Authors: Carl Weber
It was almost one o’clock in the morning when I struggled to carry Donna over the threshold of our honeymoon suite at the Long Island Marriott. Somehow we had gotten through the two weeks since she’d announced our engagement, and we’d made it to the wedding. Poor Donna had been so stressed that at times I wondered if she was really going to meet me at the altar, but she kept reassuring me that she was fine. She told me that her mood swings were related to the pregnancy, and the nervousness was just because of the pressure she was feeling to get married so quickly.
At the time I worried that she was really still harboring feelings for Reverend Reynolds. After all, it wasn’t even a month ago that she was in my house telling me how certain she was that he would marry her once he found out about the baby. Again, she was reassuring, telling me that she was over him and ready to move on. All I could do was hope she was telling me the truth and show her in as many ways as possible that I loved her with all my heart. Apparently she was starting to believe it, because she held my arm tightly and rolled her eyes at that piece of shit Reverend Reynolds when he and his wife came up to congratulate us at the reception. He really had some nerve showing up at all.
Now that the stress of the ceremony and the reception was over, I was happy to get back to the room with Donna. As strange as the circumstances of our marriage were, I couldn’t wait to spend a lifetime with her. Tonight was our first night together as husband and wife, and I was hoping that Donna would be more relaxed now that the wedding was behind us. Of course, I was also looking forward to consummating the marriage. Ooh, I couldn’t wait. I figured I wouldn’t have to use a condom since she was already pregnant, and we were both HIV negative when we did the blood tests for the marriage license.
After I carried Donna across the threshold, she sat on the bed and started to slip her wedding gown off her shoulders. She seemed limp with exhaustion. I was pretty darn tired, too. Getting married was a lot more stressful than you would think. I had already ordered a bottle of sparkling cider instead of champagne for the room since Donna couldn’t have alcohol while she was pregnant. I wanted to share a toast to our wedding night before we made love for the very first time.
I was a little funky from all the dancing, so I decided to jump in the shower real quick before we got down to business. I soaped my body down in the shower, whistling the whole time. This had to be the happiest day of my life. After years of wanting her, I was finally going to make love to Donna. I knew I had to be careful with her being pregnant and all, so I decided I would take it slow. That was going to be hard, seeing as how I’d fantasized about this moment since we were teens.
I dried off with the thick towels the hotel provided, then eased into the bedroom part of our suite, the towel wrapped around my waist. Donna was stretched out across the silk comforter, snoring loudly. I noticed she was still wearing her slip. The little bulge beneath her navel warmed my heart. “Our baby,” I said out loud to get used to the sound, then I nudged her gently.
“Baby, wake up.”
Donna mumbled sleepily, “Ten more minutes, Ma. I promise I’ll get up in ten more minutes.”
“Honey, it’s me. Shorty.”
She opened her eyes halfway. “Shorty, what you want? I’m tired.”
“I want you. Wake up. It’s our wedding night.” I ran my hand across her body.
“Stop.” She slapped my hand away.
“Come on, Donna. Wake up. I’ll be gentle.”
“No, Shorty, I’m pooped. This has been a long day.”
“I know. I’ll make it quick.” I was reduced to pleading. This wasn’t exactly the romantic wedding night I had imagined.
“No, I’m tired.” She rolled over.
“Donna, you promised.”
“Let’s do it tomorrow,” she whined, half asleep.
I shook my head and smiled at my bride. “Okay, slide under the covers.”
I tucked her in, and she was back to sleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. I smiled at my sleeping beauty, then kissed her on the forehead. As much as I hated to wait one more day to make love to Donna, I was elated at the thought that I had the rest of my life to be with her.
Tomorrow, it was on. Only what was I gonna do now? After a shower and the anticipation of getting some, I was now wide awake. I decided I would go down to the hotel lounge and have a drink by myself. As soon as I entered the lounge, I spotted Dante. I hesitated to greet him at first, seeing as how we had just fought a couple of days before the wedding. I must admit, though, he did act cordial all throughout the wedding events. I headed for the bar, thinking maybe I would speak to him after a while. To my surprise, he rose, strolled over, and met me at the bar.
“I think we should talk,” he said.
“Look, Dante, I’m not trying to fight with you. It’s my wedding day. Last time you wanted to talk, you punched me in the eye.”
“I’m sorry, Shorty. Things got a little out of hand. Let me buy you a drink and make it up to you.”
“Aw’ight,” I said tentatively. I wasn’t sure what he was up to. After last week I’d learned not to assume Dante would control himself, even if we were in a public place.
