The Winter Wish (9 page)

“Sarah
spent the night here,” Lily continued, lifting one eyebrow.

“Yes.”

“Did
she spend the night with you?”

Devlin
gritted his teeth. “I believe you know the answer to that question or you would
not be here this morning. What do you want, Lady Kincaid?”

The
brunette snapped her shoulder blades together and lifted her chin. “Do not try
bullying
me
, Lord Heathcliff. I am not like Sarah—”

“I
never bullied her!” Devlin interrupted with a scowl.

“Oh
no? What would you call that little incident at Almacks?”

How
his quiet, shy little Sarah and this brash, rude woman were friends was an absolute
mystery. Taking a deep, steadying breath to calm himself, Devlin said, “That
was a mistake. One I have already apologized for, not that it concerns you.”

“
Everything
about Sarah concerns me, including her current welfare. Where is she? I want to
see her.” Without waiting for his permission Lily shouldered past and marched
up the stairs, Devlin hot on her heels.

“Stop
this instant,” he demanded, but she waved him off.

“Sarah!”
she called out, raising her voice so she could be heard above Devlin’s blustering.
“Sarah darling, can your hear me?”

The
door to the master bedroom opened and Sarah, dressed in nothing save a white
robe with her wet hair in tangles around her face, peeked out. “Devlin, what is
happen—LILY!” she gasped, clapping one hand over her mouth. “What in the world
are you
doing
here?”

“Exactly
what I want to know,” Devlin growled.

Seemingly
nonplussed by her friend’s lack of clothing, Lily all but flew down the hallway
and squeezed Sarah in a tight embrace that left them both breathless. “I had to
come see if you were all right, or if that man—” she paused to point an
accusing finger at Devlin “—had done something horrid to you.”

“Now
see here,” Devlin protested. “Sarah has come to no harm, in fact she…. Well,
she…” Realizing too late he had been about to make a regrettable blunder,
Devlin cut himself off as both women pivoted to face him and raised their
eyebrows.

“In
fact she… What, Devlin?” Sarah asked in a deceptively sweet voice. “Do go on.
Finish your sentence.”

He
looked down at the floor and cleared his throat. “I would rather not.”

“Why
Sarah, I do believe he is blushing!” Lily said in delight. “Oh, how the tables
have turned. Let us get you dressed, dear, and you can tell me all about it.”

When
Sarah glanced helplessly at him over her shoulder as Lily all but shoved her
back into the bedroom, Devlin shook his head and rolled his eyes. Sarah smiled,
as if to say, ‘
What would you have me do?’
and the exchange, though
small and silent, warmed Devlin’s heart.

He
knew now that what he once felt with Moira had been nothing more than a young
man’s lust. It had certainly not been love. No, love was what he felt when he
gazed upon Sarah.

He
loved it when she blushed – which he had taken particular delight in making her
do this morning – and he loved it when she got that little stutter in her
voice. He loved how sweet she was, and how kind. He loved how trusting she was,
and how honest. Last night they had hidden nothing from each other and Devlin
had never felt closer to another human being in his entire life. She was his
match, in every sense of the word, and if he had one regret it would only be
that he had overlooked her for so long.

As
a plan began to form in Devlin’s mind, he bounded down the stairs to make the
necessary preparations, leaving Lily and Sarah to their gossip of which he
could only hope showed him in the best possible light for he suspected – and
rightly so – that if the Lady Kincaid did not approve of him it would be an
uphill battle to win Sarah’s heart.

Inside
the master bedroom, Lily reclined belly down on the bed while Sarah combed out
her long hair and began to plait it into a braid.

At
first she had been reserved in sharing details of her heavenly night spent in
Devlin’s arms, but after enduring a barrage of merciless questions she had
finally caved in and, blushing head to toe, gave Lily a full report on what had
occurred, leaving no detail unspoken.

Her
friend listened with rapt attention, interrupting every once in a while with
little gems such as, “he did
what
?” and “oh, I would have positively
died
”
and (Sarah’s personal favorite) “I am going to faint”.

When
she was finally finished recanting her first experience with lovemaking, Sarah
sat on the bed beside Lily and wrapped her arms around her knees. “And then we
did it all over again this morning,” she confessed.

Lily
clapped a hand to her forehead. “And here I was worried you were being taken
advantage of.” Sitting up, she rearranged her skirts and crossed her legs at
the ankle. “You little minx,
you
seduced
him
! Sarah Emily Dawson,
I never though I would see the day. How do you feel this morning?”

“Wonderful.”
Sarah smiled. “Absolutely wonderful.”

“And
when is the big day?”

“The
big day?”

Lily
rolled her eyes. “The wedding, you ninny. When are you getting married? Why, even
now you could be, you know,” she paused to look pointedly at Sarah’s stomach, “
in
the family way
. There really is no time to waste.”

Sarah’s
smile faltered. “I… We… That has not been discussed yet.”

“That
has not been
discussed
yet? What is there to discuss! He ruined you,
thus he has to marry you.”

“He
did not
ruin
me,” Sarah protested, even as a seedling of doubt in the
back of her mind said otherwise. She and Devlin had yet to talk about the
future, but she had naturally assumed he would offer for her hand. Now she was
suddenly not so certain. Perhaps last night had not meant to him what it meant
to her. After all, he had probably had a thousand of those nights with a
hundred different women. How was she any different?
Why
would she be any
different? Because she loved him? Sarah winced at the thought.

She
did not know if love meant anything to Devlin, let alone if he even loved her
or would be capable of loving her. She was such a fool. A silly, presumptuous
fool who never learned from her mistakes and now may have made the most
grievous one of all.

