It made sense. Grandma Gang often watched her grandmother, but why hadn’t Shin called her? Or even Grandma Gang? She was a selfish bitch, all she was worried about was herself and here Natalie was getting her dream.
“Congratulations on the baby.” She even managed to put a little cheer in her voice she didn’t feel.
“Thank you. I’m so, so, so sorry about last night.”
All the foul emotions bubbled up from her chest. She rubbed her sternum and glanced around for an antacid. “I understand what happened, but it’s not okay. Someone should have called me. I would have come home earlier or something.”
She wouldn’t have fucked Quin. While she’d been scratching an itch, the most important person in her life had needed her.
“I know, I completely agree.” Natalie’s voice broke. The woman was sweet as pie. She was made to be a mother.
“I haven’t called your boss,” Kellie added, guilt weighing on her for making Natalie more stressed.
“It’s okay if you tell them. I, um, I turned in my two weeks. Scott wants me to be a stay-at-home mom, and there’s a history of tough pregnancies in my family. I’m sorry.”
Kellie leaned against the kitchen counter and blew out a deep breath. “Damn, why does this feel like you’re breaking up with me?”
In many ways, Natalie was family. She spent so much time at Kellie’s house, knew all about their lives. Sometimes they even hung out together. Hell, Kellie had gone to Natalie’s wedding. She wasn’t just someone Kellie paid to elder-sit, she was more than that.
“I’m sorry, Kellie.”
Kellie rubbed her eyes. This was craptastic and awesome all at the same time. “No need to apologize for moving on. I think it’s great you guys are setting up your family. I know you’ve really wanted that.”
“Yeah, but I feel like I’m letting you down.” Natalie’s voice cracked again. Kellie could picture her close to tears.
Kellie swallowed down the lump in her throat. “You aren’t, I just didn’t see this coming.”
“I still have two weeks. I’m supposed to be over there in an hour.”
“Are you sure you can do it? It sounds like you’re not doing so well this morning.” And shit, she was supposed to go to the hospital to see Carly today with Pandora and Brian. Her luck sucked.
“Yes, plus I want to check out Grandma, make sure she’s fine.”
“Okay, I’m going to figure out what happened with Shin. See you in an hour.”
She hung up and sucked down the rest of her coffee, not that she needed a spike to her system.
Natalie was leaving her. Already Kellie could feel a huge, gaping hole where the young woman had taken up residence as part of the family. It wasn’t a breakup, this was a divorce. Who would they get once she was gone? It was difficult to find someone to care for Grandma because of the language barrier, and that was before the Alzheimer’s.
She peeked into the living room where Grandma was sitting on the couch, picking at her breakfast. She would pick at it until Natalie got here. Pocketing her phone, Kellie trekked over to the Gangs’ house and pounded on the door.
Shin’s aunt answered, blinking up at Kellie with her typical befuddled expression. “Yes?”
“Is Shin here?” Somehow she managed to not snap out the question.
“He’s in the back.” The aunt thumbed her way into the house.
Kellie shook her head. “I’ll go around.” She didn’t want to step foot in that place. It was like an episode of
Hoarders on the Border
—too many people, too much stuff.
She let herself into the backyard by way of a side gate and found Shin, one of his younger cousins and a friend lounging in lawn chairs. Shin tilted his head back and looked down his nose at her, even though she towered over him.
The little shit was up to something.
“Do you want to explain last night to me?” she asked, stopping a few feet away from Shin.
He rocked back on the chair legs and crossed his hands over his stomach. “What is there to explain?”
She could imagine wrapping her hands around his neck and squeezing until his eyes bugged out of his skull. “Last night, according to my nurse, you told her you would call me and watch Grandma until I got there.”
Shin spared a glance for the two stony-faced men flanking him. These were people Kellie had grown up around, the same who snubbed her mother for marrying a white man and then her for daring to be born only half Korean.
“Sounds like you should fire your nurse. I have no idea what you’re talking about.” The bastard smiled.
Her vision hazed red. He didn’t see people, he saw pawns and things to be used, especially if those pawns were women. She lunged for him, fisting the front of his shirt and hauling him to his feet. He couldn’t bring his arms up fast enough to completely block the punch she aimed for his face. She clipped his jaw, snapping his head back.
Shin’s cousin grabbed her arm and pulled her away.
“He’s baiting you,” the younger Gang said.
She jerked out of the young man’s weak hold. Shin had pushed to his feet, his fists balled up at his side. She’d love to give him a black eye, broken nose. “You fucking cunt face, if you hate me, hate me. Don’t drag my grandmother into this.”
Shin sneered at her. “You’re going to regret that, Cho Hee.”
“Not as much as you’ll regret pissing me off.” She turned on her heel and stalked back to her house, blinking back hot tears. Given half a chance, she’d kill him.
* * * * *
Kellie settled into the backseat of the Jeep. Natalie had shown up at nine just like she’d promised, and half an hour later Brian and Pandora arrived to pick her up. There had been no sign of Shin.
“Morning.” Pandora handed her another cup of coffee, which she needed.
Kellie grunted in reply and shoved her sunglasses on. Even nine thirty in the morning was too fucking early. Brian and Pandora nursed their frou-frou lattes, trading quiet banter and ignoring her, for which she was grateful. She wasn’t ready to talk about last night with anyone.
She didn’t want to leave the house, except that this was the only time she could go and see Carly. She’d skipped the last two weeks and had only spoken to her briefly at the party. But today Kellie needed a distraction from her life. She was thankful for the time she’d spent sleeping at Quin’s house; it was the only sleep she’d had.
She bit her lip, stared out of the window and watched the cityscape bordering Highway 75 fly by. She’d never been familiar with Parkland Hospital before Carly’s accident. It was a small blessing, considering Grandma’s condition.
