The Secret Kiss of Darkness (20 page)

‘You’re not old,’ Kayla protested.

‘You don’t think?’ He looked at her with a strange expression on his face that confused Kayla.

‘Well, no,’ she said, then added with a smile. ‘You probably just feel that way because you’re a dad. My sister told me she aged about ten years when she had her kids because she never got to sleep.’

‘Very true. Speaking of which, I’d better go and tell Nell to get ready. You don’t mind if we bring her?’

‘No, of course not, why would I?’

Wes sent her a grateful glance and went off to round up his daughter.

An hour or so later they drove into the car park of one of Devon’s many tourist attractions.

‘“Canonteign Falls, England’s highest waterfall”,’ Kayla read out loud from the little brochure Wes had handed her. ‘Wow, sixty-seven metres, that’s quite a drop.’

‘It’s actually man-made, you know,’ he said, setting off towards the woodland trail that led to the waterfall.

‘Yes, I know, but it’s pretty impressive even so.’ Kayla and Nell followed him eagerly, happy to be out of doors on such a sunny day.

They passed a small lake and entered a wooded area where the trail began. As they neared the first tiny cascades, Kayla could smell the damp air surrounding them and felt as if she had entered a greenhouse. She breathed in huge lungfuls of the healthy atmosphere. It was wonderful and she imagined the extra bursts of oxygen fizzing through her blood. There was moisture dripping down from all sides and moss and lichen covered the wet stones near the little brook. Further up the hill they encountered the lower waterfall, which the guidebook called Clampitt Falls. The roar of the water was incredible and the majestic cascade tumbled down the hill with surprising speed and force.

They stopped for a while to admire this sight before continuing upwards, climbing the steep path past huge tree roots covered in moss and ivy. The brook bubbling past them had lovely clear water and Nell and Kayla both bent down to test it to see how cold it was.

‘That’s quite warm actually,’ Kayla said.

‘Yes. Can I take my shoes off and paddle?’ Nell asked with a hopeful look on her face.

‘Not now. Come on, let’s get to the top,’ Wes replied. ‘You haven’t seen the best one yet.’

They all looked up in awe at the giant waterfall higher up the trail. The water came rushing over a sheer cliff face and fell straight down, making a terrible racket. It reminded Kayla of a huge, silver-coloured rippling ponytail and it was a lovely sight.

‘This is beautiful!’ Kayla exclaimed. ‘Thank you for bringing us here, Wes.’

He smiled at her and sent her a teasing glance. ‘You probably won’t thank me after I make you walk to the top of the hill.’

‘The top? You mean we’re going further up?’

‘Yep. Come on, this way.’ He took Nell’s hand and led the way up a narrow path. Kayla felt as if the forest was closing in on her as they followed the trail ever higher. They discovered there was a smaller fall behind the big one, but the path continued past this and upwards. They finally reached the so called ‘Buzzard’s View’ at the top of the waterfall and stopped to look down, panting slightly from the steep climb.

‘Oh, Daddy, everyone’s really tiny down there, just like dolls.’ Nell pointed to some people way below them on the path. Kayla had to agree they did seem quite far away, but she preferred not to look down for too long. Suddenly dizzy, she turned to continue along the path, anxious to get away from the drop. Little bubbles of panic rose up inside her, although she tried her best to stop them.

‘Oh God, I can’t look at that. I’ll wait for you further down,’ she called and stumbled away without waiting for an answer. She kept to the trail, which was rather dark in places under the dense foliage, and quite steep and slippery at times as well. Kayla had to concentrate very hard so as not to fall and soon stopped to catch her breath and wait for the others. She leaned against a trunk and closed her eyes for a moment. She hadn’t realised the height would have such an effect on her.

‘There you are, Kayla.’ She opened her eyes and tried to muster a smile for Wes, who had caught up with her, but her smile turned to a frown at his next words. ‘But where’s Nell?’

‘I thought she was with you. I left you at the top. I told you I couldn’t stomach the height.’

‘Yes, but she wanted to follow you, so I told her to stay close. In fact, I’m pretty sure she was right behind you.’ Wes swore under his breath and Kayla felt her chest tightening with fear. ‘Damn, I knew I should have kept hold of her hand.’

