The Sword (14 page)

“It was meant to be uncomfortable.” She glanced sideways at the glowering Dominor, catching his scowl. “That is precisely what I mean, gentlemen. You have lived way too long without having to deal with women in your lives. Most of us prefer respect and courtesy over threats and bullyings. Keep that in mind for whenever this stupid exile of yours finally ends.

“There's enough similarity between your world and mine to know that the rest of this world isn't going to take kindly to arrogant bullies of men, should you ever leave this isle. Or have more visitors dropping by.” She looked to her right, across the empty seat on that side, at the only one left. “I know that Rydan is the one who shuns the light, and I've more than met Saber already. So you must be…?”

“Wolfer,” the brother with the biggest body, height, breadth, and muscles, introduced himself on a rumble.

His hair was brown, somewhere between the dark brown of Dominor's and the light brown of Morganen's, with an unruly wave to it that made it even thicker than the others' hair, save for Trevan's thick, sun-streaked strawberry waves. He had amber gold eyes and looked like the wolf his name echoed. He even gave her a wolfish smile, confirming it in his deep voice as he played with the thin, braided bracelet looping his left wrist, gently touching what looked like a plait of hair, of all things.

The last of the brothers to be introduced, he added, “The Wolf. Saber's twin. And I think you just might be a match for him, Lady Kelly.” His gold eyes gleamed briefly with humor. “Certainly it is interesting to listen to you try.”

She narrowed her aqua eyes. “Are you trying to matchmake us? Because I have had my fill of that arrogant, bullying, pigheaded, confusing, yelling—let's just not talk about him, shall we?” she asserted, breaking off that topic to keep her temper cool and her thoughts from getting lost in a whirl of confusion over the irritating, too damned attractive, and way too grumpy missing man. “Morganen informs me it will be five months or so before he can send me back to my universe. Seeing as how I'm the only woman on the island, that means we're going to have to go over a few ground rules for the duration of my stay.”

“Rules?” Dominor asked, arching one dark brown brow. “What have you been spouting until now, if not rules?”

She cleared her mouth with a sip of juice. “First of all, I'm not interested in hopping into bed with any of you—that includes you, Trevan, so you can turn off the charm; I'm not impressed by it. Any attempt from anyone to rape me,” she added bluntly, blandly, “and I will cut off the offending organ, stick it in a jar, and keep it on a shelf somewhere in that lovely chamber over this hall that I presume will be my quarters for the duration of my stay. I might even take it with me when I go back home. That's rule number one.”

Evanor choked on his juice, as she said that. Wolfer choked on a piece of jam-smeared bread. The others all blinked. Coughing, Evanor recovered first. “Lady, I assure you that rape is the farthest thing from our minds. The very shades of our mother and father would rise up from their graves and do the exact same thing to us,
for
you!”

“Well, then I needn't have to repeat myself on the matter,” she stated primly…a little unsure if he meant literally or just figuratively in this magic-soaked realm.

She debated asking for a moment, then shook it off. Glowing lightballs, translation potions, and chalk-drawn invisible walls keeping out hideous mekha-gobblies were enough for her to deal with at the moment. Parental ghosts rising vengefully from the grave would be a bit too much to handle.

“The next rule is no one locks me in my room. Or in a dungeon, or in chains, or in any other way. I don't like that.”

“You'll have to argue with Saber on that one,” Koranen pointed out. “But none of the rest of us will bother. Right?”

“Speak for yourself,” Dominor muttered.

Kelly whapped his arm with the back of her hand, and he glared at her. He did, however, look away when she pointedly arched her brow and glanced at the floor. Instead of repeating himself, he muttered something under his breath about turning her fingers into flimsy feathers.

Ignoring his grumbling, Kelly continued. “The third rule is, I don't take charity. So if any of you have clothing in need of mending, or refitting, or wish for the addition of embroidery or trim, I will sew it for you in exchange for my room and board.

“And if someone is willing to show me how to cook some of these foods, half of which I admit are rather unfamiliar to me, I might be willing to help—
just
help,
not
do it all by myself—with some of the cooking chores, and of course with my share of the cleaning ones. I'd help in the garden, but I've seen too many plants I'm not familiar with, and I wouldn't be able to tell a weed from a prizewinning whatchamacallit, so it's indoor work for me for right now. Now, rule number four is—”

“Kelly! Kelleeeey!!”
Footsteps echoed from overhead, pounding into the hall. “Evanor, she's gone missing!” A body high overhead, on the topmost of the three tall balcony tiers, had flung itself half over the railing to shout down at them. Saber froze at the sight of her. “
You!
”

“Rule
four
,” Kelly emphasized, rolling her eyes, “is that I don't like people
yelling
at me all the time!” she asserted, raising her voice and her head briefly to holler up at the yeller in question. “If you don't have a damned good reason, you will keep your voices quiet!—I'm certain your mother explained to all of you the vast difference, long ago, between an ‘indoor' voice, and an ‘outdoor' voice?” she added, dropping her tone once more into a normal, mock-sweet one, as that dark blond head disappeared from above them, bringing the sound of racing feet again. “So unless you're warning me of a danger to myself, or trying to get my attention across a long distance for an important reason, please refrain from shouting at me.

“I can be quite reasonable when treated in a reasonable way,” she continued, “but not if I am yelled at constantly. It makes my redheaded temper get all mean and nasty. Rule number five is that I reserve the right to make up more rules as we go along, in case any more might be necessary. Now, I've actually managed to hold my temper in check quite admirably, at least so far today, despite being trapped in my room and denied any food until now. Can you all handle all of that, or do I have to get
really
mean and nasty?”

