The Outside (28 page)

Read The Outside Online

Authors: Laura Bickle

Tags: #Young Adult Dystopian Fantasy

The soldiers had a list of houses to stop at, like mailmen along their route. At each stop, a soldier knocked at the door, asked for a headcount. He took a brief census of everyone in the house, asked if anyone was ill, and went on to the next.

They had to make a stop at the graveyard, too. The graveyard was larger than I remembered, with disturbed earth. There were fresh markers and at least a dozen hills of unsettled soil.

The truck stopped and we clambered out. I traded sidelong glances with Alex. He and I had followed the Hexenmeister’s prescriptions for dealing with the dead: staking, then cutting off the heads and burning the bodies. If garlic was handy, that was a bonus.

“You’re still burying the dead?” Alex asked.

“The regular dead, yes. But we check on them. Make sure they’re well and truly in the dirt. Herr Stoltz asked us to meet him here. Said he saw something strange.”

The old man was sitting in a buggy beside the graveyard. Wheezing, he stepped out of the cab and down to the ground. I noticed right away that the buggy was pulled by a familiar white horse. I ran to Horace and rubbed his nose. He chuffled at me in delight. Though the Hexenmeister had conscripted him for buggy duty, the old man had clearly been compensating by overfeeding him. Green grass stained his white hide.

I did not speak to the Hexenmeister. I did not want to put him in obvious danger of defying the
Bann
in front of other Plain people. I’d already put my parents under the Elders’ critical eye after walking brazenly into my house. There was no point in continuing to endanger those I loved.

A gray shape flowed from the buggy to the ground. I heard clicks and the shuffling of guns behind me.

“No!” I said, casting my arms out. I was well aware of how fearsome he looked. “Don’t shoot him.”

Fenrir bounded up to Alex, then to me, slobbering all over our faces. I smiled and stroked his sides.

“Where’d you get the . . . ah . . . dog?” a soldier asked.

The Hexenmeister shrugged. “He showed up awhile back. He’s a good dog.”

Fenrir wagged his tail, wriggling his entire backside in good humor.

The soldier gestured to the graveyard. “Tell us what you see.”

Herr Stoltz leaned against his cane. “I see nothing. But the animals do. Let me show you.”

He led Horace to the graves. Horace docilely stepped over the old, settled mounds and most of the new hillocks of dirt before stopping before a fresh grave. He refused to step over it, shying away and stepping around. I knew what that meant.

“Mark that grave,” Herr Stoltz said.

I glanced at the headstone. It belonged to a widower in his eighties. That he could have died during the simple shock of these events was no surprise.

A soldier came forward with a can of spray paint and painted a large red
X
on the dirt. We repeated this process with the rest, and Horace was as pliant and docile as a horse could be.

“I don’t get it,” one of the soldiers said.

Herr Stoltz nodded to himself. “The animals know when something is amiss. A white horse is a particularly pure creature. He will not walk over the graves of the restless dead.”

“So . . . it’s sort of like dogs sensing earthquakes?”


Ja
, it is much like that.”

“Doesn’t seem very . . . scientific.”

“My boy, there is nothing scientific about this pursuit.”

Fenrir crept to the graveyard, his nose to the dirt. He wound around the simple grave markers. I followed behind him, watching. He paused at the spray-painted grave and began to dig. I stepped aside as he threw up clods of loose dirt.

The soldiers’ hands flexed on their guns. “There’s a vampire down there?”


Ja
, I believe so. And the dog thinks so too.”

Fenrir dug to the depth of his back hips in the dirt and retreated, growling. I brushed the dirt from his fur and peered into the grave.

I had the sense of looking into a dark corner behind a shutter where a spider had made a home. Thin filaments of cobwebs crossed the edges of the grave, spun silk clinging around the egg sac of a corpse.

One of the soldiers swore. He tried to push the gossamer filaments aside with the barrel of his gun, but the threads clung. Another man brought shovels from the truck, and they pulled the sticky mixture of milky material and dirt away to reveal a corpse at the bottom of the hole, surrounded by the fragments of a smashed coffin.

