Authors: Cary West
“So much for maternal love,” spouted Jack.
“No, you don’t understand,” interjected Clara. “In Marnie’s eyes, Paul was the perfect match for her daughter. She practically arranged her marriage to him.”
“I thought Kate met her ex in college,” said Jack, curiosity getting the better of him.
“She did,” said Adam. “But Marnie knew Paul’s family and set her up on a blind date with him.”
“I never liked Paul,” said Clara, leaning back in her chair and crossing her arms.
“Me neither,” he laughed.
“I thought you two were friends.” Clara gave her husband a weird look, like he had two heads.
“We were acquaintances before Kate,” said Adam. “We had several classes together, but he was a little too stuffy for my liking—
old money
, you know?”
“I know the type,” laughed Jack, and he did.
“But because Kate and Clara liked him, I didn’t make waves.”
“I didn’t know that,” said Clara, frowning at Adam. “I couldn’t stand the guy. If I would have known that back then I could have broken them up. This is all your fault, Adam.”
She slapped him on the arm.
“My fault?” Adam laughed and rubbed his arm. “Hey, I just went along with the crowd. There wasn’t a chance in hell I was going to say anything in fear you would never shag me again. I wasn’t about to get in the middle between you and your best friend.”
“But you got in the middle of me and Kate?” Jack reminded him.
“That was different,” Adam defended. “Clara told me to, and I wanted to keep peace in my own home.”
“That’s sweet, baby,” said Clara, making that scrunched-up face that said she was pleased.
“No, that’s fear.” Jack laughed, knowing now exactly how Adam felt back then.
“It makes no difference,” stated Clara. “Whether it was in fear or for peace, he did it for me.”
“There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for you, peaches.” Adam took her hand and gave a little squeeze.
“Can we stop all this lovey-dovey crap and get back to my problem?” said Jack.
“I thought we were done talking about what you need to do to help Kate,” said Clara.
“You haven’t told me anything.” Now Jack was getting frustrated. He hated it when Clara talked in circles.
“It’s simple,” she replied. “Just be patient and Kate will come around on her own.”
“And don’t let her anywhere near Marnie St. Claire,” added Adam.
“I can do the prevention of Marnie St. Claire,” said Jack, knowing full well that woman was not welcome in his home. “But it’s the patient part I am having trouble with.”
“It’s easy, Jack,” Clara advised. “Pay attention to Kate’s language. She’ll tell you indirectly what her mother whispered in her ear and set her off balance. Once you know what she said, all you have to do is give Kate your voice to set her right again. Replace the fear with positive affirmations.”
“Oh shit!” exclaimed Jack, and he ran his fingers through his hair. “I’m not good at that stuff, Clara.”
“Well you better get good at it and fast,” she stated. “Kate needs you.”
Jack sat back in his chair and thought about what Clara said. She was right. Kate did need him, but how was he to figure out what she needed? All the way home, he replayed last week’s events in his head, trying to decipher Kate’s hidden messages. It was like an askew quest, being given partial clues to the whereabouts of Kate’s twisted mindful treasures. By the time he reached home, he had decoded a few of her emotional outbursts, unlocking the hidden mystery of her insecurities.
He found her upstairs, resting while their son slept. She looked so peaceful, lying in their bed, blonde hair scattered about her pillow. Jack crawled in next to her and leaned on his elbow, continuing to watch her sleep. She was mumbling something in her sleep and he leaned closer to hear.
Black Thunder
, the name trickled from her lips, and Jack couldn’t help but grin. She was dreaming of the black stallion again. It was something he was familiar with hearing ever since their return from setting the animal free. His visitations came in the way of her dreams and Jack thought it was kind of sweet that the memory of the dark steed played out in her subconscious.
He trailed the line of her face with his finger, gently caressing her soft cheeks and jaw. Kate’s eyes fluttered open and a sweet smile brushed across her lips.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” he said in a hushed tone. “Go back to sleep.”
“What time is it?” Kate asked in a groggy voice.
“It’s a little after eight,” he answered.
