The Lost Queen (8 page)

She studied him without speaking. Didn't he trust her to keep her promise to Oberon that she would find Titania? Did he think she would forget all about it?

When she finally spoke, her voice was thick with hurt. “I have no intention of abandoning the search for Titania,” she said. “And as for the other thing…If you don't understand how much my mum and dad mean to me, then you don't know me at all.” She began to tremble. “I have enough problems to deal with right now without you making me feel even worse.”

“As do I,” Edric said, a hint of Faerie formality coming into his voice. “The difference between us, Tania, is that my loyalties are clear.” Tania's head spun as she felt a horrible gulf yawn between them. “Where do you want to be?” he asked. “In this cursed place, or in Faerie? You're going to have to make the choice one day. Let me know when you decide.”

He turned and walked quickly away, soon becoming lost in the crowds.

Tania stared after him, feeling quite numb. It was
as if the sky had come crashing down on her and she had been left standing in the smoking rubble of her life.

“Hey!” It was Jade. “Trouble in paradise?”

Tania closed her eyes, fitting the shrapnel of her brain back together again, preparing herself for her best friend's inquisitiveness. She took a deep breath and walked back to the table. She sat down and scooped up her paper cup of Coke. The melting ice rattled as she sucked at the straw.

Jade was watching her intently. “If that was a sample of what being in love is like, count me out!” she said.

“What do you mean?”

“Look at you,” Jade replied. “All grim-faced and angry. I'll tell you what you need, girlfriend! You need some fun. Listen, dump Cedric and play the field for a while. Get a life!”

“I have a life,” Tania said tersely.

A
life? She had
two
lives—that was the problem.

“Oh, really?” Jade persisted. “I've seen you when you think no one is watching. You look like you've got the weight of the whole world on your shoulders. That can't be right. Look, it's the summer holidays in a few days. Get rid of Evan, have some laughs, go wild. Act like you're sixteen for once.”

Tania looked at her without speaking, desperately wishing things were that simple.

“You've got very weird lately, you know,” Jade said, and her voice was uncharacteristically serious. “What
really happened to you while you were missing? Come on, I want the truth.”

“The truth?” Tania said levelly. “Okay. The truth is I went into another world and found out that I'm a Faerie princess.”

Jade gave a snort of laughter. “Good one! And Evan is a prince, I suppose?”

“No, not exactly. But he lives in the Royal Palace.”

Jade gave a curt sweep of her hand. “Fine!” she said. “Forget I asked.”

Tania smiled tiredly. “You see?” she said. “I tell you the truth and you don't believe me.”

School. Monday. Late afternoon. The assembly hall.

“Okay, that went well on the whole. But I want you to keep working on those lines, and think about the meaning of the words. A few of you are still spouting Shakespeare's immortal verse like you're reading the cafeteria lunch menu. Technical rehearsal tomorrow; next rehearsal for the performers is Wednesday after school. No excuses, please. We're coming up to the line now, people, so keep your energy levels up. Okay, off you go. Evan and Anita, I'd like a quick word with the two of you, please.”

Tania wasn't surprised that Mrs. Wiseman wanted to speak to them. Their performances had not been good.

The swing doors flapped shut on the last of the others. Edric and Tania stood slightly too obviously apart, not looking at each other, their body language awkward and wrong.

Mrs. Wiseman was sitting on a chair by the wall, making notes in her play script.

After a few moments of Tania conspicuously not looking at Edric and being very aware that Edric was avoiding looking at her, Mrs. Wiseman lifted her head and gazed from one to the other. “Would you like to tell me what that was all about?” She tapped the script. “I don't remember anything in the stage notes for Act Three, Scene Five, that says Romeo and Juliet can't even stand to look at each other. Quite the opposite, in fact. They're supposed to be madly in love by then. So what went wrong this afternoon?”

Neither of them spoke.

Mrs. Wiseman sighed. “Look, if the two of you have some personal issues to sort out, then go off somewhere else and do it. Fast.”

“I'm sorry,” Edric said. “You're right. I was—”

“We won't let it happen again,” Tania interrupted. “Don't worry about it.”

Mrs. Wiseman's eyes widened in mock surprise. “Worry? Me? With the performance only four days away and half the costumes still to be finished and the scenery not done and my two leading actors doing love scenes as if they're at the wrong end of a bad marriage? Why should I worry? Everything will be fine; we'll make history. It'll be the first production of
Romeo and Juliet
where the two lovers have a fistfight in the final scene.”

“We get the point,” Tania said testily.

“I'm glad to hear it.” Mrs. Wiseman dropped her
eyes to her script again, giving a dismissive wave of her hand. “Wednesday, three thirty. And
try
to act like you're fond of each other.”