‘Oh, no!’ Kayla felt helpless and larger tentacles of panic groped at her insides. She swallowed hard and tried to think rationally. ‘There are only two ways down from here – this way or the way we came. Let’s go down one side each and meet at the bottom. One of us is bound to come across her. She can’t have gone far.’

‘Yes, you’re right. And when I find her she’s going to get a good talking to, I can tell you. She knows not to wander off on her own. I’ve told her a hundred times at least.’ Kayla could hear the frustration and fear in his voice, but didn’t comment. She felt the same and Nell wasn’t even her child.

Wes stalked off in the direction from which they had come and Kayla continued along the trail she’d been following. The forest suddenly didn’t seem as appealing as before – she found the darkness oppressive, the humidity unbearable and the path too muddy and slippery. It also felt as if it was never-ending and Kayla gritted her teeth in frustration. Every few yards she called Nell’s name, but there was no reply. An icy lump settled in her stomach, making her feel nauseous. Where the hell could she be?

Visions of small bodies floating in water or lying lifeless at the bottom of a long hill started to torment her and she hurried on. She tripped over a tree root and hurt her ankle, but kept going all the same. There was no time to lose.

With a sigh of relief she finally emerged into the sunlight at the bottom of the hill, only to be met by a despondent-looking Wes. He shook his head at her unspoken question.

‘Oh, Wes, what are we going to do?’ She took his hand to comfort him and he squeezed it gratefully.

‘I don’t know. I suppose we’ll have to alert the staff so they can organise a search party. Like you said, she can’t have gone far. She’s got to be here somewhere. Let’s go over to the office.’

They headed for the buildings, which housed a café and gift shop, at a half-run, hoping to find the staff office nearby. In the courtyard next to the play area, however, Wes came to such an abrupt halt that Kayla bumped into him.

‘Wes, what’s the matter?’ she said uncertainly.

‘Nell!’ he exclaimed and rushed forward. ‘Nell, you’re all right.’

Kayla stared in surprise as he ran over to hug his daughter who was sitting at a table eating ice cream next to an elegant woman with short, honey-coloured hair. ‘God, you gave me such a fright. Where have you been?’

‘Well, I was—’ Nell started to say, but was cut short by the woman who fixed them all with an icy glare.

‘Really, Wes, you should look after our daughter better. I found her wandering around all by herself in the forest without supervision. Honestly, it’s enough to make me want to go back to court. I’m sure the judge would be interested in this little tale.’ She smiled smugly and Kayla had a sudden urge to slap the woman’s face. So this was Caroline, she thought.

Kayla put her hands in the pockets of her faded jeans and studied Wes’s ex-wife. She had to admit the woman was beautiful, in the manner of a sleek, but lethal, cat. She had the most incredible complexion and enormous, almond-shaped brown eyes. Kayla thought Caroline looked completely out of place, however, since she was wearing a pale designer outfit, sandals and lots of chunky jewellery. Nearly everyone around them wore shorts or jeans and T-shirts, not to mention sensible walking shoes.

Wes scowled at Caroline and a muscle jumped in his cheek, making Kayla realise he was holding his temper in check, but only just. ‘Well, what a coincidence that you should “happen” to walk by in the forest,’ he retorted. ‘That’s got to be a first. I don’t recall you ever wanting to trek through the woods before. I hope you didn’t get your fancy clothes dirty or your shoes stuck in the mud.’ He threw a scornful glance at her footwear, which on closer inspection did look rather muddy.

‘Yes, isn’t it a coincidence? I really felt I ought to take in a few of the tourist sights before I leave on my next trip. One can’t possibly have lived in Devon without at least visiting Canonteign Falls, or so I’ve been told.’

Wes ignored his ex-wife and hugged Nell again, burying his face in her hair. ‘I’m so glad you’re safe, sweetie. It was lucky you found Mummy, eh?’ Kayla admired the way he kept his tone even. It must have taken a lot of self-control.

‘Yes, but—’ Nell was cut short by her mother for a second time. Caroline didn’t seem to want to hear her daughter’s views on anything.

‘Aren’t you going to introduce me to your new, er, friend?’ Caroline purred while looking Kayla up and down as if she were some kind of vermin. Kayla stared back defiantly. Caroline had no right to look so superior.

‘This is Kayla Sinclair, my secretary. Kayla this is Caroline, Nell’s mother.’ Wes was very obviously reluctant to perform the introductions, as he did so in a wooden tone of voice. ‘I think we’d better be going now though. It’s getting late. If you’ll excuse us, Caroline?’