“Oh.” She closed her eyes again. “Jesse should be waking soon for his next feeding.”
“Well, just lay here baby, and rest until he wakes up,” said Jack, running his hand up and down her arm.
“You’re meeting took longer than I thought.” She moved closer, melting into strong arms.
“I stopped by Adam’s for a bit,” he whispered. “Clara says
hi
and she told me to tell you she’ll be by tomorrow.”
“Good,” she sighed, relieved to know Jack was with friends and not doing something else.
“I missed you, Kate,” he said, stroking her hair.
“You weren’t gone that long to miss me.” She opened her eyes and glanced up at him.
“I always miss you when we are apart.”
“That’s sweet.” She smiled and brushed a light kiss to his lips.
“It’s true,” he said, holding her closer. “I’m lost when I am not with you.”
“Well you’re home now.” She laid her head back into the fold of his arm, feeling a peace wash over her.
“Yes, I am,” Jack smiled. “I’m home with the woman I love, will always love. You know that, right Kate.”
“Yes, I know,” she said. “But it’s nice to hear it from time to time.”
“I’ll say it more, cause’ I want you to truly feel it here.”
He placed his hand by her heart. Kate felt his warmth wash over her skin, radiating down and settling deep in her chest. Jack rolled her on her back and covered her with his body, cocooning her beneath him.
“What are you doing, Jack?” She released a giggle.
“I’m loving you the only way I know how,” he whispered in her ear, covering her more with his body. “Now be quiet and let me feel you.”
Kate felt his chest pressed against hers—hearts pounding against each other’s flesh. It never ceased to amaze her how one man could be so intense in his display of affection. Kate felt utterly claimed as a woman by this man who consumed her very being. The voices in her head quieted as she listened to the love he poured out to her from his heart.
“God, do you know what you do to me?” He sung her praises in her ear.
“What do I do to you?” She beckoned for more as tears filled her eyes.
“You make me feel alive, Kate McBride,” he answered. “I am nothing without you.”
“Oh, Jack.”
“Don’t ever leave me,” he whispered.
“I’m not leaving you,” she wept. “It’s you I worry about leaving me.”
“Oh baby, that will never happen.” Jack looked up and cupped his hands around her hair. “I love you so much that it hurts to be apart from you.”
“But what if you grow bored with me?” She continued to weep, bringing all her fears to the surface. “What if I can’t sustain your interest?”
“Is that what you think, Kate?” he kissed her cheeks, absorbing her tears on his lips.
“I don’t know,” she sobbed. “I am so confused right now I don’t know what I think.”
“You don’t have to think right now,” said Jack. “Just keep listening to my voice. I love you, Kate. I will always love you, want you, and want to make babies with you. I will always want to hold you in my arms and feel you beside me—underneath me.” His eyes twinkled a serious green. “There is nobody but you, always you, forever you.”
“When you say things like that I believe you,” Kate cried harder. “Sometimes I get so scared.”
“I know you do,” said Jack, “but don’t be scared, baby. What we have is real and it’s not ever going away. You have to trust me on that one.”
“I do,” she said holding on to him for dear life.
“Shhh,” he gently whispered. “Now let’s lay quiet together and feel how much we love each other.”
Jack wrapped himself closer around her and drowned out her fear and worries. He felt them lifting away as he continued to pour out his heart to her. In that instant, he knew the voices vanished and all that was left was the unspoken words of their love.
NOT-SO-SAD TIDINGS
Thank God for leveling hormones!
Kate returned to her
somewhat-normal
self, for which Jack was glad. She also returned to work. It didn’t thrill him but for Kate he tried to understand.
Life became hectic, waking up at five, getting Jesse fed and Kate running out the door by seven. It left little time for Jack and his morning routine of making love to her.
Evenings were just as crazy with Kate insisting on making dinners and after feeding, changing and playing with their son, the day ended with Jack tucking his little buckaroo into bed while Kate graded papers. By the time they both crawled into bed themselves, they were exhausted. There was no energy left for anything except sleep, and Jack was suffering on account of it.
