But what if they were clear? There had to be more to this than just drugs. She couldn’t pretend he hadn’t come to mean something far more important to her than a forced mate. It wasn’t uncommon in their culture for mates to instinctively recognize each other. The odds were low in a population the size of Pavlovan, but not impossible, which was why the Oracle was usually necessary to perform the introductions.
“
Are
you afraid of me?”
“No.”
“Mayhap you should be.” His golden stare measured her. “I am—”
“Stressed out.” Mya finished for him. “Which is completely understandable, That’s why I’m here.”
“You intend to stand by the door the whole time?”
“I’m not sure if I should get any closer.” She eyed his perfect chest. “I think I still want to have sex with you.”
He palmed the already hard length of his shaft pushing against the thin fabric of his pants. “It seems I am primed to respond to you whether I wish to or not.”
“Then I’ll stay right here. I’ll never take what isn’t offered freely. You have my word. No one will ever force you again.”
“Thank you.” He paused. “The thing is. You are different. You, I want.”
Her knees threatened to give way. “Don’t say that.”
Gods, she needed him to be the sane one—the one to push her away, and yet he seemed to feel the same way that she did.
He shrugged, which made his muscles ripple beneath his skin. “It is the truth. I cannot understand it myself.”
“Which is another good reason why I should just stay over here. Everything is way too complicated at the moment for us to make it worse.”
Her mind circled through possibilities. What was she supposed to do about Orin? She’d refused to go to the Temple to find their Third, and now she was starting to think that the male in front of her was that very person. Orin was hoping for a Second Female so he could finally have a child. How could she reconcile those two things without hurting someone? How could she remain true to herself?
He rose from the bed and came toward her, pressing one hand against the door behind her head. He was one of the very few men she had ever met who towered over her. With an inarticulate sound, he buried his face in the crook of her neck.
“I am afraid, Mya
.”
Her hand curved around the back of his neck. “
I know.”
He leaned into her, the hard ridge of his cock a hot brand against her stomach, and let her hold him.
“
You will be fine
.”
A tremor ran through him and he nuzzled her skin, his teeth brushing her earlobe, making her shiver in return.
Fine
was such an inadequate thing to say when he was facing a completely uncertain future on a planet that had apparently abandoned him to his fate.
She gently pushed on his chest, and he took a faltering step backward, his hands fisted at his side.
“You are correct. We should not touch each other.” Rekk said.
The thought of never touching him again—of losing her intimate sense of him overwhelmed her. She couldn’t do it. She just couldn’t.
She stripped off her uniform and regulation underwear.
“Mya…”
She guided him to the bed until he was sitting down and then knelt at his feet. This she could do for him. This she could offer him to help him survive. Orin would never criticize her for that. She pushed Rekk’s knees wide, making a space for herself between them, and untied the drawstring of his pants. His hand covered hers.
“You do not need to do this.”
“I want to.”
He removed his hand and she worked the pants free until she could cup his balls and admire the long, hard length of his shaft. With a soft sound, she licked him from root to tip, making him jump. Pre-cum coated the crown of his cock, and she licked a slow, easy spiral around his slit, sipping at him, her tongue delving deep until his hand shoved into her hair to hold her.
“Mmm.” The sound of her pleasure vibrated through him, and she closed her eyes and took more, sharing her explorations in her thoughts, showing him himself being slowly devoured.
“
Gods
.”
Seconds later, he picked her up and laid her on the bed, his broad shoulders spreading her thighs, his hands on her ass, lifting her up to his mouth. She was already wet for him, and he used his teeth and tongue to drive her to a climax.
With a growl, he lowered her onto his cock, sliding home in one smooth thrust as she continued to come. Her whole mind was engrossed with sensation and the sheer physicality of his body moving with hers. She wrapped her arms and legs around him and held him close, enveloping him in her mind as he gave himself up to the pleasure and to her.
“Mya.”
She opened her eyes as he thrust one last time. His body went still as his come released hot and deep, setting her off into another orgasm as they came together.
