The Strongest Steel (35 page)

Her hand reached up and gripped the beautiful necklace Trent had designed for her, the beautiful, smooth glass drop with swirls of red and orange to represent the flames on her back … the hottest fire she had withstood. She rubbed it between her fingers like a lucky charm. A talisman to keep her safe.

Through all the thoughts flickering through her mind at rapid speed, one was resonating the loudest. She needed Trent. More than that, she loved Trent and wanted to be with him.

She glanced at the clock. If Cujo was right, Trent would likely be landing very soon, cutting short the trip he had planned for the two of them. What if he wasn’t prepared to give her a second chance? Okay, so maybe it was a third or even fourth chance. What if there was an end to his seemingly unlimited patience with her?

Her phone pinged. Cujo.

He’s on his way to the studio.

This was likely the last chance she was going to get to put this right.

*   *   *

He wasn’t going to go to her. A decision he made at the bottom of a bottle. He’d apologized, by text, by voice mail, and had received nothing back from her. The last couple of days had provided some much needed space, but that space hadn’t yet provided clarity.

Harper knew how he felt about her. He’d put the world on a plate for her before he left, and she’d thrown it back in his face. The irony kept hitting him hard. Yasmin had left because he couldn’t give her anything she wanted. Harper had left because he was trying to give her everything.

More than anything, the time away had solidified one thing. Trent still loved Harper. That part was simple. Everything else was so fucking complicated that it made his head want to do a Linda Blair.

Holed up in the office, he stretched out on the sofa and closed his eyes as he waited for Cujo to start his shift. He’d grabbed a six a.m. flight in LA, and it was now close to three. His travel bag was thrown in the corner, and the contents of his messenger bag were spilled out on the table.

The taxi had been on the way to his condo before he realized that he couldn’t face being there without Harper, so he’d redirected the driver here. It was so hard to face the guys, though. They couldn’t wait to hear details of the show.

Had it been only a week ago he’d been sitting here thinking he had the world in his hands? It was amazing how quickly the world changed.

He looked at the blue plastic folder with all the filming locations and details.

It had been Dred who’d taken him out and gotten him liquored up. As he had stared at the condensation running down the outside of a vodka bottle, Trent had ended up spilling his guts about Harper.

Stroking his hand along his jaw, he considered whether his stance on not going to see her made sense. Maybe she needed him to show her how much he’d be there for her, no matter what happened.

The timid knock at the door irritated him.

“I told you I needed some shut-eye. Please fuck off!”

He pulled his arm up over his eyes. Another bang at the door, this time more forcefully.

“What the fuck? Seriously, do you want to get fired?”

“It’s H … Harper.”

Trent sat up quickly and rubbed his hands across his face.

“Can I come in?” Her voice wavered.

Walking to the door, he flipped the lock and wrenched it open.

Harper was ghastly pale and looked like she’d lost five pounds. Her eyes were ringed with dark circles. He had thought it would make him feel better to know that she was hurting as much as him, but he was wrong.

The instinct to pull her to him and wrap her in his arms was strong. It was tearing him up inside to see her like this. She looked as shredded as he felt.

The light had gone out in her green eyes, but there was a determined look in them as she stood tall in front of him, her right hand gripping her left so hard that her knuckles were white.

“I need to talk to you, if you’ll let me,” she said softly.

*   *   *

Trent locked the door and sat down on the sofa. Harper sat down next to him and turned to look at him. His face was more stubbly than usual, and his eyes were drawn. No sign of her usually happy man.

“I’m sorry.” Harper chewed the inside of her lip as she considered her next words carefully. “I know I’ve said that to you a lot, but I am. Very sorry. I know that seems kind of lame for an English teacher, but I’m incredibly short on words right now.”

She took a deep breath as Trent continued to study her. “I was always scared what would happen if Nathan ever finally found me, but I found out there was something that terrified me more. What he would do to you. I couldn’t risk you. When you told me about the show, all I could imagine was that this could be his tipping point. You know, the thing that pushed him over the edge to move from threats to action.”

“I won’t let him harm either of us, darlin’. There are things we can do to be careful, to stay safe.”

