"You worn me, Ricki Sue. It's dangerous to have multiple partners."
"I'm careful. Always have been."
"I'm sure you are, but"
"Listen, kid, don't lecture. I do the best I can with what I've got. When you look like me, you gotta take what you can get from men. I don't know of one who's gonna fall head over heels for this." She spread her arms at her sides.
"So, rather than get my heart broken time after time, or be a perpetual wallflower and end up a bitter old maid, I made up my mind years ago to be accommodating.
"I give 'em what they wane, and I've got a real talent for it. When the lights are out and everybody's naked, they don't care if you look like a fairy princess or a warthog so long as you've got a eight, warm place for them to put it. It all feels good in the dark, kid."
"Thee's such a sad and sordid philosophy."
"Works for me."
"But how do you know that one of these days Mr. Right isn't going to come sweeping into your life?"
Ricki Sue's laugh sounded like a foghorn. "I'd have a beeper chance of winning the lottery." Then her smile faded and she became introspective. "Don't be misled. I'd trade my life for yours in a New York minute. I'd love to have a husband, a bunch of rowdy kids, the whole package.
"But since that's not likely, I refuse to do without the fun stuff. I take whatever affection I can get and in whatever form.
Behind my back, I know people say, 'How can she lee men use her like that?" The truth is, I use them. Because unfortunately .
. ." She paused to eye Kendall up and down with good-natured envy. "All women are not created equal. I look like a walrus with a good henna rinse, and you're . . . well, ,.
you.
"Don't put yourself down. Besides, I thought you loved me for my mind," Kendall teased.
"Oh, you're smart all right. So smart you frankly scare the hell out of me. And you've got more guts than anybody I ever ran across, and I've run across some pretty tough hombres."
Teasing aside, she looked at Kendall solemnly. "I'm glad things worked out for you here, kid. You took one hell of a chance. You're still taking a chance."
"To some extent, yes," Kendall agreed. "But I'm not worried. Too much time has passed. If it was going to come crashing down, it would have by now."
"I don't know," Ricki Sue said doubtfully. "I still think you're crazy as a bedbug for going through with it. And if I had it to do over again, I'd still advise you against it. Does Matt know?"
Kendall shook her head.
"Shouldn't you tell him?"
"What for?"
"Because he's your husband, for crying out loud!"
"Exactly. What difference would it make in how he feels about me?"
Ricki Sue mulled that over for a moment. "What does your grandma think?"
"The same as you," she admitted reluctantly. "She urged me to tell him."
Elvie Hancock was the only parent Kendall remembered, having been orphaned when she was five. She had reared Ken dall with a firm but loving hand. On most matters of importance, Kendall agreed with her. She trusted the woman's instincts and valued the wisdom of her advanced years.
But on the issue of being totally honest with Matt, they had differing opinions. Kendall was convinced that her way was best. Quietly she said, "You and Grandmother must trust me on this, Ricki Sue."
"Okay, kid. But if a skeleton pops out of your closet and bites you on the butt, don't say I didn't warn you."
Laughing at the image Ricki Sue's words had painted, Ken dall leaned forward and embraced her. "I miss you. Promise you'll come to visit often."
Ricki Sue folded the hand towel with more care than it warranted. "I don't think that'd be such a good idea."
Kendall's smile collapsed. "Why not?"
"Because your husband and his daddy have made plain their feelings for me. No, don't apologize," Ricki Sue hastened to say when she saw that Kendall was about to protest. "I don't give a rat's ass what they think of me. They remind me too much of my own self-righteous parents for me to care about their opinion. Oh, hell. I didn't mean to put them down, it's just . . ." Her heavily made up eyes pleaded for Kendall's understanding. "I don't want to be the cause of any problems."
Kendall knew exactly what her friend was trying to express, and the sentiment made her appreciate Ricki Sue all the more.
"I miss you and Grandmother more than I realized I would, Ricki Sue. Tennessee seems very far away. I need a friend."
