Looking back at Christopher, Tiana briefly wondered if her leaving him somehow contributed to his demise. “Damn you,” she muttered under her breath.
“What did I do now?” Christopher opened his eyes.
Tiana was startled by Christopher’s voice. “You’re alive,” she commented.
“I had a boo-boo,” Christopher replied.
“I’m glad you’re okay,” Tiana stood up. “I’ll be leaving now.”
“Tiana, wait,” he called after her, making Tiana pause. “I want us to be a family,” Christopher pleaded, “like old times?”
The revelation made Tiana silently scoffed.
Like old times? Like how you cheated on me left and
right? Like how you almost bankrupted me? What glorious old times are you thinking, fool?
The state of Christopher’s health made her bite her tongue. “What do you need from me,
Christopher?” She didn’t turn around to face him.
“I want to move back home,” he coughed, “I want us back together. The three of us.”
“Why, Christopher?” Tiana finally turned around. “Why? So I can support your drug habits? So you can entertain your groupies? So I can be made a laughing stock again? Why, Christopher?”
“Because I got a second chance at life, TeeTee. I got a second chance at
us
,” Christopher pleaded. “Yeah, I’ll admit I was an asshole. I’ll admit I mistreated you. I’ll admit all of that. But I’m also willing to admit that I believe in second chances and I want you to give me one.”
Christopher wasn’t asking for too much; he was asking for
everything.
If Christopher moved back home, there was no way Tiana could keep a relationship with Kieran. Kieran wouldn’t have any part of it and she couldn’t blame him. It was a decision between what was best for her—and what was best for her son.
Tyson needs his father.
“Okay,” Tiana softly replied. She knew just by uttering that one word, she was making the biggest mistake of her life.
Breaking the news to Kieran was going to be the toughest part.
****
Tiana asked Erin to babysit Tyson so she and Kieran could go out to dinner. She took him to a high-profile restaurant and asked him to dress accordingly. She had a single glass of wine and chewed her food slowly. Her stomach was tightly coiled and no matter how much water she drank, she couldn’t escape the dryness of her throat.
Kieran didn’t pay any attention to what Tiana was doing. He was nervous himself. He wanted to wait until Christmas to propose but decided it was best to do it Christmas Eve. He wanted them to enjoy Tyson’s first Christmas together and let Tiana have her own night. He lightly patted his sweaty forehead and had water instead of any alcoholic beverage. He wanted to remember this night.
“Um…” Tiana quickly swallowed her food and took a sip of wine. She braced herself for Kieran’s reaction. Was he going to be emotionless and respectful? Would he toss a table over and scream obscenities? She could only hope for the former and definitely not the latter. “There is something I do need to talk to you about.”
“Oh?” Kieran felt the ring box chafing his slacks. He was growing increasingly anxious by the minute. “What’s on your mind,
bella
?”
The next few minutes were a blur to Kieran. It seemed everything paused in slow motion as he listened intently to what Tiana said to him. He paid very close attention to her lips.
“I got a call
he was in the hospital…”
All he heard was noise even though he could understand Tiana just fine.
“He begged and cried
for another chance…”
He watched her lips and thought he saw them tremble in nervousness.
“I decided Tyson needed
his father…”
He read her eyes; she was apologetic and remorseful, hoping that he would understand her point of view.
“I want to let you know it wasn’t an easy decision and it wasn’t one I took lightly,” Tiana continued, “but Christopher wants to be a father to Tyson and have another chance at working things out so…” her voice trailed off.
Kieran looked at her, emotionless. His face darkened and he remained silent for a long while. He reached over took a sip of her wine, then finished it. “Thank you,” he got up to leave.
“Kieran,” Tiana called out after him, “I would like for us to still be friends?”
The admission caused Kieran to stop walking. He rubbed his mouth in frustration, unbelievable that his ex had the audacity to ask such a request. He turned around. “That’s what you would like? You would like us to be friends?”
Tiana nodded. “I would.”
Kieran walked back to her and looked down at her with an icy glare. “You know what I would like, Tiana? I would’ve liked to have been your husband. I would’ve liked to have been a father to Tyson and possibly adopt him. I knew from the moment I met you, I was in love with you. I knew it right then and there. And I broke a rule getting involved with you. I broke the only rule I have ever followed and that is not to get too involved with a client and their family.