‘I suppose so, since I don’t seem to have any rights any more.’ Caroline glared at Wes a final time before standing up. She was almost as tall as her ex-husband and with a very slender figure. Kayla clenched her fists inside her pockets. The woman must be at least a head taller than herself and so elegant. It made her feel small and insignificant. Not to mention overweight, even though she knew well enough that she wasn’t. In short, Caroline made her want to gnash her teeth. And she still had an urge to slap her.

After an exaggerated goodbye to her daughter, Caroline swept off towards the car park and the others followed more slowly. Kayla trailed behind Wes and his daughter despondently. All her joy in the outing had evaporated as fast as the water in the forest.

It occurred to her to wonder why Caroline should have annoyed her so much, since it was really none of her business. She knew that because she liked Wes, she had immediately taken his side, although unconsciously. But if she was perfectly honest, there was more to it than that. She sighed. Perhaps she ought to leave before her attraction to Wes got out of control? After all, he had stated categorically that he would never marry again, so there was no hope of him ever reciprocating any feelings she may have for him. He might want to have a fling, or relationship of some sort, but Kayla knew it would never be enough for her. No, it would surely be better to go away and try to make a new life for herself somewhere else. The only problem was, she didn’t want to leave. With a heavy heart, she climbed into the car.

The free-traders moved quietly and efficiently, unloading the cargo onto the beach in the dark. They were all sure-footed and had no need for torches. They knew this stretch of the coast like the back of their hands and each man knew precisely what to do and carried out his duties in silence.

Jago worked side by side with his men, doing his fair share. It had been another good run, but he was relieved it was nearly finished. Although he knew Eliza had come through her ordeal, and she and the baby were both fine, he couldn’t stop thinking about them. He ought to be concentrating on the smuggling operation, but found it difficult. It required him to be alert for any possible danger, and it was with a great deal of effort he put Eliza out of his mind for long enough to do what he had to. Since he would never willingly jeopardise his men, somehow he managed it. The operation was a success.

The sea was calm and the soft murmur of the waves lapping gently onto the shore was the only sound to be heard, apart from the occasional grunt as one of the men hefted a particularly heavy burden onto his shoulders. The breeze was gentle, if somewhat cold, despite the fact that they were almost at the end of March. Even so, Jago felt the tension build up inside him. Something wasn’t right. Everything was too quiet. He stopped to listen and scan the surrounding cliffs as best he could in the dark, but he couldn’t see anything threatening.

He had just bent back to his task when suddenly he heard voices somewhere at the top of the cliffs. He couldn’t make out any actual words, nor see anyone, but soon after, the air was rent by a scream of pure terror. A woman’s scream which seemed to go on for a very long time, then was cut off abruptly.

All the men froze for an instant, before looking around frantically. A loud thump had been heard about twenty yards along the beach, and everyone ran for cover to hide wherever they could. A woman’s scream usually meant that one of the look-outs had spotted the Excise men and was giving the free-traders warning. Many of the village women acted as look-outs while their menfolk were about their dangerous business. It gave them something to do while waiting.

Jago ran with the rest, leaving the cargo half unloaded on the beach and the boat unmanned. He threw himself down behind a boulder and waited for the thunder of hooves along the path up above, which would signal the arrival of the Excise men. With a bit of luck they wouldn’t see anything unusual and ride past as had happened on previous occasions. If not, well the free-traders would simply have to abandon the goods and run for their lives.

Time passed and nothing happened. Jago became more and more uneasy. He still had a niggling feeling that something was very wrong. If there had been Excise men they should have arrived by now. He remembered the strange thumping noise and decided to investigate. On all fours he crawled in that direction, slowly, inch by sandy inch, then stopped abruptly as his hands touched something soft. Something warm and human. A flowery fragrance rose to tease his nostrils, and he drew in a deep, shaky breath. He knew that scent all too well. Would know it anywhere. A vice clamped around his heart and he felt as if it stopped beating altogether.

‘Oh, no,’ he whispered hoarsely. ‘Oh, dear God, no!’ On legs which felt almost numb, he ran quickly to the little boat and fetched the lantern they had used for signalling earlier on. With trembling hands he managed to open its shutter, while his men came out of their hiding places one by one.