“I
have to speak with him,” she decided. Leaving the bed, she picked up her
clothing that had dried in front of the fire overnight and began to dress
herself while Lily watched, worried concern marring her pretty face. “Help me
with the stays,” she implored, and Lily stood at once, crossing the room and
tightening the back of Sarah’s dress with four quick pulls.

“Everything
will be fine,” Lily assured her, although she could not quite keep the doubt
from creeping into her tone and Sarah heard it clear as a bell.

“You
said it yourself.” Sarah fretted anxiously with the end of her braid. “He
ruined me, Lily.”

“Ah
yes, well, perhaps that was a poor choice of words.”

“What
if he never wants to see me again?”

“Darling,
of
course
he wants to see you. He
loves
you. I saw it on his face
the moment I walked through the door. I was merely being cautious. You know how
I can be. Why, I bet at this very moment he is planning out his proposal.”

“No.”
Sarah shook her head and began to pace. “No, he is not. Why, by now he has
probably forgotten my name. What am I going to do, Lily? I w-wanted this to
happen but I never though it would
really
happen.”

Unbeknownst
to either woman, the bedroom door creaked open.

“Sarah?”
Devlin asked uncertainly, stepping into the room and taking in the harried
scene. “What is it? What is wrong?”

Lifting
tear drenched eyes to his, Sarah choked back a sob, shot past him, and fled.

In
the deafening silence that followed her abrupt retreat, Devlin rounded on Lily
with a snarl. He had never shaken a woman, but he was sorely tempted now,
especially after witnessing the naked pain he had seen flash across Sarah’s
face. The urge to help her, to protect her, was like a live thing inside of
him, clawing to get free. “What the hell did you say to her?” he demanded.

Helpless
to explain, Lily could only shake her head.

On
a vicious oath, Devlin spun on his heel and bolted out of the room.

CHAPTER
ELEVEN

Sarah
made it through the front door before she came up short and nViscounty flew off
the front steps in amazement at the sight that greeted her. There, in the
middle of the empty snow covered street, stood Devlin’s gray horse and sleigh.

Both
had been resplendently decked out in lavish red bows, ornate gold bells, and –
even though she had to squint to make them out – sprigs of mistletoe tied
together with silver ribbon.

“Do
you like it?” Devlin murmured from behind her. “I was coming upstairs to get
you. I wanted it to be a surprise.”

Sarah
startled slightly as Devlin draped her cloak – forgotten in her rush to flee –
over her shoulders. “Thank you,” she said absently, still distracted by the
sleigh and the possible implications of what such a grand gesture could mean.

Coming
to stand beside her, Devlin gently took her hand, his long fingers wrapping
easily around her smaller ones. “Come on a ride with me?”

She
hesitated. “Devlin, there is something I need to ask—”

“Come
on a ride with me,” he repeated. This time it was not a question.

Arm
in arm they walked down the steps. The gray horse waited patiently while Devlin
first helped Sarah into the sleigh before he went around to the other side and
climbed in himself. A flick of the reins, a cluck of his tongue, and they were
off, moving with a swift speed Sarah was more accustomed to the second time
around.

The
wind whistled past her cheeks and caught the hood of her cloak, nearly causing
it to fall from her head before she pulled it more firmly down around her ears.
Wordlessly Devlin reached down underneath the seat and pulled out the fur
blanket he had given her before. This time he used it to cover them both and
their thighs brushed intimately as the sleigh moved briskly down the street and
turned left, towards the park.

Sarah’s
heart pounded, so loud she feared Devlin would surely hear, but when she
sneaked a sideways glance at his profile she saw his attention was firmly fixed
on the winding path in front of them.

Taking
a deep breath she settled into the seat and forced herself to relax and enjoy
the scenery. Now that they were beyond the houses and shops of the city it
passed by in flashes of green and white, so pristine and clear it made Sarah
smile despite the aching in her heart. Winter may have been many things, but
ugly it was not, at least not in the typical sense of the word.

Despite
the frigid temperatures and the ice and bone chilling wind there was a
loveliness to all of it that many people failed to acknowledge. There was a
sense of magic as well, a soft tingling in the air that made one appreciate
their surroundings far more than usual. It filled Sarah with awareness, not
just for the beauty of a solitary pine standing guard over a field painted in
white, but for herself as a woman.

For
the first time she recalled the wish she had made in the darkened study with
only Lily to bare witness. A wish that had, for all intensive purposes, come
true threefold since it’s making.

I
wish Devlin would simply notice me
.    

Sarah
glanced at him again and this time he was looking back at her, his blue eyes
calm and soft with an emotion she dared not name. When he shifted the reins to
his left hand and raised the right to gently cup her cheek she leaned into the
pressure, closing her eyes and releasing a quiet sigh.

“You
are not a great beauty,” he said huskily.

Sarah’s
eyes shot open. “What d-did you say?” she said, her forehead creasing. She
would have drawn back, but he had begun tracing the curve of her jaw with his
thumb, and she was too weak a creature to deny herself such a simple pleasure.

“The
other women I have been with were all great beauties. Their hair was more
golden than yours, their lips more red, their bodies more voluptuous.” Here
Devlin paused and Sarah, who had grown more and more incredulous with every word
he spoke, finally jerked free of his grasp and wedged herself into the farthest
corner of the seat she could reach.  

“If
you are trying to pay me compliments you are not doing a very good job!” 

“Oh,”
said Devlin, his blue eyes gleaming and his dimples flashing, “I am paying you
the biggest compliment of all. These women,” he continued, apparently oblivious
to the fact that Sarah did
not
want to hear of anyone else he had slept
with, “were so beautiful it often pained me to look upon them, for I knew beneath
their glittering smiles and batting eyelashes they were as cold and empty as
porcelain dolls. They cannot love another, you see, for they are already in
love with themselves. I knew this, and in knowing it pursued them all the more,
for I did not seek love, I sought beauty and all the coldness it brought with
it.”