On weekends the pace slowed. It was his saving grace, for Jack McBride did not know how much longer he could go without feeling the woman he loved buried beneath him. Saturday mornings was his time
to love her good
as he called it, and he did as many times as he could in an effort to save it up and store it for the sexless week ahead until the next Saturday rolled around.
He wasn’t complaining, well maybe a little, as the new Jack McBride performed his role as husband and father along with ranch owner and snow-removal operator. The ranch season was coming to a close. In spite of the declining economy, Jack made a good profit for the year. It would only get better once the winter season was upon them and the snow began to fall. Snow plowing was big business and Jack had secured the sole contract to plow the streets of Virginia City along with most of the parking areas. Ranch hands turned into plow drivers, discarding their cowboy hats and spurs for insulated work coats and boots.
The winter months were brutal in the small town situated high in the elevation of the Sierra Mountains. The dusting began early in November and by December there was a blanket of white covering the hills of Virginia City.
Jack was working around the clock being called out to remove the snow as storm after storm hit the Sierra’s. Little time was left for them to be together between him being called out to work and Kate’s teaching position. They seemed to manage, grabbing what little time they could, in addition to caring for their son.
Jesse was growing quicker than Jack would have liked. He wished he had more time to devote to his wife and son. It seemed like each day his boy was changing right before his very eyes. He was a busy little boy and curious about everything. Jack had a feeling that once his son found his legs there would be no stopping him.
He was cutting more teeth again, now having four, tiny, baby whites in his mouth. He discovered his power to bite and now chewed on anything he could get his hands on, including mounds of flesh. Jack was amazed by Kate’s strength as she worked with their son not to nip at her while he nursed. In spite of it all, Jack had to admit she was doing an excellent job managing both career and home like it was effortless.
Jack was looking forward to the winter break when Kate would be home instead of school. Christmas time in Virginia City was just as busy as the summer months. Holiday decorations lined the two blocks on the main street along with the street lamps and church bowed in white light and holly. It was like a picture postcard with the white snow as its backdrop.
The ranch was decorated in an array of multicolored lights per Kate’s insistence. She loved the blinking of red, blue, and greens trimmed along the windows and around the front porch.
“White lights are boring,” she proclaimed, instructing Jack where to string the colored bulbs from the ground while he hung tight to the ladder against the side of the house.
They cut a fresh tree from their property and displayed it in the living room. It was the biggest tree Kate ever saw and she loved the smell of fresh pine permeating their home. As a family they decorated the tree, showing Jesse how to hang the new ornaments they purchased. Jack didn’t seem to mind. As a matter of fact, it did his heart well. Never having a tree or any real traditions growing up, it meant more to him than he let on. They were making their own memories and traditions as they bought Baby’s First Christmas ornament and a hand painted one with Jack and Kate’s names written on it.
On Christmas morning, the presents were brimming under the tree. Jesse opened his first, while they took an overabundant amount of pictures and videos of the little boy who screeched every time he ripped the paper from another package. He seemed less interested in the actual present than he did with the paper and bows, trying to place the bow in his mouth and his mother removing it from his hands only to have him scream again.
“Oh he has your temper!” Kate laughed, replacing the bow with a teething ring. Jesse threw it on the ground and reached for the bow, turning red in the process.
“Give him the Tow Mater truck,” said Jack, lying on the ground and capturing the moment on video.
Kate handed their son the truck and watched Jesse’s eyes grow wide before sticking it in his mouth. Jack zoomed in with the video camera and caught his son’s drool, spilling out all over the soft, plastic toy.
“Oh that’s
so
gross,” he laughed. “He’s slobbering it up good.”
Kate reached for the drool rag and wiped the child’s mouth. Jesse narrowed his eyes into tiny blue slits and scrunched up his face. He threw the toy down and rubbed his little, chubby hand over his nose and eyes.
“He’s getting tired.” She watched her son roll over on all fours and start to rock like he wanted to crawl.
He released another screech and reached for his favorite horsey blanket and gathered it to his face.
“He needs changing,” said Jack, smelling something emitting from his son’s tiny rump.