‘What is it, Jago? What’re you doing?’ his best friend Matthew hissed, looking around anxiously. ‘You’re never using the lantern, man?’

‘Follow me,’ was all Jago managed to say, and the men trooped behind him over to the body lying so still on the sand. Jago directed the beam of light at the face and there was a collective gasp as they all realised who it was, staring with unseeing eyes into the black night sky. They looked at Jago, uncertain how he would react, but he had already known. It couldn’t be anyone other than Eliza. And it was all his fault.

He knelt in the sand beside her body and leaned his forehead on her chest. Not a sound came out of his throat, although he wanted to scream and roar and shout his protests and apologies to the heavens. If only he’d resisted her, this would never have happened. If only he’d been stronger, she would still be alive. But she had been so beautiful, so exactly the kind of woman he wanted. And she had wanted him. Tempted him beyond reason.

‘Dear God,’ someone whispered. ‘What’ll we do?’

He suddenly remembered the baby and shone the beam of light round the surrounding area. To his relief there was nothing there.
Thank the Lord for small mercies!
He wondered what had become of the child, but for the moment there was no way of finding out. He prayed the little mite was safe with his nursemaid. Thinking back he knew he’d only heard one thump. He swallowed hard, clenching his fists around a handful of sand until he felt the grains hurting his palms.

‘Jago.’ Matthew touched his shoulder gently. ‘Jago, we must get away from here. ‘Tisn’t safe. Shall we take her with us?’

Jago looked up at his friend and the rest of the men and saw that they shared his pain. They’d all known about Eliza and no one blamed him. But it was still his fault. With a heart as heavy as a boulder, he stood up. There were tears frozen inside him, but he couldn’t allow them to surface now. Time for that later.

‘Yes,’ he whispered. ‘Put her in the boat, please. Her murderer will pay for this, but first we must take care of the goods. Let’s get to it, men.’

They continued with their tasks as swiftly as possible, and dispersed to hide the cargo in various places. Jago and Matthew stayed behind and pushed the big boat into the water. They began to row towards the village along the coast. If Sir John came to look for the body in the morning, he wouldn’t find it.

Serve him right.

After dinner that evening Wes went off to have a long talk with Nell and Kayla settled down with a good book in the library-cum-office. There was a particularly comfortable sofa in there that felt as if it had been made for reading on. Soon Wes returned, however, and she looked up to try and judge his mood. He seemed subdued, but came to sit near her.

‘Is she all right?’ Kayla asked, putting her book down on the floor next to the sofa.

‘Yes. Yes, she’s okay.’ Wes ran a hand through his dark hair, a gesture Kayla was becoming very familiar with. It made her want to push her own fingers through the shiny strands, but she resisted the impulse.

‘That’s good.’

‘Mm-hm. I’m not sure I am though. Okay, I mean. Her disappearance scared the shit out of me, to be honest. Not quite the kind of outing I’d envisaged.’

‘Scared me too. I kept imagining all sorts of horrible things, and all the time she was happily eating ice cream.’

Wes shook his head. ‘Nell didn’t just wander off, you know. She told me Caroline was standing behind a bush, beckoning to her and then she made her go down the hill with her without telling me. It was all done on purpose.’

Kayla frowned. ‘I thought it was a strange coincidence that she should be there at the same time as us and just happen to find her own daughter in the forest.’

‘Coincidence my foot. She somehow found out we were going and staged the whole thing. Or maybe she followed us and it was done on the spur of the moment. What I can’t figure out though is why? Is she just trying to spite me? Get revenge of some sort? Or simply scare the living daylights out of me? If Caro is going to start doing stupid things like this, I’ll have to have Nell watched twenty-four seven. I have no idea how I’m going to do that unless I hire a bodyguard or something. And that sounds ridiculous!’

Kayla took his hand and gave it a sympathetic squeeze. ‘Maybe it was a one-off occurrence? Caroline has had her little joke at your expense now and the reaction she got must have been more than satisfactory. Let’s hope that’s enough. Surely she wouldn’t want to hurt her own daughter?’

He laced his fingers with hers and held on briefly before letting go. ‘No, I should hope not. But she’s out of her mind on drugs half the time. God knows she shouldn’t even be driving, let alone traipsing around the countryside. If only she’d get help, but she doesn’t think she’s addicted, won’t acknowledge it. She keeps saying the medication is just to keep her on an even keel.’

‘Isn’t it?’

