The Mighty Quinns: Ryan (14 page)

“I don’t remember a time when my parents loved each other. My first memories were of them fighting. Oh, and they
fought.
Crazy, plate-throwing fights. I can’t imagine now what they were about. I was just six when they divorced. There was a huge custody battle that I read about later when I was in high school, but at the time, I was unaware of how bad it really was.”

He slipped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. “I’m sorry.”

Serena shrugged. “I think that’s what led me to acting. I used to do a lot of pretending when I was younger. It was an easy escape. And I was always so much happier when I was pretending to be someone else.”

“Where are they now?”

“My father lives in London with his mistress. He’s on his fourth wife and he’s cheating on her. My mother married an earl and lives in this huge country house. She has horses and raises prizewinning roses. And finds her husband terribly dull. So every couple of months, she jets off to Italy and stays with her boyfriend, Raoul, who is twenty years younger and fond of custom-made suits, which she buys him.”

He took her hand and they hiked down to the beach. “You seem to be well-adjusted, considering all of that.”

“Now I am,” she said. “It took me years to straighten myself out. And I’m lucky I did. Things could have ended badly for me.”

“What made the difference?”

“My first big film premiered in London, and they both came to see it and to celebrate with me. They got pissed and they each ended up crying on my shoulder. It turns out they’re still in love with each other.”

“Did you tell them?”

“God, no,” Serena said. “My life is finally peaceful. If they’re going to find each other again, they’re going to have to do it on their own. But I realized how powerful love can be. It can raise you up to the highest heights or it can dash you on the rocks until you’re in a million pieces.”

When they got to the beach, Ryan slipped out of his backpack and unhitched his tent. He dumped the contents of the sack onto the hard-packed sand and began to sort through it. Serena squatted beside him, arranging the poles by length.

“I should thank you for saving me from a very big mistake,” she said.

“Ben?”

Serena nodded. “I don’t know what I was thinking. I guess I don’t have any example to follow. I’ve never seen a happy marriage. I’m not sure what love looks like. I guess I believed the stability of marriage would be enough.”

“When you explained it to me at the pool, I understood why you’d want that kind of arrangement, and you seemed to be going into it with your eyes wide open. But I’m glad you didn’t go through with it in the end,” Ryan said.

“Me, too.” She drew a deep breath. “Are we going to put this tent together?”

Ryan showed her how to fit the pieces of the frame into the pockets on the tent until they had a cozy little shelter.

“Look at that.” She marveled. “It just popped right up. Can I go inside?”

“Sure,” he said. “Unzip the flap on that side. And kick off your shoes. No sand in the tent. It’s very abrasive on naked skin.”

“We’re going to get
naked
inside this tent?” she teased.

“I’m leaving the option open,” he said.

Serena crawled inside and lay down on her back. Ryan did the same and they stared up at the ceiling. He’d never had a woman in his tent. “What do you think?”

“What happens if it rains?”

“It’s waterproof.”

“Or the wind blows?”

“I’ve slept in this tent in the middle of a monsoon.”

“Is this the tent you’ll take to Everest?”

Ryan shook his head. “I have six or seven tents. This is my general-purpose abode. My high-altitude tent is smaller and lower to the ground. It’s more wind resistant.”

A silence descended over the tent. He turned to look at her. “What is it? What has you worried?”

“If your father died on Everest, aren’t you afraid that might happen to you?”

“I probably won’t go up the mountain. I don’t really want to remember my father that way. The plan is for me to help Dana at base camp.”

She reached out and grabbed his hand, lacing his fingers through hers. It was such a simple gesture, but he always felt better when they were touching. Contact with her was like breathing. It made him feel alive.

Ryan rolled over on his side and slipped his hand around her waist. “I’m glad you’re here,” he said. “It doesn’t seem to matter how much time we spend together. I always want more.”

“Me, too,” she said. “Sooner or later we’re going to have to go our separate ways, though. We can’t be attached at the hip 24/7.”

“Why not? You look very nice on my hip.”

“We lead very different lives, you and I. Under normal circumstances, we’d never have met.”

“Probably not,” Ryan agreed.

“Maybe it was fate. Or destiny. That’s kind of a Hollywood story. I never really believed in it. But now I do,” she said. “There’s no other explanation.”

“If I hadn’t guided that Mont Blanc trip, I wouldn’t have met Perry. And he wouldn’t have hired me to go to Fiji with you, and we wouldn’t be lying here right now.”

“I guess we’re lucky,” Serena murmured. She pushed up on her elbow and leaned over him, brushing a soft, tantalizing kiss across his lips.

