The UN Series Complete Box Set (160 page)

I hang my head as I shake it. “That’s the problem, Tate. You only see what your eyes show you,” I say softly as a tear runs down my cheek. “You need to see what your heart tells you.”

He leans down placing his face inches from mine. “Well, therein lies the problem,” he quips. “I’ve never had one.” With that statement he stands, straightens his shoulders, and then turns around and walks out of the living room. I flinch when I hear his bedroom door slam shut.

I look around the house as I wipe my face from the tears that drench it. I can’t get them to stop. I turn around and walk right back out the way I came, not even bothering to pick up the broken glass that resembles my broken heart; knowing that it will be my last time.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

TATE

I slam my bedroom door and go straight to my nightstand. I yank the top drawer open and take the pill bottle out that holds my sleeping pills that I have been prescribed since I was a kid but no longer use. Well fuck that rule I have!

I hold the pill bottle in my shaky hands as I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

You don’t love her!

You can’t love her!

It was an illusion. A lie. Just because she made me want something better didn’t mean things were actually better.

I open my eyes and throw the pill bottle across the room. Denying myself that opportunity to get lost. It’ll just make my nightmares even more fucked-up.

“Motherfucker,” I yell.

My heart pounds in my chest and sweat beads on my forehead. My hands and legs shake from what I just did to Missy. But it had to be done. If not I would just continue to go back to her. She’ll realize that in the long run I helped her. I gave her some of my rage. I made her feel hatred toward me and that will end up being the fuel to keep her away from me.

Keep her safe from the monster. My monster.

I take a deep breath and let it out trying to calm myself down. I need to leave St. Louis. The time has come to move on. It’s not like anyone will miss me anyways. I may go back to Oklahoma and live in Jack’s house that I bought.

If Jonathan wants me, then he’ll follow me there. He won’t give up on me and I need to get him away from here. Away from the things that make me weak—Missy.

Making up my mind, I grab the keys to my bike off of the nightstand and I head toward the garage. I can’t stay here tonight. I never did ask Missy where my mother was and I don’t care. I just don’t want her showing up here.

******

I crawl out of bed the next morning with a pounding headache and in a pissy mood. I throw my jeans and t-shirt back on from the night before and make my way down the long hallway.

I come up to the kitchen and lean up against the wall as I watch my sister spin around the kitchen as she holds my niece. She softly sings her a lullaby and I smile. Marie used to sing the same one to us when I stayed over at their house.

I wish she was here to see her daughter all grown up. To see how happy she is with a husband and her daughter.

She spins around and looks up at me. “Well, well, well.” She smiles. “Uncle Tate decided to join the world,” she says leaning down to speak to Sadey.

I give her a small smile before I hold out my hands to her. She hands Sadey over to me and I sit down with her at the kitchen island while she moves around the kitchen.

“Would you like some breakfast?” she asks as she pours a cup of coffee.

“No thanks,” I say, and my voice is still rough from sleep.

She reaches up to the tall cabinets and gets some plates down before she goes over to the oven and pulls out some biscuits. My stomach instantly growls.

“So are you going to tell me why you left Parker here last night and then came back?” she asks placing two biscuits on the plate and then pours country gravy all over them.

I shrug, ignoring her question as I reach down and grab a hold of Sadey’s little hand. “Your momma’s gonna drive you nuts when you get older,” I say to her and Sam laughs.

“Here,” she says placing the plate in front of me. “You need to eat something.” She comes around the island and takes her daughter from my hands so I can eat.

“Good morning, everyone,” Slade says cheerfully as he walks into the kitchen. He goes over to his wife and places a kiss on her lips before he leans down and kisses Sadey as well.

You would think that the sight of it would have me angry but it does the opposite. I’m happy for them. I’ve just come to realize that not everyone deserves happiness.

“You look a little rough,” Slade says looking over to me. “Did you get drunk last night?”

