She pulled free, though it cost her, because she loved the feel of his hands on her. But best to get used to doing without, wasn’t it? “Doesn’t matter. Really. Let’s just finish up this proposal.”
“Right.” He watched her carefully, then said, “The proposal.”
Nicole shifted her gaze to the list in front of her and pushed her thoughts into linear compliance. Focus on the math, she told herself. Forget about fantasy. Forget about
what if
s. Take what you have and make the most of it before it’s gone.
The hardest thing to admit?
She was pretty sure it was already gone.
*
The next afternoon, the kitchen phone rang, and Nicole picked it up on the run. Connor was in the backyard and she didn’t want to leave him alone for long.
“Hello?”
There was a long pause and then a familiar voice asked, “Nicole?”
She grinned. “Katie, hi. How’s the vacation going?”
“Amazing,” her best friend said, and Nicole heard the smile in her voice. “Seriously, I love Europe. We stopped in Ireland to see Jefferson and Maura and the kids, then spent a few days in Edinburgh to visit Damian and see his new club.”
“Oh, you told me it has a ghost theme. Was it great?”
“Very. And a little scary,” Katie admitted. “I think it’s actually
haunted.
”
A twinge of envy filled Nicole at the wonderful things her friend was seeing, experiencing. One day, she promised herself, she, too, would see the world.
“Okay, that actually sounds like fun.”
Katie laughed. “You’re braver than me, then. Anyway, after we left Damian’s we spent a few days in London and, oh, my God, Nicole, it’s just…”
Nicole sighed. “I can hear it in your voice.”
Still laughing, her friend said, “Good, because I don’t think I can describe it. Anyway, after that, we went to Switzerland and now we’re in Italy and I think I’m in love with this place. The food alone is orgasmic.”
“I’m so jealous,” Nicole said.
“I’m jealous of
you.
” Katie sighed. “You’re in Long Beach. As great as this trip’s been, I’m so ready to come home. Is that weird?”
“No,” Nicole said, moving to the window so she could keep an eye on Connor while she talked. She so understood Katie’s feelings.
This interlude with Griffin had been wonderful. Actually too wonderful, she admitted silently. As Katie said, it had been orgasmic. Yet as much as she hated it, she knew that going home would be best. Leaving Griffin and this idyllic time behind her. Get back to normal—though normal would be different now, too. Because after this time with Griffin, her house would feel emptier than it had. Lonelier than it had.
She sighed a little, and Katie must have heard it.
“Nicole,” she asked, “is something wrong?”
“No,” she answered quickly. Too quickly, it seemed.
“Okay, I don’t believe you.”
“Why not?”
“For one thing, you’re at my house instead of yours. What happened?” Katie’s voice dropped into a serious tone that brooked no argument. “Did Griffin do something? Do I have to kill him?”
So much for secrets. Nicole glanced out the window at Connor, digging happily in the flowerbeds. No matter what else happened in her life, Nicole thought, she had her son. That would get her through anything.
“No,” she said finally, “you don’t have to kill Griffin.”
“Oh, God,” Katie groaned. “You slept with him, didn’t you?”
Shaking her head, Nicole took the phone from her ear and stared at it in wonder. It was like her friend had X-ray vision or something. “How can you tell that through the phone?”
“Easy. I know the King men.” Clearly disgusted, Katie muttered, “I told him to stay away from you. Heck, I told
all
of them to stay away from you.”
“Yeah, so Griffin told me. Thanks for that, by the way. What am I, twelve?”
“No,” Katie said quickly, “but you’re vulnerable and they’re all so…”
“Oh, they really are.”
“Damn it.”
“It’s not his fault anyway, Katie. Griffin was staying away,” Nicole told her with a sigh. “I went after him.”
“Oh.” Katie was quiet for a minute. Then, “I don’t know what to say, I guess. But, Nicole…”
“Look, something happened at my house and I couldn’t stay there and—”
“What happened?”
“Griffin accidentally started a fire in my kitchen and I didn’t have a place to stay, so Griffin offered to let us move in here while Lucas and his crew fixed my kitchen and…” She was talking too fast and couldn’t seem to stop herself.
“A
fire?
”
“A small one.”
“Oh,” she said with a laugh, “well, then.”