Ryan reached for her and furrowed his hands through the hair at her nape, pulling her into another kiss, this one deeper and more demanding. Their bodies fell against each other, fitting almost perfectly, as if fate had made them that way.

They’d grown to know each other well, to seek the spots that made each of them ache with desire, to move with the ebb and flow of seduction, first, one taking control and then ceding it to the other. They quickly undressed until they were both naked. Ryan pulled her beneath him, then slowly entered her, impatient to feel her warmth surround him.

There were times when they took things slowly and other times when their encounter was quick and desperate. This one would be slow, tender. As he moved above her, he took in the tiny details of her face, committing them to memory, etching them in his mind.

He’d had many women in his life, some that he’d never thought about again. That wouldn’t be the case with Serena. No matter what happened between them, she would always be the woman he could never forget.

That might be a curse, but Ryan wanted to believe it was a blessing. They could have a future together. As he brought her to her peak, he could taste the words on his lips. He fought the impulse to say them. He was sure they were true, but until she dealt with her other life, they’d never be real. He would wait for a sign and then Ryan would tell her exactly what was in his heart.

8

T
HEY
SPENT
THE
next two days in Northland, a windswept spit of land in the northernmost part of New Zealand. They hiked along deserted beaches and camped in secluded coves. It was a chance to learn more about each other and to discover what Ryan had always known—they were perfectly compatible.

He realized that this was what had drawn Mal to Amy, and Rogan to Claudia. This easy, effortless companionship. He couldn’t imagine wanting to be with anyone else. And yet he knew that the clock was ticking. Though she hadn’t said it, he suspected she was talking herself into returning to L.A.

Part of him hoped that she would just throw it all away. By burning every last bridge, she’d have no choice but to stay with him. And he didn’t want to risk losing her. The idea of living his life without her caused a deep and undeniable ache. Like a hole in his soul. He suddenly understood what his mother had gone through, losing the man she’d loved in such a tragic way. And he also understood why she remained alone. Sometimes there was just one perfect match. For Ryan, it was Serena.

And yet his rational side kept reminding him that he’d have to let her go eventually. But not now. They still had a few days to enjoy the fantasy.

“Are you sad to be going back?” she asked.

They sat in a small café in Russell, a village that overlooked the Bay of Islands. They’d packed up their campsite at dawn and driven into town for brekkie. Soon they’d take the ferry across the bay to the highway and south to Raglan. They had a five-hour drive home in front of them, but Ryan had decided they’d take their time and stop along the way.

“I am,” he said. “I wish I didn’t have a meeting, but Mal says it’s important. Some big client from England. He wanted us all there.”

“My bridesmaids would have left Fiji by now.”

“Fiji seems like another lifetime,” he said.

“L.A. seems like lifetimes ago,” she countered. “I don’t even know how I lasted that long.”

“There must have been something good about it,” Ryan said.

“I enjoyed the work,” she said. “I loved becoming someone else. And those moments when I’d lose myself in my character. All my problems would just disappear and I’d get to live someone else’s life for a few minutes. It was everything that came with being a celebrity that was so hard to take.”

Ryan grabbed his coffee and took a sip. He’d tried to bury his doubts deep over the past few days. But now that they were heading home, they’d bubbled to the surface again.

She was a good actress, that much he knew. And she could play a part with amazing ease. Was that what she was doing now? Had she convinced herself that this character, Elly Sheridan, was the person she wanted to be? And how long would she be willing to continue the charade, if it was a charade?

Ryan wanted to believe they were meant to be together, but he still couldn’t put aside his last bit of doubt. It was as if he were on a roller coaster, up and down, certainty and doubt, back and forth until he wasn’t sure what he felt.

“I think I’m going to have to watch your movies,” he said.

“I can’t believe you haven’t seen one. I’m a bit insulted.”

“I don’t have a television,” he said.

“You can watch movies on your computer. On your phone.”

“I’m usually in spots without internet service.”

“That’s no excuse.”

“All right,” he said. “If I have to watch one movie, which one should I watch?”

“Oh, that’s a hard question,” she said. “If you—”

“Are you Serena Hightower?”

Ryan glanced up to see a teenage girl standing next to their table. He held his breath, wondering what Serena would say and how she’d react. Serena closed her eyes and drew a deep breath. “I was,” she finally said.

“Mom!” The girl motioned to her family. “I told you it was her.”

