Xavier nodded. “Yes, that’s true in a way. We don’t watch you every minute of every day. We check in on you every now and again until you reach the point where you need us. Then we’re here to guide you to the right path.”
“Why only so often?”
“Each Protector can be assigned dozens, sometimes hundreds of charges. There are too many of you to try and watch daily. Each person has an invisible string tethered to them that the Fates weave and spin. Each choice you make leads you to your Fate. As Protectors, we have an identical cord tethered from you to us. When we feel the pull the strongest, we know that’s when you need us. When it happens, that person has our full and complete attention for as long as necessary.”
“Or until you kill them,” I whispered.
He pursed his lips. “That is one choice, Rose, but it’s rare we’ve had to do that. People usually make the right decision on their own.”
“And if I don’t?” I asked softly. I needed them to pay for Jenny’s death. There was no other choice for me.
“You won’t, Rose,” he told me just as softly. “I have faith in you, even if you don’t have faith in yourself.”
“You don’t understand…”
“But I do,” he interrupted. “You loved you sister, and what happened to her, it wasn’t right. They
do
need to pay for their sins, but to take their life? That’s not up to you, Rose. If you do that, the darkness you’ve always felt inside
will
take over. You’re already becoming a dark witch, and if you sacrifice all those souls, you’ll
be
a dark witch. There’s no turning back from that.”
“You don’t understand!” I shouted, frustrated.
“You’re wrong, Rose, I
do
understand.” Xavier turned to face me, his black eyes pools of warmth. “I know you, have watched you, since before the day you were born. When you lost your sister the first time, it nearly broke you. Then you found her again, but this time it was witches who took her away from you. You don’t just blame those idiotic children, you blame yourself. You’re a witch, you should have seen what was happening to her. You believe that if you do this, it’ll ease some of the guilt you feel, but it won’t. It’ll only make things so much worse.”
I didn’t blame myself. I blamed all those stupid kids who were playacting at being witches, at forming a coven. They violated what witchcraft stood for, they used their magic to hurt people. Jenny didn’t deserve to be their victim, their guinea pig. I should have seen what was happening to her. I talked to her every freaking day, and I never saw it. How stupid did that make me? Maybe I did blame myself for my sister’s death. I was a witch, after all. I should’ve seen the signs. I should have been able to stop it.
A tear slipped down my face, and Xavier reached out and caught it before it could finish its wet path. His fingers stroked my face gently, and it caused my heart to speed up. His hand cupped my cheek, and it was all I could do to hold back the sigh that wanted to escape. How could he do this to me when I knew what he was? It made no sense.
“You’re overthinking it, Rose,” he whispered and leaned in closer, his lips a hair’s breadth from my own. “Better yet, don’t think, just feel.”
It felt like someone hit me with a lightning bolt the minute his lips met mine. My mind blurred, and then the Elements surrounded me. Fire burned through me, and Air fanned the flames. Water crashed over me in waves, sucking me deeper and deeper into Xavier’s kiss. His smell turned earthy, and my own connection to the Earth became stronger. I could feel the dirt beneath me, feel it center me, and I relaxed into Xavier’s embrace, lost to the joy of what was happening to me. Spirit bound it all together, and I knew in this moment, I’d never feel like this with anyone else. This guy, this…stone monster, had just ruined me for anyone else.
When Xavier pulled away, we were both winded and dazed. He looked more than shaken, he looked terrified. “What was that?” he asked once he was able to speak.
“You felt it?” I asked, surprised. When he nodded, I explained. “That was the five Elements, Earth, Air, Fire, Water, and Spirit. They, well, they blessed us in a way.”
“What the hell?” he asked, startled. “That…that…”
“Can be scary the first time you feel it,” I soothed. It really freaked him out. I remember the first time I’d felt the rush, I’d run crying to my dad, scared I’d done something wrong. He’d told me it was a rare thing when the Elements decided to greet you, and I should be honored. Since then, each time I’d felt them all, it had thrilled me knowing they believed me special enough to commune with me. I hadn’t felt them in months, though. Not since deciding upon my plan.
