Authors: M. Leighton
We ate dinner that night in silence, both of us lost in thought. Later, in the wee hours of the morning, I stirred at the sound of my bedside lamp switch clicking off. Fear rose inside me at the darkness that surrounded my bed until I felt Derek’s weight as he sank into the mattress beside me.
Wordlessly, he wrapped his arms around me and I snuggled into his bare chest, reveling in the intoxicating scent of him. And though his presence was comforting, he’d never been in my bed before and I felt the significance of it, like a nail of finality in the coffin of my circumstance.
The days that followed drifted by in a haze of desperation and awareness. There might as well have been a giant clock with glowing red numbers hanging over my head, counting down the days to my summons. Only the invisible clock that ticked away inside me had no numbers, no way of letting me know exactly how long I had left and, crazy as it might sound,
that
was the most disconcerting thing of all—not knowing.
********
Two weeks later, I sat in front of the Christmas tree, drinking my coffee, staring at the single, cheerfully-wrapped package that lay beneath it. My curiosity was at fever pitch. The gift had arrived last night. I’d noticed it when I’d come into the living room looking for Derek. He was gone when I woke up.
He’d left sometime while I slept, like he was doing more often of late. I never knew where he went, what he was doing or how long he was gone. I just knew that it was making me more and more uncomfortable as the days went by. At this point, I’d shifted from uncomfortable to downright suspicious.
Just then, I heard the roar of Derek’s bike as he zoomed up the driveway. I didn’t move, choosing to wait patiently where I was for him to come inside. And he did.
He came through the front door, carrying a bag with golden arches on the side. He smiled when he saw me sitting in front of the Christmas tree. “You’re up early. Aren’t you supposed to sleep in when school’s out?”
I smiled a sleepy smile in response.
Dropping a quick kiss on my lips as he passed, Derek took the bag into the kitchen. “Want some breakfast?”
“I’m not very hungry,” I said flatly.
I heard Derek’s boots clacking on the linoleum as he crossed the kitchen back toward the living room. “Is something wrong?” He asked, poking his head around the corner to look at me.
I said nothing at first, knowing that I wouldn’t get a straight answer if I asked the question that was always hovering at the back of my mind. Instead, I said, “Where’d this package come from?”
“The store,” he said with a mischievous grin.
“Duh,” I said, trying a brighter smile in return. I failed miserably, though. It’s not an easy task when your heart is heavy.
“You’ll just have to wait and see when you open it,” he said, turning back into the kitchen. “Come and eat.”
As I listened to the crackle of the fast food bag, I tried to push the doubts and reservations from my mind and pull out my most convincing “normal” demeanor. When I felt like I had been moderately successful, I reluctantly got up and went into the kitchen.
Over a sausage, egg and cheese biscuit, I did my best to smile a lot and chat about all the things I might normally chat about. But behind my attentive eyes and easy laugh I was elsewhere, hatching a plan. And though it gave me a modicum of comfort to be in control of
something
, I could feel my mood growing darker and darker as the day wore on.
By the time the sun had set, I was extremely anxious and my heart felt like lead in my chest. I had let myself care far too much for Derek, especially considering that I hardly knew anything about him. I’d let my emotions have free reign and now that misstep was coming back to bite me. And it had nasty teeth.
I was not to be deterred, however, so that night, true to the habit we’d fallen into, I got ready for bed and laid down, leaving my bedside lamp to shine brightly into the corners. I turned on my side and closed my eyes. I slowed my breathing as much as I could and purposely relaxed my muscles, pretending to fall asleep. But inside, I was a bundle of nerves. I just hoped that if Derek could feel my anxiety, he’d attribute it to something else. It’s not like there was a lack of sources of turmoil in my life.
About two hours after I’d gone to bed, I heard Derek’s footsteps. They padded softly across my bedroom floor and stopped beside the bed. He must’ve been watching me because there was a full minute’s delay before he turned off the light and slid into bed beside me.
As usual, he pulled me into his arms and, as usual, I went willingly. His lips brushed my forehead and he whispered something I couldn’t quite make out before he stilled. I lay perfectly motionless until I heard his breathing become deep and even.
I don’t know how long we lay like that. I must’ve dozed off at some point because I came awake when Derek gently shifted and pulled away. I let him rearrange my limbs, making them as heavy and limp as possible. Then I listened as he quietly made his way from my room.
As soon as I heard the door from the kitchen open and close, I leapt up and threw on the jeans and sweatshirt that I had readied just inside my closet. I pushed my feet into my shoes and hurried to the door.
Derek quietly slid the garage door open and I watched as he pushed his bike down the driveway. I grabbed the Camaro keys from the hook beside the door and stepped out into the garage.
When he fired up the motorcycle’s engine, I ran to the car and started it as well. As soon as he was out of sight, I backed out of the driveway and flew down the street after him.
I reached the stop sign and said a silent prayer that he took a left. That was the direction that most everything was from my house so I figured that’s the way he’d go. I made the turn and sped up, looking for the single tail light of his bike.
