Then He Kissed Me (8 page)

“He did
not
say that,” Lauren said.

Kitty laughed. “Oh yes, he did. Basically, I was supposed to help Ted buy a bunch of beach front property, almost all of which belongs to Earl Handy. Including the old senior center and the land it’s on. But in the end, Earl decided to sell the building back to the city and squashed Ted’s plans.”

“Thanks to Kitty helping old Earl see the light,” Shea said.

“Earl’s your great uncle, isn’t he?” Pilar asked Lauren.

Lauren nodded. “He’s Daddy’s uncle, but we don’t see him very much. He’s…suffering from dementia.”

“Too bad,” Kitty said. “He was sharp as a tack just a couple of years ago.”

“If Earl is your great uncle, does that mean you’re rich, too?” Frida asked.

“All the Handy’s are rich,” someone said.

Mimi made a face. “Unfortunately, I must disagree with that.”

“That’s right, you’re a Handy, too.” Frida looked between Lauren and Mimi. “How are you two related, again?”

“I think we’re like third cousins or something,” Mimi said. “But honestly, I think I’m related to half the town. Lauren’s granddaddy was Earl’s younger brother and it’s Earl’s side of the family that was smart enough to buy up all the beachfront property.”

Lauren squirmed in her seat. It was true. Daddy was from the wealthy side of Whispering Bay’s Handy clan. It was his daddy who had set up a trust fund for all his grandchildren, Lauren included. She knew she was lucky, and she was certainly grateful, but at the same time, she also felt a bit…unworthy. Despite the fact her daddy had been born with a silver spoon in his mouth, he’d worked hard to build up his own business. Just like Lauren planned to do herself.

“It looks like Ted hasn’t changed his ways. At least not with women,” Lauren said, hoping to change the subject off money.

“Well, I wouldn’t have gotten in a car with that sort of derogatory bumper sticker, either,” Pilar said, “so good for you!”

“And good for Nate Miller giving you a ride home, but you should have called me,” Mimi said.

“I would have, but I hated to interrupt your night with Zeke. Plus, there was a crowd gathering and I didn’t trust you to not flatten Ted on his ass. Believe me, I was tempted, but I’m not running for mayor.”

“Thanks for looking out for my rep. You’re right, if he’d still been there I would have probably had a few choice words for him and ended up on the front page of the Gazette.”

“Speaking of mayoral campaigns,” Kitty said, “The election is less than a few months away and we need to discuss your next fundraiser.”

“I say we sell tickets and have women take turns throwing rocks at Ted Ferguson,” Frida said. “We’ll make a fortune.”

Everyone had a good laugh at that, then spent the next ten minutes or so brainstorming ideas. “What about doing some kind of craft booth at the
Spring Into Summer
festival?” Shea suggested.

“The election is in April, so that won’t help,” Kitty said.

The annual
Spring Into Summer
festival was a day long affair that was always held the first Saturday in June. The opening ceremonies began with a 10K run along the beach. There were food trucks and arts and crafts booths for the adults, and bounce houses and sack races for the kids. The festival always concluded with a concert and a dance. Most of the local businesses advertised heavily, some of them by giving away promos or helping to underwrite the festival itself. Last year, Lauren’s business was in its infancy and she hadn’t had time to get a booth together. But this year she hoped to sponsor one to promote the shop.

“How much does a booth cost?” Lauren asked.

“Two hundred,” Pilar said. “Unless you’re a non-profit.”

That sounded reasonable enough. She could do a whole summer wardrobe preview.  People came from all over the panhandle for the festival so it was good advertisement. Not that Lauren thought it would turn her business around, but she had to try something.

Kitty rang the Bunco bell to get their attentions back on track. “As Mimi’s campaign manager, I say we focus on a grassroots movement. Let’s face it, we aren’t going to outspend Bruce Bailey, but we sure can outman him. I suggest we start a door-to-door campaign. We have enough money in the campaign treasury to print out flyers and Pilar’s already come up with an awesome slogan,
Mimi For Mayor
. It’s short, and sweet, and everyone already knows who she is, so there’s no use beating a dead horse.”

“I could probably get my mother to help,” Lauren said. She thought back to what Nate said to her the other day at the office. How Momma was at high risk for depression. She had to reluctantly agree, but Momma didn’t need drugs; she needed something to get her mind off Daddy’s problems. Of course, she was already the Queen of the Fundraiser. With only twenty-four hours in a day it was amazing how much she managed to squeak in.

Lauren’s cell phone pinged. Speak of the devil. It was a text message from Momma.

The eagle has landed!!!! Call me ASAP.

Lauren had no idea what that meant, but she was afraid it might have something to do with Momma’s matchmaking scheme. Especially given the number of exclamation marks she’d used. If it was truly important, Momma would have just called, so Lauren ignored it for now. She’d call her later tonight after Bunco.

Kitty glanced down at her day planner. “Okay, so…on to the next order of business. Couples Bunco.”

“Who’s hosting this year?” someone asked.

“That would be Shea and Moose.” This news was met with a whole lot of clapping and general merriment.

“What’s couples Bunco?” Lauren asked.

“That’s the only night of the year when we let our significant others play with us,” Frida said. “They make a whole lot of noise about how they have be dragged here kicking and screaming, when in reality, they love it. Ed’s already been bugging me about the date.”

“Oh, but it’s just for the regular members, right? Not the subs?”

