The Lion Triumphant (59 page)

“’Twas such a night,” he said, staring into his ale, “a rare night. What if you should be with child?”

I stared at him. “It is not possible.”

“We shall see. ’Twould not surprise me. I’d say you were a lusty wench. You’ll breed … you and I together. I’d swear that we had started already.”

“No,” I cried shrilly. “No. Let us go now. I cannot endure any more of your company.”

“Then we shall go. I will take you back to your father’s house.”

“The sooner I am rid of you the better.”

As he went out he said: “Do not hesitate too long. Who knows, I might find someone else to my taste. I am ready for a wife and I am not known for my patience.”

“I shall commiserate with her when the time comes.”

He laughed. “Let us hope it is yourself. Commiserating with oneself is a more frequent habit than with others. My little bird. Pah! Linnet! More like an eaglet I’d say. To me you shall be Girl until you become Wife.”

“I am of the opinion that after today you will never have an opportunity to call me anything.”

“We shall see,” he said.

We rode onward and I was never more pleased to see the familiar portico with the lions on either side. My mother had heard our approach and came running out of the house. Jennet was with her and so was my little sister Damask. I jumped from my horse and threw myself into her arms.

“Dearest child,” she murmured. “Oh my darling Linnet. What a terrible night it has been.”

It was so wonderful to see her before me that I forgot everything else but that we were together. She kept looking at me and I knew what terrible anxieties she had suffered until she had word that I was safe. I trembled to think what she would suffer still further when she knew what had happened to me.

Then I was aware of him. He stood there, his legs wide apart, watching us with an almost benign expression as though he had given us to each other. I wanted to run into the house and hide myself. I saw that he was watching me sardonically. Was he waiting for me to denounce him as my seducer that he might tell them that I had offered no resistance? Did he think they would believe him in preference to me?

Those moments in the courtyard seemed to go on for a long time. It was as though time was waiting for me to act. I could denounce him. What then? My father was not here but when he came back he would kill Colum Casvellyn. Or he might be killed himself. There was no sense in that. What was done was done.

I was amazed at myself. Was I reconciled already? I longed to get away from him and think what I must do. I must wait, brood on what had happened, ask myself what I should do about it.

My mother was saying: “It was good of you to send word that my daughter was safe and again to bring her home as soon as was possible.”

“I only did what any gentleman would do,” he said, inclining his head.

I was hard pressed not to shout at him and denounce him for the wicked creature he was, but I saw that it would only upset my mother more.

“Come into the house and refresh yourself,” said my mother.

She led him into Lyon Court. He complimented her on the charm of the house. “So modern,” he said, “compared with Castle Paling. They built spaciously in the old days but without the same view to comfort. Of course we improve on the Castle from time to time but it is not the same as doing it all in the best possible way first.”

“Old houses are so fascinating though,” said my mother.

“Oh yes. So much has happened in them. When I contemplate the villainies of my ancestors I begin to think the castle must be populated with evil spirits.”

My mother took him into the small room which led from one of the galleries. Damask looked up admiringly at Colum Casvellyn. He must have seemed like a giant to her. He lifted her up and held her high above his head. I was annoyed that she showed her adoration so blatantly.

“Damask has taken a fancy to you,” said my mother.

“And I to Damask. What an unusual name. You have original names in this family.”

My mother looked pleased. She did not see that he was sneering.

“Damask is named after her grandmother. She was born the year Dr. Linacre brought the damask rose to England.”

“And Linnet?” he said, smiling blandly at me.

“We thought she would be a boy and we had decided to call her Penn—a family name. At the last moment we had to change that and she was so like a little bird …”

I felt sick with shame. What had happened to my mother’s good sense? Did she not realize that this man was an enemy? Of course she did not know how he had treated me. She saw him only as my rescuer. I wanted to shout the truth. I had a feeling that he was waiting for me to do so and in fact was rather hoping that I would, but something warned me. Wait, I cautioned myself. Do not act rashly. Think about this.

I was longing for him to leave that I might go to my room. I wanted to take off my clothes, examine my bruises, wash and put on clean clothes. As if I could make myself clean again … ever.

“My dearest Linnet,” said my mother, “you are quite exhausted.”

“I would like to go to my bedchamber and wash and rest …”

“But of course.” She smiled at Colum Casvellyn. “You will understand. But pray do not hurry away. I regret my husband is not at home. We can have a room prepared for you. You will wish to rest a while after your journey.”

“I am used to journeys and since my mission is completed must be on my way.”

I had risen and my mother called Jennet.

“You should rest, my dear,” she said to me. “It has been an ordeal.”

I wanted to shout: You don’t know what an ordeal! I could see his eyes on me, mocking, daring me to tell my mother exactly what had happened.

Jennet came in and my mother told her to take hot water to my room; and she herself would bring me a posset which her grandmother had always brewed for exhaustion.

Jennet grasped a reluctant Damask by the hand and I took a cool leave of Colum Casvellyn.

He bowed. “It gave me great pleasure to be of service, particularly after my manners on the first occasion.”

“You did let us have the room,” said my mother.

“But, Madam, can you forgive me for my churlish manners. I confess I had been drinking too much of the landlord’s wine.”

“I would forgive anything for what you have done this night.”

I wanted to scream and I could see he was suppressing his mirth. He had said he was possessed by a devil. Indeed it seemed so.

I went to my room. It was easier to think there. Jennet brought my hot water. I took off my clothes. I could not get out of my mind the image of his removing them. I should never wear them again. I washed my body and put on clean garments. Strangely enough, I felt better. I went to the window for I heard voices below. My mother was showing him the gardens.

It was unfortunate that he should have looked up and seen me there.

He lifted his hand to his lips as he had on that other occasion. My mother by good luck had not seen me.