She got a more or less unanimous collection of nods and murmured agreements. Trevan spoke for the rest as he stood and started clearing the table. “I think so, Lady Kelly…so long as you realize none of us speaks for Saber or Rydan. I can say with fair certainty my twin, Rydan, will more or less behave around you for the few moments his hours coincide with yours, providing you leave him alone the rest of the time and do not attempt to enter his domain…but none of us speak for Saber. Right, Wolfer?”

The largest man at the table raised his hands defensively. “This is
his
Destiny, not mine! I admit I am generally of the same mind as Dominor,” he added, glancing at her as his fingertips touched the braid looped around his left wrist, caressing it with a feathery gentleness that seemed almost strange in this largest and most physically powerful of all of the brothers. Kelly wondered briefly what it meant to him, but he spoke again, recapturing her attention. “I am not much inclined to follow another, woman
or
man. We only tolerate our brother leading us, because he is the eldest, and the head of our family. And I tolerate Morganen's occasional fits of temper, as I respect his power. But I am my own man, most of the time. I am the Wolf, after all.”

“Then think of me as the alpha female of this pack, since you're so wolf-oriented,” Kelly pointed out firmly as Koranen stood and started helping his brother. “I am the only female, admittedly, but even if I weren't, I can and
will
be the toughest bitch around.”

Wolfer grunted and picked up his mug, neither agreeing nor disagreeing with her suggestion.

Dominor frowned at her. “How old are you, anyway?”

“Twenty-seven. I'm also used to being in charge of my life,” she added. “It's the only way a Doyle survives.”

“Survives what?” Saber demanded, scowling and striding into the main hall in time to catch her last words.

“The disasters in life,” Kelly returned without thinking. All of them stilled a heartbeat, including her.

“That's it!” Trevan exclaimed, balancing his stack of plates in one hand so he could point with the other. “
She's
the Disaster! Gods know no one of Katan will help us to survive her, so obviously it's up to us to do it on our own!”

Some of the brothers choked on laughter, while others blinked in bemused shock at the possibility.

“Oh, ha ha, very funny,” Kelly retorted, though her mouth twitched up involuntarily on one side. Behind her, Saber stiffened. “If you really want to know how to survive ‘Disaster Kelly,' shape up or ship out! As the ranking female of Nightfall, I intend to order you about until this place is up to my standards of living. A woman's standards, gentlemen, not those of a bunch of lawless, lazy bachelors. This place is to no longer be kept under the grime of your own ‘ideals,'” she added firmly, looking at the men around the table. “You have half an hour to attend to your affairs and report back here for cleaning detail.”

“
You
will be going back to your chamber! You will
not
be ordering my brothers about!”

Kelly piled scrambled eggs between two slices of cheese and two slices of toasted brown bread. “Wolfer, kindly inform your twin that I refuse to listen to anyone who shouts at me. Rule number four, you know.”

Those golden eyes studied her a moment speculatively…then gleamed, just a little bit. He was apparently enjoying the humor of the situation. “Saber, the Lady Kelly wishes me to inform you that she is not listening to you, because you are shouting at her. That's rule number four, you know.”

“
What?
—Get up! You're going back to your room!” He reached down over the back of her chair to grab her under the arm and haul her out of her seat.

“Rule number six!” Kelly asserted, quickly swallowing her mouthful of makeshift egg and cheese sandwich, refusing to cooperate. “No one grabs me without it being absolutely essential, such as to
protect
my life!
Not
to maul me around like a brute. Wolfer, tell this brute to let me go!” she added, clinging hard to the arm of her chair with her free hand, doing her best to keep her makeshift sandwich together with the hand of the arm he had ahold of.

“Saber, the Lady Kelly requests that I convey her wish that you let her—”

“I heard her!” Saber dropped her arm, thumping her back down the few inches he had managed to lift her. For such a lightweight woman, she was rather strong. Or rather, very determined. Slapping a hand on the tabletop, the other gripping the back of her seat, he loomed down over her. “You are going up to the master chamber, and I am going to lock you in there!”

“Wolfer, inform your brother that he is attempting to violate rule number two. Oh, and gentlemen, rule number seven: Anyone who breaks the rules four times in one day eats dirt.”

“Brother,” the largest of the eight men around her recited as solemnly as he could, with those wolf-gold eyes gleaming openly in amusement, “you are attempting to violate rule number two.”

“What in Jinga's Name are you two talking about?” Saber demanded, glaring first down at her, then looking up at his twin. The others were clearing the table quickly and silently, staying out of the verbal field of fire between the three of them, yet clearly too drawn by this three-way argument to leave without seeing it to its conclusion.

Wolfer said nothing to his twin for a moment, then almost as an afterthought turned to Kelly, who had deliberately not acknowledged Saber's demand. “Lady Kelly, one of my brothers wishes to know what we are talking about. What would you like me to tell him?”

“Inform Mister Grumpy that my number one rule is no rape; my number two rule is no locking me up anywhere; number three is I intend to work at sewing and other various skills to pay for my room and meals during my stay; number four is that no one is to yell at me; number five is that I reserve the right to make up more rules as situations warrant; number six is that no one grabs me gratuitously; and number seven, so far, is that anyone who breaks the rules four times in any combination in one day gets his face pinned to the floor, so that he is forced to ‘eat dirt,' as I like to call it.”

“Brother, the Lady Kelly wishes to inform you that her first seven rules are—”

“I heard her!” Saber grunted darkly, scowling at her.

“Do inform your eldest brother that he has already violated three of the rules, but as rule seven has just come into effect, he has been granted leniency this one time. Also, inform him that, as he is being graciously given a second chance to start over”—her chair skidded across the floor as Saber hauled it around so that she was facing him—“he should take this opportunity to start off on the right foot,” she continued blithely, staring past his shoulder, “and act from this moment on as a perfect gentleman.”