The Hollywood Effect (29 page)

Jacinta laughed at me, making me relax slightly.
 

“It’s probably nothing. Don’t stress about it.”
 

“I’ll try not to. I’ve got my final Year 11 class this morning.”
 

“Nice. A bit of freedom coming our way soon! I love the end of the year. Year 12’s are gone, Year 11’s are finishing up. Before we know it the 10’s will be gone too and it will just be us and the little 7-9 devils. When are you seeing Buchanan?”
 

“Period 2.”
 

“All right. Well, let me know what he wanted at recess.” She patted my arm. “You’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”
 

I nodded and picked up my supplies. The bell was about to go and I wanted to get to class before the corridor turned into a jungle fight.
 

I managed to put the puzzle of the principal out of my mind for most of the lesson, although the clammy hands came back as soon as the bell went.
 

I dumped my stuff on my desk and then walked slowly up to the principal’s office. The door was open, and he was sitting at his desk, looking over some paperwork. I took a deep breath and knocked. He looked up and gestured for me to come in and close the door.
 

Uh oh.
 

“Jen. Thanks. Take a seat.”
 

I sat down rather tentatively.
 

Mr Buchanan took a deep breath and looked up at me.
 

“I won’t beat about the bush. We have another maternity leave teacher who has indicated that she would like to resume teaching next year. It’s not the teacher you replaced, but she is english and humanities as well, and to be blunt we just don’t have the students or funding for another teacher in your department. At the moment, we don’t have another position for you.”
 

Crap.
 

“Oh… I see.”
 

“Please don’t take it personally, we’ve been extremely happy with you here, and you’re a fantastic asset to the profession. Unfortunately it just comes down to numbers.”

“I… I understand. It’s okay.”
 

The principal nodded.
 

“I’m sorry to do this to you, this part of the job is never good.”
 

I didn’t know what to say to that, so I just stayed silent.
 

“I understand,” I eventually managed to splutter out.
 

“If anything changes, and we can keep you here, I’ll let you know.”
 

“Thanks, I appreciate it.”
 

I got up and walked out of the office feeling dazed, and yet slightly free. I’d anticipated being in Tarang for at least another year. If not longer.
 

“Hey, how’d it go?” Jacinta asked as soon as I sunk down into my desk chair.
 

“Ummm….” I started.
 

“What?” Jacinta asked, warily.
 

“I’m not coming back next year.”
 

“What!” Alarmed.
 

“It’s okay. It’s nothing I did. I don’t think. Another maternity leave person is coming back. There’s not enough students…”
 

“Bullshit.”
 

“Huh?” I looked up. Jacinta looked livid.
 

“It’s not fair! They can’t just kick you out because some mother is sick of her kids and wants to come back!”
 

I blinked. “Well, they can. That’s kind of the whole point of mat leave,” I said with a faint laugh.
 

“Oh I know,” Jacinta grumbled. “It’s just not fair to the people who fill in for them. How are you meant to plan anything when half the jobs being advertised are just mat leave positions which could be six months, or could be seven years. It’s crazy.” Jacinta paused and fiddled with her whiteboard marker. “Well, I suppose I’ll think it’s crazy until it’s me whose popping out babies, and then I’ll think it’s a great system,” she said with a self-deprecating laugh.
 

“It’s okay, really,” I said. “Staying in Tarang was never a long term plan for me.”
 

“Yeah, I know…” Jacinta sighed. “I’ll miss you,” she said.
 

I was a bit nervous about telling Dad that I’d be moving back to the city next year, and not staying after all, but he took it better than I expected. After making sure I was okay, he said that there wasn’t enough for me in the town anyway.
 

“Move back when you’re older and have kids. This isn’t much of a place for someone your age, Jen. Not with your ambitions.”
 

“What ambitions?” I laughed.
 

Dad shrugged. “Look around at the girls in your year level who stayed. What are they all doing?”
 

I quickly ran through my mental list. Babies. They’d all had babies. Some were on to their second, and one was even on to her third. None of them had been to university. One of them had even told me she was scared to go to Melbourne. It was too big and scary.
 

“Okay yeah. I’m not ready for babies yet.”
 

“I want grandchildren one day, don’t get me wrong. But I think for now,
 
you should explore the world.”

“I was just thinking of going back to Melbourne… but maybe if I can’t find a job there, I could go to London…” I mused out loud.
 

“Or Los Angeles?”
 

I shot a look at Dad. “I don’t know what’s going on there. I don’t think I want to live in Los Angeles. His house
is
very nice though…”
 

“Always knew you were the materialistic daughter.”
 

I rolled my eyes and stuck out my tongue.
 

I left Dad’s with a smile. We hadn’t joked around since before Mum died.
 

I kept re-reading Liam’s email, but I didn’t reply. I didn’t know what to say. I started typing out replies at least a dozen times, deleting them all. Then it started feeling like it had been too long. My cheek was getting a bit raw from chewing it so much.
 

I’d made it. The last day of school for the year! It was a slacker of a day; the kids weren’t even there. They’d had their last day the day before. Which was definitely a good thing, because Liam turned up at lunch time.

The piece of paper I’d been holding floated to the floor. I barely noticed. Liam was holding court in the middle of the staff room. Mrs Findley, the drama teacher, was all but fawning over him. Jacinta was having a hard time tearing her eyes away from him, and the trio of office ladies couldn’t stop giggling.
 

I slowly walked over to them, wondering if this was real, or if I was just having a particularly vivid dream.
 

Liam’s gaze met mine and I felt a bolt of electricity run down my spine.
 

“What are you doing here?” I demanded.
 

