Theft and betrayal, Tess thought. Oh, dear. ‘How did Enzo Sciarra cause Luigi’s death, Tonino?’ she asked him.
‘Torture.’ His dark eyes when he looked across at her were blank of emotion. He rubbed at the scar on his face and it seemed to become more raised, red and livid at his touch. ‘The Sciarras demanded protection money,’ he said. ‘A lot of it. For my uncle’s new business venture – a restaurant and bar.’ He continued to stare at her.
Tess could hardly breathe for the tension in the room. ‘Protection money?’
‘When he couldn’t – or wouldn’t – pay up, Enzo made him a visit. That is the way it would work. Maybe he went further than he intended – I do not know. Maybe he wanted just to frighten him. But after the visit …’ His voice almost failed.
‘Luigi died,’ whispered Tess.
Tonino nodded. ‘A heart attack, they said. Many things can cause heart failure, Tess, you know?’
She knew. And she was just getting a glimpse of how
dangerous some of these men could be. Muma hadn’t been joking when she said that Sicily was a dark place. Beautiful, yes. But with a dark, dark shadow.
Tonino got to his feet. ‘The Sciarras have a lot to answer for,’ he said quietly.
‘And have they always hated one another – the Amatos and the Sciarras?’ Tess asked. She didn’t want him to leave, not now, not like this.
‘They were neighbours once.’ He paused. ‘Many generations ago. They shared the land and the harvests; they were friends, they depended on one another. He hesitated. ‘But the Sciarras became connected by marriage to another local landowner – richer, more powerful. They became greedy, they wanted more.’ He shrugged. ‘In Sicily, this happens.’
‘So they argued over the land they originally shared?’ Tess wanted all the facts; the whole picture.
‘
Sì
.’ He eyed her sadly. ‘They fought and the Sciarras won – they took everything – all the Amato land and living. By then the Sciarras were enmeshed in the tentacles and had powerful friends.
La Piovra
, Tess. You understand?’
She understood.
‘What happened to your grandfather?’ Tess got to her feet and went to him. She put a hand on his arm but he didn’t respond.
‘Being accused of disloyalty and theft, being mistrusted by his dearest friend …’ He paused. ‘It destroyed him,’ he said. ‘Alberto Amato was never the same man again.’ He took a step away from her, his eyes cold. ‘And that is what I cannot
forgive your family for,’ he said grandly. ‘The lack of trust, Tess. The dishonour of our family name.’
‘I see.’ It had nothing to do with her and yet she knew that this wasn’t the point for Tonino. She felt as if she should apologise – on behalf of the grandfather she’d never known, the grandfather who had believed what they all told him, who had not trusted his closest friend.
‘So … ’ Tonino made a gesture with his hand. Now you understand, it said. Now you know the whole story.
Tess took a deep breath. She drew closer to him once more. ‘But do you think it’s right,’ she said, ‘for you to hold a grudge against my family for so long? Especially a member of the family – me – who wasn’t even there at the time?’
‘You will not comprehend it,’ he said. ‘But our families were like this.’ He linked his little fingers together. Tess remembered this gesture as the one that Giovanni too had used. ‘That is why it is unforgivable.’ He turned away.
Unless of course, she wanted to say, what they all believed was true. Unless Tonino’s grandfather really had succumbed to temptation … Unless her grandfather and all the others were right all along. But that wasn’t the best plan.
Because he was walking towards the door. Walking out of her life, she realised.
He turned at the doorway. ‘I knew my grandfather,’ he said. ‘He was a good man.’
Tess felt humbled. There was nothing more she could say.
‘Now do you see why love is impossible between us?’ he
asked her. He opened the door. He wasn’t waiting for an answer.
Love, she thought. Love? Only four letters. But a big, big word.
Who’d said anything about love …?
The band arrived to set up at 7.30. They were due to play from 8.15 till 9.30, then after a short break, on till eleven. Brian had put up posters and already there were a dozen people in the bar. While they were doing the sound check, Dark and Bemused glanced over towards Ginny and she smiled. Despite the Ball’s best efforts at being a wet blanket, she had been looking forward to tonight. She couldn’t help it.
‘Looks promising,’ said Brian, rubbing his hands together. ‘Bring it on.’
Magic Fingers, the band were called. Yes, bring it on, thought Ginny.
By 8.15, the number of people in the bar had doubled and by nine the place was humming. Brian’s girlfriend Chantal was also working behind the bar. She had a high-pitched laugh, a retro blonde beehive and talked a lot, but seemed kind and capable. ‘I’ve been working behind a bar for fifteen years, love,’ she told Ginny. ‘What I don’t know now, I never will.’
