The Perfect Witness (13 page)

And Lee and Natalie were definitely troubled about her. Why? For God’s sake, just because she didn’t want to go out on dates? She had experimented with sex and found it exciting. But sex wasn’t love, and she had found genuine affection with Lee and Natalie. Affection and safety and the knowledge that she was as important to them as they were to her.

Okay, maybe that wasn’t normal. But it was
her
normal. She’d thought Lee and Natalie had understood. Evidently not. Perhaps she’d better make the effort to go out more. Maybe bring some guy home to dinner or spend the night at a motel to prove to them they weren’t cramping her style.

She started up the second landing.

As if she had a style yet. She was still stretching, learning, putting bandages on old wounds. She was doing pretty damn well for a cripple, and Lee and Natalie had helped enormously. But there was still a long way to go.

She opened the door to her room. She would just have to work her way around this sudden concern of Lee and Natalie’s and give them what they—

“Good evening, Allie. I had no idea you were such an enthusiastic cardplayer. I’ve been waiting a long time.”

Mandak.

She froze as she saw him lounging with legs outstretched before him in the big chair by the window. The sight of him struck her with that tingling awareness, as it always did. The piercing blue eyes that seemed to know and understand everything about her. The sensual mouth that was half-parted in a mocking smile. The muscular body that she had touched, felt the power, challenged, and yet been held and comforted by. Her own body was instinctively readying to meet that challenge.

“Hello, Mandak.” She hadn’t seen him for a few weeks and that had been for only one short hour. It wasn’t like the past sessions, where he’d actually probed, soothed, held her when the confusion and pain was too much. Those last couple visits it was as if he was making a duty call. He’d asked her about blocking problems, inquired about her karate training with Milt Nolan, the martial arts instructor to whom he’d assigned her, talked casually about Natalie and Lee. Then he’d gone as quickly as he’d come.

And left her on edge and feeling that maddening sense of loss and resentment that he could make her respond that way.

“I’m not enthusiastic about cards. Ask Lee and Natalie.” She slammed the door behind her. “And you wouldn’t have had to wait if you’d called me and asked if I was available instead of creeping up here like a cat burglar.” She looked at the open window. “Don’t tell me you actually did come in that way? I can’t believe it.”

“It seemed the best entry under the circumstances. I wanted to talk to you as soon as possible, and I didn’t want to run into Lee and Natalie.” He smiled. “And, besides, it brought back memories of the old days, when life was a little more exciting than it’s been lately.”

“The old days? I was joking about the cat burglar.” She gazed at him with narrowed eyes. “Should I have been?”

“Let’s just say I developed some similar skills in that direction.”

“It doesn’t surprise me. Cat burglary is minor in comparison to your true potential. Nothing surprises me about you. You killed three men in the first ten minutes after I met you.”

“And?”

“Okay.” He was waiting for honesty, and she gave it to him. “I would probably have been dead if you hadn’t done it.”

“But you still resent that I killed them.”

“No, I resent that you did it so easily and efficiently. Death should be difficult and hard. It’s the difference between good and evil. I grew up with a father and the people around him who had no trouble with killing.” She met his eyes. “I felt as if I were back with them when you stepped in and killed Tantona and the others. I was afraid of you.”

“You didn’t show it.”

“It didn’t last long. There were too many things happening to me. And I was too worried about the fact that your memories were blank to me.” She added, “But it comes back now and then.” She braced herself. “Like right now. And I don’t like to be afraid. It makes me want to strike out.”

“I know.”

“So, unless you want to get socked, why don’t you tell me why the hell you’re here tonight.”

He chuckled. “You do amuse me, Allie. There’s no one like you. You don’t have to be afraid of me.”

“I didn’t say I was afraid of you,” she said quickly. “Well, maybe I did. But I should have said I’m afraid of what you might bring to me, what … surrounds you.”

“Surrounds me?”

