Read The Plough and the Stars Online
Authors: Sean O'Casey
What th’ hell’s that?
The Covey
It’s like th’ boom of a big gun!
Fluther
Surely to God they’re not goin’ to use artillery on us?
The Covey
(
scornfully
) Not goin’! (
Vehemently
) Wouldn’t they use anything on us, man?
Fluther
Aw, holy Christ, that’s not playin’ th’ game!
Peter
(
plaintively
) What would happen if a shell landed here now?
The Covey
(
ironically
) You’d be off to heaven in a fiery chariot.
Peter
In spite of all th’ warnin’s that’s ringin’ around us, are you goin’ to start your pickin’ at me again?
Fluther
Go on, toss them again, toss them again … Harps, a tanner.
Peter
Heads, a juice.
The Covey tosses the coins.
Fluther
(
as the coins fall
) Let them roll, let them roll. Heads, be God!
Bessie runs in excitedly. She has a new hat on her head, a fox fur round her neck over her shawl, three umbrellas under her right arm, and a box of biscuits under her left. She speaks rapidly and breathlessly.
Bessie
They’re breakin’ into th’ shops, they’re breakin’ into th’ shops! Smashin’ th’ windows, battherin’ in th’ doors, an’ whippin’ away everything! An’ th’ Volunteers is firin’ on them. I seen two men an’ a lassie pushin’ a piano down th’ sthreet, an’ th’ sweat rollin’ off them thryin’ to get it up on th’ pavement; an’ an oul’ wan that must ha’ been seventy lookin’ as if she’d dhrop every minute with th’ dint o’ heart beatin’, thryin’ to pull a big double bed out of a broken shop-window! I was goin’ to wait till I dhressed meself from th’ skin out.
Mollser
(
to Bessie, as she is going in
) Help me in, Bessie; I’m feelin’ curious.
Bessie leaves the looted things in the house, and, rapidly returning, helps Mollser in.
The Covey
Th’ selfishness of that one – she waited till she got all she could carry before she’d come to tell anyone!
Fluther
(
running over to the door of the house and shouting in to Bessie
) Ay, Bessie, did you hear of e’er a pub gettin’ a shake up?
Bessie
(
inside
) I didn’t hear o’ none.
Fluther
(
in a burst of enthusiasm
) Well, you’re goin’ to hear of one soon!
The Covey
Come on, man, an’ don’t be wastin’ time.
Peter
(
to them as they are about to run off
) Ay, ay, are you goin’ to leave me here?
Fluther
Are you goin’ to leave yourself here?
Peter
(
anxiously
) Didn’t yous hear her sayin’ they were firin’ on them?
The Covey
and
Fluther
(
together
) Well?
Peter
Supposin’ I happened to be potted?
Fluther
We’d give you a Christian burial, anyhow.
The Covey
(
ironically
) Dhressed up in your regimentals.
Peter
(
to the Covey, passionately
) May th’ all-lovin’ God give you a hot knock one o’ these days, me young Covey, tuthorin’ Fluther up now to be tiltin’ at me, an’ crossin’ me with his mockeries an’ jibin’!
A fashionably dressed, middle-aged, stout woman comes hurriedly in, and makes for the group. She is almost fainting with fear.
Woman
For Gawd’s sake, will one of you kind men show any safe way for me to get to Wrathmines? … I was foolish enough to visit a friend, thinking the howl thing was a joke, and now I cawn’t get a car or a tram to take me home – isn’t it awful?
Fluther
I’m afraid, ma’am, one way is as safe as another.
Woman
And what am I gowing to do? Oh, isn’t this awful? … I’m so different from others … The mowment I hear a shot, my legs give way under me – I cawn’t stir, I’m paralysed – isn’t it awful?
Fluther
(
moving away
) It’s a derogatory way to be, right enough, ma’am.
Woman
(
catching Fluther’s coat
) Creeping along the street there, with my head down and my eyes half shut, a bullet whizzed past within an inch of my nowse … I had to lean against the wall for a long time, gasping
for breath – I nearly passed away – it was awful! … I wonder, would you kind men come some of the way and see me safe?