Reaching out, she took Trent’s hand in hers, relieved as his thumb brushed against her knuckles.

“You can’t promise me that, and it’s okay, because I realized something else,” Harper said, taking a deep breath. “You were right. All those things we would have to do to guarantee staying safe
do
add up to less than a full life. I’d decided not to run, but I hadn’t committed to staying. You were right. I was half in. I’m sorry I made such a mess of this.”

Trent’s eyes searched her face. “I shouldn’t have pushed you so hard, Harper. You’ve been through enough.”

“No, don’t you see? You should. I want you to challenge me to be a better person every day. I don’t want you to make allowances for me, or feel sorry for me in some way. And I should do the same for you.”

“I’m sorry too, Harper. I kept pushing at you to trust me and the reality was, I didn’t trust you either. I lied to you about the trip for a reason.”

Harper’s pulse started to quicken. “Why? I mean, about what?”

Trent looked down at their hands. “Because I messed up once before, and I didn’t want it to happen again.” He let go of her hand and ran his fingers through his hair. “I thought I was in love once.”

A burning sensation flared in Harper’s chest at the thought of another woman in Trent’s life. “What happened?” she asked.

“Christ, Harper, we were so fucking young. On paper she was perfect. Loved ink, cars, and me, I hoped. We lived in this crappy apartment, and I thought we were on this crazy adventure together.”

Harper tried to ignore the pangs of jealousy, tried to wrap her arms around her middle until Trent pulled her hand back.

“No, you don’t, darlin’. I need to tell you this. I wasn’t enough for her. Yasmin left me because I couldn’t give her everything she wanted fast enough.” Trent tugged on her arm and pulled her into his side.

“The look on her face when she told me that she wasn’t prepared to wait while I built my career.” Trent stopped, shaking his head gently. “She was disappointed in me. It crushed me. I thought I was over it. But when I got the call about the show, I just couldn’t tell you. I didn’t want to let you down if I didn’t get it.”

Trent shifted on the sofa and looked at her, his chin trembling as he struggled to regain his composure.

“I couldn’t handle it if you ever looked at me the way she did, Harper. I should have talked to you about the show before making all those decisions.”

Harper brushed her lips across his. “You could never disappoint me. I think it’s amazing that you got asked, but even if you hadn’t gotten it, I would still have been proud. In a way, yes, you should have talked to me about it, but it was so early on in our relationship that it really wasn’t any of my business. And even now, I shouldn’t be the one who stands in the way of you achieving something incredible. I want to be the one cheering you on, not stopping you from making it onto the field. I’m just not sure how.”

Trent lifted her hand and kissed her knuckles softly. “I think we’ll figure it out together.”

She looked at the strong hand holding hers. “Oh my goodness, what did you do?” Harper asked, eyebrows raised and mouth open as she studied the cuts and bruises.

“Had a conversation with a streetlight once you got into the cab,” he said, pulling her closer to him.

“I’m sorry, Trent. I really am. If I blew you and me because of all this, I get it and I don’t blame you. I’m done running. I’m done being scared. I’m done doubting whether you and your friends will help me if I need it. I am done with everything except being in love with you. I—”

Harper was flipped onto her back and underneath Trent in the blink of an eye.

“Say it again.” His dark eyes were fierce as he held each side of her face in his big, safe hands.

“I’m sorry, I—”

“No.” He cut her off. “Not that part. The ‘I love you’ part.”

“I love you.” Harper had barely gotten the words out of her mouth before Trent’s lips descended on hers. Their mouths clashed together, banging teeth before soothing bitten lips with soft tongues.

Trent pulled away, taking a deep breath before staring deep into her eyes. Harper could feel his very soul merging with hers.

“I love you, Harper. Everything else is details. A lot of fucking details, granted, but just details.”

He didn’t look away from her as he lowered his head to kiss her again, this time slowly and gently. His lips soothed the burn in her heart, a soft balm to the pain and hurt she had been carrying for so long.

Hands gripped her hair, holding her steady as she poured everything she felt for him into this one kiss—all the love that had been building that she had been too scared to share. The thankfulness that she had someone on her side who would care for her and protect her like she deserved. Wanted. Needed.