“Man, I really hated you at first, but after seeing how happy you were today, I think I was wrong. You really love my sister, don’t you?”
“Yeah, I really do, man.”
“You know, I’m starting to believe you.” We did the brother handshake followed by a hug. “You’re not just my friend anymore, Shorty. You’re my brother now.”
“D, man, I feel the same way.”
I couldn’t find the words to tell him how thankful I was that we were friends again, but I could tell by the look on his face that he already knew.
I felt relieved to know I now had Dante’s blessings. I ordered a shot of cognac.
“Where’s Donna, man?”
“She’s upstairs ’sleep. With the baby and everything, she’s exhausted. I tucked her in and she was calling the hogs before I could leave the room. I thought I’d just come down and have a drink before I go to bed.”
Dante stood to leave. “Yeah, I probably should get upstairs myself. My parents think I brought Tanisha home, but she’s up in my room waiting for me. I better get up there before she falls asleep. Yo, I’m in Room 1206. Come check me in the morning. We can all have breakfast.”
“Aw’ight. I’m right down the hall in 1276, the honeymoon suite.” He started to walk away. “Hey, Dante, you really like her, don’t you?”
I had been wrestling with my conscience ever since I’d met Tanisha at the rehearsal dinner. Dante obviously cared a lot about this woman, and I didn’t know if it was my place to tell him what I knew about her. On the one hand, I knew she wasn’t exactly the kind of woman his parents would approve of. Maybe it would be best for me to tell him so he could decide what to do about it before the news somehow got to his parents. On the other hand, maybe he wouldn’t care what his parents thought. After all, he had remained a true friend to me no matter how many times his mother tried to convince him how bad I was. Maybe I was better off staying out of it, especially since our friendship was more than a little fragile right now. Unfortunately, he must have sensed something in my body language or the way I asked my question, because now he knew something was wrong.
“Yeah, I do. Why?” he asked with suspicion.
It felt too late to turn back now. I had to tell him and just hope that I wasn’t breaking the very fine threads that were holding together our friendship at the moment.
“As your brother, I have something I think you need to know.”
The grimace that came across his face told me that he was thinking the worst. He asked, “You slept with her, didn’t you?”
“No, but I’ve seen her naked.”
Suddenly his chest seemed to inflate and he wore the same expression I’d seen before he hit me last week.
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”
“She’s a stripper, Dante. I seen her working at Scandalous.” My body tensed as I prepared for him to hit me. The blow never came.
“Shorty, what are you saying? Are you sure it’s her and not someone who looks like her?”
“Yeah, I’m sure. I wish I wasn’t. I don’t go there anymore now that I’m with Donna, but I’ve had my share of lap dances with her. She recognized me, too, the night of the rehearsal dinner. I would have told you sooner, but we weren’t exactly on the best terms lately.”
Dante looked crushed. “Shorty, I was going to ask her to marry me tonight.”
I wished I could take back the news I had given him. At the very least I wanted to think of some words that might ease the pain he was obviously feeling. Instead, I felt powerless to do anything but watch as he jumped out of his seat and announced, “I gotta go, Shorty.”
“You gonna be okay?”
“I don’t know, but I know things aren’t gonna be the same between me and Tanisha if what you said is true.” He strode out of the bar like a man on a mission.
I’d been waiting anxiously for Dante to come upstairs from the bar, where he had gone to talk to a few of his friends after Donna and Shorty’s reception. Before he left the room, I reminded him that he might want to hurry back so I could show him how much I appreciated him taking me to the wedding. Things had gone pretty smoothly as far as I was concerned, and now that I thought about it, it made sense. This was Donna’s day, so the first lady was much too wrapped up in the details of the wedding and the reception to have time to scrutinize me. For that I was thankful, and hopeful that things could only get better between us. Who knows? Someday she might actually come to accept me enough to treat me like a person worthy of being in her presence.
Shorty, of course, was much too caught up in his new bride to give me any thought. I stood in line to congratulate the new couple, and though his greeting was chilly, he left me alone after that. In fact, I don’t think I noticed him looking my way one time. He was too busy gazing adoringly at Donna.
As an added bonus, Anita and her husband were seated far away from me, at the deacon’s table on the other side of the reception hall. Though she glared at me every chance she got, I made sure to never head to the ladies’ room alone. When I needed to go, I just waited for one of the other women at the table to excuse herself, and then I followed. I figured that as long as I wasn’t alone, Anita wouldn’t dare confront me. She had a lot to lose if her obsession with Dante became public knowledge. She had a husband and a job to hold on to, and though she was a huge pain in my ass, Anita was not stupid. So while she sat at her table and sulked in silence every time she watched Dante kiss me, I had a great time.