What was she doing speaking to him so bluntly? She had been avoiding that frankness since the moment he had turned her over to Josh Dantlow. No, that wasn’t true. Those weeks at the lodge had been honest in their own strange way. Afterward, she had deliberately walked carefully whenever she was with him. She had known in this new life that she could only let him enter tentatively and even then held at a distance. She couldn’t read his memories, but she’d always been aware that what lay beneath was violent and forceful and a power like nothing she’d ever encountered.

A power that drew her, fascinated her, as it was doing right now. When she was younger, that power revolved around the mental aura of danger that she had immediately recognized. But as she grew older and matured, it was sometimes overshadowed by the sexual response she had whenever she was near him. At the lodge, she had been too absorbed to let herself feel anything but the emotional response of that weird bonding and the obsession with what she was learning. That changed once he was no longer with her. The first time he’d come back to see her, it had hit her with solid, bewildering force. After that she had explored sex with a number of good-looking, virile men she’d met at the university, but she had never felt anything like the searing sexuality that she felt for Mandak. Dangerous sexuality. Sex could make you weak and pliable. It was one of the principal reasons why she had worked so hard to keep that coolness in place when he had visited her.

“Interesting observation.” His brows lifted. “I didn’t realize that you were that … sensitive. I wonder what else I’ve missed. I think it’s time I found out.” He added softly, “Come sit down, Allie. Your hands are clenched. But I doubt if you’re going to go on the attack until you hear what I have to say.”

She opened the hands she hadn’t realized she’d clenched. “Why didn’t you want Lee and Natalie to know that you were here?” She made a motion with her hand. “Never mind, I think I know. You’re going to try to persuade me to leave here, aren’t you? Well, I won’t go. Why should I? I don’t owe you anything, Mandak.” Only her life and sanity and the only loving family relationship she’d had since the day she was born. “Okay, maybe I do. But what you did for me was done for your own purpose.”

“That’s true,” Mandak said. “But I’m afraid persuasion wasn’t going to enter into it. Considering how bullheaded you are, I doubted whether arguments or wiles would work. But there are other methods.” He paused. “However, there are complications that have to be addressed before I delve into that. I
am
going to move you from the university, and this time I won’t involve Lee and Natalie.”

“Bullshit.” She stiffened. “I’m not going with you. I’m not leaving here, Mandak.”

“Camano may know where you are,” he said bluntly. “Your file was compromised.”

Shock. No, it couldn’t be true. Not after all this time. She’d even had dreams of actually being free. “How convenient. You’re lying.”

“No.”

She searched his expression. How would she even know if he was lying or not? He’d always been an enigma to her.

“It’s true, Allie. Call Josh Dantlow.”

“You told me that you could control him.”

“But you’ve gotten to know something about him. He’s an honest man.”

“Yes.” Her knees felt weak. She sank down on the bed. The nightmare had returned. She had almost felt as if the threat had disappeared over the horizon, but here was the ugliness staring her in the face. “How much chance is there that they’ll find me?”

“I can’t give you a percentage. I don’t like any odds that involve you and Camano. That’s why I’m taking you out of here.”

“Does Lee know?”

He shook his head. “I just found out myself.”

“Are you sure? Tonight he and Natalie were…”

“What?”

“They wanted me to go away.”

“I was expecting that to happen. No, that was about me, not Camano.”

“You?” She shook her head. “And I thought it was about me. I thought I wasn’t behaving normally enough for them.” She made a face. “Not surprising since I don’t know what normal really is. I was planning on how I could make them think I’d changed.”

“It wasn’t about you,” Mandak said. “They care about you. They were willing to give up a plan that we’d worked on for years to protect you.”

“What plan?” When he didn’t answer, she said slowly, “They were going to let you use me? I tried to believe they were just an innocent couple who were supposed to furnish credibility to my presence here. They were actually in on it?”

“They didn’t know you. All they knew was that you could help me, and they desperately wanted me to get what I needed.”

“Why?”

“Ask them. Personal reasons. Intensely personal.”

“It would have to be. I know them, and they wouldn’t betray anyone for money.”

“But you’re suspecting I would?”

