“Sweetheart, come here.”
She stopped mid-motion. “Um, are you hungry? Gosh, you must be.
Let me go get you something to eat.” She started out of the bedroom.
193
Lynn Ames
“Jamison, please, come here.” Kate held out her hand, beckoning to her lover.
Jay perched on the far edge of the bed, picking at her shorts with nervous fingers.
“Not good enough, Scoop. I want you right here.” She patted the bed next to her.
Still without making eye contact, Jay moved gingerly next to her.
“Look at me, love.”
She couldn’t.
“Jay, please, don’t do this. I’m sitting right next to you and I miss you desperately. Look at me.”
The eyes that met hers were filled with so much pain, so much agony, that it made Kate bleed inside. “I love you so much, sweetheart,” she said as she took Jay’s hand in hers and kissed it. It was freezing.
The physical contact was all it took for the dam to break. Jay threw herself into Kate’s arms, great heaving sobs wracking her body. “I could’ve killed you. I nearly did. It was all my fault, I...” She couldn’t go on for a moment around the lump in her throat.
Kate pushed aside the pain in her skull, stroking the blonde head, whispering nonsense and letting Jay cry herself out. She knew her lover needed to release all of the pent-up emotion; it was the only way for them to get past this.
“Hey, what happened could’ve happened with anyone. It was an accident, honey. An accident, that’s all. I’m here and alive thanks to you.
Your quick thinking and skill are what saved me. I’m so impressed with what you did, Jay. The guys couldn’t stop talking about it all the way back here.”
“I thought I was ready. I thought I could handle it. I was having so much fun.”
“And you were doing a great job. You just need a little more experience and you’ll be a great skipper.”
“I’m never going out there again.”
“Nonsense. It’s like riding a horse; you have to get right back on.
Love, I don’t even want to tell you all the mistakes I made when I was first learning. Let’s just say that there was a stretch there when the boat spent more time upside down than it did right side up.”
“Maybe, but I bet nobody drowned as a result of your screwups.”
“No, they didn’t, but that was just by dumb luck. And, thanks to you, nobody drowned today, either.” Kate chuckled, reminiscing, “I did get us trapped under the hull on more than one occasion.”
“You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
“Jamison, look at me.” She picked her lover’s head up with her fingertips. “I will never, ever, tell you something just because I think you 194
The Price of Fame
want to hear it. There will never be anything but the truth between us, remember?” The intensity of her gaze, even with eyes clouded with pain, bespoke how seriously Kate meant what she said, and her lover knew it.
“I have made plenty of mistakes in my life, and yes, some of them have been pretty costly, but I know I can’t do anything to change that. I can only live with the knowledge and move on, using those experiences to make me a better person.”
“God, I love you so much, Kate. I couldn’t have borne it if I’d lost you.”
“But you didn’t lose me, love, you saved me. Your refusal to give up on me is the reason I’m alive. Jay, accidents happen to everyone. Did you mean for the boom to hit me in the head?”
“Of course not!”
“Did you mean for me to get knocked unconscious and fall overboard?”
“No!”
“Right, that’s exactly my point; sometimes things are beyond our control. I never should have put you in a position where something like that could happen, I should have known better.”
“How could you know what was going to happen? Don’t be ridiculous.”
Kate smiled, having led her partner right where she wanted her.
“Mmm-hmm.”
Jay looked up sheepishly. “That was sneaky.”
“Well, you know I’m like that.”
“Yep, I do.”
They both leaned forward, their mouths meeting in a dance of thanks and prayer and love.
The next day was spent resting and relaxing in a secluded, shady spot in the shadow of their villa, in view of the water. Jay was tired, having awakened several times during the night with nightmares and several more times to check on her lover and reassure herself that she was really there. As for Kate, her skull was pounding and her body was sore. She was more than happy to hold Jay as she napped and wait for her to stir.
When she did, Kate asked, “Could you tell me a story? My head hurts too much to read.”
“A story?”
“Yeah, you know, make something up, or pick one that you know.
Didn’t you write your own fiction in college?”
Jay laughed. “Yep, most of it was about you.”
“Me?”
