Authors: Eve Montelibano
“My God. You are hopeless, indeed,” she said in a teasing tone.
He shrugged. “Guilty.”
Her heart ached for him. Her beloved. So handsome, like a modern day prince. She had loved him the first time she saw him. She’d dreamed of nothing but being here, in this very moment, where he was sharing a part of him to her. She had been looking forward to his good parts and she was ill-prepared for his bad parts. But she was getting the hang of it.
Unknowingly, he was doing his best to kill her love for him, but no matter what, she refused to give up on him. “Almost,” she said softly.
“Almost?”
Such coldness, and yet she knew his passion. She had felt it in his kisses, in his touch. It was scorching. Addictive. This was probably what all those other women also found irresistible in him, his elusiveness, his remoteness. He had this aura of impenetrability and yet his celebrity made him an open book, giving a false notion of accessibility.
The contradiction in his personality was a huge challenge, beckoning her to try and pierce his armor, to break down his walls. Her entire being was clamoring for it, to melt the ice that bound his soul, to turn him into the warm, loving man of her dreams.
She pushed his buttons a bit. “I think you are the one who is veiling your innermost desires in ironclad contracts. You are afraid to acknowledge your true nature.”
Wrong move.
His eyes went colder, freezing and shutting everything out, his walls, rising higher.
Oh Dare…please, let me in. Let me in.
Just then, their dinner arrived in a trolley full of sumptuous-looking concoctions accompanied by a waiter and a blond Caucasian woman in a chef’s garb.
She exhaled slowly, glad for the interruption.
“Dare, thank you for waiting. I hope it is to your liking.”
“I have no doubt on that score, Carolynn. By the way, meet Celine, my secretary.”
Carolynn? Could this be the celebrated Carolynn Spence?
The chef smiled at her. “Hello.”
Yes, it’s really her!
She shook hands with Carolynn.
“I hope this is just the first of many visits, Celine. Dare is a regular here.”
“So, I’ve heard.”
Their food was laid out on their table in no time. “Bon appétit,” Carolynn said graciously and left.
“Shall we? I’m starving,” Dare said.
“Me, too. Your divorce issues drained all my energy.”
To her utter surprise, he chuckled.
“I know. I owe you.” He gestured to the food.
She was glad they were back to the lighter side of things.
“This is my favorite. It’s roasted Maine Lobster with mashed potatoes. I got you the same.”
In her plate was a giant lobster sitting on a pile of mushroom, corn risotto and several kinds of vegetables, buttered and garnished so beautifully. It was a gastronomic dream. Her mouth watered. “Looks yummy.”
“Dig in.”
Her first bite was heaven. “Uhmmm,” she moaned. “This is delicious!”
“Told ya.”
“Hmmmm mmmm, mmmm.”
Dare was avidly watching her, his eyes crinkling at the corners in amusement. From a remote, arctic look to such affable smile in less than two minutes. She wanted to shake her head. No wonder he was a great actor.
“Do you always make those sounds when you eat?”
She blushed. “Sorry.”
“No, no. I just find it....fascinating. Don’t change. I like women who appreciate the natural pleasures in life.”
“Natural pleasures...do you mean shopping?” she asked in feigned innocence. “No wonder you married Gabby.”
He burst out in a laugh. “You got me there.”
Celine was in heaven. They walked around the garden after dinner. They transferred to the small alfresco bar and drank full-bodied wine under the soft illumination of the old gas lamps. She loved the tranquility of the place, its unassuming beauty and its warm comfort. Several celebrities dropped by their table to exchange a few words with Dare. The deference they gave him was very apparent. Dare was the top dog in Hollywood.
“By the way, who’s the Robert Jen was talking about?”
“My guess is Robert the Ironman.”
“Oh my God, I love him, too!”
He frowned. “Who else are you crazy about?”
“Enrique Iglesias!”
He looked incredulous. “The pop star?”
“Come on, he’s more than that.”
“Sorry, don’t know his music.”
“Oh, he’s not known for his power vocals but he’s a great performer. His voice is simple but when he sings, you can feel his soul. I’ve never seen him live in concert. He’s in my bucket list.”