It took her a long while to notice the lights had dimmed. An announcement was being sent over the comm—secondary power was being activated due to an unforeseen surge of telepathic energy through the system.
“I bet that was us,” Mya murmured as she stroked Rekk’s hair. “How embarrassing is that?”
But her lover wasn’t listening; he was already moving again, his cock hardening with every shift of his hips. She gave herself up to desire. She was alive and so was he, and the space they currently shared was both limited and precarious. If her body gave him the ability to get through the next few hours without fear, she would offer it to him willingly.
After that she had no idea what to expect or what she intended to do.
It was late at night in his city precinct, and almost everyone else had gone home. The nightshift was out patrolling, which meant Orin had the place pretty much to himself. His colleagues were a nosy bunch, and he didn’t particularly want them to know he’d lost track of his Female. He’d never hear the end of it. He stared at the comscreen and tapped his fingers impatiently against the desk.
“Put me through to Major Esca, then.”
“Unable to comply.”
Orin glared at the image as if it were real. “Then whom can I talk to about the nonappearance of my mate?”
The screen went blank and a male appeared, dressed in the uniform of the Special Forces. He had brown hair, pale blue eyes and an unremarkable face.
“Lieutenant Orin Mazra?”
“Yeah. Who are you?”
“I’m Lieutenant Roberts. I’m a member of Captain Jong’s unit.”
“Where the heeze is she?” Orin demanded. “She was supposed to be home yesterday.”
“There was an incident during the operation that delayed our return, sir. Captain Jong is safe and well, but our ship has been redirected to Trenrick Base for security reasons.”
“She isn’t injured?”
“No, sir.”
Orin almost sagged with relief. He couldn’t take another death, especially the most important female in his world.
“Can I see her?”
“Negative, sir. Our entire crew is being held here for debriefing.”
“Why?”
“As I mentioned, there was a classified incident that occurred off-planet.”
“So, basically you won’t tell me anything, and I can’t see her.”
“Exactly, sir.”
“Why can’t I speak to her on vid screen?”
“She’s currently occupied, sir, and will be for some time as we follow landing procedures.”
Orin rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “Is she in trouble?”
“Not at all. If you wish me to give her a message, I can at least do that.”
“Great.” He sighed. “Tell her I love her and that I hope everything is all right.”
Gods, that sounded so banal when his heart was thumping double-time and his gut was twisting with anxiety.
“Will do, sir.” Roberts hesitated. “I wouldn’t worry too much. She really is fine.”
“Thanks. Over and out.”
The screen went back to blue and Orin continued to stare at it. He didn’t care what Roberts said. Something was wrong. If Mya was on-planet, he should sense her, but there was nothing. When he’d woken up that morning, he’d had a terrible sense that he was alone, and it had shocked him to the core.
Had he driven her away with his decision to tell her how bad he was feeling? Was she hiding herself from him and reluctant to come home? He couldn’t put their last conversation out of his head, how defenseless she’d looked while he’d made all his highhanded demands, how frakking stupid he’d been to say anything in the first place…
He pushed away from the screen and returned to pacing the worn-out carpet. When she came back, he’d make sure she understood that what she wanted was just as important, if not more so, than what he wanted. He loved her. He’d shut her out. Not having her made him see that so clearly. She wasn’t the only one who had taken their partnership for granted. He was just as guilty.
Orin took a deep breath. He could fix this. He had to.
Mya showered and scrambled into her uniform, emerging from her cabin just as the ship touched down at Trenrick military base. Roberts lined up alongside her as the main door was released.
“Message for you from Orin Mazra. He said to tell you he loved you, and that he hoped everything would be all right.”
Mya winced. “He’s going to kill me when he hears about all this.”
“I doubt it. He sounded genuinely concerned about you.”
“We’re mated.”
“Ah.” Roberts looked anywhere but at her. “That will be an interesting conversation, although Pavlovans are free to have sex with anyone until a Triad decides to bond completely, right?”
