Authors: Teegan Loy
Once again, Kira was sitting on his couch.
“I wanted to see how long it took you to get here,” she said.
“Go away,” he muttered.
“Are you done being crabby?”
“No. Every single bone in my body hurts. Things I didn’t know existed hurt,” he whined.
“You want to go out tonight?” she asked. “I’m meeting Pete and the boys at the bar down the block.”
“I can’t even walk,” he whined. “I’m going to sit in the tub and drown myself.”
“What’s happening tomorrow?” she asked.
“Something called skeleton and luge,” he said. “They don’t have a real track here, so I’m just meeting a few guys over at some sliding hill. After that, I’m heading back to the rink to interview some ice skaters. Tomorrow night, I’m going to interview some curling team. I don’t even know what the hell curling is. I should do some research, but my editor thinks it’s hilarious that I go into these interviews with no knowledge. My journalism professor would be horrified.”
Kira snickered and started the bath water. She dumped in some bubble soap and swished the water around.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Kira said. “Call me if you change your mind about going out.”
Cody sighed and told her he was sorry for being such a pain in the ass. He tried to give her a hug, but his arms protested, and he ended up giving her a lame chest bump. He shut the bathroom door, disrobed, and climbed into the steaming water. The chill that had settled in his bones started to melt. These winter sports were going to turn him into a Popsicle.
It had been an interesting day. One he never wanted to relive again, unless he could tweak it a little. If he could rewind, he’d stop when he was naked on the couch with Shane kneeling in front of him.
His cock stirred, and he dipped his hands under the water, sliding them down his chest. His fingers skated by his cock and he fondled his balls until his back arched into his touch.
“Ow, fuck,” Cody groaned as his muscles protested the movement. His head lolled against the side of the tub, and the image of Shane’s brown eyes staring at him woke his cock up. Fuck the pain. He needed to exercise his imagination.
Cody closed his eyes and let his dirty mind loose. He wasn’t going to mess around anymore. Images floated through his head of those brown eyes blown with lust looking up at him as Shane’s lips wrapped around Cody’s cock.
“Oh fuck, that’s good,” Cody moaned. He had a wonderful imagination. His fingers wound into Shane’s hair so he could control the movement of his head, verbally commanding him to suck harder.
Water splashed out of the tub, and he gripped his cock tightly, sliding his hand up and down his shaft. Harder and harder until that familiar burn was building in his belly, wrapping around his spine. He wasn’t going to last much longer, and truthfully, his wrist had started to ache. Cody’s muscles contracted, and he screamed as he came all over his hand. It was one of the most painful and satisfying selfpleasuring sessions he’d ever had in his life. He wiped his hand on a towel.
“Shit, that hurt,” Cody mumbled and slipped under the water, surfacing when his lungs protested the lack of oxygen.
It took him forever to climb out of the tub. Drying his back was more work than it was worth. He considered going to bed wrapped in his towel. He finally managed to get into his underwear and slide into his bed.
His dreams were filled with disturbing accidents involving winter sports. He fell off a ski lift, got hit in the balls with a puck, and almost froze to death in the stands watching someone shoot at a target with a noisy gun.
The ringing of a phone saved him from flying down a huge mountain on a giant skateboard without wheels.
“Uh,” he grunted into the phone.
“Wake up, my sexy little snow bunny,” Kira said sweetly.
“Fuck off,” Cody said. He was too tired and achy to think of a clever comeback.
“Is that the best you’ve got?” she asked.
Cody grunted again. “What do you want?”
“I’m in the hall, banging on your door. I forgot my key. We’re going to be late if you don’t get your ass out of bed.”
“I don’t think I can move,” he whined. Plus his dick was hard, which really didn’t make any sense because he had been dreaming about being maimed. He pressed on his dick and tried to get the big guy to relax.
Kira screamed into his phone, threatening to break down the door if he didn’t open it immediately. Cody jumped out of bed and hobbled as fast as he could. He opened his door just as Shane and his roommates walked by his apartment. They were all clutching brooms and wearing tight black pants that highlighted all Shane’s assets. What the fuck? Were they a cleaning crew who mixed in a little entertainment while sweeping the kitchen floor for their clients?
Kira elbowed Cody, and he snapped his mouth shut, swiping his finger across his chin to check for drool. Thankfully, his face was spit free. Shane smirked, and Cody would swear on anything that Shane was staring at his hard-on.