“You do what makes you happy, Tiana.” He reached inside his pocket and pulled out a ring box.
He opened it up and set it down in front of her. In front of Tiana was a sparkling two-carat diamond solitaire ring. “This was going to be yours tonight. I wasn’t satisfied with just being your boyfriend and I wanted more. Maybe you did me a favor.” Kieran kissed her forehead. “But us being friends? If I can’t be your husband, I most certainly won’t be your friend. You can keep the ring.” He then left the restaurant.
FIFTEEN
“So have you heard from Kieran lately?” Rocio asked over lunch.
Tiana shook her head. She wished she heard from him. The same night she broke up with Kieran, he packed up his belongings and slept in the guest house. By the next morning, he was gone. She called him so he could get his last paycheck from her but he never replied. Instead, his assistant called her back to let Tiana know she could mail the check to the office. The memory made Tiana’s heart crumble. Kieran was so heartbroken, he didn’t even want to
speak
to her.
She found herself visiting the Fits and Giggles website on a semi-hourly basis just to see his picture. Tyson’s first Christmas was somber and Tiana barely remembered New Years. It was already time for Erin’s January wedding.
“So the best thing that’s ever happened to you walked out the door because the worst thing that’s ever happened to you wanted a second chance?” Erin asked. “Is that what I’m understanding?”
“You don’t understand my situation, Erin,” Tiana replied, “unless you’ve been in it, you can’t understand it.”
“One has nothing to do with the other,” Erin replied, “the only reason why you’re giving Christopher a second chance is because you found him in a drunk and drugged-out state. Had you not found him like that, you would have
never
given him the time of day again.”
“Christopher was in a state where he needed me and Tyson. I did what had to be done,” Tiana said.
“Yes, because being Champagne Cris’s wife has more privilege than being the wife of a child daycare owner,” Erin sharply replied, “I totally get it.”
The admission caused an air of tension between the best friends. “I don’t know why I even try to make you understand, because you simply don’t get it.” Tiana quietly replied.
“Then help me understand?” Erin asked. “What is it that I don’t get? Is it the part that he left you alone to raise Tyson? Is it the part he demanded millions of your fortune but said nothing about seeing his son? Is it the part he tried to weasel his way back to you through your mother? Is it the part he cheated on you left and right before
and
during your marriage? What part of it don’t I understand, TeeTee? Please? Because I’m curious!”
“My son’s father wants a second chance to make it right for him, for our son, for all of us! Yes, I think Christopher was a shit father and an equally shit husband! Yes, I wish he had turned around before the divorce and legal battles.” Tiana stood up for her actions. “And you’re damn straight, I wish Christopher had made an effort long before Kieran came into the picture! But he didn’t! I did what was best for my son and all involved.”
“No, you did what was best for Tiana and
no one
involved,” Erin folded her arms. “You don’t give a goddamn about anyone but Tiana. You would rather stay in a loveless and lonely marriage than admit you have a dog husband. You would rather have your parents beat you down than grow some balls and tell them to mind their own damn business. You are the
queen
of keeping up appearances and you learned that from your mother. Now, you had a man who accepted you as you are, didn’t try to change you, loved and took care of your son as if he was his own, and you left him to give your shit ex another chance because you thought that was the best course of action? Girl, bye!” Erin got out her car keys. “I’m going home because I don’t want to be around this train wreck anymore. My wedding is on Saturday and the rehearsal is on Friday. I’ll see you then.” She then left.
A small silence passed between Tiana and Rocio. “You know she has a point, TeeTee,” Rocio quietly spoke.
Tiana sipped her water and let out an angry breath. “So both of my best friends think I’m an idiot? Great.”
“TeeTee, we saw how happy you were with Kieran. We haven’t seen you that happy in a long time,” Rocio reached over and grabbed Tiana’s hand, “you know I will support you no matter what happens. But I’m not going to lie, TeeTee. I think you made a big mistake.”
“Well, what’s done is done,” Tiana replied, “What’s done is done.”
“Speaking of Christopher, where is he?” Rocio asked. “I haven’t seen him around lately.”