Nicole blew out a breath. “The point is, my house is almost fixed and I’ll be moving home soon…” Did she sound as depressed about that as she felt?
“And what about you and Griffin?” Katie asked. “You’re telling me you can just walk away without a second thought?”
“I am,” she said, and wished she meant it.
“Sweetie, that’s just not who you are. But sorry to say, it
is
who Griffin is. Nicole, you have to know what he’s like. He’s commitment-phobic. Seriously. I mean, Rafe was a challenge, but Griffin is impossible. Being single is like a religion to him.”
“Yeah, I know,” Nicole told her, leaning on the kitchen counter. With her free hand, she brushed at a few toast crumbs she had missed after Connor’s lunch. “Katie, I’m not looking for a husband, remember? And if I was, I wouldn’t be looking at Griffin.”
My God, could your tongue actually fall off from an overload of lies?
“Oh, honey,” Katie said on a half groan. “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”
Irritation spiked. “How did you get that out of what I said?”
“I notice you’re not denying it.”
She should. She really should. Otherwise, here came the sympathy train, which she wanted to avoid. But Katie was her best friend, and Nicole couldn’t lie to her over the long haul. And let’s face it, once Katie got home and found Nicole miserable, she’d know the truth anyway, so what was the point? “Okay, I might be. Maybe. Probably.”
“Nicole…”
“Fine. Yes. I am,” she said, grinding out each word. “What’re you, a master interrogator?”
Katie laughed a little. “I don’t even know what to say to you.”
“No sympathy, okay?” Nicole interrupted before her friend could get going. “I don’t need you to feel sorry for me, really. I’m a big girl. I knew what I was doing, and I’ll be fine. Honestly.” She lifted her chin and squared her shoulders. “I was doing great on my own before and I will again.”
“Of course you will.”
“Thank you,” she said, glad to have her friend’s support.
“But I’m still going to have Rafe beat him up.”
Nicole laughed and shook her head as if Katie could see her. “No, you’re not. You’re not going to tell Rafe. You’re going to pretend you don’t know any of this.”
“Uh-huh. Why would I do that?”
“Because I’m asking you to,” Nicole told her.
“I don’t know, Nicole. I feel like I should tell Rafe what happened.”
She didn’t want one more person to know if she could help it. “Just let it go, okay, Katie? This is between me and Griffin, and it’s almost over, anyway.”
“Damn it,” Katie muttered, “Griffin’s never getting another cookie from me as long as he lives.”
Outside, Connor stood up and headed for the gate between the yards. Nicole leaned toward the window and tilted her head so she could make sure that the, gate was closed. It wasn’t. Griffin must have left it open when he went next door.
Connor was going to run right into a construction area.
“I gotta go, Katie. Connor’s running off to our house, and the guys are working there.”
“Go, go! I’ll see you in a few days!”
Nicole hung up and sprinted for the doorway. She was across the yard and through the gate a couple seconds later. Connor was just toddling toward the house and the sound of the construction crew when Nicole came up behind him and swept him off his feet.
He giggled and shrieked when she lifted him into the air before plopping him onto her hip. Here was her world. Safe and secure and held close to her heart. Whatever else happened, she and Connor would get through it all. Together.
“Escape artist, huh?” She grinned and tickled him until he squirmed in delight. “No visiting our house without me!”
Laughing and pointing, Connor looked at the house and said, “Home!”
She followed his gaze. Home. Where they belonged. The two of them. The way it was supposed to be. Maybe it was time to start moving toward the future. Start letting go of the fantasy and take the first step back to normalcy. Nicole started for the house before she could think about it. It was past time to see what was going on in there. Past time to remember who she was and where she really belonged.
Besides, she could at least warn Griffin that Katie knew what was happening between them—and that his cookie connection had been cut off.
She took the back steps quickly, opened the screen door and stepped into a strange new world.
Griffin and Lucas were arguing over something at the counter, their backs to her, so they didn’t see her come in. Nicole took a moment to simply stare at what had been done to her grandmother’s old, familiar kitchen.
Shaking her head, she looked from the pale-green walls to the light-wood cupboards, from the tiled floor to the
granite
countertop that was exactly the stone she had once described to Griffin. There was a six-burner gas stove on one wall and a brand-new French-door fridge on another.
This wasn’t the kitchen she had asked for.