“You’re too young to have a bucket list.”
“On the contrary, everyone should have a bucket list at any age to remind us that there’s so much to look forward to in life. We can have a bucket list every decade. If people do that, they won’t ever hit a mid-life crisis.”
“So...how long have you been a fan of Enrique?”
His ears were red! Was he...? “You’re not jealous of him, are you?” she teased him.
“Huh? Me?” He expelled a wheezing laugh. “Crazy idea, kid. Me jealous of Enrique who?” He shook his head and laughed again.
She was such in a good mood to take his sarcasm to heart. “Well, idols do get jealous when their fans look at another, don’t they?”
“Sorry, Enrique and I are hardly in the same league. I don’t sing panty-creaming songs.”
“Oh you just made panty-creaming movies. I’ve seen ‘em all,” she bit back.
His jaw dropped.
She grinned and patted his arm. “Loved them all, too. Just to reassure you, Dare Montgomery, you’re my all-time favorite. My number one. Forever and ever.” She drew a cross on her chest with her forefinger.
He grunted and she noticed that his cheeks were flushed as well now.
“Are you blushing?”
“I don’t blush.”
“You are!”
“I’m not.”
“If you say so, but you are.”
He sighed, exasperated and picked up the bottle of 1982 Chateau Lafleur Pomerol. He’d learned that Dare had bottles of his favorite drinks stacked at the bar for his consumption whenever he’d come dine or just hang out in this hotel with his friends. The perks of being a megastar.
“More?” he inquired.
She nodded. He poured more wine into her glass.
She stared at the dark liquid filling the crystal flute.
Please God, give us a chance. We will be great together. I feel it in my heart, he really is my soul mate. Yes, he is very flawed. But nobody is perfect. He’s become a very rough diamond over the years, but I accept this. I promise to love him more so that the light within him will shine through once again. I know, he is flawless inside.”
They exited Chateau Marmont via a secret passage at the back to avoid the paparazzi. Dare rode in his limo again with Celine.
The evening progressed well. Celine, despite her young age could surprisingly match him wit for wit. She knew a lot about art, literature and film, something he found truly impressive. He had never been with a woman who can discuss Dali, Wilde and Kurosawa in one breath. Time with Celine would pass like a blur. It was just a few hours but they’d talked about so many things. In fact, he’d talked to her more than he’d talked to all the women he’d fucked in his celebrity life combined.
Talk.
Imagine that?
Gracious Fuck, why don’t you invite a dozen starlets tonight for an orgy? That will surely cure this unusual fascination you have for this young woman. Talking, for crap’s sakes!
“I really had a great time.”
He smiled at her as they sat side by side in the limo. “Is your energy back?”
She laughed. “It is! Thank you!”
“Do you like your job so far?”
“Hmmm, with the exception of your maniacal driving, hard core sexism and frequent obnoxious behavior, everything’s fine and dandy so far.”
He chuckled. “You should come watch me during the Elixir Celebrity Challenge.”
“I would love to!”
“So you will no longer nag me about my driving.”
“Oh, I will still nag you even if you won the championship this year.”
He sighed. “I have the feeling you’d do that.”
“What is it with speed that you like?”
“What do you think?” he returned the question. Knowing her, she’d come up with answers.
She didn’t disappoint. “You want to test your limits, how far you can go before you’d lose control. Or you are taunting death itself because you are bored with your life. Having too much of fame and fortune can take away the umph, you know.”
“There you are psychoanalyzing me again.” Damn, her intuition was quite remarkable.
“I like picking your mind.”
“What’s umph?”
“You know, the umph, when you do martial arts, you shout to add force to your kick or punch. Same thing in other endeavors. There’s always gotta be an umph to drive you, excite and inspire you to go to work. You know what I mean? Passion.”
Passion. He was feeling passion of a different sort, alright. “You think I’ve lost my umph?”
“Some. That’s why you’re looking for it. But you know what they say, the more you look for it, the more it eludes you.”
“You know, this is the first time a woman actually shows interest in other parts of my anatomy.”