“I’m suspecting you’re totally ruthless and would do anything necessary to move your damn agenda.” She added with sudden fierceness, “But you shouldn’t have involved Lee and Natalie. You’re right, they do care about me. They would have been torn apart by these games you’re playing.”

“You’re not angry with them?”

“We were all tiptoeing around when I came here, trying to find a way to live comfortably together. But then we found that way, and it became damn wonderful.” She paused, trying to probe her own feelings as well as explain. “Am I a little hurt? Yes. I wish they hadn’t had a reason for being kind to me, but that’s life.
My
life. No one is perfect. But they come pretty close. They gave me something very special. They love me. I
know
it. When you weigh that in the balance of the nothing I had before, I don’t have the right to be angry.”

He was silent. “That’s a remarkably mature way of dealing with the issue.”

“I am mature.” Her lips twisted. “In case you didn’t notice, I’m not that kid you picked up and stuffed away in this house seven years ago.”

“Oh, I noticed,” he said softly.

Sensuality.

Heat.

She lost her breath.

Her breasts were becoming taut.

Back off. Back off. Back off.

“I mean mentally and emotionally,” she said quickly. “I’ve had time to think, to sort things out, and get my feelings straight on a good many subjects.”

“I regret I haven’t been around you enough to see that come to pass. I was principally concerned with getting you ready to face the world without having to be shredded to pieces by having to deal with the memory albatross.” He paused. “And I did a good job, didn’t I? During those first few months, I believe you were even grateful.”

“I
was
grateful.” She was remembering those first three months of intense therapy after she had arrived at the university. Recalling how he had talked to her, made her talk to him, she even suspected that there had been some kind of subtle hypnosis involved. Then he had started making her work, showed her how to build walls and fight off intruders. She hadn’t been sure any of it would work. Her mind had been shattered by chaos for so long. Then, she saw that it was clearing, becoming clean and tight and bright with no intrusions bombarding her. It wasn’t a total block, there were still attacks that caught her off guard. But he had made it possible for her to function. The last night, after Mandak had left her, she had broken down and wept. “It was the difference between day and night for me.”

“I know. You told me. I was surprised you admitted it.”

She hadn’t wanted to admit it. Because that gift he’d given her showed he wielded too much power, and she hadn’t wanted him to know the dependence on him she felt. “Why not? You seemed to know everything else about me.”

“Enough to keep you comfortable and give you a chance to open your mind to something besides other people’s memories,” he said. “Lee tells me you’ve had a good life here with a good deal of progress in all areas.”

“He gave you reports?”

“Nothing so formal. He just kept me informed.”

“But informed regarding personal and educational?”

“I had to know how your therapy was holding.”

“That’s a report.” She shook her head. “I’m not going to dwell on it. It’s over. Now I have to decide on what Lee, Natalie, and I are going to do.”

“You’re going with me. I’m going to move Lee and Natalie to a location in South Carolina. I’ve set up a safe house for them, and I’ll have Dantlow arrange immediate security to protect them.”

“You said that you don’t even know for sure if I’m in danger. It might suit you to send me on the run from Camano, so that I’d run toward you.”

“I thought about that.” He shook his head. “But that’s not why I’m doing it. As I said, this is a complication.”

“And I have to be the one to work out that complication. After all, it’s my life.”

“And I have no intention of your losing it after I’ve done so much to preserve it,” he said grimly. “I want to move you tonight, now. I’ll call Lee and explain once we’re on the road.”

“You’re taking me out the window and down the drainpipe?” she asked sarcastically.

“No drainpipe. There’s a roof over the bay window five feet below. You won’t have a problem.”

“You bet I won’t. I have no intention of crawling out there tonight. I’ll go down and talk to Lee and Natalie and decide what we’re going to do.” She frowned, thinking. “I imagine we’ll pack up and leave right away, wherever we decide to go. Though I’d like to go on ahead and have them join me. If I’m not here, there won’t be any threat to Lee and Natalie.” She grimaced. “But I’ll have to see if they’ll agree.”

“I doubt if they’ll want to let you out of their sight.” He got to his feet. “Once you’ve left, I gather you’re not going to contact me and let me know your plans?”