Tania walked to the door. She was intensely aware of Edric walking a couple of paces behind her. She felt it the way a stalked animal knows when danger is near; it made her face burn and her stomach harden into a painful knot. It made her clumsy, fumbling at the door handle, wanting more than anything in the world to be out of there, away from Edric—anywhere but right here and right now.

She couldn't understand where all her anger was coming from. It made her want to lash out, and it made her want to curl up in a ball and wallow in the pain.

How could Edric not understand how difficult this was for her, torn between this world and the demands of her Faerie heritage?

Neither of them spoke as they walked down the corridor.

If only he'd say something; take back what he had said, apologize for doubting her. She ignored the small voice in her head:
You should speak first.

No! Never! He hurt me. He has to make the first move.

She came into the entrance lobby with its colorful murals and crowded bulletin boards. Beyond the glass doors she could see the teachers' parking lot, almost empty now, and beyond that, the main gates. Her dad's car was parked at the curb. She knew Edric would go out of one of the side exits to avoid him. But there was still time to put this right.

She stopped in the middle of the lobby, not turning, but waiting for him to catch up with her. Giving him the opportunity to speak.

A chasm of absolute silence yawned behind her. At last she couldn't stand it anymore. She spun on her heel.

He was gone.

Okay, be like that. I don't care
. She shoved her way through the doors and ran across the parking lot, unshed tears burning behind her eyes.

I don't care!

 

For long stretches over the next twenty-four hours, Tania kept her phone switched off so Edric couldn't contact her. Then she would relent and turn it on, hoping desperately for messages from him. There were never any. Her moods swung from misery and despair to a kind of crazy euphoria. Good riddance to him and to everything to do with him. She was better off without all that stuff. She owed them
nothing
. Hadn't she already done enough? She'd brought back the sunshine into Faerie—she'd ended the Long Twilight, or whatever they called it. What more did they expect from her? Let someone else find Titania.

On top of that, she longed to feel safe from Gabriel Drake. She was haunted by thoughts of him; her head filled with vivid memories of his silky, evil voice and of his deadly shining eyes. And a new thought came to her in her moments of desolation: If she turned her back on Faerie—on Oberon and Edric and her sisters
and on the quest for Titania—then maybe she'd finally be rid of Gabriel as well. Free of him and of Faerie and of everything that was causing her all this torment and pain.

But then there were the times when she longed to be in Edric's arms, to tell him how frightened and confused she was, to have him say something that would make everything right again.

 

She managed to avoid seeing Edric all day at school on Tuesday. It was a relief, but it was agonizing as well. These emotional swings were almost becoming a normal part of her now; it was hard for her to remember when she last felt complete and content within her own skin.

School was over, and she and Jade were heading for the exit with a bunch of other people when suddenly Edric appeared around a corner ahead. Tania felt herself tensing up. She avoided eye contact as they approached each other. Some people barged past and Edric bumped against her. She didn't glance at him, didn't even acknowledge him.

“Hmmm,” Jade said. “That was interesting.”

“What was?”

“Oh, nothing. So, no rehearsals with lover boy today?”

“Tomorrow,” Tania said, tight-lipped.

Jade peered into her face as they walked along the corridor. “Getting on okay, are you—you and Cedric?”

“Fine and dandy,” Tania said in a flat voice, using one of her father's expressions.
Fine and dandy.

“Well, that's good, then. Is that why you're so cheerful, little Miss Sunshine and Lollipops?”

“I'm perfectly okay, thanks,” Tania said.

“I don't think so,” Jade said. “In fact, I think it's time for Nurse Jade to prescribe a cure.” She linked her arm with Tania's. “And I've had a brilliant idea. You're coming with Mum and Dad and me to Florida.”

“Good plan, Jade,” Tania said, deadpan. “Are you going to check me in with the luggage, or were you planning on squeezing me into your backpack and stuffing me in the overhead bin?”

“Okay, that was very sarcastic,” Jade said, “but you've been under a big emotional strain recently, so I forgive you.” She squeezed Tania's arm. “Now listen to how this is going to work. Dan called from uni last night. He's finally made up his mind to go with his pals on some kind of spiritual trek across India. I think he wants to sit in the lotus position on a mountaintop and play finger-cymbals or something equally bizarre. The point is, we now have a spare ticket for the flight and a spare bed in the apartment, all booked and paid for. My folks said it would be totally cool for you to come with us.” She looked at Tania. “What do you say? Is that the answer to all your prayers or what? Am I the best pal you've ever had in the entire world ever? Answer the last question first.”

Tania had come to a stunned halt in the middle of the corridor. “Florida?” she said, gasping.

“Yes. You'll get away from all your problems and have some top-of-the-range fun with a flat-out party girl.” Jade peered at her and then frowned. “Oh, come on, you don't need to take a vote on it!” she said. “This is a once-in-a-lifetime offer.”

