “Such as?”

“We could take the kids to the Fun Spot amusement park. Or better yet, why don’t we make a trip to Disney World in Florida?”

Stuart shook his head. “A trip like that would take too long. I’ve only got a few days of vacation time left this year—just long enough for a few camping trips.”

Irritation welled in Pam’s soul. “Camping! Camping! Camping! Is that all you ever think about? Don’t you want to do anything Sherry and I might enjoy?” She clenched her fingers so tightly that her nails dug into her palms. “Don’t you love me, Stuart?”

“You oughta know I love you, but I enjoy being in the woods, and since you don’t like to camp, I thought I’d take Devin.” He paused long enough to flip the burgers again. “Can’t you and Sherry do something together? You know—some little mother-daughter thing like shopping or going to a movie?”

She shook her head. “I want us to do something as a family.”

“Then go camping with us.”

“I don’t like camping—especially in a tent. Worse than that, I don’t like being at home while you run off and do whatever you like with no consideration for what I might want to do.”

He frowned. “I’m taking that stupid quilt class, aren’t I? I’m doing it because I love you and want to make you happy.”

“The class is not stupid!”

His eyes narrowed. “I just said I love you, and all you heard was my comment about the class being stupid?”

“You didn’t think it was stupid when you went two weeks ago without me. Why was that, Stuart?” Pam’s voice rose higher with each word she spoke. “And why did you enjoy the class when you went alone but hate it when I was with you?”

“Lower your voice,” he said. “The kids or the neighbors might hear you hollering and think there’s a problem over here.”

“Were you just showing off for Emma and the others in the class, trying to impress them? Or were you trying to make me look bad—like I have all the problems and you’re Mr. Nice Guy?” she hissed, not caring in the least who might be listening or what they thought. “And who cares if the neighbors hear us and think there’s a problem? There
is
a problem. Don’t you get it?”

“I know there’s a problem, and no, I wasn’t trying to make you look bad. I told you before how it was. Don’t you believe me?”

“No, I don’t! What I believe is that you’d rather be alone or with other people than spend time with me.” She stamped her foot and scowled at him. So much for trying to make things work with Stuart. He was absolutely impossible! “You’re just like my father, you know that? He spent more time away from home than he did with me and Mom, and I hated him for it! They made me work hard in school, forcing me to get straight As. And yet when I did, all I got for my hard work was money and some really nice clothes. What I wanted was their unconditional love and to be with them as a family, but Dad never cared about any of that. All he cared about was himself!”

Stuart looked stunned and seemed unable to speak. “You … you’ve never told me any of that before,” he finally said. “I always thought you loved your dad, and that everything was perfect in your home when you were growing up.”

Pam gulped on a sob. “I did love him, but things were far from perfect. I’ve never admitted it to anyone before, but now you know.”