195
Lynn Ames
“Uh-huh. Remember how I told you about Sarah reading my journal and accusing me of having an affair with you in my heart?”
“Oh yeah,” Kate said unenthusiastically. “I think I was trying to forget the part where you had a previous lover in your life.”
“Sweetheart, that wasn’t love, that was comfort and companionship.
This, now, this is love.” Jay pulled herself up and kissed her lover in a way that clearly reinforced her point.
“Mmm.” Kate licked her lips. “Okay, so tell me one of those. Please,”
she pleaded, batting her eyelashes.
“You asked for it...” For the rest of the afternoon Jay regaled her lover with the stories that she had created in her imagination about the mysterious, remarkable dark-haired siren who had captured her heart.
Saturday morning Kate awoke far more clear headed, the pounding in her skull reduced to nothing more than a dull ache. It was their last full day of vacation, and she had plans to set in motion. She kissed her lover’s fair head, running her fingers through the silky strands. When that didn’t rouse the sleeping beauty, she took more drastic measures, nibbling her lover’s exposed neck and along her jawline and brushing her fingers ever so lightly over her rib cage.
Jay groaned and snuggled more closely. “It can’t be time to get up already,” she mumbled into a breast.
Kate chuckled. “Well, I guess that depends.” She nipped an earlobe.
“On what?”
“On whether you want to stay in bed alone all day or spend it with me.”
“Urgh. That is so unfair. You know that, right?”
“Uh-huh.”
“But you don’t care, right?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Wench. I bet I could find a way to put you back to sleep.” She waggled her eyebrows suggestively, knowing full well that a round of thorough lovemaking was sure to relax her partner to the point of slumber. She bit down on a convenient nipple.
“Oh no you don’t, Princess.” Kate shook her head as she captured her lover’s hands and pulled away from her questing mouth.
“Hey, I was enjoying my breakfast.”
“Ayup, and so was I, but it will have to wait for later, doll. We’ve got things to do.”
“We do?”
“Yes.”
“Like what?”
196
The Price of Fame
“What do you say, since it’s our last full day of vacation...”
“Don’t remind me.”
“That I get to choose how we spend the morning, and you get to pick the afternoon activity.”
“Sounds fair enough. You go first.”
“Okay, we’re going sailing.” She felt her lover go stiff as a board against her and tremble slightly. “Hey, we won’t go far, and I promise to stay right by you.”
“Oh no you don’t. We only go if you take the tiller.” Jay was terrified and it showed.
“No can do, love,” Kate said gently. “You need to get past this, and I need for you to. Sailing is something I really enjoy, and I know you do too. I’ve always wanted to own a sailboat,” she admitted. “I want to keep it docked on a lake not far away from my house, and I want us to be able to spend time together on it. More than that, I want to be able to sit and enjoy the ride sometimes while you play skipper, which I know you’re going to love. Please, this is important to me.”
Jay couldn’t resist the plea in her lover’s eyes, so she gave in. “Okay, but you stay right by my side.”
“Every second.”
“And then we get to go over to St. Thomas and go shopping this afternoon.”
Kate rolled her eyes and sighed, inwardly thrilled that her plan was working out perfectly. “Deal.”
The day was calm, with not much wind and no chop to the water.
Still, they did not venture out of the shelter of the bay, and Kate stayed by her lover’s side the entire time. At first, Jay was so petrified that she could barely function, but Kate kept talking to her, instructing her and encouraging her, until at last she began to relax a little.
Gradually, the pupil learned how to tack, when to let the sail out, when to pull it in and how much, how to read the wind, how to get herself into and out of irons, heading directly into the wind and then maneuvering into position so that the wind would fill the sail once again, and how to prepare to drop anchor. By the end of the morning when they returned the boat, she was actually laughing and having a good time.
She looked at Kate, who had sat beside her the entire time, patiently teaching, cajoling, and correcting. “Thank you,” she said with as much feeling as she could convey.
“Hmm?”
197
Lynn Ames
“I said thank you. Thank you for making me do this, thank you for showing me that I could, thank you for being patient with me, and thank you for trusting me.”
