The Reluctant Celebrity (17 page)

Jules
paced the room as she waited for the sound of his footsteps on the stairs. She
tightened her grip on the worn copy of
Hikers Monthly
that she’d
borrowed from Mrs Beckwith’s living room. She would be ready for him this time.

A
sudden explosion of energy travelled through her veins as she heard movements
from outside the door. Throwing herself onto the hard mattress of the bed,
Jules opened the magazine, her eyes unable to focus on the pages as she waited.

Nothing
happened.

She
held her breath, straining to hear over the vigorous thumbing of her heart. The
only noise was the creaking of hinges from Guy’s door opening and then closing
again.

Damn
that man, she cursed to herself, leaping from the bed and deciding instead to
confront him. Rich had been wrong about Guy. She wanted him gone. She wanted
her life back.

Throwing
open her door, Jules flew across the narrow hallway separating their rooms.

‘If
you’re here on some stupid quest to relieve yourself of some old guilt, then
you can SOD-,’ she half shouted as she stormed into Guy’s bedroom, her sentence
and her body grinding to a halt at the sight of his bare torso and half-open
jeans.

Guy
said nothing as he put down the can of deodorant he’d been holding, and then he
smirked. ‘I was just coming to see you.’

 ‘Guy,
we are not living in the past anymore. I’ve changed, you’ve changed. You can’t
possibly expect us still to…’ Jules stopped again as her thoughts trailed off. 

‘What
if I do?’

The
smirk disappeared as his eyes bore into hers.

‘Well
I don’t, so for the hundredth time please leave me alone.’

She
twisted her bare feet against the prickles of the carpet and crossed back into
the safety of her bedroom.

She
seemed unable to catch her breath as if she’d just completed a hundred metre
sprint.

No
matter how hard she tried to cling on to it, the anger she’d built towards him
always disappeared the minute his eyes met hers.

 ‘I
can’t,’ he replied as he stepped up behind her.

She
screwed her eyes shut as she felt the warmth of his body against her back.

‘Please
go,’ she whispered.

‘I
can’t.’

‘Why
not?’

‘I
told you. I love you,’ he replied.

‘But
you don’t know me anymore. I’m not the stupid girl I was.’

She
took a step away from him, not trusting herself to turn around.

‘I
know that. But I’m not either - a stupid boy I mean. And I know that I love
your confidence and how stubborn you are. I especially love your temper, the
way your face tightens and your eyes glow. And I love the fact that underneath
it all, no matter how hard you try to hide it, you are still the kind sweet
girl that I fell in love with whilst sitting in a lecture about buttons.’

Like
a million shards of glass falling from the sky, his words cut into her.

‘It’s
not real.’

‘Yes
it is. More real than anything else in the world to me.’

His
response startled her. Had she spoken out loud?

All
of a sudden she spun towards him. He was closer than she realised and still
naked from the waist up.

Her
heart pounded so hard she half expected it to explode.

She
needed to gain control.

 ‘And
what would your publicist think about you saying that?’ she demanded.

To
her surprise Guy’s deep laugh filled the room. ‘Right - two things: firstly
it’s good to see your jealous streak is still alive and well-’

‘I’m
not-’

‘Secondly,’
he continued, ignoring her protest. ‘You of all people should know not to believe
what you read in the papers. I’m not dating Sonja, far from it. I won’t lie to
you, we kissed yesterday. Well actually she kissed me. But all it did was reinforce
how I feel about you. No one else comes close.’

He
took a breath before continuing: ‘Jules, you may not have noticed, but I have a
single at number one and an album release in a fortnight. I should be spending
every second I can doing interviews and performances, but I’m not. I’m here
with you and I’m going to stay here for as long as it takes.’

‘For
as long as what takes?’

‘For
as long as it takes for you to believe me when I say that I love you more than
anything in the world. Until you stop pretending you don’t feel it too.’

His
fingers touched her neck as he tilted her face towards him, his eyes
penetrating hers. ‘I know I made the biggest mistake of my life, and I know
that I really don’t deserve it, but please Jules I’m begging you to forgive me.
Please stop fighting it for one minute and see what happens.’

‘I…I…’
She struggled to find an answer. ‘I’m not sure.’

Despite
her weak protest, Jules continued to stare into his eyes. She didn’t know what
to think.

