The Wild Rose of Kilgannon (17 page)

"Angus, how will you do it? How will you free Alex?"

He shook his head. "I canna tell ye, as we've no' figured it all out yet. But the Macleans are willing. Murdoch's brother Duncan has been to see me, and Ramsay's brothers are coming from the south to assist." He sighed. "Ye being here is a complication I'd no anticipated. I thought ye safely on yer way to England."

I nodded. We were silent for a long time then, each lost in his own thoughts. How I longed to see Alex. It was not enough to be in the same city with him. Why could I not have an hour with him, just one hour? How would that change anything? I sighed.

"Angus, do we not have anyone else we can turn to? I would rather not stay here. Is there nowhere we can go?"

Angus stared at the floor for a long time before answering. "I have nowhere safe to put ye, lass." He shook his head. "If ye'd arrived a few days earlier, I could have sent ye home on the Mary Rose, but I have no men to spare to take ye to England or to Kilgannon and I dinna think Robert does either. Ye canna travel on yer own, that would be foolish." He sighed. "I think this is the safest place for ye in Edinburgh. And at least here ye can still try to free Alex by writing to the judges and the court. Just stay here in this house. No one who kens ye are with child would think anything of that. And it is obvious ye are no' the Campbell's ..." He paused, his face flushing.

"I hope it is obvious," I said tartly. "If it is not, then they all think the worst of me already and any plea on my part for Alex would only appear to be the worst hypocrisy."

"The word abroad in town is only that Robert Campbell is giving ye safe
harbour
since ye were childhood friends. Nothing more. Robert has been most considerate of yer reputation."

I nodded. "But, Angus, if that's the case, then the most logical thing for me to do is to see Alex. If I were here as Robert's ... companion ... I would not

attempt to see the man I was unfaithful to, would I? But if I am a faithful wife, which I am and you know it, then the only sensible thing for me to do is
try
to see my husband. And I've already begun the process. Today, in fact, is the day that I am to return to the castle and contribute money for maintaining troops in Edinburgh."

Angus watched me with narrowed eyes. "Mary," he began, then shook his head. I laughed, knowing I'd won a point.

"Angus, what can it hurt if I see him? Or at least try? It's the only thing that will actually defer suspicion from me. If I do as you suggest and stay hidden in this house and people continue to talk about me, then I will appear more guilty of adultery, or of plotting Alex's release, than I am. It would be unnatural for a wife to not visit her husband. Please, Angus, let me go see him. Just once. And then I'll stay here. And when the Mary Rose comes I'll go anywhere you like and not be in the way. But the only way I'll agree to stay here in this house is if you help me see Alex."

He frowned at me. "We're no' negotiating, lass."

I laughed and rose to stand before him. "No, Angus, we've finished negotiating." I leaned to kiss his cheek. "Thank you," I said softly and he didn't pretend to misunderstand.

"Once,
Mary
," he said. "Only one visit."

I nodded.

It was not so easy to arrange. Angus accompanied me, and when the Campbell soldiers understood that I was leaving the boys behind in Robert's house, they did not insist on joining us. At the
castle
we waited in the same anteroom as before, I with my hands in my lap while Angus paced. Eventually a soldier came to bring us to Colonel Porter, but Angus had insisted that I not see him again, and he went alone to talk with the officer, a bag of money hidden in his plaid. It was another hour before he returned, his color high and his manner abrupt. He nodded at me.

"It's arranged, Mary," he said, gesturing me to follow the soldier who waited behind him. "I'll be here when yer finished, lass." He crossed the room and settled himself on a bench.

I thanked him breathlessly and hurried to follow the soldier, who led me without a word to a dingy room overlooking the same courtyard that I'd seen Alex in on my last visit, holding the door open for me to enter.

I looked across the tiny room. And saw Morag Maclean with her arms around my husband's neck. Morag, I thought, bristling. I fought my anger.

Alex, with his back to the door, did not see me at first, but Morag did, and she smiled slightly, then ran her hands down Alex's chest, letting them linger at his waist. Alex's arms were at his sides and he lifted them now and moved her hands from him as he stepped back from her.

