When Kael touched her thigh, Anna’s eyes flew open and she gasped in surprise.
“Shh.” Kael put a hand over her mouth to prevent her scream. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“I thought you were asleep.” Red-faced, Anna pulled her hand from her panties. Does he know what I was doing? Does he think I’m a terrible person for it?
“I was. I think I got more sleep tonight than I have in days, actually.”
“Good.” Anna wiped the tears from her face. “I’m sorry if I woke you up.”
“You didn’t.” Kael traced her thumb along Anna’s cheekbone. “You’re crying.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.” She pulled Anna into a strong embrace. “Bad dream?”
The sudden move took Anna by surprise, but she melted into Kael’s arms. “Good dream.”
Kael kissed the top of her head. “I understand.”
Anna didn’t respond, still unsure if Kael knew what she had been doing when she had awoken. I don’t know that he would understand that. Anna felt ashamed, but not so much that she didn’t crave the comfort of human touch. She burrowed into Kael’s arms, soaking up the warmth of her lover’s body.
“I’m sorry,” Kael whispered after some time. “I’m so sorry I lost her.”
“It’s not your fault. I saw what you were up against. And with Elin being hurt—” She sighed deeply. “I’m sorry. I’m the one who stayed behind. If I’d been with you—”
“They’d have taken you, too.” Kael tightened her arms, holding her in a possessive bear hug. “No, I’m glad you stayed behind. I just…we shouldn’t have left Owensboro so soon. We weren’t ready.”
“We’re both to blame for that. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry for every time I disregarded your fears—”
“And I’m sorry for every time I hurt your feelings. I know I keep doing it.”
Anna exhaled tiredly. “We’re a couple of sorry-ass fools, aren’t we?”
Kael actually laughed. “I guess we are. At least I know I am.”
Anna grinned, ear pressed against the rumbling of Kael’s broad chest. “But I love you anyway,” she chanced to say.
At first Kael was silent, then she squeezed Anna so hard that she had to gasp for air. “I love you, too.”
“And I don’t think we should blame ourselves anymore. This isn’t our fault. It’s their fault.”
“I know.” Kael eased her hold on Anna and touched her hip. “I just don’t know what to do with everything I’m feeling right now. I don’t know what I’ll do if she’s not okay.”
It was the first time they had spoken of that possibility. “I’ll do whatever it takes to make sure that you never have to find out,” Anna said. “One way or another, I’m here for you.”
Kael pulled back, hovering over her with dark, sad eyes. “I know I haven’t said it lately, but I really am glad you’re here with me.”
“Me, too.”
For a moment they just stared at one another. Then Kael blinked and leaned forward to press her lips unexpectedly against Anna’s, pushing her tongue inside of Anna’s mouth. Anna accepted the invasion with a grateful moan, resting careful hands on Kael’s shoulders. Her breathing grew ragged as she tried to keep up with the fierce kiss.
When Kael’s hand slid between her legs, cupping her through her panties, Anna pulled back with a gasp.
“Did you finish earlier?” Kael whispered hotly into Anna’s ear.
Anna closed her eyes, face burning. She considered denying it. “What—”
“You were touching yourself when I woke up.” When Anna opened her mouth to protest, Kael continued,
“It’s okay, sweetheart. But if you didn’t finish, I want to help you.”
Anna released a shaky sigh. God, I’d love to be touched right now. But she shook her head. “You don’t have to do that.”
“I know I don’t have to do it.” Kael traced one blunt fingernail along the elastic waistband of Anna’s panties, then slipped her hand inside. “I want to.”
Kael’s soft words and strong fingers snapped Anna’s control. “Okay.” She felt guilty about accepting pleasure while Elin was still lost, but her mind and body craved the comfort of intimacy and the few moments peace after release. She let her thighs fall open. “I’m sorry, I just need—”
Kael’s fingers found the sensitive flesh between Anna’s legs. “I understand. I think I need it, too.”
Now Anna was wet. Kael gathered her arousal from the source, then rubbed at Anna’s swollen clit. Anna hooked an arm around Kael’s neck and stared up into her eyes, breathing hard as she worked her hand in silence.
“Come on my hand, baby,” Kael whispered.
Anna lifted her hips, thighs trembling, and closed her eyes.