The ceremony was beautiful, and Shorty was so obviously in love with Donna. His face glowed every time he looked at her. I don’t know, maybe I was wrong, but Donna didn’t seem quite as overjoyed. When they kissed after the minister said, “You may now kiss the bride,” I noticed Donna seemed a little hesitant. She was the first to pull away from their embrace. Oh well, she was pregnant, and pregnant women can be moody. Still, if it were me up there getting married to Dante, they would have to pry me out of his arms when the groom kissed the bride. I was really feeling him, and the way he had treated me this weekend just intensified my feelings. That’s why I couldn’t wait for him to get back to the room to experience some of my gratitude.
I took a shower and slipped into this cute little red Victoria’s Secret number I had bought the other night. I sprayed on my favorite perfume, Tresor, then slipped under the covers, waiting for my prince to awaken his sleeping beauty. About ten minutes later I heard Dante using the electronic key card at the door. As soon as the door swung open, I saw Dante’s face, and it looked like he was enveloped in a dark storm cloud. He gave me the most vicious sneer I had ever seen. He came over to the bed, but instead of taking his clothes off like I had hoped, he pulled the covers back, snatched me by the arm, and lifted me up out of the bed.
I screamed. I had never realized how strong Dante was, and I had never seen this side of him. Actually, I was afraid he was going to hit me. His face was directly in front of mine. His eyes were bulging out and his teeth were clenched.
“Are you…are you a stripper? Are you a fucking stripper?”
Shorty had gotten to him before I could. I didn’t know what to say. “How—Wha—Who told you that?”
“No, answer my question. Straight up, are you a stripper?” For the first time since we’d met, he was reminding me of the way I was treated by the other guys I had dated before him. “Answer me, dammit!”
“I used to be. I’m not doing it anymore. You’re hurting me, Dante.”
He let go of me and turned his back, walking toward the window.
“I can’t believe this. Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”
“Dante, please. You know I had to take care of my family.”
“Oh my God. Ain’t this a blip? My father is running for office, and here I am dating a stripper. Everything I thought I knew about you was a lie.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. This man had stuck by me even after he found out my mother was a crackhead, helped me get my brother out of foster care, and insisted over and over that he didn’t care what his mother or anyone else thought about me. Told me he loved me just the way I was. I thought I had truly met Prince Charming, and he made me feel like a princess. Yet here he was now, talking to me like a piece of dirt, telling me that what I did for a living mattered to him above all else. I was hurt more deeply than I could ever have imagined.
Beyond my pain, though, I was scared. Dante looked so angry I didn’t know what to do. To hide my fear, I got defensive. “What did you think about me? You knew I lived in the projects. You knew I worked in a club.”
“I didn’t know it was a strip club. I thought you worked as a barmaid. I didn’t know you were taking off your clothes!”
“I was a barmaid. I was just topless while I was doing it,” I protested, though I knew that wouldn’t make any difference to him.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he demanded to know.
“I was scared, Dante. I just needed more time before I felt I could say anything. It’s not like I was proud of what I was doing.”
“So you thought it would be okay to string the preacher’s son along until
you
felt the time was right? You didn’t think I deserved to know this and make my own decisions?”
“Would you have accepted it if I had told you, Dante?”
He remained silent, which told me everything I needed to know. Despite all of his sweet talk, he was just as judgmental as his damn mother.
“The point is I’m not doing it now. I’m getting ready to start school. I’m getting my life together. I can’t change who I’ve been, so if you can’t accept my past, then I don’t know what to tell you.”
Dante looked at me in disgust, then spun around and left the room, slamming the door behind him. I fell upon the bed and cried like I had never cried before. I loved Dante and I had hoped he was going to ask me to marry him someday, but now everything had fallen apart. I didn’t know who to blame. Was it my mother’s fault for leaving me to fend for myself and my brother while she was out getting high? If she had given me a more secure home, maybe I wouldn’t have taken the path I did to survive.
Maybe it was Shorty’s fault for not minding his own damn business.
No, I couldn’t blame Shorty. I was the one who had purposely chosen to keep this secret from Dante. It should have been my responsibility to let him know the truth before someone else did.
Maybe, though, Dante held some of the blame in this whole mess. After all, he had me believing he was Prince Charming. I thought I could feel secure in his love for me, but he had just proven me so very wrong. Maybe we all shared some blame, but none of that really mattered to me as I lay on the bed sobbing. I’d just lost the best man I’d ever had, and the only one I’d ever truly loved.