Authors: Michel Farnac
The
climax
unfolds,
in
exquisite
detail,
my
consciousness
dissolving
into
every
pulse
of
my
body,
every
contraction
of
my
muscles,
and
if
for
a
moment
only,
I
am
with
you,
I
am
in
you,
and
we
share
this
ecstasy
as
we
share
our
words……….”
The
fact
is
that
by
the
time
she
saw
his
message
sitting
in
her
inbox
at
work
she
was
full
of
regret
for
having
sent
hers.
Too
bold,
too
raw,
too
crazy.
So
unlike
her.
She
was
afraid
she
was
pushing
it,
that
would
be
scared,
that
he
would
run
away.
She
barely
managed
to
finish
reading
his
response
in
one
sitting.
Trembling,
dizzy,
perspiring,
she
found
herself
out
of
breath,
quite
literally,
gasping
for
air
in
short
breaths.
It
would
be
hours
before
she
could
type
a
reply,
and
needless
to
say
that
no
other
work
got
done
that
day.
“This
might
sound
trite,
but
my
reaction
was...............WOW!
The
content
of
your
reply
was
totally
unexpected
and
therefore
packed
an
even
bigger
punch
than
you
might
have
expected.
I
have
read
it
several
times
and
it
continues
to
arouse
me.
You
have
evoked
some
very
powerful
images
and
the
conversational
style
makes
me
feel
that
you
are
with
me
in
a
very
physical
sense.
Almost
like
an
out-‐of-‐body
experience.”
“What
sort
of
man…”
she
began
thinking,
but
no,
such
a
question
had
now
become
meaningless.
This
was
Michel,
she
thought,
and
she
repeated
the
name,
over
and
over,
in
her
head,
realizing
only
after
a
minute
or
two
that
she
was
saying
the
name
out
loud.
Music,
laughter,
a
prayer,
she
was
as
giddy
as
Tony
in
West
Side
Story,
as
smitten
as
Maria.
Michel.
Her
French
lover.
Unlike
anyone
she
had
ever
met
before.
His
every
word
a
poem
to
her
ears,
his
every
sentence
another
silky
strand
in
the
web
he
was
weaving
around
her
to
her
delight.
There
were
the
occasional
moments
of
fear,
but
it
was
not
him
she
was
afraid
of,
but
of
herself.
Never
had
she
so
willingly
given
up
control
to
anyone,
and
this
was
“so
unlike
her”.
Naturally,
she
reveled
in
doing
things
that
were
unlike
her
as
after
all
that
is
the
point
of
a
prim
and
proper
façade,
but
only
when
it
was
by
design.
Whenever
Michel
asked
for
something,
Catherine,
as
she
now
should
be
called
since
it
was
around
then
that
Michel
noticed
the
unpleasant
imbalance
at
the
pleasure
she
had
in
saying
his
name,
said
yes
before
even
realizing
the
word
had
come
out
of
her
mouth,
and
this
too
was
very
much
unlike
her.
For
the
name
also
she
said
yes
without
thinking,
and
within
seconds
she
was
flooded
with
a
wave
of
conflicting
thoughts.
“What’s
wrong
with
Cathy?”
“Of
course
he
can
call
me
Catherine:
that’s
my
name!”
“Nobody
calls
me
Catherine!”
“Good
lord!
It’s
not
my
name
anymore,
it’s
his
name
for
me!”
“Why
am
I
panicking
like
a
little
girl?”
But
then
she
listened
as
he
said
her
name
and
the
instant
pleasure
she
derived
from
it
erased
any
doubt
in
a
flash.
Soon
enough
she
would
find
it
pure
magic
when
he
would
answer
the
phone
with
her
standard
issue
“Community
Relations,
this
is
Cathy,
how
may
I
help
you
today?”
only
to
be
met
with
a
pause
followed
with
a
suave
“Hello,
Catherine”,
the
prelude
to
often
over
an
hour
of
sheer
conversational
bliss.
And
every
conversation
gave
rise
to
renewed
ardor
in
their
messages,
electronic
echoes
of
their
melding
thoughts
across
the
ether.
It
is
unbelievable
how
time
flies
when
I
am
talking
to
you.
It
is
quite
paradoxical
that
the
more
we
speak,
the
greater
the
desire
I
have
to
continue
the
conversation.
This
morning
was
lovely,
and
how
near
you
felt
to
me.
Almost
as
though
I
could
reach
out
and
touch
you.
I
left
the
patio,
entered
the
house
and
climbed
the
stairs.
There
I
finally
removed
my
robe
and
stood
before
the
mirror.
Your
eyes
taking
in
my
sun-‐
warmed
body,
jewelry
glowing
at
my
neck,
wrists
and
earlobes.
Reluctantly,
I
donned
clothing
and
made
ready
to
face
the
day.
But
your
voice
remained
with
me
and
in
me.
Yours,
Catherine”
“Dear
Catherine,
Indeed
time
ceases
to
exist
when
we
are
together,
and
it
is
always
a
bit
of
a
surprise
when
we
are
re-‐immersed
in
its
continuum
and
find
that
the
shadow
on
the
quadrant
has
moved
quite
a
bit.
So
also
it
is
when
I
write
to
you.
I
have
just
put
on
an
old
album:
Kate
Bush's
"the
kick
inside".