The family of four approached the table, and Serena pasted a smile on her face. She pulled her hand from beneath Ryan’s and stood. He cursed inwardly, silently observing the scene unfolding in front of him.

“You look so different,” the girl said. “I barely recognized you. What are you doing here?”

“Just taking a short holiday,” Serena said.

“So are we!” the girl said. “We’re from Seattle. I’m Becky and this is my mom, Ruth, and my dad, Harold. And my little sister, Katherine. Can we get a picture? My friends won’t believe I met you. They don’t even know where New Zealand is.”

“Sure,” Serena said.

They moved over to a barrel filled with flowers, and Serena dutifully stood in the center of the group and smiled as a waitress took the photo. After that it was a free-for-all as other patrons begged for a photo or an autograph.

Twenty minutes later, Serena returned to the table. “Let’s get out of here,” she murmured, “before someone else comes along.” She glanced down at her uneaten meal and grabbed the scone she’d ordered.

“I paid the bill,” Ryan said. He walked with her to the Range Rover and helped her inside, then got behind the wheel. “Are you all right?”

Serena nodded. “I guess I assumed I wouldn’t run into fans in the middle of nowhere.” She turned to him. “Those photos will probably already be all over social media. The entertainment shows will pick them up by the end of the day, and they’ll spin the story in every direction. What am I doing in New Zealand? Who was the man I was with? What’s happening with my wedding? Ryan, I think I just ran out of time.”

Ryan noticed a woman approaching the car with a camera. He quickly started the engine and pulled away from the restaurant. When he glanced over at Serena, he saw tears swimming in her eyes. He felt a sharp ache in his chest as regret welled up inside of him.

“Hey, don’t cry. We’re fine.”

“No,” she said. “We’re not. I’m not.”

He drove toward the ferry landing, then parked the car along the side of the road. Reaching over, he pulled her into his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. She cried for a long time, curling up in the seat when he had to drive the Range Rover onto the ferry.

When her tears had finally stopped, he helped her out of the car and they walked to the bow of the boat, where they stood at the rail as the ferry skimmed over the bay. Her dark hair blew in the breeze, and Ryan reached out and dried an errant tear from her cheek.

“Yesterday I was remembering one of my favorite movies. It’s called
Roman Holiday
. Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck.”

Ryan shrugged. “It’s a good movie?”

“One of the best. In fact, Thom is thinking of doing a remake and they’ve been talking to my agent. I even have the haircut for it now.”

“Do you want to do the movie?” he asked.

“No. I mean, sure, it would be a great role, but I would never want to try to top Audrey.” She paused, staring out at the water. “It’s a story about a princess who escapes the bonds of her position for a day. She meets a reporter, only she doesn’t know he’s a reporter, and they have this wonderful adventure in Rome. He thinks he’s going to write a story about her, but instead, he falls in love. She falls in love with him, too, and it’s so romantic and wonderful.”

“And she runs off with him?”

“No,” Serena said. “She gives him up. She realizes that she can’t stop being who she was born to be. They were from two different worlds.”

“That’s not us,” he said.

“Isn’t it?”

He pulled her into his arms and held her close. But as they stood on the deck, Ryan found himself watching the people around them, wondering if they recognized her. He wanted to protect her from them all, to shout at the world for privacy.

But this was her world, this place where everyone recognized her and everyone wanted a little piece of her. He didn’t want to share, and yet he knew that she couldn’t just fade into obscurity.

Like the princess in the movies, she’d been born into this life. Her talent and her beauty had destined her for this all along. And he’d been a fool to hope the world would let her go without a fight.

* * *

S
ERENA
OPENED
THE
screen door and called for Ryan. But the cottage was empty. She walked through to the back door and out onto the deck, then down the narrow path to the beach. She found him there, sitting on the sand, his wet suit pulled down to his waist and his surfboard lying next to him.

The wind was high and the waves rushed against the shore. She stood over him, then gave him a gentle bump with her knees. He looked up and grinned. “You should have come down earlier,” he said. “Before the wind picked up, the waves were perfect for you.”

“I’m not sure I can deal with the cold water,” Serena said, sitting down beside him.

“You’ll get used to it. You won’t be able to stay away. That’s the thing about surfing. Once the bug catches you, it won’t let go.” He ran his fingers through his wet hair. “Where have you been?”

“I drove into town. I had a few errands.” She reached into her jacket pocket and pulled out an envelope and handed it to him.

He opened it and sighed. “Auckland to Los Angeles. Tomorrow. 7:15 p.m.”