“Oh poor you. You’ve been objectified. Must be hard on a man of your stature, to be reduced to a mere sex symbol when you have so much more to offer.”
“Are you sympathetic or insulting me?”
“What would you want it to be?”
“Let’s see. If you were given one chance to choose which part of me to pick on, which would it be?”
Shit, here you go again, treading on someone’s territory. You just can’t help it, can you?
But he was just skirting the territory, not invading it. Nothing more.
“Hmm, that would be a tough choice.”
“Between?”
She turned to face him. And when her hand reached out to touch him, he wanted to recoil and avoid her touch, and yet the bigger part of him yearned for it.
It was one thing when he did the touching.
Another thing when she did.
“Your mind...” she stroked his hair with her left hand, “is quite mysterious and I would like to uncover your deepest secrets... And your hands...” She put her hand on top of his hand resting on his leg, “are quite strong that I wonder what they’re capable of doing... And your...” She put her left palm over his chest. “Your heart...I want to know what it beats for. I want to see if it’s happy and healthy.”
The ball was in her court. This was her move, not his. She was touching him on her own volition.
Seducing him.
He shouldn’t feel guilty for this. It was her choice.
Right?
Wrong.
He swallowed. “One. Choose only one.”
“If I choose one, will you allow me to have it?”
“Only if you name the one that I want you to touch the most right now.”
She smacked his chest lightly. “I won’t choose that. I’ve already touched it.”
“No, you haven’t. Not really––”
“I want your heart.”
Aw, shit. Major move.
Ben just got dumped. Big time.
And he was torn even more.
He wanted her so bad, for wanting him.
He hated her, too, for wanting him more, for cheating on poor Ben.
Her face was partially illuminated only by the street lamps coming from the outside as they cruised by but her eyes, those big, lovely eyes that spoke to him even without words were drawing him deep...deeper into her depths. Depths that transcended the physical. And suddenly, he was afraid of losing the battle with his conscience.
Fuck his conscience. Why did he need to deprive himself over his fucking conscience?
“You can have all of me but that,” he said quietly.
“But it’s the only thing I want from you.”
“I can offer so much more than that.”
“No. I don’t want anything else. Just that.”
He touched her face then, tenderly tracing the soft curve of her cheek. Such loveliness, intelligence and passion waiting to be explored further. He had never felt such regret in his heart.
Are you serious? You think she’s for real?
You’re the much bigger fish. Of course, she wants you better than her old lover. It’s the simplest equation in the world. Get real. He doesn’t see you. Nobody really sees you. Don’t be an idiot twice.
Fuck you.
But it was the truth.
He must stop seducing her. It was him who was making her want more, tempting her, dangling his goods in front of her. What young, red-blooded woman would prefer Ben to him, Dare Montgomery, as a lover? It was no contest. Ben was no match to him on all counts. She was no match to him, too. It was unfair to test her like this.
He must end this. Blow her off. Dash her hopes.
“I’m sorry, Celine. But I don’t believe in fairy tales.”
The light in her eyes faded. “That is so sad.”
“I’m the worst at relationships. You should know that by now.”
Silence.
“You should look elsewhere for your happy ending.”
He looked out the window, not wanting to see her reaction.
There, it was done.
But why did he feel like he just lost a limb?
They both remained quiet until they reached Sommerset. The limo parked at the back alley as usual to avoid being noticed.
“You don’t have to come up. I can manage,” she said as he assisted her out of the limo.
“I insist,” he replied and held her elbow.
He accompanied her to her floor all the way to her door. Not another word was spoken between them. It was just as well. He didn’t want to talk anymore with this heavy ache in his chest. Whenever they’d talk he felt like he was confessing to a priest, something he hadn’t done in decades, too. Sharing his most intimate secrets with anybody was something he did not enjoy even if his afterlife depended on it. But this woman was changing all that. So fast.
She opened her door and went it. She turned to him. Her eyes were dull and sad now and he regretted that. How he wished he could bring the sparkle back in her eyes before she’d sleep tonight.
“You must think I’m stupid Sleeping Beauty or Cinderella waiting for her prince to rescue her.”