“No.” I had only had the one glass of Crown that I finished off when Missy came over.

“Well, Parker stayed and had a ton,” she says with a laugh. “He ended up passing out downstairs.”

I chuckle as I place a bite into my mouth.

“Did I hear someone say my name?”

We all turn to look in the entryway of the kitchen and laugh as Parker comes strolling in with only one eye open and wearing nothing but a pair of Superman boxers.

As much as I have been on my own, I’m really gonna miss all of them, especially Missy. My heart squeezes in my chest remembering all the horrible things I said to her last night. I take a deep breath and ignore it.

“What’s the plan for the day?” Slade asks.

“Pussy,” Parker says through a yawn. “I need some pussy to cure this hangover.”

“Parker,” Sam growls at him for his language.

“What? It helps me,” he whines.

Slade chuckles, and I look down to my plate. “I’m gonna pack,” I announce to my food. “I’m moving back to Oklahoma.” The funny thing is—is that it doesn’t hurt all that bad to know that I won’t be here. I feel more relieved than anything. I’m better on my own.

I look up to the silent room and everyone stares at me wide-eyed. Sam already has tears forming in her eyes.

“Tate…?” Her voice cracks.

“It’s time,” I say and she walks out of the room holding onto her daughter tightly to her chest as she starts to cry.

******

MISSY

I never realized how much being alone sucks! I’ve sat around in my apartment all day doing nothing but feeling sorry for myself.

I wouldn’t say I have cried my eyes out but they are pretty puffy and red. The part that really sucks is that I had taken today off to spend the day with Tate. Now I’m spending it with his mother. It’s like I enjoy torturing myself.

She called me first thing this morning and was crying. He wouldn’t answer his phone. She said it kept going straight to voicemail—guess he turned it off. Or he broke it again, either way—no answer. So I gave her directions to my place and she hopped in a taxi and came right over.

I never realized how small my apartment really was until she walked in. Everywhere I look, she is right there staring at me. Watching me intently. We haven’t said much to one another. But I can tell she wants to.

I walk out of my closet after dressing in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt when I come face to face with her as she stands in my bedroom. “Need something?” I ask.

She sits down on the end of my bed and sighs heavily. I want to run out the front door. I don’t wanna have this conversation with her. I don’t want my heart to hurt for Tate more than it already does. He dumped me but he’s the one who hurts the most. The one who’s been hurting for so long now.

“I’m sorry for what happened between you guys,” she says softly. When she called me crying, I informed her that he broke things off with me last night.

I walk to the end of the bed and sit down beside her. “It’s not your fault. I lied to him.”

“Because of me.”

I shake my head. “It was my decision,” I say truthfully.

She reaches over and grabs my hand. “I’m gonna try to help you get him back.”

I give her a small smile even though I know that it’s not going to happen.

I pat her hand and smile. “Wanna go up to the bakery?” I offer. She had mentioned earlier today that she wanted to see it.

“Isn’t it closed?” she asks, and I nod.

“But I have a key.”

******

We finish getting ready and make our way up to the bakery. “This place is really nice,” Laura says looking around as I shut the front door behind us.

“Yeah,” I say. “They have put a lot into this.” They are still working on it to get it where they want.

She smiles as she spins around. “Marie would have loved this,” she says quietly as she walks over to one of the round tables and runs her fingers over it.

I wonder how she became friends with Marie. I don’t know much about Marie except that she was only married to Jack for a few years then they got a divorce. “Can I ask you a question?” I ask quietly.

She turns around to face me. “Sure,” she says but the word comes out unsure.

“It’s about Marie,” I say and she smiles as if relieved. I won’t ask her questions about Tate or Jonathan. Some things I just don’t want to know. “Were you guys close?” I ask.