Finally, it came into view. I slowed to avoid him paying too much attention to who was behind him. I just needed to keep him barely in sight, just enough to see if and when he turned.
We made several turns. Never did he drive any differently or let on that he knew I was back there. I could only assume that I had remained undetected.
After a few minutes, I found that I was anticipating his moves and that was because the roads were familiar to me. I knew where he was going.
Derek made the final right turn that would take him to the forks. I hung back so that he could drive ahead and not see me stop behind him. I killed the lights, pulled the car onto the shoulder and parked, climbing out quickly and making my way across the road and into the forest. I assumed he was going to the clearing and decided I would take a slightly different path to it so that he wouldn’t hear me following him.
It took me a bit longer to get there from my convoluted approach, but when I reached the small open area in the woods, my suspicion was confirmed. There, standing in the middle of the bare trees, was Derek. He was perfectly still and silent, as if he was waiting, but for what I didn’t know.
After several minutes, he finally turned as if he’d heard something. I looked toward the tree line and my heart sank.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Out of the shadows stepped a woman. I watched, spellbound and heartbroken, as she glided across the clearing to where Derek stood.
She was petite, her tiny but perfectly-formed body wrapped in snug black jeans and a jacket. Her long blonde hair hung in luxurious waves down her back and even from a distance I could see the classically beautiful features that the moon shone down upon.
When she reached Derek, she spoke. Though I couldn’t make out the words, I could hear the delicate tinkling of her voice. His response was unintelligible as well, just a rumble in the cool night air. The woman threw back her head and laughed, a seductive sound that made my stomach clench in misery.
She stepped closer to Derek, laying one hand on his arm and leaning in to his body. It was such an intimate gesture, I had to look away. And, though my heart was breaking, I had to know what they were saying.
As quietly as I could, I made my way through the trees to a position still hidden from view, but hopefully one that was within earshot.
It was.
“…my brother. I’ve done everything you’ve asked, told you everything you wanted to know.”
“What if I agreed to give you what you want most—your brother—for the small price of your…
influence
over her?”
I watched Derek’s expression, his lips tightening as an internal debate raged within him. “Why do you want her so badly?”
“She’s going to be one of my greatest weapons,” the woman said excitedly.
“How is that?”
“Why don’t you leave the details to me?”
“I want to know what you have planned for her before I turn her over to you.”
“Nothing you need to worry your handsome head over, Derek,” she purred.
The woman took Derek’s arm and led him to the other side of the clearing, away from me, where I could no longer hear their conversation. It didn’t matter. I’d heard enough.
I leaned back against the tree I was hiding behind and pulled my arms up to my chest. It felt as if someone was literally tearing out something from inside me. I felt the sting of tears at the back of my eyes and knew that I had to get moving before I made a complete fool of myself.
Swallowing back the lump in my throat, I quietly made my way out of the woods and back to the car. When I was safely inside the Camaro, I let the floodgate open, tears falling unchecked down my cheeks.
I sat there for several minutes before my vision cleared enough to drive. I turned the car toward home and pressed lightly on the accelerator. I was in no rush to get there. The excruciating pain of loss after my father’s death had been eased somewhat by the arrival of Derek. But now, with heartache and betrayal marring those memories as well, home seemed more like a place of torture rather than the sanctuary of solace it was supposed to be. If I’d had somewhere else to go, I’d have skipped the house altogether.
I pulled into the garage and got out of the car. Briefly, I considered leaving the garage door open, as Derek had, so he wouldn’t know I’d followed. But then I decided against it. He’d know soon enough anyway.
Once inside, I sat down on the couch in the living room to think. The terrible tearing sensation in my chest had settled to a dull, empty throb and my mind was somewhat clearer.
I debated the best way to handle the situation. Several ideas flitted through my mind, but I quickly discarded them for one reason or another. I thought of my father’s letter and what seemed to be his last request.
I want to find your sister…it’s all up to you.
As I considered this, I heard his voice. Though it was very much just inside my head, it was as if I’d once heard him say the words and was remembering it. Only I was positive I’d never heard him mention the name.
Find Byron Allsley first.
I had never seen or heard of Byron Allsley until the package had arrived after my father’s death. And obviously my father wanted me to go and find him. It was like I was hearing him inside my head and
feeling
him inside my heart. I didn’t know how he was communicating that to me, but I didn’t doubt that he was.
It only took a moment for me to realize that finding him could eventually lead to finding my sister, which was what my father really wanted. And that was enough for me.
As I worked out the details, my eyes fell on the package beneath the Christmas tree. A shard of sadness sliced through my heart. Though I’d never really planned for the future, what with it being so uncertain and all, I guess I had begun to think of Derek as being a part of whatever hovered out there on the horizon. I’d never really analyzed my feelings for him; I’d just accepted them and went with it. Totally impulsive, like I’d always wanted to be when it came to love. No thoughts, just feelings.