The Party Line, a Myrtle Crumb Mystery Prequel

A Myrtle Crumb Mystery Prequel

by

Gayle Trent

PARTY LINE

A Myrtle Crumb Novella

by Gayle Trent

Published 2003, 2015

Published by Grace Abraham Publishing,
Bristol, VA 24202.

Copyright 2003, 2015 Gayle Trent.

All rights reserved. No part of this
publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or
transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical,
recording or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the
author.

Manufactured in the United States of
America.

Mercy goodness! I just found a journal from
way back when Sunny was just a baby. Sunny is my granddaughter, you
know, and her given name is Crimson. I’ve never been able to figure
out why my daughter Faye hung that name on the child, though. I’m
guessing her Daddy gave it to her, and Faye just went along with
him to keep the peace. But, gracious, they weren’t celebrities who
could get away with naming their young ‘uns things like Moon Unit
and Apple, for goodness’ sake. Anyhow, I call my grandbaby Sunny
because ever since she came into my life, she’s been my
sunshine.

Back when I was keeping this journal, Sunny
was only around three years old. Her daddy had died in an accident
when she was about eighteen months old, and Crandall passed not too
awfully long after that. I imagine I was still hurting too badly
from the loss of Crandall to realize how hard his death must’ve hit
Faye practically on the heels of losing her husband Steve.

When you read this, you’ll realize that it
took Backwater quite a while to come on up into the modern world.
We still had party lines back then. If you’re as young as you look,
you don’t have a clue as to what’s a party line. Well, back in the
day, there weren’t enough wires or something to give every phone
their own private line. I don’t know why, but several people in a
community shared a phone line. If you picked up at the right time,
you could hear what your neighbors were talking about to each
other, the grocer, the bank…whoever they were talking to. And, by
the same token, they could eavesdrop on you too.

Everybody whines these days about the
government listening in on their calls. Back then, we all did it.
And we all knew we did it. We didn’t particularly like it—having
our own calls listened to anyway—but it’s all we had.

The story I’m getting
ready to tell you is about my first case. This is really before I
even officially became a detective. It’s not like I have my license
now or anything like that, but I
do
have a reputation…a reputation for getting to the
bottom of things.

So sit back and put your feet up and let me
tell you how I kept Tansie Miller’s daughter out of jail.

Ada's back. Forty-two years old and movin'
back in with her Mama. I saw it all from my picture window in the
living room. Didn't even have to leave my rocker-recliner. Didn't
have to turn down "The Young and The Restless" either. It wouldn't
have done me any good—I couldn’t have heard anything anyway. I’ll
wait to get the real scoop on the party line.

Oh, yes, we here in Backwater still have a
party line. We're probably the only people left in the
country—heck, the world!—who has one, but we have one; and frankly,
I like it that way. It keeps me connected. You know…a party line.
Where you share a telephone line with your neighbors. Now, I'm not
saying I'm nosy or anything, but I think it's good to know what's
goin' on around you. Don't you?

Who am I? Well, I'm Myrtle Crumb. Been
livin' in Backwater all my life. My dear Crandall died about ten
years ago, but I have a beautiful daughter, Faye. Unlike Tansie's
daughter, Ava, she doesn't live with me anymore. She's a good girl.
Has a good life…far as I know.

I'm anxious to see what's
brought Ava home. She's married to a man who owns a construction
business. I
guess
she's still married; but if she's movin' back home with her
Mama, well, it looks like there's trouble in paradise, don't you
think? Anyway, they had it real good, from what I hear. Nice house,
two nice cars… Ava always looks like she just stepped out of a
bandbox. Not that she looks all that great today. Hair looks like a
hooraw's nest….

[Click, click, click.]

Ah, there's the phone. Let me mute my
program. Be real quiet now.

"Ava?"

"No, Bill, this is Tansie."

"Tansie, lemme speak to Ava."

"I'm not so sure she wants to talk to you
right now, Bill."

"Well, I wanna talk to her. If you don't put
her on the phone right now, I'm comin' over there."

"Hold on a minute."

This oughta be good. Shhhh!

"Bill, don't you be callin' over here
threatening my Mama."

"I did not threaten your Mama, Ava. I simply
told her that if you didn't come to the phone, I was comin' over
there."

"And you don't call that a threat?"

"No, I sure don't. Now, let's stop all this
nonsense. Come on back home."

"Home to what? Your lies…your gamblin'?
You'd rather be out partyin' with your friends than home with
me."

"Sugar, you know that ain't so."

"It is so, and don't you call me Sugar."

"What do I need to do to show you I
care?"

"I don't know.” She sighed. “Just let me
spend a day or two with Mama…. I just need to figure everything
out."

"All right. I love you, Ava."

"Love you, Bill."

[Click.]

Well, there you go. Bill's been out cattin'
around, and Ava's sick of it. Notice how he said, "I love you,
Ava," but she said, "Love you, Bill" like she didn't really mean
it?

Maybe she thinks it's time to take ol' Bill
to the cleaners and kick him out of that fancy house. Maybe move
somebody else in. Maybe somebody younger. Women are doin' that
these days. Used to always be the men who would cash in their older
wives for a younger one, but women are doin' it these days, too.
They figure what's good for the goose is good for the gander, I
reckon. Why that Anita Hodges hooked up with that J.T., and him not
but nineteen years old. Now that's on "The Young and The Restless,"
of course, but you know, these daytime drama series—that's what
they're called on the Emmy awards—they mirror real life.

[Click, click, click.]

Let's see who that is.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Tansie?"

"Hi, Melvia. How are you today?"