“That’s correct.”
“Then seeing as you were forced into the situation, he can’t really object.”
“Are you trying to reassure me, Roberts?”
“I’m just trying to understand the complexity of Pavlovan mating. We don’t tend to go in for telepathic threesomes on Earth.”
“It’s certainly a minefield.” Intellectually, she was certain Orin would understand, but bonded males were often ruled by instinct, not intellect. “Who are we expecting to meet us here?”
The question was answered when Major Esca came through the door accompanied for four security guards.
“Captain Jong, Lieutenant Roberts.” He saluted them. “Good to see you made it home.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“You okay, Jong?” His keen gaze searched her face.
“I’m fine, sir.”
“Then take me to see this telepath.”
Mya led the way. “He’s understandably wary, sir.”
“I’ll be as non-threatening as I can.” Major Esca paused. “Damn, I can feel his energy from here. He’s right up there with Ash.”
“Yes, sir.”
Mya punched in the security code and led the major into the medical lab.
“Rekk, may I introduce Major Esca?”
“Major.”
Rekk slowly stood up. He was of a similar height and weight to the other soldier, but their coloring was the complete opposite. The Major had black hair and blue eyes, and usually had a smile on his face, but not today. Rekk was making some effort to control his telepathic output, but being close to him was still like staring into the sun.
“I apologize.” Rekk shrugged. “They experimented on my shields so that I could not hide my power from them. I will have to learn how to rebuild them.”
Major Esca winced. “Yeah, otherwise we’re all going to suffer. I’m used to Senator Ash’s levels but—”
“Ash?” Rekk interrupted him. “Ash of the Skysan dynasty?”
“Yes. Do you know him?”
“I am not sure.” Rekk frowned. “The name is familiar.”
Major Esca nodded. “I regret that until we have verified who you are, performed some more medical tests, and asked you a million questions, we cannot allow you to leave this base.”
“I understand.”
Rekk turned to Mya who saluted him as well.
“My team will also be staying until we’ve been debriefed.”
“This way, sir.” Major Esca stepped to one side and indicated that Rekk should join him. “There is nothing to fear.”
The medical offices at the base were decorated in soothing shades of cream and green with inoffensive landscapes and inspirational quotes hung at regular intervals on the walls. In the waiting area there was usually soft music, which made Mya want to scream. Inside this
particular
room was a pink couch with lacy pillows that Mya had chosen not to sit on.
“I don’t know.” Mya darted a quick glance at the silent female opposite her. “I thought that by now I’d be back to normal, but I’m not. And it’s not like me. I’m generally organized, focused, and fully committed to the advancement of my military career.”
“What do you think the problem is, Captain?”
Mya lifted her head. She hated all this psychological shit. Perhaps it was time to stop skirting around and get to the heart of the issue that was bothering her and to hell with their reactions.
“Is it possible that I bonded with Rekk?”
“Well, you certainly had sexual relations with him. What makes you think there was any more to it? You were drugged against your will and forced to copulate whether you wanted to or not. That hardly seems like the basis for a consenting relationship.”
“I am aware of that.” Mya hung on to her patience. “Which is precisely my point because despite everything, I can’t seem to extricate myself from his mind.”
The therapist leaned forward, her hands clasped together in her lap. “His shields have been compromised. He might be finding it difficult to shut off your previous connection.”
“I know that. So, can I just… talk to him face to face, and see if we can find a way to sort it out?”
She hadn’t seen Rekk for three days, but she knew exactly how he was feeling because she couldn’t shut down their damned link. From the moment they’d entered the base, the whole team had been separated, interviewed, and medically examined until Mya was ready to scream. If she had to tell one more person her version of what had happened, she would turn into a babbling idiot.
“Do you think that would be a good idea?” the therapist asked gently. “If you see him, it might increase your attraction to him. It is possible that you believe you are mated to him because you feel guilty about enjoying your sexual encounter.”
“Or it might prove I am mistaken. Between us, we might be able to shut this thing down.”