 ‘When
I’m with you,’ Guy continued, his voice shaking. ‘Even when we are arguing in a
dark hole, I feel complete. When we’re not together, all I feel is emptiness,
like someone’s turned the lights out.’

Jules
stopped breathing. He felt it too.

‘But
you left. You ruined it,’ she cried out suddenly.

‘I
know.’ Guy’s shoulders slumped. ‘It’s the biggest mistake of my life. I would
give anything to go back and undo it. Anything.’

‘But
why did you?’

‘I
can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked myself the same question.’

‘And?’
For the first time, Jules felt none of the anger which had haunted her for so
long. She just needed to know.

Guy
moved his arms toward her, taking her hands in his. She didn’t stop him.

‘It’s
hard to explain, and even now I’m not sure I fully understand why I did it. But
it just seemed like the minute my exams had finished everything changed. Things
went from being fun to suddenly needing a life plan. And I didn’t have one.

‘I
couldn’t keep playing in total dives for no money just on the hope of being
discovered, but I couldn’t do anything else either. I barely scraped a pass remember.
When modelling came up it gave me a way out. I could be an instant success
without needing to lift a finger.’

‘But
what about us Guy, it doesn’t explain why you did what you did, leaving in the
park and-’ 

‘Because
you knew the truth,’ he cut in. ‘You knew me better than anyone else, better
than I knew myself probably. You saw through it all instantly, I knew you
would. I was selling myself out. I wasn’t a success; I was just a skinny kid.

‘I
was giving up on the thing I loved doing because it seemed so much easier to do
that than to try and fail. I thought it was the singing I was giving up, but it
was you. I didn’t want to fail you, but I couldn’t find a way to be all the
things you saw in me.

‘It
doesn’t excuse what I did, I know that. And no amount of apologies or
explanations can change that. But I was young and stupid, I thought I knew
everything, and I’m so so sorry.’

‘It’s
too late for sorry.’

‘Tell
me what to say then. Tell me what I can do to, because whatever it is, I’ll do
it.’

Without
thinking, Jules leant forward, pressing her lips to his.

It
suddenly didn’t matter what he said, nothing could change the past, but she was
tired of fighting it. Every single atom of her being had longed for him from
the first instant she’d seen him in her kitchen last week.

For
just one second, she didn’t want to fight anymore.

Guy
stood frozen, unable to move as a surge of electricity travelled through him;
draining the blood from his head and weakening his knees.

Then,
like a crashing wave he regained control and suddenly they were kissing. Their
movements increasing in speed as familiarity and desire hit him.

He
reached his shaking hands towards her, brushing the smooth skin of her neck
before his fingers travelled up to the silk tendrils of her hair and down to
her waist.

He
wanted every inch of her. The desire so much more powerful than he remembered.
Then she pressed her body against the erection straining from his jeans and
every thought in his head disappeared.

Moments
later, Guy felt a space grow between them as Jules pulled her lips away causing
a desperate longing to rocket through him as he looked into her emerald eyes. 

‘Jules,’
he whispered. ‘We don’t have to-’

‘Don’t
say anything,’ she cut in, tugging at the waistband of his jeans and pulling
him towards the bed.

Time
stood still. His mind unable to imagine a world outside of the cramped bed as
their elbows knocked painfully against the wall in the struggle to remove each
other’s clothes. He didn’t care. The last thing he wanted at that particular
moment was space.

Her
skin felt even smoother than he remembered as his hands roamed the contours of
her body. He never thought it could be possible for someone to become so much
sexier, but Jules’ sleek lines overwhelmed him. 

With
their naked bodies pushing against each other, Guy dragged his lips from hers,
his kisses travelling down to the soft curve of her breasts and brushing the
rigid points of her nipples.

Her
gasp stretched into the silent room, causing another surge of longing to
catapult through him. He wanted her so much and yet he could not let the time
between them end.

Guy
moved further down her body, his lips grazing the slender shape of her stomach.
With a gentle push from his hands he moved her legs apart and continued
kissing; his tongue flicking harder against her, his movements guided by her
cries. Pulling away only when he’d felt the orgasm shudder through her.

Jules
sat up tugging him back towards her, a smile stretched across her face.