This was her dream kitchen.
The one she couldn’t afford.
“Griff!” Connor shrieked and both men spun around to stare at her with matching expressions of guilt.
But it was Griffin’s gaze Nicole caught with her own. Then she managed to croak out, “What the hell have you done?”
Nine
“B
usted,” Lucas muttered.
“I can’t believe this,” Nicole said, setting Connor on his feet and glaring at Griffin.
“How did you—
why
did you—” She spun in a tight circle, sending her hair into a blond wave around her head before she stopped abruptly and glared at him again. “You had no right.”
Griffin gritted his teeth and faced the fury of the woman across from him. He’d known this moment would arrive, he just hadn’t expected it this soon. Lucas and the crew still had some finishing work to do, so Griffin had thought he would have a couple of days before this particular fight. Now that it was here, though, there was no avoiding it.
“Nicole, this is your dream kitchen.”
“Yeah, it is,” she said. “And one day I would have had it.”
“Instead, you have it now,” he said, refusing to acknowledge the cold, clipped tone to her voice. “What’s the difference?”
“Are you crazy?” she countered. “The difference is that I would have paid for it. I can’t afford this now.”
“It’s all been paid for,” Lucas offered, and she turned her glare on him.
Jabbing a finger toward Griffin, she asked, “Yes, paid for by whom?
Him?
How is that ethical? What kind of business are you running anyway, Lucas?”
“Ethical?” He stiffened and shot a quick look at Griffin. “I’m damn ethical, and we did some great work here.”
“Work that I didn’t order,” she reminded him. “I didn’t sign off on any of this.” She gulped in a breath. “I could sue you!”
Lucas shot a hard look at Griffin.
“Relax,” he said, “she’s not going to sue King Construction.”
“Really?” Nicole argued. She folded her arms over her chest and tapped the toe of one foot against the gleaming tiles in a furious rhythm. “Know me that well, do you?”
“Yeah, Nicole,” Griffin said, taking his life in his hands to move a step closer to her. “I think I do. You’re pissed right now, but once you’ve had time to think it over, you’ll realize I was right to do this.”
“Oh, that’s so not going to happen,” she muttered darkly.
“If it helps,” Lucas put in, “Griff meant it as a surprise for you. He’s covered all the bills insurance won’t cover.”
“Not helping,” Griffin said without looking at his cousin.
“Has he?” Nicole’s gaze narrowed on Lucas briefly, but it was long enough to have the man taking one long step to the side of Griffin. Obviously, he was trying to stay out of range.
“A surprise.” Nicole glanced down at Connor to make sure her son was nearby, then she lifted her gaze to Griffin again. “Flowers are a surprise. A box of chocolates. A damn teddy bear. Not a
kitchen!
”
“Gotta admit, you
were
surprised,” he said and shrugged as if completely unaffected by her fury.
“And you thought I’d like this.”
“Of course you like it,” Griffin ground out. “Hell, you
love
it. You’re just too stubborn to admit that you’re glad I took care of the changes.”
She just blinked at him and a corner of Griffin’s mind warned him that that wasn’t a good sign.
“You are unbelievable.” Her breath huffed in and out of her lungs. “What made you ever think even for a second that I would want you to do this? I
told
you I didn’t need your help.”
And he was tired of hearing it. What was he, blind? “Yes, you told me that. But it’s bull. You
do
need my help, you just don’t want it.” Griffin crossed his arms over his own chest, deliberately mimicking her stance. “Well, too damn bad, Nicole. You got it whether you want it or not.”
“The last time that happened, there was a
fire.
”
He winced, but stood his ground.
She looked at Lucas. “Rip it out. All of it.”
Lucas actually paled.
Griffin’s temper snapped. “Now who’s being crazy? He’s not going to destroy a kitchen he just finished building. Take a look around, Nicole. This is the room you described to me. The tiles. The color of the paint. The damn granite that the guy spent two weeks looking for!”
She only stared at him. “I didn’t ask you for this, Griffin. What I told you was a dream. Idle imagination.”
“And now it’s not.”
This wasn’t going at all the way he’d hoped it would. He knew she’d be pissed, of course, but he’d thought that seeing the kitchen of her dreams right there in front of her would take the sting out. And okay, yeah, he’d expected her to thank him for going to all the trouble of making sure she got what she damn well deserved.