Ginny was busy – distracted only by an occasional shy glance from Dark and Bemused on bass – so she didn’t have too much of a chance to think about The Thing that was bothering her.
The Ball had been having a field day with it all week, but tonight she’d decided to bury her head in the sand. Shame she couldn’t bury the Ball at the same time …
Magic Fingers segued smoothly from a song called ‘Blue’ – ‘written by Albie,’ the blonde lead singer said; it took Ginny a few seconds to realise that Albie was Dark and Bemused on bass.
Albie
… It was a good song. Soulful. Ginny would like to hear it again – without the accompaniment of a list of orders from some guy at the bar and the rattle of loose change and Brian yelling ‘Speak up, love’, by her left shoulder.
They segued into ‘Yellow’ by Coldplay.
Look at the stars
… Ginny shivered, even though it was getting hot in here. Shit, she thought. It would be such bad luck.
At 9.30 in their break, the boys ordered beers, which, Brian said, were on the house. The success of the evening had made him unusually generous, Ginny thought. And it was true that the band had transformed the Bull and Bear. The place was buzzing. And Ginny – once she’d mastered the drinks and the till and the pumps – was loving it. As she’d told Brian in her interview, she was quick and it turned out she was good at the chat, the banter, the not letting them get too close or too clever.
‘Hey, gorgeous, what d’you reckon to our sound then?’ The blonde lead singer was coming on to her. ‘I’m Matt. Hi.’ He had a sexy grin and she guessed that he came on to most girls and probably had a 99 per cent success rate. She’d be one of the other 1 per cent she decided. He wasn’t her type.
‘You sound pretty good,’ she said, and then flashed a
special smile at Dark and Bemused. ‘I loved your song,’ she said. ‘Blue. Great lyrics.’
‘The quiet ones always get the hottest chicks,’ grumbled Matt. But he didn’t have long to wait. In minutes he was surrounded by a sea of girls queuing up to talk to him, flashing painted eyes and deep cleavages his way.
‘Thanks,’ said Dark and Bemused. ‘What’s your name, by the way?’
‘Ginny.’ They touched hands over the bar.
‘Three pints of lager, love,’ yelled someone.
‘Two mojitos on crushed ice … ’ (Blimey, that was a bit upmarket for the Bull and Bear, thought Ginny, seeing Brian’s glazed expression as he struggled with the rum.)
‘Vodka and cranberry and a pint of bitter …’
Suffering snakes. ‘Sorry,’ she said to D & B. ‘Got to—’
‘Maybe later,’ he mouthed and she nodded.
Ginny turned and found herself face to face with Becca.
‘Hey!’ Becca’s grin was huge. ‘What’re you doing here, Gins?’
Ginny felt ridiculously pleased to see her. ‘My new job,’ she said. ‘Where’s Harry?’
Becca pointed. He was with one of his mates, both drinking pints like they were water, beer splashing down their clothes and on to the floor.
Becca rolled her eyes. ‘Some sort of drinking marathon,’ she said. ‘It’s pathetic.’
‘Take a break for ten minutes, love.’ Brian was breathing down her neck. ‘Go and talk to your mate.’
The band was back on and the people at the bar had thinned. Ginny slipped round to the front and hugged Becca. She wanted to say,
I’ve missed you
, but held back. Becca was the one who had dropped her when she took up with Harry. Becca was the one who couldn’t be bothered to answer texts or hang out anymore.
‘I’ve missed you,’ said Becca. ‘Sorry I’ve been preoccupied.’ She looked towards Harry, as if trying to work out why.
Infatuated, more like, thought Ginny. ‘S’all right,’ she said.
‘How’re things?’
‘OK. I’m staying at Nonna’s at the min. Mum’s in Sicily.’ She pulled a face. You’d hardly know she wasn’t around though; she called or sent texts every night. Ginny reckoned they were communicating more than before she left.
‘And how’s Ben?’ Becca shouted in her ear.
God, but this band was LOUD … ‘We finished,’ Ginny shouted back. ‘It wasn’t going anywhere.’
Becca nodded in agreement. She’d always understood. Though where, Ginny wondered, had she wanted it to go? She hadn’t much enjoyed where it was in the first place. It wasn’t like she’d required any kind of declaration or commitment from Ben. She supposed she’d just wanted some sign that she wasn’t wasting her time. Because at the end of the day, she realised, although he had been her first, she had invested the virginity thing with a significance it didn’t really have. At the end of the day Ben had the right kind of looks, but he wasn’t very interesting.