Fluther
I have to go away, ma’am, to thry an’ save a few things from th’ burnin’ buildin’s.
The Covey
Come on, then, or there won’t be anything left to save.
The Covey and Fluther hurry away.
Woman
(
to Peter
) Wasn’t it an awful thing for me to leave my friend’s house? Wasn’t it an idiotic thing to do? … I haven’t the slightest idea where I am … You have a kind face, sir. Could you possibly come and pilot me in the direction of Wrathmines?
Peter
(
indignantly
) D’ye think I’m goin’ to risk me life throttin’ in front of you? An’ maybe get a bullet that would gimme a game leg or something that would leave me a jibe an’ a jeer to Fluther an’ th’ young Covey for th’ rest o’ me days! (
With an indignant toss of his head he walks into the house.
)
Woman
(
going out
) I know I’ll fall down in a dead faint if I hear another shot go off anyway near me – isn’t it awful!
Mrs Gogan comes out of the house pushing a pram before her. As she enters the street, Bessie rushes out, follows Mrs Gogan, and catches hold of the pram, stopping Mrs Gogan’s progress.
Bessie
Here, where are you goin’ with that? How quick you were, me lady, to clap your eyes on th’ pram … Maybe you don’t know that Mrs Sullivan, before she went to spend Easther with her people in Dunboyne, gave me sthrict injunctions to give an accasional look to see if it was still standin’ where it was left in th’ corner of th’ lobby.
Mrs Gogan
That remark of yours, Mrs Bessie Burgess, requires a little considheration, seein’ that th’ pram was left on our lobby, an’ not on yours; a foot or two a little to th’ left of th’ jamb of me own room door; nor is it needful to mention th’ name of th’ person that gave a squint to see if it was there th’ first thing in th’ mornin’, an’ th’ last thing in th’ stillness o’ th’ night; never failin’ to realize that her eyes couldn’t be goin’ wrong, be sthretchin’ out her arm an’ runnin’ her hand over th’ pram, to make sure that th’ sight was no deception! Moreover, somethin’s tellin’ me that th’ runnin’ hurry of an inthrest you’re takin’ in it now is a sudden ambition to use th’ pram for a purpose that a loyal woman of law an’ ordher would stagger away from! (
She gives the pram a sudden push that pulls Bessie forward.
)
Bessie
(
still holding the pram
) There’s not as much as one body in th’ house that doesn’t know that it wasn’t Bessie Burgess that was always shakin’ her voice complainin’ about people leavin’ bassinettes in th’ way of them that, week in an’ week out, had to pay their rent, an’ always had to find a regular accommodation for her own furniture in her own room … An’ as for law an’ ordher, puttin’ aside th’ harp an’ shamrock, Bessie Burgess ’ll have as much respect as she wants for th’ lion an’ unicorn!
Peter
(
appearing at the door
) I think I’ll go with th’ pair of yous an’ see th’ fun. A fella might as well chance it, anyhow.
Mrs Gogan
(
taking no notice of Peter, and pushing the pram on another step
) Take your rovin’ lumps o’ hands from pattin’ th’ bassinette, if you please, ma’am; an’, steppin’ from th’ threshold of good manners, let me tell you, Mrs Burgess, that’s it’s a fat wondher to Jennie Gogan that a lady-like singer o’ hymns like yourself
would lower her thoughts from sky-thinkin’ to sthretch out her arm in a sly-seekin’ way to pinch anything dhriven asthray in th’ confusion of th’ battle our boys is makin’ for th’ freedom of their counthry!
Peter
(
laughing and rubbing his hands together
) Hee, hee, hee, hee, hee! I’ll go with th’ pair o’ yous an’ give yous a hand.
Mrs Gogan
(
with a rapid turn of her head as she shoves the pram forward
) Get up in th’ prambulator an’ we’ll wheel you down.