"Make one."
"I've tried, so far without success. The women here are polite, but distant. Maybe they resent me for blowing into town and stealing Matt from them. Or maybe my career puts them off. Their lives seem to have a different focus than mine.
Anyway, nobody could replace you as my best friend. Please don't write me off."
"I'm not writing you off, God knows. I don't have that many friends myself. But let's be practical about this." She pressed Kendall's shoulders between her hands. "Other than me, your last remaining link to Sheridan, Tennessee, is your grandmother. When she dies, turn your back on that town forever, Kendall. Sever all ties there, including me. Don't press your luck."
Kendall nodded thoughtfully, acknowledging the merit of her friend's advice. "Grandmother won't live much longer. I wish she had moved here with me, but she refused to leave her home. This separation is breaking my heart. You know how important she is to me."
"And vice versa. She loves you. She's always wanted what's best for you. If you're happy, she'll die happy. That's the best you can wish for her."
Kendall knew that Ricki Sue was right. Her throat tightened. "Look after her for me, Ricki Sue."
"I call her every day and go see her at least twice a week, just like I promised I would." She took Kendall's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Now, I'd like to get back to the party and all that wonderful champagne and food. Maybe I can wheedle another dance out of that druggist. He's kinda cute, don't you think?"
"He's married."
"So? They're usually the ones most desperate for some of Ricki Sue's famous tender loving care." She patted her large breasts.
"Shame on you!"
"Sorry, that word's not in my vocabulary." Chuckling deeply, she scooted Kendall aside and opened the door. "I'm outta here. Much as I'd like to stick around and see how you go about it."
"Go about what?"
"Taking a leak in a wedding gown."
Chapter 2
Will there be anything else, miss?"
The question yanked Kendall from her daydream about her wedding. She remembered even the smallest details of that day, but she felt completely removed from it, as if it had happened to someone else, or in another lifetime.
"That's all, thank you," she replied to the clerk.
Despite the inclement weather, Wal-Mart was packed with customers. The aisles were jammed with shopping carts filled with everything from roller skates to rolling pins.
"One forty-two seventy-seven. Cash, check, or charge'
, The young man hadn't taken any particular notice of her.
She was just one of hundreds of customers to be checked out that day. If asked later, he wouldn't recall her, couldn't describe her. Anonymity was what she sought.
Last night, when she finally lay down in the bed in Stephensville Community Hospital, she had been more tired than she remembered being in her entire life. Her whole body was sore and throbbing from the accident. The ordeal of getting out of the ravine had left her with cuts and bruises that hurt worse the longer the night wore on.
She had desperately craved oblivion, but she had lain awake throughout the night.
Who are you? Who am I?
He's my husband.
The words had echoed inside her head. From her pillow, she had stared with gritty eyes at the acoustical tile ceiling, replaying those words in her mind and wondering if having spoken them would turn out to be fortune or folly. It was too late now to recall them, and even if she could she wouldn't.
His amnesia was only temporary. So, while he was locked in forgetfulness, she had to make the most of it. She hoped this would give her time to save Kevin and herself. After all, saving Kevin was the purpose behind everything she had done thus far. Protecting the baby was worth taking any chance, even one this risky.
He had caused quite a scene when informed that he had amnesia. His recovery would require rest and relaxation, the doctor had told him. He would have to take it easy in order for his leg to heal, so why not enjoy the unexpected, imposed vacation? The more pressure he placed on himself to regain his memory, the more elusive it would become. A mind under duress could be stubbornly uncooperative. He was continually urged to relax.
But he hadn't relaxed, not even when, at the doctor's suggestion, Kendall carried Kevin into his room. The sight of the child had only increased his agitation, which didn't abate until a nurse took Kevin away.
The doctor, much more subdued than he had been earlier, had tried to reassure Kendall. "I recommend that we let him rest undisturbed through the night. Amnesia's tricky. Tomorrow morning when he wakes up, he'll probably remember everything."