“Er, good morning,” Cody said politely, trying to pretend he wasn’t standing in his doorway half-naked with his dick fighting to break out of his underwear.
“We’d love to stay and hang out with you guys, but if we don’t get moving, we’ll be late,” Pete said. Both Kira and Cody watched the boys walk away. It was a nice view.
“Jeesh, Cody,” Kira said, elbowing him in the side.
“What? I just woke up,” he said, frowning. “It’s a guy thing.” Kira rolled her eyes and shoved him back into the apartment.
“You could have put on a robe.”
“I didn’t have time. You threatened my door with grave injury if I didn’t open it. I didn’t know Shane and his entourage would be out there.”
“Here,” she said, and thrust a package into his face. “One of your coworkers dropped this off.”
The envelope was thin. Cody crossed his fingers and hoped he had been reassigned. A slinky, skintight outfit dropped to the floor along with a note.
“Could you…?” Cody pointed. There was no way he could bend over and stand up again. That was asking way too much of his muscles.
Kira giggled and then started laughing. “This is your outfit for skeleton and luge.”
“Well, fuck!” he shouted. “All these winter athletes are psychotic. I mean, who goes outside prancing around in this shit? Where are the warm fluffy coats and mittens and hats? This is not what a sane person wears to play in the snow.”
“Are you done?”
“Yes.” He scowled.
Kira tossed the suit into his face, and he stomped to the bathroom. He might as well just wear his underwear. It had already been established during cross-country skiing that his underwear was warmer than all these outfits.
There was coffee brewing when he stalked into the kitchen with his body encased in stretchy material. Kira adjusted her face, clenching her jaw before she handed him a steaming cup of coffee.
“Don’t say a thing,” he grunted and tugged on the crotch. How did these athletes wear these outfits every day? His balls were being crushed, and his dick wasn’t happy at all about being pasted to the inside of his thigh again.
“Let’s go,” she said, holding his jacket in front of his face.
Cody quickly slipped on a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt before he put on his jacket and mittens. He complained the entire drive to the hill, adjusting and readjusting himself. Kira was busy biting the inside of her cheek.
When Cody got out of the car and shut the door, he could hear Kira laughing. It followed him all the way to the little warming house on the top of a hill, which now looked more like a giant mountain.
The door swung open and several guys all dressed in the uni-tight thing stepped outside.
“Are you Cody?” one asked.
“Yes,” he said, trying to sound cheerful. He took off his gloves and shook their hands. “Let’s go inside and do the interview first,” Cody said. He was already freezing to death.
They did the introductions quickly. Kevin and Andrew competed in the luge as a doubles team. Cody stared at the tiny sled and wondered how two men could fit on that thing. When they demonstrated, Cody got hot all over. One guy was flat on his back with the other guy laid out on top of him. How could they even think in that position? Cody knew what he would be thinking about, and it certainly wouldn’t be steering some sled down a giant slide made of ice. He’d crash on the first turn and probably break his dick or shatter his balls. He shuddered.
Davis competed in skeleton. They used the same track as luge, but instead of lying on your back, you went face-first down the track. It made it easier to see.
“See what?” Cody asked. “The wall meeting your face?”
The guys all laughed and then launched into detailed descriptions of various accidents they’d all had while practicing and racing. It sounded horrible.
“Why don’t you wear padding?” Cody asked.
“Speed, dude. We don’t want anything to slow us down,” Davis said. The guys all high-fived each other. “You ready to hit the hill?”
“Um,” Cody hesitated, but Kevin slapped a large helmet on his head and led him out into the cold.
They had set up a short course on the hill using plastic orange cones. Cody stared down to the bottom. In reality, it was a kid’s sliding hill, but in his mind, it looked like a straight drop to hell. He protested several times, but it didn’t work. The guys set him on the sled, showed him how to lie down when he was on the course, and how to use his body to steer the sled.
“Do you want one of us to ride with you?” Kevin asked.
Cody coughed. He didn’t need to sit on top of some fit guy, nor did he need someone on top of him. His dick would probably get the wrong idea and this was embarrassing enough.
“Nope,” Cody said, straightening his back. “I’ll go solo.”
He had been sledding before, so this shouldn’t be that hard to manage. Besides, the course was snow and not solid ice. The sled probably wouldn’t go that fast. Who was he kidding? The sled was probably going to go a hundred miles per hour.