I had seen many dead bodies. Plain people didn’t preserve their dead or install them in concrete vaults. We washed and dressed them straightaway, and put them in the ground as soon as possible in simple wooden boxes, buried with their feet facing east. Even in that short time, I had seen cheeks grown sunken and smelled that soft scent of decay that begins to cling to bodies dead from natural causes.

This was not such a corpse. It lay on its side in a fetal position. Its black hat covered its head, and its hands were tucked in the dirt and splinters, away from view.

“Burn it,” the Hexenmeister breathed.

One of the soldiers led Herr Stoltz away, mindful that the old man not trip over clods of dirt. I was heartened by that bit of tenderness.

I glanced back at Elijah and the other Amish man. They stood at the edge of the grave, the knuckles on their rifles white. They knew that man, as well as I did. And they knew that what they were doing was not a proper burial according to the
Ordnung
.

I wondered how they had decided which rules to follow and which to ignore. Elijah had been baptized, joined the church, and then chose to rebel. In the eyes of the
Ordnung
, his sin was worse than mine, the rebellion of an unbaptized woman who had not wholly agreed to follow the path of the Lord. And I felt a pang of jealous anger that he was not shunned the way I was.

I turned back to see a soldier uncapping a metal container that smelled like gasoline. He poured it into the grave, and the fumes shimmered in the cold air. Another stood away, struck a match, and threw it into the hole.

The flames rose up in a
fwoosh
. I crept closer, wanting to make well and truly certain that the body was alight. Through the smoke and orange flames, I could see the body curling in on itself. I hoped that he would burn peacefully.

A skeletal hand reached up, snatched the blazing hat from his face. Black eyes burned from a pale face, the wrath as palpable as the heat.

“Watch out!” I cried. “It’s—”

“It’s coming out!” Alex echoed my thought. He pulled me away from the conflagration. I reached down to pick up one of the abandoned shovels. Pure habit now. Instinct.

Bullets chewed into the dirt, obliterating any speech. I flinched back from the sound of the guns, but not the burning creature clawing its way out of the pit.

Its eyes fixed on me. And it lunged for me.

C
HAPTER
T
WENTY
-T
HREE

I knew, in daylight, I was just as vulnerable as any other human.

But the vampire was vulnerable in daylight, as well. I could see it smoking and withering.

It gained purchase on the edge of the grave and leaped toward me, but I was ready.

We
were ready.

Alex had snatched up one of the other shovels. Before the creature’s steaming hands could reach me, he’d slammed the shovel into its chest. The vampire snarled, and Alex flung him to the dirt. He pressed all his weight behind the shovel, forcing the point through its ribs, splitting them open under the sharp point of metal so that the wooden shaft impaled him.

I didn’t hesitate. I rushed to Alex’s side with my own shovel. With all my strength, I slammed the point of the shovel down on the vampire’s throat. I saw a glimmer of something human in its expression. Something familiar. But that didn’t stop me. I put my foot to the shovel, feeling it split sinew and bone. I tried to imagine digging through a recalcitrant tree root to plant a new garden.

I felt the creature moving under me, but the soldiers’ shovels were sharp. The old man’s head split off, like the head of a daisy from a stalk. It rolled three feet, coming to rest next to the boots of the soldiers. Its hair was still on fire, smoldering in the sunshine.

The soldier looked from the head to me, Alex, and back again.

“Nice work, you two.”

Behind them, Elijah stared at me, blinking.

“God looks kindly upon those who do his dirty work,” I murmured immodestly.

Pride was a terrible sin, but I allowed it to flicker through me, just that once.

It felt warm.

***

The soldiers treated Alex and me differently after that. I expected them to shrink away after that display of brutality, to treat us as if we were animals. Indeed, violence was something to be ashamed of. It was not a quality cultivated in Plain people.

But to the soldiers, it was as if we had completed some rite of passage. They offered me cigarettes, which I declined, and began to laugh and joke with grim humor about the corpses they were finding. They offered Alex a pistol and instructed him on how to use it. They set a can out on the edge of a fence post and cheered when he was able to shoot it off.

These things did not interest me. I felt the Hexenmeister’s smile on me, and that meant more to me than the approval of the soldiers.