Serena nodded. “I need to go back before the wedding. It’s just after Christmas. And I’m the one who is going to have to deal with it. I called Thom and told him to expect me.”

“Then you’re going to marry Ben,” Ryan said, the words thick in his throat.

“Oh, God, no!” she cried. Serena laughed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t phrase that well. I’m going to L.A. to call it off as soon as possible. Guests have to cancel their travel plans. My parents are flying in. I’m not sure I can stop that from happening. And Ben and I are going to have to come up with a plausible story to sell to the media. Thom promised that the studio would help with damage control.” She wrapped her arm around Ryan’s shoulders and kissed his cheek. “But I’m coming back.” She pulled out another envelope and he took it from her fingers.

“What is this?” He withdrew the second ticket. “For me?”

Serena nodded, resting her chin on his shoulder. “I know you have to leave to go on your expedition in January. But I was hoping you could come and stay with me while I’m doing the West Coast publicity. And maybe you could come to New York, too? We could have another adventure. It will go so much easier if you were with me. And we could spend the holiday together.” She paused. “I don’t want to go back without you.”

Serena realized it was a long shot. He had responsibilities here. And he’d probably want to spend Christmas with his family. But she couldn’t bear being so far away from him for that much time. “Please?”

“Sure,” Ryan said. “I think I can take some time away. As long as I’m back by the fifth of January, I’ll be able to prep for Kilimanjaro. In fact, I could probably fly out from New York and have Mal take care of the prep here.”

“We could spend New Year’s Eve in New York,” she said.

“Do you always do publicity after the film is released?”

“Thom made an accommodation for me, because of the wedding. I did a lot before I left for Fiji. We started in mid-November. But I have to finish it now. Plus, they want to push the junket into January because of awards season.”

“Does the timing of the junket affect the awards?”

Serena giggled. “You really don’t know anything about movies, do you? The film won’t be eligible until next year. And I don’t think it will get any nominations. It’s a fluffy romantic comedy.”

“Well, I know about you,” he said. Ryan pulled her into his lap and kissed her. “Isn’t that more important than all that other rubbish?”

“It is rubbish, isn’t it?”

“I supposed you’re going to have to help me pack. I have no idea what people wear in Los Angeles. I don’t own a suit.”

“You won’t need a suit. Do you have a sports coat?”

“No, but I’m sure Rogan does. He’s much better with fashion than I am. Plus he spends a lot of time in Sydney now, so he has city clothes. Should I bring a tie?”

“Probably not. If it’s necessary, we’ll just buy you one.”

Ryan stood up and held out his hand to her, pulling her to her feet. Reaching back, he dusted the sand off her skirt. “What time is your meeting?” Serena asked.

“At three this afternoon,” he said. “But if I’m leaving for a week or two, I’m going to have to go in and lay the Kilimanjaro expedition out for Mal and Dana.”

“Do you think they’ll object to you being gone?”

“No,” Ryan said, shaking his head.

Serena breathed a sigh of relief. In truth, she was surprised that he’d agreed to come. But then, Ryan was accustomed to surviving in rough conditions. If he could climb Everest, then he could certainly handle a week in L.A. and another in New York. Maybe she could get him to London on his way back from Kilimanjaro—wherever that was.

“I bought us an early Christmas present today,” she said. “A new bed.”

Ryan blinked in surprise. “You bought a bed?”

“Actually, a whole bedroom. A double bed is kind of small for the two of us, especially when my dogs come. I definitely want more drawers, and your furniture is a bit of a—” She stopped. “Are you all right?”

“Of course,” Ryan said. “I’m just—” He cleared his throat. “If we needed a bed, you should have told me. I could have bought it.”

“But I wanted it to be a gift. I just assumed you’d be all right with it. Your mattress is so lumpy, it’s as if I’m sleeping on rocks.”

“You bought a mattress, too?”

“Yes... Are you angry with me?”

“No,” Ryan said, staring out at the horizon.

She sat next to him, wondering what was going through his head. There were moments when he seemed so far away, and others when she didn’t believe they could get any closer. Had she been wrong to invite him to the United States with her? Was it too soon to ask so much of him? And what was his problem with new furniture for his bedroom?

Serena tried to imagine what it might be like for him, stepping into her world. She recalled what it had been like in Fiji. His impressions about the plane and the house, the limitless bank card. Though her house in Malibu wasn’t grand, it was certainly more posh than Ryan’s cottage. And on tour, there would be limos and restaurants and money being tossed about as if it were confetti at a parade. It was that sort of thing—and Ryan’s reaction to it—that Serena worried about.