“It wasn’t up to you to do this, Griffin,” she said, and her voice was softer, lower, as if most of the anger had drained away. But her eyes belied that supposition. They were still flashing, still furious.
“Look, it’s done.” And even he wasn’t sure why it had been so important to him to give her this. He only knew it had been, and now that it was done, he wanted her to enjoy it. To cook in it every day. To remember him every time she walked into the room.
Griffin frowned as that thought flashed in his mind. Where had that come from? Shifting uncomfortably, he ignored the truth he’d just stumbled on and asked, “Why don’t you at least take the time to look around?”
“Yeah, uh,” Lucas said, gathering his clipboard from the shining granite countertop. “I’ll be going. You two work this out, and let me know who wins.”
Nicole shot him a look that should have curled his hair. But clearly Lucas was accustomed to dealing with furious women. He just gave her a smile and slipped out of the room like a damn ghost. So much for family loyalty, Griffin told himself. Who knew a King could be a coward?
Well, fine. He could handle Nicole on his own. He’d been doing it for almost three weeks, right? He knew her, body, heart and mind, and he knew damn well that underneath all of her protests, she wanted this kitchen.
“Go ahead, Nicole. Look.” Even God was on his side in this, Griffin thought, since the late-afternoon sunlight washed across the dream kitchen in a sweep of gold. The pale-oak cabinets looked as golden as the light. The floor gleamed, and the granite countertop shone like a mirror.
He ran one hand over the granite and her eyes were drawn to the motion. “It’s exactly as you described it,” he said softly.
She swallowed hard and scooped up Connor when he would have scuttled out of the room. “I know. And it’s even more beautiful than I imagined it would be.”
“And the stove.” He moved toward the professional-grade appliance. “Six burners, and they all work.”
A smile teased at the corners of her mouth, but disappeared way too fast. “It doesn’t change anything, Griffin—”
“The fridge I had to guess at, since you didn’t really say one way or the other.” He pulled open the doors and let her stare into the interior. Boxes of Connor’s favorite juice drinks were on the top shelf, and in a wine rack was a bottle of champagne he’d planned to spring on her later.
He watched her expression, and in spite of the anger still churning inside her, he could see how much she loved her new kitchen. Her gaze swept over the tile floors and across the freshly painted walls and landed, for just a minute, on the rooster teakettle he had cleaned up. An unexpected emotion rushed through him and caught Griffin by surprise.
This had started out as a way to pay her back for what he’d done to her house. Then it had become a way to please her, more for his own sake than anything else, he could silently admit. He had wanted the fun of giving her something she hadn’t expected. But now it was more than all of that. He wanted her to have it because he knew how important it was to her. The dream she’d described had been too detailed to be just idle wishful thinking. Watching her eyes as she’d told him had convinced him that this dream meant more to her than even she had known.
And besides all of that, he realized now, he’d wanted her to have it so that she’d never forget him. So that his presence would be stamped on her house. Her world. He wanted her to remember him long after he was gone, because Griffin knew he wouldn’t be forgetting her.
“It’s really beautiful, Griffin,” she said on a sigh. “But that’s not the point.”
“Then what is the damn point, Nicole?” Annoyance chewed on him. He kept his voice low and even because he didn’t want to scare Connor, who was watching him through wide blue eyes. “Tell me, because from where I’m standing, I did something nice for you and I’m getting slapped by it.”
Shaking her head, she looked around the kitchen again, and when she finally turned her gaze back to Griffin, she said, “Don’t you get it? You doing all of this—” she waved one hand in the air, as if to encompass the entire room “—it’s like you’re
paying
me to have sex with you.”
“What?”
Okay, that he hadn’t expected. Insult slammed home, and he gaped at her in astonishment.
“It’s the big payoff,” she continued. “Most men give tennis bracelets or a necklace or something—”
As she spoke, guilt and something he thought might be
shame
nibbled at him. That’s exactly what he did when he walked away from whichever woman he was spending time with. Usually he didn’t even bother buying the trinket himself. He simply had his assistant, Janice, pick up something at the jewelry store and send it in his name. Did those women feel like Nicole did? He wondered but had no answer.
But that wasn’t important here, was it?
“That’s insane. And insulting,” he added, before grinding his teeth again. “I don’t pay for sex.”