At first light, she had dressed in a uniform one of the nurses loaned her and anxiously returned to his room. His memory had not been restored during the night.
When she walked in, he self-consciously raised the sheet to his waist. The nurse had just completed giving him a bed bath, which had obviously embarrassed him. She withdrew, taking the paraphernalia with her and leaving them alone.
Kendall gestured awkwardly. I am sure they both made you feel better."
"Some. But I hated it."
"Generally speaking, men make terrible patients., She gave him a wavering smile and moved closer. "Is there anything I can do to make you more comfortable?"
"No, I'm fine. Are you okay? You and the kid?, "Miraculously, Kevin and I walked away unScathed., He nodded. "That's good."
Kendall could tell that even this much Conversation was taxing him. "I've got some things to attend to» but if you need anything, don't hesitate to call the nurses, They seem competent."
Again he nodded, this time without comment She was about to leave, when, as an afterthought' she turned back, leaned over him, and kissed his forehead. His eyes, which had closed, opened suddenly. Their impact reduced Kendall's voice to a hushed whisper. "Rest weld I'll be in to see you later."
She hastily left his room. Shortly afterward, She approached a nurse and said, "I need to run some errands. Is there taxi service?"
Laughing, the nurse produced a set of car keys. "Forget calling a taxi in this town, honey. My car is Yours to use until my shift ends at three this afternoon. Take my raincoat, too."
"Thank you so much." She had welcomed this unexpected generosity. "Kevin needs some essentials and I Can't continue dressing in a nurse uniform. I really need to do a bit of shopping."
The nurse gave her directions to Wal-Mart, then said hesitantly, "Forgive me for getting personal, hone,". But, seeing as how your stuff, including all your identification, went down -with the car, how're you fixed for cash?"
"Fortunately I had some money zipped into a pocket of my jacket," she told the nurse, who would have been shocked at the amount of cash Kendall actually had on her. It was more than just "spending money." She had saved a lot, anticipating a catastrophe such as this. She and Kevin could survive for long time on what she had. "Alittle wet, but spendable. I can afford to buy some things for Kevin and myself, and find up a place to stay."
"This one-horse town only has one shabby motor courts Don't spend your money on that. As long as you need a bed you can stay here at the hospital."
"That's very kind of you'd
"Don't mention it. Besides, when your husband recovers his memory, you'll wane to be here, day or night." She touched Kendall's arm consolingly. "This is a lot for you to handle all by yourself. Are you sure there's no one you can call to help out? Family?"'
"No one. We don't have an extended family. And by the way, I wane to thank you and the rest of the staff for agreeing not to mention the fatality to my husband. He's already confused and upset. I see no reason to make matters worse."
The deputy too had agreed that sharing that information with the amnesiac was unnecessary at this point. The Officer had returned to the hospital that morning to give Kendall an update about the car. Divers had been sent down, he told her but had not been able to locate the wreckage. Apparently it had been washed far downstream from the site of the accident Shaking his head with regret, he said it was anyone'S guess when and where it might turn up. "Bingham Creek runs through pure-dee wilderness for the most part. The ground is too saturated to get heavy equipment in there. Since it looks like we're in for more rain, it'll probably do just that. de's safe to go exploring."
They were without positive identification.. For the time being, the wrecked car and everything inside it would be several days before No one knew where they were. He had amnesia. She had time.
If she kept her cool and was very clever, she could escape with a good head start. If she failed, the consequences would be terrible. But since when had possible consequences deterred her from taking action when action was called for? She had been desperate when she moved to Prosper.
And even more desperate when she fled.
"Miss?"
Kendall shook herself alert. "I'm sorry. Did you say something?"
"Yes ma'am?" The Wal-Mart clerk was looking at her with puzzlement. The last thing she wanted was to call his attention to the woman in the nurse's uniform who seemed dazed and disoriented.