The Prime Time Closet: A History of Gays and Lesbians on TV (34 page)

A character doesn’t necessarily have to go back into his/her past. Sometimes there’s a homosexual — surprise! — right in front of them all along. On
Gimme a Break,
one of crusty Chief Kanisky’s (Dolph Sweet) officers reveals he is gay during a stakeout. “Chief’s Gay Evening” is anything but. The Chief doesn’t appreciate Officer Jerry’s (Eugene Roche) honesty until his friend is gunned down in front of him at the end of the episode (probably because it’s much easier to love a dead gay friend than a live one).
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Another cop who comes out of the closet (and survives) is Officer Zitelli (Dino Natali), who works at
Barney Miller
’s 12th Precinct. In “Movie, Pt. 1,” Zitelli admits to Capt. Barney Miller (Hal Linden) that he wrote the anonymous letter to the squad informing them one of their co-workers is gay. So now everyone knows, except Lieutenant Scanlon (George Murdock), who is determined to find the letter writer. Zitelli’s secret is safe until Det. Wojohowicz, a.k.a. Wojo (Maxwell Gail), is accused of sexually harassing a male suspect after reaching into his pants to yank out a stolen wallet. In defending himself, Wojo accidentally outs Zitelli. Scanlon wants his resignation, even though it’s against police policy to discriminate against gay people. In the end, Zitelli isn’t fired, but gets transferred to an administrative assistant in the Chief Inspector’s Office.
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Homophobia was addressed in a medical context in three 1970s sitcoms. A 1974 episode of the popular medical comedy
M*A*S*H
(“George”) featured a gay soldier named George Weston (Richard Ely), who is admitted into the 4077 with bruises he got from brawling. George confides to Dr. Hawykeye Pierce (Alan Alda) that two guys got beat up in his outfit — “one colored and one homosexual.” (“So you’re a Negro, who would have guessed?” Pierce replies).
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Pierce promises to keep George’s secret, but Frank Burns (Larry Linville) finds out and tells Hawkeye and Trapper (Wayne Rogers) there’s “one of those types” in the camp “that don’t like girls.” Burns threatens to report Weston, a decorated soldier, and have him kicked out of the army. But Hawkeye and Trapper manage to get Frank to confess to cheating on his medical exams in order to blackmail him into not filing the report. In today’s era of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” the episode is even more relevant because it exposes the ignorance behind the discrimination of homosexuals in the military. Unlike other gay-themed sitcom episodes of the period, there are no jokes made at the expense of Private Weston — except from Frank Burns, who’s the only one in the 4077th homophobic enough to care about getting the gay soldier discharged.
On a 1975 episode of the short-lived
Bob Crane Show
, the former
Hogan’s Heroes
star plays Bob Wilcox, an insurance salesman in his 40s who enrolls in medical school. In “The One With the Misdiagnosis,” Bob treats an old friend named Charles Lowen (John Astin), a rich architect who checks into the hospital for an ulcer condition. When Bob runs a glucose test, he discovers Charles is hypoglycemic and therefore doesn’t need the operation. In a newspaper article with the headline “Renowned Architect Lauds Med Student,” Charles publicly thanks his “old and dear friend, Robert Wilcox” for his diagnosis and pledges to raise money for a geriatrics wing for the hospital. The article identifies the “outspoken Lowen” as an active member of the gay liberation movement. Bob worries people might think he’s gay too, but finds himself defending his friend when the bigoted Dr. Peterson (Edward Winter) offers his unsolicited opinion about Charles:
PETERSON: Listen, Wilcox. I know it’s fashionable to accept those people as gay, and pretend that we’re all the same, but I want to tell you we’re not. As far as I’m concerned, the cops should bust every one of them. Just looking at them offends me. The way they talk. They way they gesture. The way they stand....Wilcox, you can say whatever you want, but deep down we both know what he is...a fag!
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Bob responds by calling Peterson a “miserable, pea-brained bigot.” In the final scene, Charles appears at Bob’s door with flowers — not for him, but for Bob’s wife Ellie (Trisha Hart) — and thanks him again for his friendship. For the first time on a sitcom, homosexuality is recognized as a political issue. The episode aired in May of 1975 and was clearly in sync with the emergence of the national gay rights movement. At the time, gay activists were busy fighting to legalize gay marriage, get a gay civil rights bill (HR 166) passed in the House of Representatives, and overturn state sodomy laws.
The third example from the 1970s is a memorable episode of
The Bob Newhart Show
(“Some of My Best Friends Are”), in which Dr. Hartley invites Mr. Prager (Howard Hessman) to join his therapy group. During his first session, he begins to discuss his relationship problems with his boyfriend Gerald. The group is shocked to find out their new member is gay and one-by-one they leave Bob’s office. Dr. Hartley, who had no idea either, shows Mr. Prager his support (but stammers when he tries to say the word “gay”). Later, he begins to understand how Mr. Prager must feel when his wife Emily (Suzanne Pleshette) and neighbor Howard (Bill Daily) make fun of him when he puts on his old glee club tuxedo with the “sissy shirt.” Bob explains to Howard why he shouldn’t use words like “sissy:”
BOB: Howard, all I’m trying to say is we are going to have to change our attitude a little. It’s just that kind of Dark Ages thinking that has kept homosexuals in the closets after all those years.
 