Fenrir was not fond of guns. He leaned against my side as I walked through the graveyard, running my fingers over the stones of the newly dead. I recognized all of them, of course. I saw all the names of the Hersberger family. Before we had been placed under the
Bann
, I had personally plunged stakes in their hearts and taken their heads.

Beyond them, I saw two other families, parents and children. I paused to pluck some late-growing weeds away from the stones. These were the families who had been burned in my absence. Odd that I felt some kinship to the soldiers in this terrible work.

“Katie.”

I looked up. Elijah stood above me.

I turned away. “I am under the
Bann
. If you are a righteous member of the church, you should not speak to me.” More than that, I didn’t
want
to speak to him. I felt incredible wrath toward him.

It was best that we did not speak.

“Katie, I wanted to say that I’m sorry.”

My brows drew together, and I plucked more viciously at the weeds. “What for?”

“For . . . for everything. For trying to push you into baptism and marriage. For letting the vampires in. For turning you and the Englisher in to the Elders. I . . . I did wrong.”

“According to the
Ordnung
, you did right.”


Ja
, but . . .” He stared down at the rifle in his hands. “I am not wholly convinced that the
Ordnung
is the only right.”

I waited for him to continue.

“I could not have lived with myself, knowing that I caused your death. No matter what kinds of sins you committed, they were not for me to judge. You will stand before God in your time, and so will I. I can never make up it up to you . . . what it must have been like to be Outside.” I could tell that his eyes still reflected the violence I’d shown him.

I plucked the leaves from a piece of ironweed. The thorns stung my fingers. “It was hard. And bloody. And we lost Ginger.”

“I’m sorry.”

I said nothing.

“I just . . . wanted you to know. I was wrong. It may take a whole lifetime to make it up, but . . .”

I shook my head. I didn’t like this kind of talk. It was too close to suggesting that he and I would have some kind of relationship. “I don’t want you to make it up to me,” I said. “I want you to simply . . . look after my family, as best you can.”

He nodded. “I will.”

I looked up at the sun in the sky and the purple ironweed in my hands. I had known the harsh dirty work of manual labor. But equally hard was the emotional work of faith. Repentance and forgiveness.

I looked at Elijah, feeling my anger dissolve. There was no point to holding on to the hate. “I forgive you.”

He lowered his head, and I could see tears in his eyes. “Thank you, Katie. Thank you.”

This time, when I walked away from him, it was without love and without hate. It was with a profound sense of peace that I knew didn’t come from my own heart. It came from God.

***

“There’s a problem.”

When we returned to the barn, Simmonds was waiting for us. His arms were crossed over his chest, and I could tell by the dust on his boots that he’d been pacing.

“What’s wrong?” Alex asked.

“Your serum.” Simmonds jabbed a finger toward one of the stalls.

We rushed to the stall, peered inside. Tobias was lying on a sleeping bag, glossed in sweat. He was very still. The medic was crouched beside him, pressing a stethoscope to his chest.

“Is he sick?” I said.

“No. He’s not sick,” the medic said. “Not anymore. Now he’s dead.”

I stared at the body. He had been incredibly alive, just a few hours before.

“What happened?” Alex demanded.

“He started off sick. Ralphed his breakfast up in a bucket. Then started vomiting blood. He spiked a fever of a hundred and five, and then lost consciousness. He didn’t wake up.”

“That’s not supposed to happen,” Alex blurted. “That didn’t happen to anyone up north.”

“How many people took it?”

“Twenty-five, maybe thirty of us.”

“Well, it could be lethal in a significant part of the population,” Jasper said. “Or you’ve got a bad sample.”

“I can’t lose any more men to this,” Simmonds said, from the doorway. “I can’t deny the results, but there’s something wrong. I can’t, in good conscience, ask anyone else to take it.”

“But couldn’t there have been another factor?” Alex insisted. “Some genetic weakness that interacted with the serum, or some constitutional issue? Or he could already have been infected from handling the vamp you brought in to torture Katie.”

“My men are all healthy,” Simmonds barked.

I went to kneel beside Tobias while the men argued. I took his hand, which was still supple and warm. I thanked him for his sacrifice and said the Lord’s Prayer for him.

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