She pulls out the seat and sits down at the little round table. “We were.” She nods. “I didn’t have any friends when I moved to Oklahoma from Alaska. Jonathan had friends there so everyone that I got close with were his friends. Not really mine.” She looks around the room once again before her eyes return back to mine. “She wasn’t with Jack when we got together. She came later,” she explains. “But he fell in love with her. Who wouldn’t?” She gives a little laugh. “She looked just like Sam. She was beautiful on the inside and out.” She looks down to her hands knotted in her lap. “I wanted to hate her for what she had when she was married to Jack. She cheated on him for what?” She shakes her head. “She broke his heart and it was never the same.” She sighs. “She knew that I wasn’t happy in my marriage. I always hid the bruises and scars well but she knew.” She closes her eyes. “She took Tate in as if he was hers,” she says quietly before opening them. “I wanted to tell her so many times that he belonged to Jack. That Tate was Sam’s half-brother but I couldn’t.” She shakes her head. “I couldn’t let Jack find out.”

“That must have been so hard,” I say with a heavy heart.

“Oh, it was,” she agrees. “There were days that I felt like I had an out. All I had to do was tell one person and I could get away from the monster that Jonathan had become but he would always be there to tear that apart.”

“What did the letter say that he sent you?” I ask. “Did he threaten you?”

She shakes her head. “No. He threatened Tate. I’ve tried so hard over the years to be a different person. To find the ‘me’ that I once was but that fear I have for him is still there and he knows it. Whereas Tate—Tate will stand up to him and he wants that. He wants to teach his
son
a lesson. He likes the fight.”

I swallow the emotions down. Now is not the time to freak out. “Why won’t he let it go?” I ask. “Why wait this long and not just move on?”

Her brown eyes look into mine and she says, “I’m guessing Tate hasn’t told you much?” I shake my head. “He almost killed Jonathan.” She looks down to the table. “Then he was sentenced to prison for attempted murder.”

I gasp as I place my hand over my mouth. “How is he free?” I ask.

She shrugs. “That I don’t know.”

I remember Tate telling me that he almost killed Jonathan and that he couldn’t even succeed at that, but he never mentioned he was in jail. Did he? How sick and twisted could this guy be? What all would he do to Tate? “You think Jonathan wants to kill him?” I ask quietly.

“He wants Tate to suffer. In his eyes, Tate was constantly a reminder of my mistake.” She lets out a sigh. “I should be the one to suffer. I should be the one he takes it out on. Not him. It’s never the kid’s fault,” she says softly.

I watch as she wipes a single tear from her cheek, and I know it’s time to quit asking questions. Her crazy ex-husband is free and her son has completely cut her off. “How about I cook us something up?” I ask standing from the table trying to ignore my mind.

Call Tate! Tell him to be careful. That Jonathan is after him. That I love him. But I won’t, he knows all of that, and it won’t change him.

“That would be nice. Thank you,” she says smiling up at me.

I nod my head and walk into the back. I come to a stop and look around. What could I fix us that doesn’t have to do with a cake? I go over to the cabinets and start to pull things out when I hear the ding of the front door—signaling a customer.

Who would be here this late?

I walk back through the door and come to a stop when I see the back of a tall man standing in front of Laura.

“I’m sorry but we’re closed,” I say nicely.

He slowly turns around and my heart pounds into my chest. “I know,” he says with an evil grin.

I look over to Laura, her brown eyes are wide-eyed and her body is stiff as she stands—terrified.

He reaches out and lightly places his hand on her arm and she jumps. “Don’t hurt her,” I say taking a step toward them. What the hell are you doing, Missy?

He chuckles. “I’m not here for her,” he says taking a step toward me.

I step back. “What are you here for?” I ask and my voice shakes.

“I’m here for my son.”

I shake my head. “He’s not here.” Thank God!

“Well, let’s see what you can do about that.” He take another step toward me and I take another one back.

I spin around to run but hit a man that stops me in my tracks. He shoves me backwards and into the arms of Jonathan.

Before I can even say a word his hand wraps around my throat and he shoves me up against the wall.