The Truth of Yesterday (21 page)

     “I shouldn't have said anything,” he said sheepishly.

     “Well, you did, so explain what you meant.”

     “Have you ever heard of empathy?”

     “It's kind of like sympathy, right?”

     
“Close, but not exactly.
They both have to do with feelings. With sympathy, you might feel sorry for someone because of something that has happened to them, or even relate to them because you've experienced something similar. Empathy goes beyond that to actually feeling the emotions felt by the other person, experiencing them for yourself as if they were your own.”

     “I have that?”

      
“To some degree.
It's part of what makes you such a good investigator.”

     “How would that help?”

     “It usually makes it very easy for you to read other people, to understand their true intentions and judge what kind of people they are.”

     “The way I can sometimes just know someone is lying to me without really knowing why?”

     
“Yeah.
Most of the time, it's probably not even something you do consciously, it's just instinct. It's a part of who you are.”

     “That seems like it could be a useful Gift.”

     “They're all useful, Kill. They're tools, just like anything else. It can also be a handicap though. Empathy can sometimes cloud your judgment; you get so caught up in someone's pain or loss that they can manipulate you, maybe without even trying to.”

     “Like with Caleb.” I'd known instinctively that there was something wrong about him but I'd let his story of abuse and his pain overshadow that…and almost ended up dead in the process.

     
“Right.
Understanding your Gift, both its strengths and its weaknesses, could help you to avoid similar situations in the future.”

     “Do I have other Gifts?”

     “I don't know.” I gave him a skeptical look. “Really, I don't. I only knew about the empathy because it's a pretty obvious one and it's already manifested itself clearly.”

     “Oh,” I said in disappointment.

     He grinned.

     “What?” I demanded.

     “At least I've got you interested now.”

     “Did you do that on purpose? You manipulated me, didn't you?”

     “I honestly didn't.”

     I had the suspicious feeling that even if Seth hadn't been the one manipulating our conversation, someone somewhere was pulling some strings, and I didn't like the feeling one bit.

     Seth stood up. “Well, I've done what I came here to do. I guess I'd better be going.”

     “Wait,” I called, sitting up suddenly.

     “What?”

     “I still have questions.”

     “That's what Judy is for.”

     “Well don't just vanish. Do you have any idea how creepy that is?”

     “No,” he said with a broad wink, and then he just simply wasn't there anymore.

     
“Jerk!”
I yelled at the thin air.

     My bedroom door swung open to reveal a rather startled looking Kane. “What did I do now?” he asked in an injured tone.

     “I wasn't…” I started to say that I hadn't been yelling at him, but then realized that would just beg the question who had I been yelling at then. It would be difficult to explain that I had been yelling at his dead brother. I tried to think of an excuse but nothing came quickly enough.

     “You know,” said Kane, looking very hurt, “you're the one who's been a jerk lately. You're always in a bad mood and I'm really getting sick of it. You're not the only one with problems you know.”

     “Kane, I'm sorry,” I said sincerely. “I know I've been selfish and moody and I really am sorry.”

     He looked somewhat mollified. “You want to talk about it?” I offered tentatively.

     “Do you really care?”

     “Of course I care. You're my little brother.”

     With a sigh of relief, he shut the door and came to sit next to me on the bed. “It just seems like everything's been going wrong lately.”

     “Like what?”

     “Jen broke up with me, Jake's been acting weird, and it feels like our family is being torn apart.”

     “Whoa.” I didn't even know where to start. I decided to get what I thought to be the easy one out of the way first. “What happened with you and Jen?”

     “I
dunno
. I thought everything was fine and then suddenly she just dumped me.”

     “Were you serious about her?”

     “No, not really,” he admitted grudgingly.

     “So, it's just a matter of you not being used to being the dumped instead of the dumper, huh?”

     “I guess.”

     “Is this something that's going to hurt your rep as the school stud?”

     He blushed but looked perversely pleased. “Not really,” he said with a little smirk.

     “Then what's the big deal?”

     “It's not really. It just hurt my feelings. I mean, it's not like I even liked her that much. I was probably going to break up with her soon.”

     “So that's what this is really about. It's not even about being dumped really, you're just mad because she dumped you first.”

     He grinned. “Ok, yeah. You make me sound so shallow.”