They all banged on his helmet, rattling his brain. Kevin let him wear some cool gloves with spikes on the fingers. He needed to remember not to stab any vital parts with those metal needles.
They gave him some last minute instructions he couldn’t hear because of the helmet. He took a deep breath and was suddenly hurtling down the hill. The sled seemed to have a mind of its own, flying straight down the hill and sending those orange cones sailing in every direction. Cody figured he wasn’t supposed to knock them all over. He couldn’t see anything because he was shoving his feet in the snow, trying to stop his runaway sled before he hit the bump at the bottom of the hill. The sled wasn’t slowing down, and suddenly he was airborne. He landed on his back and the sled dropped a few feet away from him.
“Holy shit,” Kevin shouted from the top of the mountain. “That was awesome. You got some serious air.”
All Cody could do was moan. There was no way he was going to try to do the skeleton thing. The guys soon surrounded him, checking to make sure all his parts were still attached to his body.
“Man, you’ve got balls,” Davis said. “Most people would have bailed before they hit that ridge.”
Cody moaned again and tried to sit up. His ass ached. He could hear Kira at the top of the hill, laughing her head off. When he looked up, he saw her waving and pointing to her right. Derek the stupid photographer had appeared again to capture all his failings.
“Oh fuck,” Cody groaned.
The guys were great and set him on the sled, using it like a gurney to haul him back up the hill. The click, click of the camera echoed down the mountain.
“See you at the rink, Cody,” Derek said, grinning. “Let me know if you want copies of the pics.”
“I hate you,” Cody said in his most threatening tone.
Derek blew him a kiss and patted his camera.
“Come on, sweetie,” Kira said. “You have to be at the rink in an hour.”
Cody tried to protest, but all that came out of his mouth was a grunt. The crazy sledding guys waved at him and went flying down the hill. They all made it seem easy. Their sleds followed directions, and they made it down the hill, barely kicking up any snow.
The car was toasty warm and Kira laid the seat back for him. It made him feel a tiny bit better.
The trip to the next interview was too short, and before he knew it, Kira was dragging him into another freezing ice rink. He kept reminding himself it was better to be inside than on some mountain, knee-deep in snow.
Some guy directed them down a dark tunnel and into a small room where his costume was hanging on a hook. Cody had expected sparkles, but it was just black stretchy pants and a black shirt. It was probably skintight, but at least he wouldn’t glow in the dark.
“I don’t know if I can do this,” Cody said. “Everything hurts right now. I’m one gigantic bruise.”
“It’s almost over,” Kira said.
“I suppose you’re right.” Cody sighed and sat down. “Help me get out of this spandex.”
Kira had to do everything from helping with his socks to buttoning his shirt. She even laced up his skates.
“You have a very nice ass,” she said, patting him.
“Wish someone else would notice,” Cody grumbled.
“I promise I’ll find out about Shane,” she said. “Or you could just ask him out.”
“You went out with them last night,” Cody whined.
“Shane didn’t go. It was just Pete and me, and we didn’t really talk a lot.” She waggled her eyebrows.
Cody was about to swear at her when someone knocked on the door, telling him it was time to interview the skaters.
“Let’s get this done,” he said with a determined look on his face.
Derek was leaning over the glass, waving at him. Cody heard the camera click when he stepped on the ice still wearing skate guards. Not a particularly smart idea. He sat down hard and earned a round of applause.
A guy in tight pants bent down and helped him get the guards off his blades. Maybe he should have left the guards on, because he didn’t do much better with the blades.
The hockey skates had been a nightmare, but these stupid figure skates were worse. Those jagged teeth things called a toe pick kept tripping him up and sending him to his knees. Apparently they helped you launch your body into the air when jumping. Not something Cody would be attempting any time soon.
Derek took more pictures of Cody sliding across the ice on his ass, his face, and his side. He finally managed to stay upright by draping himself over the boards and hanging on tightly.
“At least with hockey, I had a stick,” Cody muttered.
“Can a hockey player do this?” a skater shouted, and threw his body into the air, spinning several times, and then landing lightly on one foot. The guy was clearly insane. How did you even learn to do that without splitting your head wide open?
“I’m Brian, the next Olympic champion,” the guy said as he came to a quick stop, spraying Cody with snow.