‘Well, that’s how it started out, but I’m pretty sure it’s a lot more than that now. She may even be taking real drugs. Who knows? There’s nothing I can do though. I have no legal right to interfere in her life.’

For a while they sat in silence, then Wes sighed deeply and stood up. ‘I’m sorry, I’m not very good company tonight so I think I’ll just go to bed. Thanks for your support anyway.’

‘Any time,’ Kayla mumbled after his retreating back and wished that she had the right to comfort him properly.

Wes stood looking down on his daughter, sleeping the heavy, innocent sleep that only children manage. He was swamped by the overwhelming feelings of love for this tiny being. He didn’t know how it was possible to care so much for someone and at the same time hate how scared it made him feel. The burden of responsibility was just too much sometimes.

Drawing in a deep breath he tried not to remember how close he’d come to losing Nell that afternoon. Even though it had been an illusion and she’d been safe the entire time, he knew now he could never let her go. If Caro thought she could manipulate him into having the custody order overturned, she was sorely mistaken.

Nell was staying right here.

Wes clenched his fists, then thrust his hands into his pockets. Caro. How had things gone so wrong between them? There had been a time when he’d looked at her with almost as much love as he did with Nell now. A different kind of love, but she’d been his world too. For a short while. But Caro wasn’t the woman he’d thought she was. What you saw was only a façade.

He’d realised it after Nell was born. The birth had been difficult and for the first day or two Caroline had been in a state of shock and too much pain to take much notice of either her surroundings or her child. When at last he brought the baby to her, she looked massively disappointed and he remembered their subsequent conversation clearly.

‘Oh, it’s not a boy,’ she said. ‘Sorry.’

‘Don’t be silly.’ He smiled at her and put their child in her arms. ‘Why wouldn’t we want a girl? Look, she’s beautiful.’

Caro gazed at the baby and Wes thought he saw an expression of distaste pass over her features. ‘You wanted a boy,’ she muttered, ‘to inherit the title.’

Wes tried to keep a lid on the impatience rising inside him. Caro had been through an ordeal, he had to make allowances. ‘It doesn’t matter. The main thing is she’s healthy. And she’s adorable. See how she grips your finger if you put it in her hand?’ He felt besotted himself and couldn’t understand why Caro didn’t immediately fall for the baby the same way he’d done. ‘There’s plenty of time for more children,’ he added unwisely.

Caro started to sob. ‘No! I knew it. You want me to go through all this agony again so you can have your Marcombe heir. I can’t bear it.’

‘Caro! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean … Hey, don’t cry. The midwife tells me all women feel that way at first, but it will pass. And if not, well, then we won’t have any more kids. Honestly, it will be fine. There’s always Alex.’

And Wes had believed it at the time. However, over the next few days he’d tried over and over again to make Caro take an interest in their little girl, but she never did. Instead she seemed to begrudge the time he spent with Nell, as if she was jealous of her own child. He almost thought she hated the little human scrap who had unwittingly come between them.

She tried to hide it at first, but in her weakened state she couldn’t stop the querulous remarks that put Wes out of all patience with her. He spent more and more time with the baby, doing all the things she should have done. Caro accused him of usurping her role, of turning soft.

‘Well, what am I supposed to do?’ he shot back. ‘You’re not strong enough yet. Someone has to take care of her.’

But it was the beginning of the end. It wasn’t long before their marriage began to disintegrate. For a few years they had managed to keep up the appearance of married life, although virtually living apart. Caro spent an increasing amount of time in London, where Wes later learned that she drowned her sorrows first with alcohol, then later with pills of varying kinds. When Wes found out about the drugs, however, he put his foot down. He told her to give it up or he’d divorce her. When she refused he began divorce proceedings. To her fury, everything had gone his way.

‘I never wanted it to be like this,’ Wes whispered into the darkness. But he would fight for Nell, no matter what.

And he wouldn’t let Caro win because he knew she didn’t love her own child.

Kayla was woken by a small sniffling noise and peered into the darkness, her heart beating a tattoo of fear until she guessed who it was.

‘Nell, is that you?’

‘Mm-hmm.’

‘What’s the matter? Come here and tell me what’s wrong.’

Nell appeared by her bedside, a small dark shape in the faint moonlight, and sat down on the cover next to Kayla. ‘Can I sleep in your bed for a while, please?’ she asked.