HOWARD: They’re probably looking for shirts like that.
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At the next group therapy session, only Mr. Prager shows up. He is clearly upset (“For the first time in my life I feel sad to be gay.”) The group eventually arrives and tells Dr. Hartley they want Prager out. Bob chastises them for being narrow minded. They apologize and let him stay, but as soon as he begins to talk about his lover, the two men seated next to him on the couch quickly get up.
For some TV characters, the issue hits even closer to home. In an episode of
Doogie Howser M.D.
(“Spell It M-A-N”), college student Vinnie (Max Casella) is happy to move in with Mark (Gil Cates, Jr.), until he finds out his new roommate, is gay and misinterprets Mark’s friendly “I love you” as
I love you
. Doogie (Neil Patrick Harris) advises Vinnie to talk it out with Mark, who assures him he’s not in love with him. Vinnie confesses he’s still a virgin and is afraid he’ll remain one if everyone thinks he’s gay. But when Mark discloses he’s also a virgin looking for a monogamous relationship, Vinnie realizes they have more in common than he knew and decides not to move out (though he still has the need to tell Mark’s friends he’s a card-carrying heterosexual).
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On
Empty Nest
(“Single White Male”), Charley (David Leisure) faces a similar dilemma. He invites a co-worker from the cruise ship, Hank (Douglas Sills), who has just ended a relationship, to move in with him. When Charley spends a night out on the town with Hank and his buddies, he discovers Hank is gay. Like Vinnie, Charley freaks and decides to ask Hank to move out. But when Charley’s date makes a “fag” remark in front of Hank without realizing he’s gay, he comes to his defense and asks Hank to stay. While it’s certainly admirable for Charley to stick up for Hank, the gay man remains silent during the entire exchange as if he is incapable of defending himself.
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Finding out a friend or roommate is gay or lesbian becomes even more complicated when you’re the object of the gay friend’s affection. On
Blossom
(“Double Date”) Joey Russo (Joey Lawrence) gets a love letter from a secret admirer named Leslie. He’s stunned to find out Leslie is the full name of the third baseman on his team, Les (Paul Wittenburg). Leslie gives Joey another note apologizing for making him uncomfortable with the first letter. Joey is still freaked out. (“He used to be one of the guys, now he just gives me the creeps.”) To make Joey more empathetic and understand what his friend is going through, his African-American sister-in-law Shelley (Samaria Graham) shares an incident from her childhood. When she was a young girl, Shelly was not permitted to go swimming with her friends at a private country club because it was restricted. Joey understands (sort of) how difficult it must be for Leslie. So later, in school, he not only defends his gay friend against a bully, but assures him if his father ever joins a country club, he’s invited.
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Another high school student with a similar problem is
That 70’s Show’s
Eric (Topher Grace). He becomes fast friends with his science lab partner Buddy (
Third Rock From the Sun

s
Joseph Gordon Levitt), a rich kid with a hot car. While riding home one night from the movies, Buddy surprises Eric with a kiss. Buddy admits he’s gay, which sends Eric running back to his girlfriend Donna (Laura Prepon).
When Eric sees Buddy in school and asks why he’s attracted to him, Buddy explains it’s because he’s “smart, sensitive, and nice-looking.”
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That 70