"Morag, dinna ..." he was saying as the door slammed shut behind me. He turned with a surprised expression, dropped Morag's wrists, and moved toward me. "Mary Rose!" he cried, his cheeks flaming above his beard. He swept me into his arms and kissed me soundly. "Mary," he said. "Lass, it's good to see

ye."

"Alex," I said stiffly, not returning his kiss, nor his embrace. I left my arms at my waist where they'd been. He ignored my coldness and kept his arms around me. "I see you have a visitor already. Hello, Morag."

Morag smiled her cat smile. "Mary. We dinna expect ye."

"Obviously."

"If we had kent ye might be coming, we'd have been more discreet," Morag purred.

Alex released me then and faced her, his tone bitter. "Oh, no, lassie," he said to Morag heatedly. "Dinna play that game. No' with me, no' with Mary. Ye ken better than that." He turned to me, his eyes blazing. "It's no' what yer thinking, Mary Rose. Morag only just arrived." He threw her a baleful glance. "To see her husband. Ye do remember yer married, aye, Morag? It's Murdoch ye came to see."

"And ye, Alex," Morag said, apparently unscathed by his anger.

"Then yer fooling yerself," Alex said. "We've naught between us and ye ken it. Dinna be causing trouble in my marriage."

"There's a lot between us, Alex," Morag said, coming to stand before him. "A lifetime between us. Or do ye choose to no' remember all tha' has been between us?"

"That was a long time ago, Morag."

Morag tilted her head and watched Alex with a smile flitting about her lips. "No' so long ago, Alex. Have ye forgotten a visit to Dunvegan after Sorcha's death? A very ..."—she reached out and traced a hand along Alex's jaw—"... memorable ..."

Alex reached for her wrist and drew her forward, his tone menacing. "Morag, for the love of God, will ye stop this charade? This is no' the time to be playing games with my marriage. Or yers." He looked over at me, then back at Morag. "Tell her the truth of it, Morag. Tell Mary there's naught between us."

"I would be lying, Alex," she said quietly.

He loomed over her and shook her wrist. "I'm in no mood to be trifled with. Tell her."

Morag met his eyes. "I have kent ye all yer life, Alex. I was the first..." She stopped as Alex backed her to the wall.

"Morag, if ye think this is amusing, or that somehow it'll bring me to ye, yer sadly mistaken. I married Mary, not ye, though God kens I kent that's what ye wanted; ye made it plain enough. But, Morag, I dinna want it. I dinna want ye. Nor do I now. Ye satisfied my body, but ye had nothing for my mind. No' then and certainly no now. It's Mary I love and she was good enough to marry me. And ye married Murdoch, if ye'll remember, of yer own volition. I dinna remember a gun to yer head." He spun away from her, then back, his fists clenched. "Dinna do this, Morag. Ye'll wreck two marriages for naught and break Murdoch's heart in the bargain. If this is yer revenge on me for no' marrying ye, it's falsely conceived. Ye've naught to gain but my contempt. I wouldna be wi' ye even if I were no' married, Morag. Ye've naught for me. It makes ye look foolish to be playing these games the now. Go see yer husband while ye can and pray I dinna tell him what ye are."

"Murdoch loves me," she said, raising her chin.

Alex nodded. "Aye, the more fool he. Why can ye no' go and comfort him,
Morag
? We're headed for trial and we willna be coming home, lass, no' him to ye, nor me to Mary. Stop the playacting. Go. Dinna shame yer-self further."

"Ye promised me, Alex," she said.

"A long time ago," he said
quietly
. "A verra long time ago. Ye canna hold me to that. If I had wanted to marry ye I would have after Sorcha died. Ye'll notice I dinna."

She turned her head away and began to cry. Alex closed his eyes and shook his head and I wished myself anywhere but here. After a moment Alex opened his eyes.

"Morag," he said, his tone quiet now. "I'm sorry yer sad, but I canna help ye now. Go see your husband and leave me with my wife." Morag wiped her eyes and left us without a word.