‘You
are so beautiful,’ he said, running a hand along the loose waves of her hair.

‘You’re
not so bad yourself.’

Her
hand reached for his erection causing a current of dizziness to sweep across
his mind as her cool grip tightened around him. 

‘Come
here,’ she commanded in a whisper as her body dropped back to the bed.

He
struggled to think as her the speed of her hand increased. Pulling away before
it was too late; Guy reached for the wallet in his jeans bundled at the bottom
of the bed.

Her
eyes shone out at him as she watched him open the condom wrapper.

Gently,
he laid over her, brushing her neck with kisses as his hands lost themselves
over her body.

Only
when he could not wait another second did he push into her; the feeling so
mesmerising that he felt the instant danger of climax build inside him. Not yet,
he begged, as every movement caused another gasp from Jules and an ecstasy he
never thought possible.

The
room closed in and their breathing quickened. As Jules pushed herself harder
against him he stopped fighting it, thrusting again and again until the orgasm
overtook him.

The
same electricity he’d felt earlier by her touch now magnified by a thousand as
the moment consumed him.

With
their damp limbs tangled in the bed spread, Guy’s fingers stroked the ends of
Jules’ long brown hair, which had loosened from its grips and spread in waves
across the pillow.

‘That
was…’ he began, unable to locate the words to express the emotions still
pulsing through him.

‘Yes
it was,’ she smiled.

‘Better
than running that’s for sure.’

Jules’
laugh rang out into the room and she nuzzled further against his chest.   

‘Why
are there none of the weird little brass thingies in these rooms?’ he asked.

‘People
kept stealing them,’ Jules replied as her fingers stroked the soft hair on his
chest. 

‘Seriously?’
he smirked.

‘Yep.’

‘I
like it here,’ Guy said. ‘Cottinghale I mean.’

‘Me
too.’

‘Are
you sleepy?’

‘No.’

‘Me
neither,’ he added as his hands wandered back across her naked body. 

‘Guy,
you can’t be serious?’ Jules laughed.

‘Can’t
I?’ he replied, turning her head to his and planting light kisses all the way
to her mouth.

Only
after they lay satisfied in each other’s arms again did they really talk. It
seemed to Guy as if they’d been separated for five weeks rather than five
years, as if the time apart was insignificant.

A
feeling of total completeness enveloped over him, mingling with exhaustion
until finally they slept.

The
first time Jules felt herself pulled from the depths of sleep she had been
dreaming of paper butterflies flapping in the breeze. The second time it was
the slim beams of daylight creeping through the thin curtains that tried to
drag her from her slumbers.

Eventually
she peeled open her eyes, allowing the feelings of contentment and excitement
to drench through her first waking moments.

She
could not remember the last time she’d slept so deeply and awoken so refreshed,
she thought as she stared at the clock on her mobile, surprised to find it was already
a few minutes to ten. Jules snuggled against the creased space on the bed,
still dented with the imprint of Guy’s body. She took a long breath in,
absorbing his smell. It was just as she remembered.

She
let her eyelids close again. She could do nothing to stop her mouth stretching
into a wide smile as she recognised the sound of plates clattering from the
kitchen. Breakfast in bed had always been Guy’s speciality, she thought.

Jules
drifted into an easy doze and waited for him to return. Her mind dancing
through the memories from their night together.

When
she looked at the clock on her mobile for the second time the first trickle of
fear broke inside her. Another hour had gone by and Guy had not returned.

He
must have been held up talking to Mrs Beckwith, or gone for a walk and stopped
to talk to one of the residents; she reassured herself as she climbed out from
the bed and threw on last night’s clothes.

Raking
a brush quickly through her hair, Jules bounced down the stairs to find him.

‘Good
morning dear. Did you sleep well?’ Mrs Beckwith greeted her from the dining
room table as Jules entered.

‘Yes
thank you Mrs Beckwith. Sorry I missed breakfast this morning,’ she replied,
unable to stop herself from smiling.

‘Don’t
you worry dear. I know the effect this country air can have. I can fix you
something now if you’re hungry?’ The old landlady asked, already pushing her
china coffee cup aside and moving slowly to her feet.

‘No,
don’t get up, I’m fine thank you.’