“He’s been busy,” Tiana replied. That was the canned response she gave anyone who had asked.
Truth was shortly after Christopher came home from the hospital, he took off to New York to supposedly work on an album. He borrowed money from Barbara for studio time and made frequent trips between California, New York, and Miami. He was currently at home watching Tyson before he had to catch another flight the next day.
“Busy, huh?” Rocio smirked. “I’m not even going to comment.”
“So, don’t.” Tiana sharply replied. She took a sip of water and played with her salad. “He’s at home watching Tyson and he’s making a better effort than he was the last time around.”
“Well, I guess anything is a step-up from absolutely nothing,” Rocio smiled.
After the lunch, Rocio and Tiana drove back to Tiana’s house to finish up the final details of Erin’s wedding. They pulled up to Tiana’s home and saw an unfamiliar car in the driveway.
“Expecting somebody?” Rocio asked.
“I have no idea who the hell that is,” Tiana parked her car and got out of it. She entered her home. “Christopher? Cris?”
“Hello?” A young woman holding Tyson greeted Tiana.
Tiana walked over and snatched Tyson out of her hands. “And who are you?”
The young woman smiled at Tiana with a hand out; Tiana didn’t return the courtesy. “I’m Tanya.”
“That’s nice, but, who the hell are you?” Rocio interrupted.
“I’m a friend of Cris’!” She giggled. “He let me watch the baby while he was gone.”
“How long has he been gone?” Tiana asked.
“Only a few hours!”
Tiana’s eyes grew wide. “A few hours?” She left for the final bridal fitting that morning and Cristopher was just waking up.
“Just a few! He said he’ll be back soon, though.” Tanya grabbed her purse. “I guess you’re the one who’s going to pay me? Cris said you were going to handle it when you came back.”
“I’m going to handle something, all right,” Tiana folded her arms, “If you don’t get out of my house and out of my face within the next five seconds, I will hand you your ass on a platter.”
****
After the sudden break-up with Tiana, Kieran took an extended leave from work and went back to Staten Island to visit his family for a few weeks. He needed to recharge his batteries. He hated, absolutely hated, how a woman could mess up his concentration. He specifically made it a rule not to care and he was always caught up in caring. If only he could be a player like his younger brothers…“We broke up,” Kieran replied, “simple as that.”
“So you say,” Nicola rinsed off a plate and set it in the drying rack, “but was it?”
“I moved out and moved on,” Kieran added sugar to his too-hot coffee, “and so did she.”
Nicola glanced over at her son. She was convinced that out of her five sons, Kieran was the most sensitive. It was no surprise to her that he opened a child care instead of going into the family business. “I take it that it wasn’t your fault?”
“Actually, it was,” Kieran took a sip of coffee, “I should’ve never broken my personal rule.”
“Rule schmule,” Nicola shook her head, “you can’t help who you fall in love with,
il figlio
.”
“Actually, you can,” Kieran countered, “You can always stop a situation if you know no good will come out of it.”
“You could do that. And you could be alone and lonely with several cats like your
Zia
Antonia,”
Nicola shook her head, “I’m just waiting for her to come out of the closet, already.”
“I’d rather not talk about it anymore,” Kieran huffed. “She made her decision and that’s that. We both moved on.”
“If you say so,
il figlio
,” Nicola finished the dishes and rinsed off her hands, “but the heart wants what the heart wants.”
“Yeah, well, my heart wants something it can’t have,” Kieran replied back.
Nicola walked up to her son and put a hand on his forearm. “Remember when I dreamt about rainbows, when all three of you were here last time?”
It was a memory Kieran would rather forget. “Yes.”
“A dream deferred is not a dream denied,” she tapped his arm, “think about it.”
SIXTEEN
Looking around at the frantic mood in the hotel room, Tiana remembered her own wedding day all too well. She remembered how much of a nervous wreck she was. She had jittery butterflies in her stomach all day. Come to think of it, it might have been a sign she was making the biggest mistake of her natural born life. The wedding day went
too
perfectly. There was not a distraction or hiccup in sight. Tiana knew why that was the case; she was way too anal retentive to let anything interfere with her wedding day.