When the door closed behind her Alex sighed and looked at me. "Mary... "he began, then stopped. "Mo Dia, lass, what can I say to ye? I dinna encourage her. I dinna want her,
Mary
; I dinna want anyone but ye. And what a time to choose, when I have no long to be with ye at the best of it." He crossed the room, taking me in his arms, and this time I returned his embrace. And when he kissed me I raised my hand to his jaw and erased Morag's touch.

His kiss was desperate and bittersweet, his anger still palpable. But his arms were strong around me and for just a moment I pretended that we were not here, that the ugly scene with Morag had not just happened. "Mary," he breathed, then bent to kiss my neck and I arched back to receive his touch. "Do ye love me, Mary Rose?" he asked hoarsely. "Even now, lass, do ye love me?"

"Yes," I gasped as he kissed me again, this time more insistently, backing me against the wall and searching my mouth with his until I couldn't breathe. "Oh, yes, Alex! Yes and yes and yes!" I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him tighter against me, feeling his body's readiness for mine.

"Then love me now, Mary Rose," he said, leaning back to look into my eyes. "Love me now."

I felt my cheeks color. "Here? Now?"

"Here. Now." He traced a line of kisses from my temple to my shoulder. "Now, lass, for perhaps the last time."

"But, Alex, there are men just outside this door. They could hear us. Or someone could come in...."

"Then let them, lass. We're doing naught wrong. I'm making love to my wife. Let them listen and envy me."

I shook my head, then smiled as Alex leapt away from me to pull the table, which had been in the corner, to block the door.

"Now, lass, they canna interrupt without us kenning beforehand." He stroked my cheek and gave me a hopeful look. "Mary, love me. Come, lass, let's have one more
memory
."

"Alex ..." I began, but he stopped my protests with his mouth as his hands roamed over my clothes, loosening laces and undoing sashes.

" 'Had we world enough, and time,'" he said quietly as he pulled my bodice from my shoulders and bent to unfasten the waist of my skirt."
'This coyness, lady, were no crime.'"

I laughed a throaty laugh and stepped back as he spread my cloak to the floor and, a moment later, laid his now-discarded kilt atop it. He reached for me again, clad now only in his shirt, and slowly undid the lacings of my shift. "Alex," I said, and pulled his mouth to mine. "I love you."

"Aye," he said, "and I ye, Mary Rose." He put a hand on each of my arms and leaned to kiss my forehead." 'An hundred years should go to praise thine eyes, and on thy forehead gaze.'" He slowly pulled the shift free from my body and I stood before him naked and smiling." Two hundred to adore each breast,' " he quoted, and kissed each breast in turn, then ran his hands lower." 'But thirty thousand to the rest.' " I inhaled sharply as his hands found their target and began to caress me. " An age at least to every part, and the last age should show your heart.' "

It was his turn to gasp as I reached for him and ran my fingers along his length, teasing and drawing him closer. We sank to the floor, still caught in our embrace, and kissed as he gently laid me back on our makeshift bed, then hovered over me, his eyes dark and his lips finding mine again.

" 'For, lady, you deserve this state, nor would I love at lower rate.'" He smiled as I readied myself and reached for him. " 'But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near,' " he said, and sank into me.

"I love you, Alex," I said, holding him to me with a desperate grip. "You're mine. Mine. I love you."

"And I ye, Mary Rose. Only ye. And ye forever."

We did not speak for a while.

Afterward, he helped me dress and laughed as I fumbled with my clothes, unable to do the simplest fastening. And then I watched him shrug his shirt on and calmly sling his kilt about his waist, both of us pretending not to hear the men outside the door. He took a deep breath and met my eyes as the door was tried and bumped against the table. Alex reached to pull the table away, then faced the soldiers who entered.

"Kilgannon!" one shouted, reaching for him with a drawn sword.

Alex took a step backward, pulling me with him in the circle of his arm, then leaning to retrieve my cloak. "I'll be right wi' ye, sirs," he said calmly.

But they didn't listen, taking Alex's arms from me and yanking him toward the door. They ignored his protests and mine as they dragged him away.