I turned hastily away from the window.

When my mother came in with the posset I was lying on my bed.

She knelt beside the bed and laid her hand on my forehead.

“Oh, Linnet, I don’t think I shall ever forget that moment when I saw that man riding away with you. We should never have taken that journey. There should have been more grooms to protect us. Next time I shall see that they are armed. Thank God that man was there. Who would have thought that it should be the one we disliked so much at the inn.

I should tell her now. She would advise me what to do.

Not yet, I thought. I am not ready to talk yet. I must think about it.

Think about it! I could do nothing else. It was there in my dreams and when I was awake. Images came into my mind. I was not sure whether I imagined these things or whether they had actually taken place.

All I knew was that I could never be the same again, and as the days passed I began to realize that I would not speak to my mother of what had happened. It would be too distressing to us all.

My father came home and when the house was filled with his vital presence I told myself he must never know. I was aware what would happen if he did. He would set out with a cutlass and nothing would satisfy him but the head of Colum Casvellyn.

For that man I cared not but there was a notion of which I could not rid myself. There was a growing conviction in my mind that whatever conflict he entered into he would emerge the victor. He was like my own father, but he was young and my father was no longer so.

Colum Casvellyn must not be allowed to bring more tragedy to my family. And the only way I could prevent this happening was to remain silent.

The hideous happenings of that night must be my secret … and his.

C
HRISTMAS CAME AND THERE
were the usual festivities although my father had said there should be very special rejoicing in the culmination of this year of victory. It was now over a month since my adventure. It still haunted me. My mother noticed that I had changed and asked me if I were well. I assured her I was, and still I said nothing, which was strange for previously I had always shared confidences with her. But of this I could not talk.

We decorated the great hall with holly and ivy; and there was much singing and dancing and playing with cards and dice. The servants enjoyed this for they were only allowed to do it during the Christmas season, therefore it seemed especially exciting as all forbidden things do. There was a law which forbade craftsmen and servants to gamble, which most of us said was for their own good. Of course a man of substance could do as he wished. My father liked to gamble. He was a gambler by nature and he was inclined to be very lenient with servants who broke the law in that way.

So Christmas was celebrated with the dice and cards and the mummers and masking; and it was as I remembered it had been all my life.

“Last Christmas,” said my mother, “the fear of the Spaniards hung over us like a black pall. This year we are free.” I wished I felt free. A greater black pall hung over me, for a national disaster can never really affect us like a personal one.

With the new year the Landors came for the proposed visit. Loving to boast about his possessions, my father had wished to impress them with his wealth. My mother retorted that the Landors were a wealthy family and would not be amazed by that in others, particularly if it were thrust under their noses to be remarked on.

But my father would have it his way. I knew he was very excited about the prospect of new business interests.

New Year, he said, should be celebrated much as Christmas. A Lord of Misrule should be appointed through a certain trinket to be found in one of the cakes or puddings and that should add to the fun. It was to be a right merry welcoming in of the new year, for he prophesied it would be a year of great prosperity for England.

My mother said to me: “It will be a pleasure to see the Landors again. Do you think so too, Linnet?”

She was looking at me intently and I could not meet her eye. I said that I should indeed be pleased.

“It seems that they will join with your father. I like the idea. I daresay we shall see a great deal of them in the future.”

I could see she was already planning my wedding. Now was the time to tell her. I began: “Mother …” There was a dreamy look in her eyes. I could see she was visualizing the bride and bridegroom and all the preparations that must go into a wedding. And again I could not bring myself to speak of that night at Castle Paling.

On the last day of the old year the Landors arrived. Fennimore took my hands in his and smiled at me. I felt my heart uplifted a little, because he was so different from Colum Casvellyn. How gentle he was, how tender he would be.

My father and mother were in the courtyard welcoming the guests, my father shouting orders and making the servants run hither and thither, my mother taking quiet command.

We took them to their rooms and they pleased my father by admiring Lyon Court. The smell of roasting and baking filled the house and it was a very merry party which sat down to supper that evening. Edwina had come over with Carlos, for Carlos was very interested in the new venture and would indeed have a share in it. So would Jacko; and young Penn was determined to learn all he could.

Edwina was beginning to show signs of pregnancy; she had changed; she was more beautiful I thought because there was such a lovely serenity on her face. She had always been so anxious when Carlos went away on his voyages. Now, I thought, she will have a child to care for and she will be happier.

She talked to me about the coming child when we were alone.

“I’m so happy, Linnet,” she said. “I’ve wanted this so much … and so has Carlos. We thought it would never happen and now it has. Is it not strange? For so long we have been married and yet some people conceive immediately. I really began to think there was something wrong with me.”

I said it was wonderful to see her so delighted and asked what she hoped for, a boy or a girl.

“Carlos wants a boy of course. Men always do.”

“My mother says they so admire themselves that they want to see a replica. That is why they want sons.”

Edwina laughed. “I simply don’t care. I merely want a baby. You’ll know how I feel one day, Linnet.”

There followed a week of pleasant friendship. The men were often together talking of ships and the trade they would bring throughout the world. My father took the Landors on to those of his ships which were in the Sound and they planned all kinds of alteration to them which would render them more suitable for the new project. My mother was very happy. I knew she had decided on Fennimore for me and she believed that before the visit was over an announcement would be made.

It was at the New Year that the frightening possibility had come to me. It could have happened. He himself had suggested it. I was not sure of course but I soon should be and what should I do then?

I feigned a headache and shut myself in my room. My mother sent Jennet up with a posset for me. Jennet was a very talkative woman and her conversation was full of hints about men. It had always been so. My mother used to say: “Jennet was made as she is. I suppose we can’t blame her.”