Kate beamed. “Thank you for humoring me and being brave. Going out there today took a lot of courage, and I want you to know how much it means to me that you would do that, despite your misgivings.”
“If it’s important to you, it’s important to me, love. And besides, you were right; I did enjoy that.”
“I have to tell you that you’re the fastest learner I’ve ever taught. You understand the concepts intuitively, and your reactions are quite good.
I’m really impressed.”
“You’re just...” The rest of the phrase died on her lips at the raised eyebrow she received; message understood. “Thanks,” she murmured instead. “Now can we go shopping?”
“You, young lady, are incorrigible. Yes,” she sighed dramatically,
“we can go shopping.”
“You’re the best.” She kissed her lover on the lips as they made their way into the villa to change for an afternoon of shopping and dinner on St. Thomas.
“I can’t believe we have to leave here today. It’s not fair.” Jay, whose hair had bleached to an even lighter shade of blonde after nearly a week in the Caribbean sun, was snuggled securely in her lover’s arms, watching the Sunday morning sunrise from their balcony. Surprisingly, she had been first to waken and suggest they throw on some clothes and step outside. She turned to see the face she knew so well and to look into eyes that held her soul, eyes that now gazed at her indulgently.
“I agree, sweetheart, and there’s nothing I’d rather do than stay here with you forever. Unfortunately, reality has a way of intruding, and since neither one of us is independently wealthy, there is the small matter of having to get back to work tomorrow.” As she had told Jay before they left for St. John, when Kate had bullied the news director into giving her the time off, he had grumpily given in, but only on the condition that she be back on the air Monday night, the day the
Time
cover story was to hit the newsstands. After all, it was sweeps month, the time of year when ratings were calculated and advertising rates set accordingly. Good ratings meant big bucks, and every station pulled out all the stops to draw viewers.
“Kate, what are we going to do when we get back? I mean, you’re in Albany, and I’m in New York City.” She had waited all week for her lover to say something about their future together, and, now that they were about to leave, she was getting anxious about it.
198
The Price of Fame
Kate rose quickly from the lounge chair. “Take a walk on the beach with me, love?”
Jay was puzzled and not a little concerned about the abrupt change in subject, but, as she was already being propelled back inside the villa, she had few options except to go along.
The two women had the stretch of brilliant white sand all to themselves in the moments just after dawn, and they strolled hand in hand, their feet in the surf and their hearts beating in synchrony.
Reaching an old piece of driftwood a ways down the beach just out of view of the resort, Kate motioned for Jay to sit, which she did, surprised when her lover didn’t immediately join her.
The newly risen sun shone on the blonde’s face, making her emerald eyes dance and glitter. The sight took Kate’s breath away, and she had to pause for a moment to gather herself before speaking. She knelt before Jay and fidgeted in the sand.
“This vacation has been like a dream come true to me, spending five uninterrupted days with you. I never imagined that I was capable of feeling for anyone what I feel for you, nor did I think anyone could ever love me as I know you do.” Kate swallowed audibly; this was even harder than she thought it would be. “I know that as long as you’re by my side, my heart will always be full of love and joy and my soul will always be complete.” She peeked up at her lover through dark bangs.
Jay’s eyes were focused intently on hers.
Looking down at her hands, Kate sighed and pushed ahead. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking these past few days, and a lot of soul searching. I know with absolute certainty what I want, and I can only hope that it’s what you want, too.” At that point she looked directly into her lover’s eyes with a gaze so honest, so open, direct, and so full of love that it made Jay’s heart skip a beat. Kate reached out and took the smaller hands in front of her.
“Love, I can’t imagine a day—no, a minute of my life without you in it. I want us to be together always, not 150 miles apart, not 15 miles apart. I will go anywhere and do anything I have to do to make that happen. Believe it or not, I’ve always been an old-fashioned sort of gal, so I’m going to do this the old-fashioned way. Jay, will you marry me and live with me as my wife?” Letting go of one hand, she reached into her pocket, bringing out a small velvet box, then placed it in her lover’s palm and closed her fingers around it. Jay looked down at her hand, unable to find her voice right away.