She told Becca this.
Becca laughed and nodded. ‘Girlfriends are much more fun.’ She nudged Ginny in the ribs and Ginny felt a slight twinge. She must have winced because Becca moved closer.
‘What’s up?’
‘Nothing – bit of a stomach ache.’
‘What’s up – honest answer?’
That’s exactly what they used to say to each other. And suddenly Ginny wanted to confide in someone.
‘I’m a few weeks late,’ she said. ‘That’s all.’ That’s all – like it might not be the end of the world if she were pregnant. She felt the pressure from the Ball release slightly. But she did have a stomach ache – like she had constipation or something. Was that what being pregnant felt like?
‘What?’
Ginny repeated the information, yelling into Becca’s ear this time.
Tell the entire pub, why don’t I
, she thought.
‘Shit,’ said Becca. ‘I need a fag. Let’s go outside.’
‘Five.’ Brian signalled to Ginny. She nodded.
‘Have you done a test?’ Becca, always the practical one, asked as soon as they were outside. It was dark and cool after the high body-heat in the pub and her ears were ringing. Ginny hugged her arms around herself.
‘Nope.’ She hadn’t dared. The thought occurred to her – what would her mother say? Galloping guinea pigs, she’d go ballistic. ‘But I’ve got this feeling,’ she told Becca. ‘I don’t feel right. It feels like I might be.’ She groped in the pocket of her jeans and fished out a cigarette, though she didn’t really feel like smoking it.
‘Crap,’ said Becca. It was this way with words she had that had made her such a great friend. ‘You’ve got to do a test. There’s no point just sitting around being negative … ’
Ha. ‘Hope it is,’ said Ginny and they both giggled. It was mad, but she couldn’t help it.
Becca nudged her. ‘You’ve got to be positive,’ she said.
‘I hope not,’ said Ginny and they giggled again. Ginny had to hold on to the wall she was laughing so much – it must be hysteria.
She glanced at her watch. ‘Gotta go back in,’ she said reluctantly. She stamped the cigarette out under her foot.
It was amazing, she thought, as she pushed her way through the crowd, how even the possibility of being pregnant – which was so bad, so impossible to contemplate – could become funny with Becca. And how having a good laugh could diminish the Ball’s power somehow, as if it thrived on misery.
After the band had done an encore, and Brian had gone down to the cellar to change the barrels one last time, they started packing up and the punters finished their drinks and began drifting away. Ginny cleared and wiped tables and loaded glasses on to the bar.
‘You went down a storm, boys,’ said Brian, handing over their cash. ‘Cheers.’
‘See you in two weeks then, guv,’ said Matt, winking at Ginny.
Two weeks, she thought. That was a long time.
‘What’s wrong with next Saturday?’ said Brian. ‘You saw
’em. They couldn’t get enough. You could be our resident band.’
‘Well, OK, cool.’ They all grinned at each other. Deal done.
Dark and Bemused came up to Ginny to say goodbye. “Maybe we can have a coffee sometime,’ he said.
‘Yeah,’ said Ginny. That was – if she wasn’t carrying another man’s child … Could she get into another relationship before she knew? Coffee was only coffee. But … She didn’t think so. So when he asked for her number she didn’t immediately whip out her mobile.
Becca and Harry were two of the last to leave. ‘I’ll call you tomorrow,’ Becca said and mouthed ‘Do the Test’ in such a scary, eyes-wide way that Ginny took a step backwards and collided with Brian who was stacking glasses.
‘Careful, love,’ he said, but when he handed over her money, he gave her an extra tenner, so she knew he was in a good mood. She pocketed it. That would pay for the pregnancy test …
She looked up in time to see Dark and Bemused about to walk out the door. Shit. It gave her a bad feeling. The Ball said
no
, but what the hell.
She hotfooted it across the room to give him her number. Cos he might not ask again.
Ginny went into Boots three times the next day before she plucked up courage to buy the pregnancy kit. Even then, terrified she’d see someone she knew, she took the precaution of hiding the blue-and-white packet under a red flannel in the basket.
How stupid was she? She thought back to when this – if there was a
this
– had happened.
‘When were you last on?’ Ben had asked one of the last times when they were still together. He’d run out of condoms and had apparently only remembered this fact just as they reached a fairly crucial moment.