Jules
felt a ferocious hunger echo in her stomach, but she didn’t want to eat. Guy
would be back soon. He had probably driven halfway to France to find fresh
croissants,
she thought.

‘I
don’t suppose you’ve seen Guy this morning have you?’

‘Well
yes dear,’ Mrs Beckwith nodded. ‘Of course, I didn’t know who he was yesterday
otherwise I would never have let him stay after all that trouble he’s caused
you. But you’ve no need to worry - he left this morning, and by the expression
on his face, he won’t be back in a hurry.’

‘He’s
gone?’ Another drop of panic rippled through her.

‘Yes,
but I thought you’d be pleased.’

 ‘Did
he say where he was going?’

‘No
he didn’t and I didn’t ask. He just paid up and left. Are you alright dear? You
look terribly pale all of a sudden.’

 ‘I’m
fine thanks,’ Jules mumbled as she struggled to comprehend what could have
changed in the few short hours after they’d fallen asleep. 

‘Well
have a lovely day dear,’ Mrs Beckwith called after her.

‘You
too Mrs Beckwith,’ Jules managed to say as she stumbled into the hallway.

‘Oh
I almost forgot - would you like dinner tonight? Lamb hotpot?’

Jules
gave a fleeting nod but could say nothing more.  A haze of confusion swallowed
her mind.

After
everything that had happened, Guy would not just leave, would he? Not again,
Jules reassured herself, desperate to squash the doubt and fear winding its way
through her.

She
needed air. She needed to find Guy.

Grabbing
her coat and Boots, Jules stepped outside, stuffing her hands into the warmth
of her pockets as a cold breeze wound its way past her.

After
one day of sunshine the contrasting chalk clouds made the sky above seem dull
and lifeless. The only evidence of the previous day’s mild weather was a
scattering of daffodil buds that had shot from the earth along the side of the
road; their weak stems swaying in the cold February breeze as Jules passed.

With
her thoughts elsewhere Jules found herself following the same routine as the
previous day, walking along the winding country lane towards Stan’s shop.

Guy
had been right about her. Over the years she had buried herself under so much
hurt that she’d lost sight of who she was. Somehow she had convinced herself
that she wanted to be alone. The solitary work redeveloping properties, the
quiet nights she’d spent alone, and the occasional failed relationship. No
friends, no one to share her life with.

It
had hardly been fun. It had hardly been living.

Not
anymore, Jules said to herself, picking up her pace and inhaling a deep breath
of fresh morning air.

She
needed to start trusting again. Starting with the people she’d met in
Cottinghale - Terri, Rich, and even Stan. They had accepted her into their community
and how ever much she hated to admit it, she would have been lost without them.

As
for Guy, Jules smiled to herself, he would not leave her again. She was sure of
that. It must have been an emergency or an important meeting that had made him
leave so early. There were a thousand perfectly rational explanations, she just
had to wait for him to come back and explain.

A
few minutes later Jules stepped into the farm shop, her doubts cast aside and
her good mood restored.

‘Good
morning Stan, how are you today?’ she called out.

Stan
looked up, turning over the paper in front of him and nodding in response.

‘Did
you enjoy Guy’s performance last night?’

‘Um.’ He shrugged.

‘Fantastic
weather we had yesterday. Do you think it will be like that again soon?’

‘Not
likely.’

‘No
you’re probably right,’ she agreed, picking up a small carton of fresh orange
and a
Curly Whirly
chocolate bar.

‘Just
these please Stan.’ Jules placed her items on the counter and smiled at the
bald shop owner.

‘I’ve
got your paper here,’ he replied bending down to reach for a stack under the
counter.

‘I
don’t need it this morning thank you.’

As
if he had not heard her, Stan folded the paper in two and pushed it towards
her.

‘No,
it’s fine actually thanks. I don’t want to look at anything they’ve got to say
anymore,’ Jules said again.

‘But
I’ve already saved it for you now so you might as well take it. No point
wasting it is there?’

‘Err
no I guess not.’ Jules handed over the money and left. Feeling bewildered by
Stan’s unusually cryptic behaviour.

It
did not take long before she understood.

Jules
let herself back into her room at the guesthouse, throwing the paper onto the
crumpled bed covers and shrugging off her coat. Only then did she see the
headline written in big fat letters across the front page and the photograph
which accompanied it.