The
first
track
says
many
things
resonant
of
what
we
share.
You
move
me.
This
morning,
you
stood
in
this
open
temple
of
the
sun,
in
full
priestly
dress
and
I
stood
behind
you,
basking
in
your
shadow.
My
soul
sensing
solace,
my
serene
face
softly
seeking
your
scent
in
you
hair.
Then
you
came
up
so
that
I
could
see
you
in
full,
gold
and
gems
gently
glowing
on
your
skin,
your
breath
slowly
wafting
towards
me
like
the
breath
of
the
ocean,
your
breasts
rising
and
falling
with
each
wave.
And
though
each
wave
brings
you
closer
to
me,
with
each
my
body
aches.
You
move
me.
Yours
truly,
Michel”
Far
from
conflicting
thoughts
of
any
kind,
Michel
was
happy.
Never
had
he
written
any
such
prose
and
the
words
flowed
from
him,
gushing
from
a
well
that
he
had
long
known
was
in
him,
but
always
repressed.
There
were
occasional
moments
of
shame,
usually
just
after
sending
a
message,
when
he
would
suddenly
think
of
himself
as
a
silly
parading
peacock
pouring
out
pompous
sesquipedalian
drivel
just
because
he
could,
or
one
of
those
dreadfully
ridiculous
pigeons
in
heat
puffing
himself
up
while
running
after
a
female.
Her
next
message
would
erase
any
doubt
and
plunge
him
back
to
his
newfound
little
corner
of
bliss,
and
soon
enough,
shame
had
been
replaced
by
mild
embarrassment
brought
about
by
her
frequent
reminders
to
him
of
how
different
their
backgrounds
were.
Undeniably
her
upbringing
in
rural
Idaho
bore
little
resemblance
to
his
passage
through
the
elite
institutions
of
the
French
educational
system.
She
was
heir
to
a
long
line
of
potato
farmers.
He
was
a
direct
descendant
of
the
Marquis
de
Lafayette.
But
he
knew
that
she
used
this
as
a
mere
pawn
on
the
chessboard
of
their
conversations
and
that
contemplating
this
did
not
overwhelm
her,
only
that
it
was
an
endless
source
of
wonder
for
her
that
“a
man
such
as
he”
could
be
interested
in
her.
In
fact,
he
thought
of
her
as
one
of
the
most
sophisticated
people
he
knew,
with
one
remarkable
difference:
her
total
lack
of
conceit.
It
was
in
America
that
he
had
been
introduced
to
the
difference
between
absence
of
conceit
and
naïveté.
In
the
world
he
came
from,
that
distinction
had
been
lost
long
ago.
But
from
the
first
time
he
and
Catherine
spoke,
he
had
felt
a
form
of
magic
operate.
With
her,
he
was
completely
open
and
honest,
never
feeling
the
need
to
be
careful
when
he
spoke
or
wrote.
He
could
have
found
it
hard
to
believe,
but
there
were
too
many
signs.
He
was
not
superstitious
or
spiritual
in
the
least,
but
he
knew
enough
to
not
argue
when
the
stars
align.
To
him,
a
coincidence
was
just
a
coincidence,
but
serendipity
was
key.
He
felt
no
need
to
ponder
the
fact
that
on
his
mother’s
side,
he
was
a
direct
descendant
of
Parmentier,
the
nobleman
credited
with
having
introduced
potatoes
to
France,
nor
the
fact
that
her
grandfather
had
gone
to
France
as
a
mechanic
with
the
Lafayette
escadrille,
but
to
ignore
the
pleasure
that
this
gave
him
would
have
gone
against
the
grain
as
it
gave
him
wonderful
counterarguments
to
her
talk
of
different
worlds:
“You
and
I
are
the
only
two
people
I
know
that
have
a
portrait
of
Lafayette
in
their
home.
Most
marriages
are
based
on
less
than
that!”
To
him,
whatever
she
claimed
separated
them
only
amounted
to
the
lovely
idea
that
whatever
they
shared
of
each
other’s
past
would
feel
fresh,
new
and
exotic
to
the
other
so
that
it
would
be
a
very,
very
long
time
before
the
ever
bored
each
other
with
reruns.
He
made
her
laugh
and
that
filled
him
with
joy,
but
more
importantly
he
could
send
shivers
down
her
spine,
quicken
her
pulse,
shorten
her
breath.
Sometimes
he
would
write
at
night,
knowing
she
would
read
in
the
morning
,
then
call
her
in
the
afternoon
and
find
her
still
trembling
from
his
now
overtly
sexual
fantasies
with
her.
She
would
respond
in
kind
only
adding
to
the
awe
she
inspired
in
him.
He
had
never
met
a
woman
so
openly
innocent
about
her
sexual
pleasures
and
fantasies.
He
realized
slowly
that
his
own
libido
was
a
jumbled
imbroglio
of
repressed
desires
strangled
by
years
of
accumulated
misperceptions
and
that
he
was
a
crumpled
mess
of
a
man
stunned
into
disbelief
upon
hearing
a
woman
tell
him
that
she
found
pleasure
in
pleasing
a
man.
Deep
down
he’d
always
known
such
a
woman
existed
but
had
despaired
of
ever
meeting
her.