“Ah, well,” Nicole said, “You don’t have to, do you? Women just line up and take their turns, hoping you’ll smile down on them, is that it?”
Uncomfortable with the shift in conversation, he tried to turn it back. “Where the hell is this coming from?”
“I’m sorry, am I not being grateful enough?” she asked, bouncing Connor on her hip. The little boy didn’t look happy, and Griffin knew just how the kid felt.
Before he could think about it, he snatched Connor from Nicole and held the boy up close against his chest. Connor leaned his head on Griffin’s shoulder and sighed. “Griff play ball?”
“Soon, buddy,” he promised and ran one hand down the boy’s back in a comforting pat.
“Griff, wanna play.” The little boy gave his best begging smile and a curl of something warm settled in Griffin’s chest.
“Pretty soon, kiddo,” he said, then turned to look back at Nicole. “Now how about we just get down to it? I wanted to do something nice for you,” he started.
“I didn’t want you to—”
“Contrary to popular belief, I don’t need your permission to do a damn thing.”
“To my kitchen you do.”
“Apparently not,” he mused and leaned back against the cold granite counter. New tack, he thought. Don’t fight fury with fury. Instead, brush it off. Let her know that her anger wasn’t changing anything.
“Your cousin—”
“Is out of this. I told Lucas to do it, so your issue is with me, not him.”
“Oh,” she said with a grimace, “trust me, I know who I have issues with.”
“Good, then let’s get this settled now.” He moved in closer and she didn’t budge an inch. “I set fire to the kitchen. It’s my job to see it fixed.”
“The way I can afford it.”
“Fixed. Why the hell are you fighting me on this?”
“Because I take care of myself, Griffin.”
“Who’s arguing?” he demanded and jiggled Connor when the boy made a sound of distress. “You’re the most self-sufficient person I’ve ever known. I respect that. Hell, you’re smart and funny and capable and—”
“Your accountant?”
He stopped, took a breath and blew it out again. That phone call from Brittany kept biting him in the ass. He hadn’t meant to insult Nicole; he just hadn’t wanted to talk to Brittany any longer than he absolutely had to. And now that he thought about it, he’d given Brittany a diamond necklace. Damn.
“You’re more than that to me,” he finally said.
“Really, what am I then?”
There was that question again, he thought wildly. And he still didn’t have a complete answer. All he knew was, Nicole had touched him on levels he hadn’t even been aware of having before her. Levels he wasn’t entirely comfortable acknowledging even to himself.
He couldn’t give her an answer, so instead, he asked, “Is it so hard to accept that this was important to me?”
Confusion gleamed in her eyes, but at least, he thought, the raw anger was gone.
“Yes,” she said softly, “I guess it is. Why, Griffin? Why was this important to you?”
He shoved one hand through his hair, looked down at the little boy in his arms and then shifted his gaze to the boy’s mother. Something inside him turned over, and heat spilled through him. Not the fiery, lust-ridden flames that had been engulfing him for days. This was a warmth that seemed to slide into every dark and empty corner he possessed. Looking into her eyes gave him more than he’d had before. And even as he recognized that, he knew he couldn’t keep it. Couldn’t risk what he might find if he let his guard down.
Shaking his head, he asked, “Does it really matter?”
Disappointed by his evasion, she looked around her again, then rubbed her hands up and down her upper arms. “Griffin, you really shouldn’t have done any of this.”
Maybe not, but he wasn’t sorry about it. “Yeah, well, I did.”
“And now I have to pay you for it.”
“Damn it, Nicole…”
“No,” she said quickly. “It’s the only way. I’ll make…payments or something, I don’t know. Shouldn’t take more than twenty or thirty years,” she added in a mutter.
He gave an audible sigh. The woman annoyed him as often as she intrigued him, and that was saying a hell of a lot. “Connor, your mother is the most stubborn woman in the world.”
“That’s pretty much pot-kettle territory,” she pointed out.
Well, she had him there. “Fine. You want to pay me back? Do some work for my company.”
He’d surprised her again.
“What? Now you want to hire me?”
He was out of options, Griffin told himself. If he wanted to make this right with her, and he did, then he had to do something. And work was the one thing Nicole completely understood. Her work ethic was as finely honed as his own, so he knew he had her with this one.