s Show
may be set in the era of disco and Watergate, but the kids have a progressive 1990s attitude about homosexuality. All are basically cool about Buddy being gay, including Eric, who accepts the compliment and vows to continue being his friend.
TV adults can find themselves in similar situations. At a bachelor party (“The Guilty Party”),
Dream On
’s Martin Tupper (Brian Benben) finds out his childhood friend from summer camp, Jerry Dorfer (David Hyde Pierce), had a crush on him. On
Dharma and Greg
(“Invasion of the Buddy Snatchers”), Dharma becomes friends with Greg’s poker buddies and discovers one of them, Howard (Hamilton Van Watts), is gay and has a huge crush on Greg. And on
Living Single
(“Woman to Woman”), Max (Erika Alexander) is unprepared when her college roommate, Shayla (Karen Malina White), comes to town to get married — to a woman. Max is upset Shayla never came out to her, prompting Shayla to admit she was in love with her in college, but was afraid Max would drop her as a friend if she knew. Max understands and gives Shayla and her bride-to-be, Chris (Tanika Ray) her blessing.
An episode of the summer comedy
M.Y.O.B.
(“Boys in the Band”) puts an unusual spin on the crush situation. A high school teacher, Mary Beth (Kellie Waymire), jeopardizes her job by having an affair with one of her students, Evan (Steve Moreno). They haven’t gone all the way yet and Mary Beth thinks it’s because he’s shy, but sassy teenager Riley (Katharine Towne) figures out the real reason when she catches Evan having sex with another guy. Riley assures him it’s all right. (“I don’t have a problem with gays. I watch
Frasier
all the time.”) To help Mary Beth save her job, Riley gets Evan to come out of the closet.
Not everyone can handle a crush with maturity and grace, particularly when a third person is involved. On
Love and War
(“Bali Hai”), Nadine (Joanna Gleason) develops a serious crush on her literature teacher, Neil (Corbin Bernsen). He seems interested and invites her over to dinner, only to find out he really has his eye on Jack (Jay Thomas). In “Elaine’s Strange Triangle,”
Taxi
’s Tony (Tony Danza) finds himself in a similar situation. On the rebound from another failed relationship, Elaine (Marilu Henner) meets the sweet and successful Kirk (John David Carson), who tells Tony he has a crush on him. Tony turns to Alex (Judd Hirsch), who has a heart-to-heart with Kirk. Once the air is cleared, the scene erupts into a comical disco dance number featuring a reluctant Alex and a bar full of gay men. Although the scene is gratuitous and played strictly for laughs, it doesn’t detract from the series’s comical approach to bisexuality, a subject rare to sitcoms.
Another bisexual storyline on
Sex and the City
(“Boy, Girl, Boy, Girl”) involves Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker). She is hesitant about getting involved with her handsome new boyfriend Sean (Donovan Leitch), who admits he once had a boyfriend himself. Carrie is skeptical if bisexuality even exists. “I think it’s just a layover on the way to gay town,” she tells her friends. So a paranoid Carrie keeps asking Sean about his experiences with men and is convinced he’s checking out other guys. One night Sean takes her downtown to a party where everyone — gay, straight, and bi (“a pupu platter of sexual orientation”) — seems to have been married to each other. One game of pansexual spin-the-bottle later, during which Carrie is the recipient of a smooch from another woman, Dawn (singer Alanis Morissette), she realizes she really is too old for what she calls Generation XY.
Some heterosexual characters find themselves in even more awkward situations when they are the object of a gay man or lesbian’s crush.
Taxi
alumni Judd Hirsch finds himself the object of another man’s affection on a memorable episode of
Dear John
(“Stand By Your Man”). Hirsch plays John Lacey, a member of “One-Two-One Club,” a singles support group. He befriends the group’s new member, Tony Larkin (Cleavon Little), who divorced his wife after fourteen years because “something” stopped working in their marriage. After spending a week together going to dinner and attending basketball and hockey games, Tony tells John what went wrong — he’s gay. John encourages him to share this with the group and afterwards he reveals privately to John another little secret: he’s in love with him. John doesn’t understand why, but Tony tells him he’s “wonderful, sensitive, caring, and has a good sense of humor.” While John thinks it’s an infatuation, Tony becomes persistent and starts sending him flowers and leaving messages on his answering machine.
Taking the advice of one of his support group members, John invites Tony out for dinner so he can tell him in a public place they can no longer be friends. John expects to let Tony go quietly, but he makes a big scene instead and starts shouting and crying in the restaurant. “You think you’re some great prize,” Tony cries. “I can’t believe I ever loved you!” The episode misses the comic mark not only because it perpetuates the myth that gay men prey on straight men. Tony is written and portrayed by the talented Little as a crazed hysteric — obsessive, unstable, and borderline hostile.

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