Bessie
(
to Mrs Gogan
) Poverty an’ hardship has sent Bessie Burgess to abide with sthrange company, but she always knew them she had to live with from backside to breakfast time; an’ she can tell them, always havin’ had a Christian kinch on her conscience, that a passion for thievin’ an’ pinchin’ would find her soul a foreign place to live in, an’ that her present intention is quite th’ lofty-hearted one of pickin’ up anything shaken up an’ scatthered about in th’ loose confusion of a general plundher!
By this time they have disappeared from view. Peter is following, when the boom of a big gun in the distance brings him to a quick halt.
Peter
God Almighty, that’s th’ big gun again! God forbid any harm would happen to them, but sorra mind I’d mind if they met with a dhrop in their mad endeyvours to plundher an’ desthroy.
He looks down the street for a moment, then runs to the hall door of the house, which is open, and shuts it with a vicious pull; he then goes to the chair in which Mollser had sat, sits down, takes out his pipe, lights it and begins to smoke with his head carried at a haughty angle. The Covey comes staggering in with a
ten-stone sack of flour on his back. On the top of the sack is a ham. He goes over to the door, pushes it with his head, and finds he can’t open it; he turns slightly in the direction of Peter.
The Covey
(
to Peter
) Who shut th’ door? … (
He kicks at it.
) Here, come on an’ open it, will you? This isn’t a mot’s hand-bag I’ve got on me back.
Peter
Now, me young Covey, d’ye think I’m goin’ to be your lackey?
The Covey
(
angrily
) Will you open th’ door, y’oul’ –
Peter
(
shouting
) Don’t be assin’ me to open any door, don’t be assin’ me to open any door for you … Makin’ a shame an’ a sin o’ th’ cause that good men are fightin’ for … Oh, God forgive th’ people that, instead o’ burnishin’ th’ work th’ boys is doin’ today with quiet honesty an’ patience, is revilin’ their sacrifices with a riot of lootin’ an’ roguery!
The Covey
Isn’t your own eyes leppin’ out o’ your head with envy that you haven’t th’ guts to ketch a few o’ th’ things that God is givin’ to His chosen people? … Y’oul’ hypocrite, if everyone was blind you’d steal a cross off an ass’s back!
Peter
(
very calmly
) You’re not going to make me lose me temper; you can go on with your proddin’ as long as you like; goad an’ goad an’ goad away; hee, hee, heee! I’ll not lose me temper.
Somebody opens door and the Covey goes in.
The Covey
(
inside, mockingly
) Cuckoo-oo!
Peter
(
running to the door and shouting in a blaze of passion as he follows the Covey in
) You lean, long, lanky lath of a lowsey bastard … (
Following him in
) Lowsey bastard, lowsey bastard!
Bessie and Mrs Gogan enter, the pride of a great joy illuminating their faces. Bessie is pushing the pram, which is filled with clothes and boots; on the top of the boots and clothes is a fancy table, which Mrs Gogan is holding on with her left hand, while with her right hand she holds a chair on the top of her head. They are heard talking to each other before they enter.
Mrs Gogan
(
outside
) I don’t remember ever havin’ seen such lovely pairs as them, (
they appear
) with th’ pointed toes an’ th’ cuban heels.
Bessie
They’ll go grand with th’ dhresses we’re afther liftin’, when we’ve stitched a sthray bit o’ silk to lift th’ bodices up a little bit higher, so as to shake th’ shame out o’ them, an’ make them fit for women that hasn’t lost themselves in th’ nakedness o’ th’ times.
They fussily carry in the chair, the table, and some of the other goods. They return to bring in the rest.
Peter
(
at door, sourly to Mrs Gogan
) Ay, you. Mollser looks as if she was goin’ to faint, an’ your youngster is roarin’ in convulsions in her lap.
Mrs Gogan
(
snappily
) She’s never any other way but faintin’!
She goes to go in with some things in her arms, when a shot from a rifle rings out. She and Bessie make a bolt for the door, which Peter, in a panic, tries to shut before they have got inside.