Even as early as it was, they still had to park far up in the parking garage. The heat wrapped around her lungs like a constrictor seeking prey. The hot coffee lost its appeal the instant she stepped out of the Jeep. She chucked it in a trash can and followed the happy couple through the maze of corridors, already lost.
Carly’s hospital room looked more like a bedroom. There were discarded bits of clothing, flowers, magazines and odds and ends everywhere. Most of them, after a first glance, appeared to belong to either Pandora or Brian.
A nurse stood next to the bed, clipboard in hand. She glanced over her shoulder and smiled.
“Nice to see you guys again,” the nurse said.
“Hey, Carly.” Brian’s voice was too loud in the small, tiled room, but the cheer was palpable.
Pandora had her smile firmly in place as well, though her greeting was more subdued. She waited until the nurse stepped away and closed in to give Carly a hug.
“Hi, guys.” Carly’s voice was a painful croak.
“Damn, that doesn’t sound good.” Kellie came to stand next to Pandora, firmly ignoring the catheter bag. An eighteen-year-old girl shouldn’t be reduced to partial paralysis and peeing in a bag. Looking at Carly, she had to wonder how much of this same situation she would have to go through with Grandma. How much longer could she keep her at home?
Doctors had encouraged Kellie a few years before to find a suitable nursing home for Grandma, but she’d held on to the hope that familiar surroundings would help. Part of her wished that she’d listened to her mother all those years ago and gotten married. A good Korean husband would see to it that their family stayed together, and she might have even been able to stay at home to administer the care herself. But Kellie had chosen a different path, one that she was happy with, though it made life difficult at the best of times.
She didn’t know how much longer she could keep things together. Not working wasn’t a possibility, and Grandma needed more care. She couldn’t trust friends to do it anymore. What if Grandma got hurt during the few hours she was left alone? What if something happened and she died alone?
“Kellie?”
She shook her head to clear her thoughts. “Sorry, sleeping on my feet.”
“You should take a day off.” Pandora peered at her, eyes narrowed.
“Can’t. Too many appointments. I’ll be all right.”
“How many nights have you closed in the last week?”
She shrugged. “It’s the nature of the business. Carly, what’s the latest news with you?”
Carly muted the TV and sighed. “They’re talking about another possible surgery on my hip, but I don’t know if they’re going to wait a while or do it soon. I should be released in about a week, then I’ll start physical therapy and trying to get movement back.”
Brian leaned against the bars on the opposite side of the bed. “Don’t rush it. Coming back from an accident like this takes a lot of time, but we’ll be there for you.”
Kellie wanted to offer her own support and promises, but she couldn’t make her mouth move. Carly would get better. With a coach like Brian, who had been in Carly’s shoes before, she’d walk again someday, but Kellie couldn’t help but compare her to Grandma. Grandma wouldn’t get better. Carly would leave the hospital bed, but Grandma would go into one. And then what? How would she handle that?
The coffee churned in her empty stomach. Maybe skipping breakfast had been a bad idea, but she’d been too worked up to eat.
“Excuse me for a sec, I need some air.”
“Something wrong?” Pandora turned from whatever Brian was saying and glanced at her.
“My stomach.” She backed away a few steps. “I’ll be okay, I’m just going to go grab something.”
“There’s a café on the first floor that should be open,” Brian offered.
“Yeah, I’ll go by there.”
Kellie strode from the room and struck off down a random hall, not wanting food at all. She just wanted space. Ahead of her, a frail, elderly woman shuffled along in a wheelchair by taking tiny steps. A man going the opposite way held on to an IV pole and cane for support.
Was that what Grandma’s future was like? How would she take care of her?
Though she might have abandoned many of the more traditional views of her native culture, honoring her elders and taking care of her family was most important. Grandma was all that she had left after Mom abandoned them.
Kellie wandered into the waiting room and sank down into an armchair. If she were honest with herself, she resented her mother for leaving them, even if she’d had good reason. But it was hard not to look for another source to blame her troubles on. Kellie was thirty-two. She should be living her life. Instead, she was trying to take care of everyone else. She wasn’t naïve enough to believe things could go on as they were, but she didn’t know what else to do.
* * * * *
Quin glared at the two men sitting in his office. Mouse looked like a sulking behemoth of a child. Jacob sat at right angles, his hands folded in his lap. A shiner swelled the younger man’s eye almost shut, but Jacob hadn’t complained once. In fact, if Quin hadn’t been going into the locker room to check supplies, he might never have known how the kid got the black eye.
“Do you want to tell me why you were fighting?” He leaned against the desk and crossed his arms. Neither responded. “You’re grown ass men, for fuck’s sake. This isn’t high school.”
Mouse’s hands balled into fists resting on his knees. “The gook started it.”
Quin’s blood boiled over. He’d taken a step toward his prize fighter before he realized it. “Mouse—”
“He has every right to be upset with me,” Jacob interjected calmly.
“Damn right I did. You sold me out, you fucking Chink.”
“That’s enough, Mouse.” Quin stood knee to knee with him, towering over the other man for the time being. He’d spent his time in the Marines. He understood slurs but had no tolerance for them, especially considering it was Jacob’s community he was trying to tap into. “What the fuck happened? Tell me now, or I’m going to suspend both of your asses.”
“You can’t do that!” Mouse gaped at him. A suspension from Quin’s program would mean no fights, and considering Quin was jockeying to get him a career-building fight, Mouse’s future rested in his hands.
“I can and I will. I might just for the way you’re talking.”
Jacob spoke first, his voice calm. “Mouse is upset I told you about the other day. He felt I needed to be reminded that we are a team.”
Quin backed up to the desk and gripped the edge. They were a bunch of fucking teenage girls. He wanted to strangle the lot of them.