“I'll have to ask my mum and dad,” Tania said dazedly. “They're expecting me to go to Cornwall with them.”

“Hmmm.” Jade tapped her lips with an extended finger. “Let me see. Cornwall with your folks or Florida with me? Which sounds like more fun?”

Tania had to laugh. “I'll talk to them this evening,” she said.

“Do that,” said Jade. “But don't kid yourself, girl. You
are
coming to Florida with me, and that's final.”

 

“Are you sure you're okay with this?” Tania asked, looking from her mother to her father and back again. They had accepted the idea of her going to Florida with the Andersons so easily that it had taken her by surprise.

“If that's what you'd like to do, then we're fine with it,” her mother said. She raised a finger. “In principle, that is,” she added. “We'll need to have a chat with Tony and Miranda and iron out all the details, but I think you'd be completely barmy not to take them up on their offer.”

They were in the kitchen with their used dinner plates in front of them. Tania had left it till after the meal before she had launched the idea, in case it went down badly.

“I'll give Miranda a ring right now,” Mrs. Palmer said, getting up. “I know Jade told you they don't expect you to pay for the trip, but we're certainly going to give them something for the flight and for your keep.” She raised her eyebrows. “Dan has decided he wants to be an Indian mystic, has he?”

“Something like that,” Tania said.

“Strange boy,” she said as she headed for the living room. “Still, Tony and Miranda must be pleased he's finally settled on a career path.”

Tania looked at her father. “
Are
you okay with this?” she asked quietly.

He took a long breath. “Not entirely,” he said. “But I'm not going to stop you.” His face became stern. “But remember, we're trusting you to behave responsibly. You can't go wild just because you're on the other side of the Atlantic.”

Tania lowered her head. “I won't.”

“See that you don't.”

A tense silence descended. Tania got up and began to clear the table.

A couple of minutes later her mother came back into the kitchen. “Well, Miranda seems perfectly happy,” she said. She looked at Tania. “You realize we're heading off to Cornwall on Monday, don't you? That means a night
here on your own.” She smiled. “Are you sure you can be trusted to behave yourself and not throw a wild party the moment we leave the house?”

Tania glanced uneasily at her father. His face was concerned, but he didn't say anything.

“I promise to behave myself,” Tania said. “And it's only half a night, anyway. Jade's parents are coming over to pick me up at four in the morning.”

She shooed her parents out of the kitchen and filled the dishwasher. She felt as if a big load had been lifted off her. Next Tuesday she'd be getting on a plane and flying away from all her troubles for two sun-soaked weeks of fun and chaos with Jade. It was exactly what she wanted: a chance to clear her brain, to forget all about Queen Titania and Faerie and everything that went with it. The chance to get far away from the fear that Gabriel Drake was going to reach across the worlds and drag her to her doom.

But it would also be two weeks without Edric.

She slammed the dishwasher closed and set the program. She leaned over the worktop, her hands spread on the surface, her head down. Two weeks without Edric.

I won't miss him. I won't even think about him.

She ran upstairs to call Jade. Her friend would have plenty to say—plenty of plans to make—and with Jade's voice buzzing in her head, she wouldn't have any room to think about Edric.

She threw herself across the bed and grabbed up
her canvas shoulder bag, foraging around in it for her phone.

Her fingers made contact with something unexpected, something small and rounded and silky.

Puzzled, she sat up, pulling the bag into her lap and opening the flap.

“Oh!” She lifted the thing out. It was a white rose on a long thornless stem. “Beautiful,” she murmured, holding the curled satiny petals to her nose and sniffing. Her eyes widened. The rose smelled of Faerie.

“Edric!”

He must have slipped it into her bag when he had bumped against her in the corridor.

She heard the double
bleep
of an incoming text. Rolling the rose across her lips and breathing in the enchanting scent, she reached into the bag for her phone.

It was a message from Edric. A single word.
SORRY
.

Tania let out a sigh, her heart melting as she gazed at the screen of her phone, all the anger and hurt and resentfulness draining out of her.

“You idiot!” she murmured under her breath, not sure whether she was referring to herself or to Edric.

Her fingers played over the keypad.

SO AM I
.
SPEAK TOMORROW
.

She pressed
SEND
and rolled onto her back, still holding the rose to her lips.

Sometimes it only took a little thing to make life perfect.

Sometimes all it took was a white rose from Faerie and a one-word text message.

 

It was lunchtime the following day. Tania and Edric were sitting together on a bench in a quiet part of the school grounds.

“How about we promise never to fight again?” Tania said as the two of them dipped plastic forks into a prepacked tub of tuna and sweet corn salad.

“Fine with me,” Edric said.

“That's a deal, then.” She looked at him. “You do know I never intended to stop looking for Titania, don't you?”