She imagined Elin lying beside them and quickly reached a gasping, shattering orgasm. Kael lay on her when the aftershocks subsided, face pressed into her neck.
Anna felt renewed tears slide down her cheeks. She brought her hand up to cradle the back of Kael’s head, careful of the healing gash on her dark scalp.
“I want to be inside of you,” Kael whispered against Anna’s throat.
Anna stiffened, feeling Kael’s hand trapped between her legs, held hostage by thighs pressed tightly closed. Before she could respond to the husky request, Kael lifted her head and stared to her left. They had slept beneath a small cluster of large trees, and in the distance was the highway. Anna looked, but she didn’t understand what had drawn Kael’s attention.
Kael lowered her head until her lips were pressed against Anna’s ear. “Don’t move, do you hear me?
There’s someone watching us.”
Anna shuddered. Knowing that someone had just witnessed her conflicted pleasure, she felt almost claustrophobic beneath Kael’s bulk. A flashback threatened to overtake her, and she struggled to remain calm.
“What are you going to do?” Her chest rose and fell with her panicked breathing. She hoped that Kael would answer; she needed to hear her lover’s voice, to be reassured.
So fast that it left her gasping, Kael sprang to her feet and sprinted toward the road. Anna could make out a dark shape tumbling from the bushes a moment later, landing on the ground with a loud grunt. In shock, she watched Kael struggle with the stranger, then after pinning him down, Kael cursed out loud.
“Goddamn it, kid, you almost just got killed!”
At that, Anna found her blue jeans and tugged them on, then jogged to where Kael lay panting on the ground with the intruder. Anna saw blond hair reflected by dim moonlight.
“Matt?” She folded her arms over her breasts, all too aware that she wasn’t wearing a bra beneath her thin T-shirt.
The boy looked at her with wide, scared eyes. “Uh…hey, uh…Anna. How are you?”
“What the fuck are you doing here?” Kael stood and yanked Matt to his feet. “Why the fuck are you spying on us?”
“I wasn’t spying, I swear! I just didn’t expect to catch up with you guys in the middle of the night, and I didn’t know how to approach—”
“Matt, it’s okay,” Anna said. Despite her embarrassment at what he may have observed, she wasn’t altogether unhappy to see him. “Why did you want to catch up with us?”
“I, uh…I’m, uh—”
“You like hiding in the bushes and watching people sleep?” Kael took a step toward the boy, who looked as if he were one wrong word away from pissing himself.
Matt swallowed hard, then glanced from Anna to Kael and back again. “I came to help.”
“We don’t need him,” Kael muttered to Anna while Matt tested several new bicycles they had taken from the Sports Authority store that loomed, massive and quiet, behind them. “How can a kid like him help us?
How do we even know he really wants to help?”
Mildly exasperated, Anna asked, “Why would he be here unless it’s to help?” She reached around to the sling on her back, and Zep squirmed playfully at her touch.
“That’s a great question.” Kael watched Matt race on a bike around the perimeter of the lot. “Why would he leave his companion just like that? I don’t buy it.”
“You’re the one who thought Robby was such an insufferable asshole. Why do you find it so hard to believe that Matt would leave him?”
Kael shrugged, silent as Matt pedaled over to them and swapped to another bike, saying, “It was okay, but I want to try the blue one again and then we can leave.”
“Make it fast,” Kael growled.
Matt hesitated, obviously unsettled by Kael’s tone. “It’s okay, I can just—”
“Go ahead and take it for a spin.” Anna gave him a gentle smile. “Another couple minutes of rest won’t kill us.” As the kid pedaled away, she took Kael’s hand and asked, “What is it about him that upsets you so much?”
“I don’t know. I just…don’t want him around.”
“But he’s offering to help us. How can we refuse? I think we need to accept any help we can get.”
Kael dropped her gaze to their joined hands with a half-smile. “He doesn’t look like a fighter to me. I doubt he can use that knife he carries.”
Anna smiled at the truth of that statement. Matt probably wasn’t the fiercest of warriors, but she hoped that he would be capable of holding his own. “No, he doesn’t seem like the violent type.”
“I’m serious, Anna.” Kael’s jaw was tense, all traces of good humor gone from her lean face. “How can he help us?”
“I don’t know yet. Aren’t you the one who told me not to think ahead of myself? That’s not a question to be answered now. I say we keep him with us until we find out.”