     I laughed but then quickly turned serious. “So what's this about Jake?” I took a professional interest in this, but tried to keep my voice from betraying more than brotherly concern.

     “Well, you know how when he first came back we hung out a little? We weren't best friends or anything, but we did stuff together and we at least talked. Now I hardly ever see him anymore and when I do, he doesn't say a word to me. So I started asking around and all his friends say he's been acting the same way with them. He's either completely ditched them or he avoids them.”

     I frowned. Things kept looking worse and worse. What had Jake gotten
himself
into? “Do his friends know what's going on?” I asked hopefully.

     Kane shook his head. “Nobody knows anything. A couple of them said it was gradual and some said it happened all at once, but whatever is going on he's done a great job of keeping it secret.”

     I sighed and decided to bring Kane in on Judy's request. “Judy's worried too,” I told him.

     Kane's eyes widened. “She doesn't know what's going on either?” he asked. He tended to see Judy as some sort of all-knowing Oracle. His expression clearly said if she didn't know then all hope is lost.

     “Kane, how would she know? Jake isn't talking to her either. He hardly even comes home anymore. In fact, she's so worried she hired me to look into it.”

     “You're investigating Jake?” he asked in slack-jawed surprise.

     “Yeah,” I said, suddenly feeling guilty all over again.

     Kane blinked a few times then his expression changed from shocked to thoughtful. “I guess if he isn't telling anyone what's going on he didn't leave a lot of choice to those of us who care about him.”

     I was a little surprised by his reaction and didn't know quite what to say.

     “I mean, it sounds to me like he's gotten involved with something he doesn't want anyone to know about, right?”

     I nodded.
“Any ideas?”

     He thought for a moment and then shrugged.
“Sex?
Drugs?
Rock and roll?
Who knows? He's not dropped any clues as far as I can see.”

     “I might have found a few clues today, but I still don't know what they mean,” I said and I told him what I had found in the hidden compartment of Jake's box.

     “Maybe he's selling drugs,” he suggested when I had finished.

     “Then what's the deal with the AIDS Ball and who's the guy in the picture?”

     “Maybe he's hoping to do business at the ball.”

     I gave him a doubtful look.
“With who?
The governor?”

     “I don't know how this stuff works. Do I look like a drug dealer?”

     “What exactly does a drug dealer look like?”

     “Good point.”

     “And that still doesn't answer the question, who is the guy?”

     “Maybe he's Jake's supplier.”

     “He didn't look like a supplier. He looked like a politician or somebody important.”

     Kane eyes flew open wide. “You don't think he's been hired to kill that guy, do you?”

     I couldn't help but burst out laughing. “You think Jake is an assassin?”

     Kane smiled sheepishly. “It sounds pretty stupid when you say it.”

     “Trust me, it sounded just as stupid when you said it.”

     “Well, if he's not selling drugs and he's not a killer-for-hire, where else could he be getting his money?”

     “That's not all he could be selling,” I said slowly.

     “You mean...?” Kane said with understanding. “You think he's selling his body?”

     Micah's story about the ready cash available to escorts came unbidden to my mind. “It's possible,” I said. “But we shouldn't jump to any conclusions until we know more. I've barely begun to look into this.”

     “Too bad you can't get into the AIDS Ball. It would be interesting to know why he is going.”

     My eyes lit up at his words. “Who says I can't get in?”

     “Kill, there's no way you can afford those tickets,” Kane said reasonably.

     “No, but Novak has contacts coming out the
wazoo
.”

     
“Sounds painful.
Do you really think he can get you in?”

     “I don't know, but I'll find out tomorrow. In the meantime, would you do me a favor? Can you keep your eyes and ears open at school? Listen for any gossip or rumors going around about Jake. Sometimes there can be just enough truth in those to set me in the right direction.”

     
“No, problem.”

     “And Kane, I don't have to tell you to keep quiet about this, right? I mean you can't tell anyone.”

     
“No duh, Killian.
I'm not a dumb little kid anymore. I'm not that much younger than you, you know.”

     “Sorry, I didn't mean to imply that I don't believe in you or that I didn't think you were smart. I know you are; you know I'm really proud of you.”

     “Actually I didn't know that.”

     
“Really?”

     
“Yeah, really.
We're not as close as we used to be. None of us are.”

     “Is that what you meant when you said you felt like the family is falling apart?”