“I was feeling a bit nostalgic, so I thought I’d drop in and say hi.” There was the award winning smile. Jacinta swooned. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.
 

“That’s… nice,” I managed to get out. Liam looked hungrily at me. I couldn’t keep eye contact for long and mumbled something about needing to photocopy something and escaped. I could feel Liam’s eyes on my back as I walked out.
 

I leant against the copy machine and closed my eyes, taking a few deep breaths to try and steady my pounding heart.
 

“You never replied to my email,” Liam said. I opened my eyes. He was leaning on the door to the photocopy room. I drank him in. As gorgeous as usual. Slightly tired looking. Stubble a bit longer than he usually had it.
 

“No… I didn’t know what to write,” I said truthfully. Liam cocked his head at me. “What are you really doing here?”
 

Liam looked behind him. A lot of people suddenly needed to do things near the photocopy room.
 

“Can we go somewhere else?”
 

I glanced down at my watch. “I’ll be free in an hour.”
 

“Okay. I’ll meet you back here.”

I nodded, feeling dazed.
 

True to his word, Liam was back in an hour. My desk was all empty, ready for whoever would take my job next year. I looked around, slightly sadly, but mostly with relief. I didn’t think I’d ever be back here again. I did my rounds, said my goodbyes and see you laters, got wished good luck by almost everyone.
 

“Thanks again, Jen, for all your hard work. Have you got anything lined up for next year yet?” Mr Buchanan held out his hand. I shook it.
 

“No, not yet. I think I’ll head back to Melbourne, although I’m not entirely sure yet.”
 

“Well, remember, I’m happy to give you a glowing reference if you ever need one.”
 

“Thank you.”
 

And that was it. I pulled my bag over my shoulder, took one last look at the old school photos lining the hallway. I paused in front of the one taken when I was in Year 12. I was in the middle of the three boys. All of them towered over me, all with identical crazy grins. I smiled sadly. We had no idea that one of us would be dead and gone within the year. You never know what’s around the corner, do you.
 

I walked out the front doors. Liam was true to his word and waiting for me by the gate. For once, no one was surrounding him. No photographers lurking, or fans wanting autographs. I smiled in relief.
 

His eyes didn’t leave me as I walked up the path towards him.
 

“I’ve missed you,” he said simply when I reached him.
 

“I’ve missed you to,” I replied quietly and gave him a hug. It felt stupidly right, being in his arms.
 

“You can let go now,” I laughed when the hug went on way longer than usual. He smiled sheepishly at me.
 

“Shall we go for a walk around the lake?”
 

I nodded. The lake was one of the prettiest parts of the town, and conveniently quite close to the school.
 

“All done for the year then?” Liam asked conversationally.
 

“Yup. All done.”
 

“What are you teaching next year? Same classes?”
 

I shook my head. “I’m not.”

“Huh?”
 

“I’m not working there next year.”
 

“Oh…”
 

We kept walking. It was quiet, apart from the birds going bonkers in the trees.
 

“Have you got another job lined up?” Liam asked after a few minutes of slightly awkward silence.
 

“Nope. I have no idea what I’m going to do. I guess I’ll try and find a job back in Melbourne.”
 

Liam was silent. I glanced at him. He looked like he was mulling something over.
 

“What are you doing here?” I asked again. His eyes locked onto mine.
 

“I told you. I missed you. And you never answered my email.”
 

“So you flew all the way from Los Angeles to…” To do what?
 

“From Vancouver actually. We finished filming yesterday. Your sister said to say hi.”
 

“You saw Steph?”
 

Liam nodded. “Yeah, we had dinner a few times. Her new fella seems like a nice guy.”
 

“Yeah…” I wondered why Steph hadn’t mentioned hanging out with Liam.
 

“Want to sit for a bit?” We’d reached a nice little grove that had a wooden bench ready for us.
 

Liam took a deep breath.
 

“I can’t get you out of my head, Jen.”

I gazed at him helplessly. Truthfully I couldn’t get him out of my head either, but I didn’t know how to say it, and still keep my sanity.
 

“I know my life is pretty crazy. But I can’t… I don’t want to live it without you.”
 

“Liam…”
 

“So, I have a proposition for you. Just hear me out, please.”
 

I nodded. He reached out and held my hand.
 

“I love you, Jen.” I blinked. Love.
He loved me.
Not just lust, or like or fondness.
Love.
 

He stared at me, waiting for me to say something.
 

“That’s not fair, Liam. You know I love you. I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember. It’s not about that…” I gazed off over the lake. It was easier to look at than his hurt face.
 

“I’m going to take a year or so off. Maybe more.”
 

“What?” I turned to look at him again. He was staring at me intently.
 

“I’m gonna take next year off,” he repeated. “I need a break from all this.”
 

“But… what about your career?”
 

“I want to be a normal twenty-something year old again. I’m sick of my picture being taken all the time and getting followed and recognised. I want to go backpacking.”

“Where?” I asked, slightly dazed.
 

Liam shrugged. “South America looks nice. Maybe Europe. South-East Asia. I don’t know - anywhere. I’ll grow a beard, let my hair grow out. I’ll look proper hippie, no one will recognise me.”
 

I snorted. “You’re serious?”

“Deadly.”
 

“You’re crazy, you know that? What about your career?”
 

Liam shrugged. “Some things are more important. I can always go back if I want to. I have more than enough money to last me the rest of my life, so I don’t need to worry about that… you wouldn’t need to worry about that.”
 

“Me?”
 

“Come with me. Come travelling with me. You said yourself you don’t have a job or any commitments next year. Mum told me your Dad is doing a lot better too, so you wouldn’t have to worry about him as much.”