“No, no, you don’t understand!” He jumped up and started to pace. “I didn’t realize…it’s not possible…I can’t…”
I watched him, alarmed and amused all at once. I’d never seen Xavier lose his cool the entire time I’d known him. Now, he looked like a kid who’d just been told Santa Claus wasn’t real.
“Xavier, you need to calm down and talk to me,” I said after a few minutes of watching him mutter and pace. “If I didn’t react like this when you told me you were a creature that lurks on top of buildings, then you need to man up and take a greeting from the Elements like a woman!”
That got his attention. He stopped and stared at me, his mouth gaping. I chuckled, I couldn’t help it. I tried my best to hold it in, but it escaped in a bubble of laughter. He was in full freak out mode.
“You don’t understand what this means for one of my kind, Melinda,” he said softly. “If you choose wrong, you’ve condemned us both.”
I frowned. What the hell was he talking about now? How could I condemn him with my choices? “Explain,” I told him, my stomach knotting in trepidation.
Xavier sighed and came back to sit beside me again. He didn’t look at all happy about it either, which kinda pissed me off, honestly. He was the one who’d kissed
me
. I’d tried my best to stay the hell away from him, but he pushed. And now he stood here acting like a virgin who’d just been duped into giving it up. He needed to get over it.
“My people, as I told you, have always been messengers to all species. We used to pick and choose whom we served. We made those choices out of respect for those who honored us and we honored in return. There were exceptions. Sometimes, the choice of whom we served was taken from us. One of those exceptions was when we were blessed by the five Elements. The blessing bestowed upon the messenger sealed our fate to the other half of the blessing. In essence, my fate is now bound with yours. For all eternity.”
My eyes widened. That couldn’t be at all good.
“What that means, Rose, is if you choose to murder those children and you turn into a dark witch, I will be forever bound to serve the darkness in you. My soul will become as tainted and black as your own. You’ll condemn
my soul
to Hell for all eternity. Now do you understand why I’m freaking out? I don’t know if I can sway you from this path of destruction, and if I’m forced to kill you, then I’ll die too!”
I hadn’t counted on that. It was one thing to possibly lose my own soul, but to condemn someone else to the same fate? Jenny needed to be avenged, though. What was I supposed to do? Just forget about what they did to her? Everything in me screamed no, but at the same time, could I really condemn Xavier along with me?
I reached to touch him, but he recoiled from me. I flinched at the rejection. Somehow that hurt a lot more than it should have. If he didn’t want me to touch him, fine. I was only trying to comfort him. He wanted to act like an ass, then I’d treat him like one.
Digging my phone out of my back pocket, I started looking for Jeff’s number. He could grab my keys and come pick me up in the Bug.
“What are you doing?” he asked when he saw my phone.
“Calling Jeff to come get me,” I said.
“Why?”
I arched a brow at him. “Seriously? You think I want to sit here all day with someone who can’t stand the sight of me? You’re flinching away from me, Xavier, and I didn’t
do
anything
to you!”
He snatched my phone from me and shoved it in his back pocket. I snarled and dived at him, intent upon getting my phone, but somehow I ended up underneath him, with my hands trapped above my head in one of his.
“No, Rose, I told you we had things to talk about today, and I meant that. I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings, but I wasn’t expecting what happened.”
“Get off,” I snarled.
“Not until you calm down,” he said patiently. “Just give me a minute to wrap my head around this, okay?”
I glared.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “Really, I am. It’s not every day you have to accept the fact that you either have to serve a dark witch or die yourself to save you both. I need a minute, okay?”
“Fine, take your minute,” I huffed. When he put it that way, what was I supposed to say? I wasn’t
that
unfeeling. Not yet anyway. He was getting close to the end of my patience, though.
“If I let you up, are you going to try and tackle me again?” he asked, a smile playing at the corners of his lips.
“Are you giving me back my phone?” I countered.
“Not until we’re done,” he said. “We have a lot to talk about, Rose.”
I sighed. He’d probably keep me like this all day until I agreed to his terms. “No, I won’t tackle you.”
He jumped back and pulled me into a sitting position in one fluid motion. How did he do that? My movements never looked that graceful.