Harper arched into him as he slid his hands along her ribs and under the hem of her T-shirt to rub over her breasts. The brush of his thumb over the white lace of her bra caused a delightful friction across her nipple.

Reaching for the bottom of his T-shirt, Harper lifted it up over his head as they broke apart quickly. Trent made short work of removing the rest of their clothes, pulling on a condom, and moving her down the sofa before laying back on top of her.

“This is all that really matters, Harper. You and me and our crazy life that we’ve got covered if we stick together.” Trent lifted one leg and pushed it up with his forearm. “Harper. I need you now,” he groaned before sliding slowly home.

The feeling of Trent filling her so fully was painfully delicious. Harper could feel each delicious inch of this thick erection stretch her as he moved deeper.

Trent leaned his forehead onto hers. “Jesus, sweetheart, I missed you. Don’t do this to me again. Please.” His voice was thick with emotion as he moved to claim her lips.

Harper slid her arms around Trent to pull him close to her as his hands slid underneath her to grasp her ass in both hands and lift her tight against him.

It felt so incredibly intimate. Lying flat against each other, holding each other so tight with Trent so deep inside her, filling her physically and emotionally. Tears welled and she stared deep into the eyes of the man she had fallen in love with.

“I won’t, I promise.” She needed to ask him the question that burned her the most. “Do you forgive me?”

Trent was grinding against her without pulling out, his cock twitching deep inside her.

“Christ. Yes.” He growled, finally pulling out and easing himself back inside her.

An orgasm was bearing down on her, deep within her core, threatening to overtake her, drown her in sensation.

“Come with me, sweetheart. I’m so fucking close.” Trent was speeding up, pounding into her at a furious rate. She could feel the pulsing of his erection deep inside her. Could feel the love pouring from him in waves. Could see the tears in the corners of his eyes.

Trent groaned as he came deep inside her, and there was nothing else she could do but follow.

Chapter Twenty-five

Trent banged on the tailgate of Cujo’s F150, signaling that it was good to go.

Harper turned to take one last look up at her old apartment and smiled. Life had been good to her there, giving her time and space to find her footing in the world again.

“The joint won’t be the same without you, Harper.” Eddie slung his arm over her shoulder, and Harper smiled to herself when she didn’t jump. Since the day she’d arrived, he’d been a good, if somewhat noisy, friend to her.

“I’m sure you’ll find someone new to bug with your metal collection. Maybe it’ll be a she, and she’ll know and appreciate who the Melvins are.”

“Doubt it. She’ll probably hate it and bang on the ceiling, just like you do.”

They both laughed. “On the positive side, I look forward to getting a full night’s sleep from now on.”

Hands snaked around her waist from behind. “Don’t bank on it, darlin’.” Trent placed a swift kiss behind her ear.

“Oh my God. Boys are so gross.” Drea laughed as she handed Harper the keys to her apartment. “Empty and all locked up, lady. You are good to go.”

Harper bumped Eddie one last time with her shoulder and turned to hug Drea.

A motorcycle screamed down the street and Cujo revved the truck engine like he was on the starting line at Daytona in response. “Time to go, boys and girls, if we want to get this unloaded tonight in time for the game.”

Harper watched the bike, the hairs on the back of her neck standing on end. Something about it was very familiar, but she couldn’t quite place it.

Drea rolled her eyes. “What is it with boys and their big engines? Seriously compensating.”

“Drea…” Harper warned gently. “Not today, please.”

“You’re right. This is your day. Sorry.”

Watching Drea walk over to her car, Harper sighed and leaned back on Trent.

“What is it with those two?”

“Hmm … who knows,” he replied as he kissed the side of her neck the way she loved.

Harper closed her eyes and tilted her head to the side, giving him more access. Usually that move was capable of distracting her from everything, but something had rattled her. Something about that damn bike.

*   *   *

“I’m sorry.” Trent stepped up behind her and wrapped his arms tightly around her middle. “This was so not my idea of our first night living together. If you want, I could kill Cujo somehow. Throw him over the balcony maybe.”