Kael released Anna and mashed the heels of her hands into her closed eyes, exhaling harshly. “What if he gets hurt? He’s just a kid.” Her voice cracked on that last word. “He’s only a little older than my firstborn.”
Anna didn’t like thinking about the danger Matt would surely be in, but the threat of it wasn’t enough to sway her to turn him away. “I don’t know, but I think we’d be stupid not to take any advantage we can.”
“Fine. He stays. But you take care of him, too.” Kael flashed Anna a reluctant smile. “Him and the puppy.”
Anna smirked. “Got it.”
As though sensing that the time was right, Matt coasted back over to them on the blue bicycle. “I’m taking this one. We can leave now.”
“Great.” Kael hopped onto her bike and walked it forward a few steps before tilting dangerously to one side.
She planted her foot to stop the fall, shooting Anna a self-conscious look. “We’ve got a long ride ahead of us.”
“Does Kael hate me?” Matt pedaled his bicycle next to Anna, the two of them straddling the center line of the road leading to Interstate 65. They were about thirty-five miles south of Louisville, now heading north at a healthy pace. The topic of their conversation pedaled briskly in front, far enough ahead that she couldn’t hear Matt’s question.
“He doesn’t hate you.” She bit her lip as she struggled to explain Kael to a relative stranger. Now I know how Elin felt. “He just has a hard time trusting people.”
“What does he think I’m going to do?” Matt sounded truly perplexed. “I told him I want to help. Doesn’t he believe me?”
“He’s upset about Elin. It’s been a hard week or two. Give him some time. He’s a good guy—he’ll warm up to you.”
Matt nodded. “I’m going to prove myself to him. I swear I will.”
Anna smiled at his strong-willed determination. “I believe you.”
“Is Kael very close with your sister?”
“We’re a family.” Anna felt no need to elaborate; that was enough to make him understand. Curious, she asked, “Why did you really leave Robby?”
Matt cruised for a moment, then pedaled to maintain his speed. He shrugged. “Like Kael said, he’s an asshole. I left him while he was sleeping.”
“But why now? Why all of a sudden?”
Matt looked away from her. “He was just ragging on me pretty bad, that’s all. I got sick of it, and I thought—
” He glanced at Anna, then settled his gaze on Kael’s form ahead of them. “I thought you were really nice, and I thought that trying to help you and Kael was better than staying with him.”
“Why was he ragging on you?” She watched Matt’s cheeks redden and wondered if she was asking something too personal. “You guys were friends, right?”
“I guess. He was my father’s friend. I grew up around him, like an older brother.”
“But you weren’t close?”
“Nah. Robby wasn’t really close to anyone except my father.”
“Your dad’s not around anymore?”
“He passed away about three months ago.” Matt’s voice was so quiet that Anna had to strain to hear him. “I don’t know what was wrong. His stomach hurt, and it just kept getting worse until one day he didn’t wake up.”
“I’m sorry.” That was a shame. He was a post-sickness baby, after all.
“Your parents died in the sickness, right?”
“Yes. And my older sister Marina. I’m twenty-five.”
“My mom died during childbirth,” Matt said. “Not me. My little brother. He died, too. That was about six years ago.”
“Again, I’m sorry.”
Ahead of them, Kael called back over her shoulder, “We’re coming up on the highway.”
“Understood,” Anna shouted. She looked back at Matt to find him watching her intensely. She smiled at him, causing a fierce blush to arise on his tanned face. “So Robby doesn’t know where you went?”
“He might guess.” Matt looked back to the road. “I talked about you and your sister after we met you. He knows I felt bad about what happened to her.”
Anna had a sudden flash of understanding. “Is that what he was ragging on you about?”
Matt shrugged, then gave her a shy nod. “He’s always giving me a hard time about something. It’s going to be great not to have to listen to him anymore.”
“You don’t think he’ll come after you?” She wasn’t sure if Robby could catch up to them, or if he was capable of tracking their movements, but the thought made her uneasy.
Matt laughed. “No. Robby loved my father, but he and I have never had a lot in common. It wasn’t so bad when dad was around, but ever since he died, I think Robby’s been taking it out on me.”
“Well, we’re glad to have you. And I thank you for your help, Matt, from the bottom of my heart. You have no idea how much it means to me.”