CHAPTER 3
S
he had failed the family test. The signs weren’t glaring like they’d be on a school paper, when one expecting a gold star instead received red marks and a minus sign. They were subtle, like the way Sherri gave her brother a big bear hug while offering Jessica a brief squeeze and tight smile. Or how Sherri’s friend, Renee, looked rather dubious when told it had been good to meet her. Nathan’s mother, Miss Elaine, was definitely the kindest of the bunch, and probably the nicest as well. The men, especially Nathan’s brother-in-law Randall, had been cordial but kept their distance. The other wives and girlfriends seemed distant at best. Not that she cared about them. The ones she wanted to win over were Miss Elaine and Sherri, and in this instance one out of two wasn’t good enough. Especially given what was at stake, what she’d promised both herself and others. Especially given that Nathan was head and shoulders above any other man she’d ever known.
Having watched his family interact, she could only imagine what they must have thought about her actions, could only guess at the conversations that took place after they’d left. It was obvious to anyone watching that Nathan had grown up in a loving, trusting environment, where sharing one’s thoughts and feelings was expected, even encouraged. Jessica’s childhood home had been filled with secrets and silence. From early on, she’d learned to shield her thoughts and guard her privacy. For her, personal conversations did not come easy. Old habits died hard.
If only I hadn’t . . .
Jessica jumped up from the couch and walked to the window of her second-floor condo near Five Points. Of all the things she’d been thinking about since the weekend she’d spent with Nathan—first with his family in Virginia and then with his D.C. friends—what could, should, and would have been wasn’t part of the process. It was Sunday evening. After being practically inseparable from Nathan for four straight days, some of the happiest of her life, she was back home. It had been less than an hour, but already felt like days. For the first time in a very long time she felt bereft and very alone.
A song came on the radio. Jessica smiled. It was one of Nathan’s all-time favorites, or so he’d told her the first time they’d heard it together, the night after meeting him at the sports bar. Jessica walked back to the couch, plopped down and grabbed a pillow as her mind drifted back to the night she’d spotted him across the room.
There ought to be a law.
That’s what Jessica thought as she looked across the crowded restaurant and beheld a table filled with caramel and chocolate testosterone. She lazily sipped a pomegranate martini, swinging a stiletto-clad foot as she watched them: laughing, scoping, sipping, too. They were all handsome but one stood out, and for more reasons than one. He was tall, at least six feet, which although she was only five foot three, she preferred. Nattily dressed, his eyes were expressive and his smile was easy. The group of four men was in a lively discussion. The one she watched spoke little but when he did, the others listened attentively to what he had to say.
A couple of times their eyes had met. After hearing snatches of conversation as she passed their table on her way to the bathroom, she stopped and boldly made her move. At her declaration of his superior position, Nathan had nodded with a casual smile. One of the guys blatantly flirted. But she’d walked away from the table as quickly as she’d come, had returned to her seat and become engrossed in something online. She’d finished her drink and believed a rendezvous with the handsome stranger a lost cause until she’d reached the door, felt a hand on her shoulder, and turned to find that same sexy, self-assured smile that had drawn her to his table now on display just for her.
They’d gone to dinner the next night, and dancing the night after that. The following weekend they’d enjoyed a neo-soul concert and the weekend after that they’d enjoyed each other. Nathan was a skillful, thoughtful lover, which she’d expected. What she hadn’t expected was to develop real feelings for him. Nor had she expected such feelings to be reciprocated.
No, that hadn’t been a part of the plan at all.
Her ringing cell phone brought Jessica out of her musings. Seeing the name on the Caller ID only further muddled her mood. “Hey.”
“Hey, girl. What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing. Just thinking.”
“About what?”
She hesitated. “Nathan.”
“That’s why I’m calling. How was Thanksgiving?”
“Fine. He has a nice family.” This elicited a snort from the other end. “I know you might not feel that way, but it’s true. His mother treated me kindly and his sister, too.”
“Sounds like everything is working according to plan, working out just the way we’d hoped. His taking you around the family is a sure sign that he’s falling for you, that he trusts you. Once you gain a person’s trust, anything can happen.”
“It’s not about trust. It’s about love. I believe I’m falling in love with him.”
A sarcastic laugh and then, “What’s love got to do with anything? No, don’t answer. I’ll tell you. Nothing. Absolutely nothing.”
“Being around his family showed me what I’ve never had but always wanted; I used to talk about it. Remember?”
“Yes, you always were the dreamer, the believer in fairy tales. But this is life, not a story book, and blood is thicker than water. You remember that.”