“So, stuff to talk about?” I asked after we’d sat still for a full ten minutes. He’d had his minute, and now it was time to start talking or I was leaving, even if I had to walk home.
Xavier gave me a grumpy look, and I glared right back.
“You need to learn some patience, Rose,” he sighed. “You already know the gist of what Protectors do. We watch over humans who have the potential to cause problems in Heaven.”
“I don’t understand that,” I said. “Why would my revenge have anything to do with causing problems in Heaven?”
“
Patience
, Rose.” He put a finger over my lips. “We haven’t gotten that far yet. Now, shush and let me explain.”
Patience and I didn’t work well together. Never had, never would.
“I was assigned to you only a few months after your conception by the Archangel Michael himself. I wasn’t told why, only to watch over you until you needed me to help you chose the right path. I thought nothing of it, I had at least a dozen other charges to look after, and several were coming upon their D-Day. I
was
there, the day you were born, however. There were complications with your birth, and you almost died. I had to step in and add a little of my own healing magic to ensure you lived. I suppose that is what made me keep a closer eye on you than the rest of my charges. I’d never had to save any of them before, and I felt responsible for you.”
I remembered Dad told me there had been a complication with my birth, and they’d done an emergency C-section. My heartbeat had slowed, and they thought something might have been wrong with my heart, but when I was born, I’d been perfectly healthy. The hospital thought maybe the equipment had malfunctioned. At least now I knew the truth of it. I
had
been sick, to the point of death, and Xavier saved me even then.
“I was there the day you fell off your tricycle and declared you would never ride another bike again until Jenny jumped on it and took off. You couldn’t let your sister show you up. I was there the day your mother died, and the day Jenny’s father took her away. I’ve been there for every major event in your life, Rose.”
Jenny’s funeral came to mind. It had been a horrible day, and all I could do was try my best not to snarl every hateful thing at her father I’d dreamed of saying. He’d looked as broken as I’d felt. There had been a moment, when I’d turned away from the gravesite, when I thought I’d seen something in the trees. The only reason I’d paid it any attention was because it had blocked out the sun. Before I could investigate, Jenny’s dad had given me her diary, and I’d forgotten all about the shape in the tree.
“Was that you in the tree the day of Jenny’s funeral?” I finally asked.
He nodded. “Yes, it was my best way of tracking you. I knew then you’d started on your path of destruction, and my only focus from that point on has been you, Rose.”
“Do you fly when you change into…into whatever it is you look like?”
“Yes, I can fly,” he laughed, “but more about that later. I realized you were very special when you were about six and all the Elements surrounded you when you entered your family’s circle. That’s rare, Rose. It almost never happens. It affirmed to me how powerful you would become. So I started researching why you were being watched over.”
“And did you find out what I’m supposed to do that will jeopardize Heaven?”
“When the Great War occurred in Heaven, Lucifer was cast into Hell. Everyone knows this, even those who do not believe in Christianity can repeat the story. What they don’t realize is that Angels fall all the time. The worst of them don’t always go to Hell. The very worst were kept separate from Lucifer. Instead, they were trapped in stone and given into the care of the Holy Keepers of the Faith. Mostly you find the statues in church gardens these days. Many, even those of the Faith, have no idea what they really are anymore. To the world today, they’re just very lifelike statues.”
“So you’re telling me some of the most dangerous, evil Angels are trapped in statues here on Earth?” I asked. I did not want to know that. Now every time I looked at a statue, I’d be looking at it for signs of, well…of it being an Angel.
“Not all Angels who fall are bad, Rose,” Xavier explained patiently. “Sometimes, they fall because of love. They don’t have free will like humans do. If they disobey, that’s it. They fall. I just want to be clear on that. You’re going to meet some Fallen Angels, and just keep in mind they may have fallen for a reason other than trying to overthrow Heaven.”
I nodded. I could keep an open mind. I performed witchcraft. If a witch couldn’t keep an open mind, then no one could.
“There are events I can’t tell you about, events you won’t be able to stop, but those events will lead you to where you do need to be. Once there, you’ll be a piece of a puzzle needed to prevent another war, only it will be a war here on Earth. Please don’t ask me what events, because I’ve given you all the information I’m allowed to.”