"I'm fine. It's you and Ava I'm worried
about."

"Why's that?"

"Well, I saw Ava come in over there with her
suitcase."

"She's just stayin' with me a few days is
all," Tansie said.

"Are you sick or something?"

"No. I'm fine."

"Are Ava and Bill havin' trouble?"

"Well, why would you think that? He called
her just a minute ago…probably to make sure she got here all
right."

"Did he? Well…. If there's anything you all
need, just let me know."

"We, will, Melvia. Thank you for callin'.
Bye."

[Click.]

Melvia and Tansie are
sisters, but that don't mean that Tansie wants her to know
everything. Or vice versa. In fact, they're pretty competitive; and
each one wants the other one to think that her life is just peachy
keen. You oughta hear them at Christmas—tellin' each other what
they got from who, who said they looked nice, who said that their
bread puddin' was better than
anybody’s
. Naturally, the other
sister is the "anybody" whose bread puddin' don't measure
up.

[Click, click, click.]

"Hello, you have reached Reverend Jeff and
Elizabeth Parris. We can't come to the phone right now, but please
leave a message at the sound of the beep."

"Preacher Jeff, this is Melvia Hobson. I'm
calling about my niece Ava. I want you to put her on the prayer
list because I believe she and her husband are having marital
problems. Thank you, and God bless you, Preacher."

[Click.]

Oh, ho, ho! That Melvia is
a sight. She'd better call back and put herself on the prayer list;
because when Tansie gets wind of this, all heck's gonna break
loose
.

I want you to know Tansie was livid that
Melvia put Ada and Bill on the prayer list. I started to say you
should've been here to hear that conversation, but on second
thought, no, you shouldn't have. Tansie had to go back to church
Sunday night just to repent for all the names she called Melvia…and
I expect she'll have to repent some more at Bible study on
Wednesday.

You remember how Bill had called Ada beggin'
that girl to come home? Well, now he's singin' a different tune. I
don't know whether he got the idea off a talk show or what—sounds
awful much like Dr. Phil to me, but the last call he made to Ada
was to tell her to either come back home or to tell him she didn't
want him anymore so he could get on with his life.

"So I can get on with my life—" Those were
his very words.

[Click, click, click.]

Let me mute my television.

"Tansie? You ain't gonna believe this."

"I'm not in the mood, Melvia. I'm still not
over what you told the preacher about—"

"Well, then, you'd better get in the mood
because Doris May Culpepper is about to steal Ada's man right away
from her."

"Doris May Culpepper? What're you talkin'
about?"

"Hazel Thompson saw Doris May hittin' on
Bill down at the diner."

"So? Them Culpeppers always have been the
biggest flirts you ever saw."

"Well, yeah, but Hazel heard him swallow the
bait right up," Melvia said.

"Huh?"

"Bill made a date with Doris May for this
very evening!"

"Are you sure?"

"Sure as I'm settin' here. Hazel Thompson
wouldn't lie…. Well, about that bein' her hair's natural color,
maybe, but not about something as important as this."

Heavy sigh from Tansie. "Well, honey, thanks
for telling me. I'd better get off from here and tell Ada."

"All righty. If you need anything—like for
me to go smack that Doris May right up side the head—"

"Huh. Bill made the date. He's the one what
oughta be smacked."

"Yeah, but that hussy knows he's a married
man. She ought not to have been castin' her wares around in front
of him."

"Yeah, I know,” said Tansie. “Like I said,
I'd better tell Ada."

[Click.]

Ain't that a fine howdy-do? Well, the man
told Ada to make up her mind. I'd say she'd better do it before
Doris May Culpepper makes it up for her.

In case you're wondering, Doris May was
named after Doris Day. I know because I went to school with Doris
May's mother, and the woman was totally infatuated with Doris Day.
She wanted to be Doris Day; but since the opportunity had already
passed for her, she named her baby Doris May. It was supposed to
have been Doris Day, but she mumbled and the nurse wrote down "May"
instead of "Day" on the birth certificate. Oh, well. That stuff
happens sometimes. I heard even Oprah was supposed to have been
"Orpah," and they spelled it wrong on her birth certificate. I'm
glad. After seeing Oprah on television all these years, it don't
sound right to call her "Orpah."

If memory serves, Doris May is married. But,
then, Tansie and Melvia talked about Bill being married, but they
didn't mention Doris May being married. I'd better check this out.
Now, keep still while I'm on the phone. Don't want Melvia to know
I'm discussin' her and her sister's business with anybody.

"Melvia? Hi, sweetie, it's Myrtle Crumb.
How’re you doin'?"

"I'm fine, Myrtle. How're you?"

"I'm doin' all right, but I have to say, I'm
awfully concerned about poor Ada."

"Well, I am, too. She oughta go back home
like she has some sense."

"I hope it's not too late already," I
said.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Well, I hate to gossip, but I heard that
Bill was hanging around Doris May Culpepper."

"Have mercy, don't word travel fast?" Melvia
clucked her tongue.

"I don't know that I believe it, though. I
thought Doris May was married to that nice restaurant manager."

"Oh, that ended about a year and a half ago.
From what I hear, he's still crazy about her, but she left him.
Said it was because he drank too much."

"Well, ain't that a shame?"

"Yeah. Yeah, it is, Myrtle. But the real
shame is that now another home is about to be broke up because of
it."

"Ain't that the truth? Well, if there's
anything I can do…."

"Thanks, dear, but I doubt there's anything
any of us can do at this point."

"Now, I wouldn't be too sure about that. I
made a nice crumb cake this morning. Stop by later and we'll have a
piece and put our heads together over this predicament."