The room quieted and everyone turned to look at Lauren. Kitty pierced her with a mysterious smile. “Which brings me to my next order of business. Ladies! May I have your attention! I have some sad news and some good news. The sad news, we already know. Christi’s husband is being transferred to Alabama and she has to quit the Babes. As a matter of fact,” she said, talking directly to Lauren, “that’s who you’re subbing for tonight. As for the good news, you’re officially our newest member!”

“
Me
?” Lauren said. Which was a dumb question, because of course they meant
her. “
Oh, my God!
Yes
!
Yes
! I Accept!”

This was met with squeals and shouts and ended with everyone coming up to Lauren to give her a big group hug. “Margaritas for everyone!” Shea cried, then she and Pilar went around refilling drinks.

 “Just water for me, thanks,” Kitty said. She waited till some of the commotion died down. “So, back to the agenda. I’m sorry to say that I’m going to have change the date for couples Bunco.”

Shea frowned. “But we already agreed we’d play the last Saturday in May. It’s on the calendar.”

“That’s right,” Frida said. “You can’t just up and change the calendar.”

“Then you’ll have to play without me and Steve because we’ll be busy that weekend…having our baby!” Then she let out a scream of happiness.

Within seconds, Kitty was enveloped in the same group hug that Lauren had just been a recipient of. There was shouting and laughter and tears. Lots and lots of tears.

Pilar wiped her eyes dry. “The end of May! That means you’re almost five months along. You,
bitch
! How could you not tell us? How could you not tell
me
? I’ve been your best friend since grade school!”

“I can’t believe
you
of all people kept that a secret for so long!” Shea said to Kitty. Then she stuck her tongue out at Pilar. “And
I’ve
been Kitty’s best friend since before you, remember?”

Kitty laughed. “I wanted to tell you all, I really did.” She ran her hand down her loose shirt, revealed a small baby bump. “But you know I’m thirty-seven now and I just…it was sort of cool having just Steve and I know for so long. Kind of like our little secret.”

She shrugged, her face glowing with happiness, and Lauren couldn’t help but feel a little wistful. Her own pregnancy announcement had been met with tears, too. But they had been tears of disappointment. The look on Momma and Daddy’s face… Lauren would never forget it. But in the end, everything had turned out all right. She could never ever regret having Henry. Not for anything in the world.

“So if we could move couples Bunco just a few weeks earlier, Steve and I and Baby Pappas sure would appreciate it,” Kitty continued.

“What are you having?” Frida asked.

“We didn’t want to know. So it’ll be a surprise.”

Everyone began talking again. “Looks like we won’t be playing Bunco tonight,” Mimi said. “There’s too much to celebrate!”

Lauren smiled. Tonight was overwhelming and wonderful, and the tears, it seemed, just kept coming. Not because of Kitty’s news. Oh, she was happy for Kitty. No doubt about that. But the tears of happiness were for herself. It was silly, she knew, but the past year and a half had been stressful. There was the divorce, and Daddy’s illness, and the daily worry that her shop wasn’t going to make it. Having friends meant something. It meant Whispering Bay was really beginning to feel like home again.

*~*~*

L
auren lived just a
block away from Kitty. It was a beautiful old neighborhood with most of the Spanish style houses originally built back in the twenties and thirties. She and Henry were leasing one of the smaller homes in the area. The night was clear and cool and the smell of chimney smoke hung in the air. She’d enjoyed living in Atlanta, but she’d missed the simplicity of small town living. Of walking home from an evening spent with friends. She pulled out her cell phone and called her mother. “Hey, Momma.”

“Where have you been? Didn’t you get my text message?”

“Yes, but I have no idea what you’re talking about. Who’s the eagle and how’s Daddy’s hand?”

“Hey, Sweet Tea!” she heard Daddy yell in the background. Lauren instantly smiled. “See, he’s fine,” Momma said. “I, on the other hand have been a nervous wreck. Guess who I talked to this afternoon?
Paula
!”

The name sounded familiar. “Who’s Paula again?”

“My friend from the club who knows Nate Miller’s sister.”

“Oh, that’s nice.” Lauren’s stomach began to fizzle. Maybe she shouldn’t have had that last margarita.

“And she says Melanie, that’s Nate’s sister, is such a lovely girl!” There was a pause. “Did you know she was a lesbian? It used to be you could tell, but now, who knows these days? They look just like everyone else. Anyway, she’s totally on board with trying to fix you up with Nate! Oh, sweetie, that
poor man
. Did you know he proposed to some
awful
girl last weekend at The Harbor House? Apparently, it even made the news.”

“It was on YouTube, Momma.”

“That’s what I said. Anyway, lucky for us she turned him down. You’ve got to strike now while the iron is hot. Otherwise, he’ll be scooped up before you know it. He’s Whispering Bay’s newest most eligible bachelor!”

“Momma…can we talk about this later?”
As in, never
.

“Of course, honey. I just wanted you to know I was making progress.”

“Sounds good,” Lauren said absent-mindedly. She really shouldn’t worry. This was all going to come to nothing. Even if Nate’s sister really did want to fix him up, there was no way he would ever agree to go out with Lauren. No way what-so-ever.

“N
ate, can I have
a moment?” Doc motioned him into his office. “Have a seat.” Nate took the chair across from the desk. He crossed his ankle over his knee and sat back to take a breather. He’d seen almost twenty patients this morning. It was his best personal record. So far.

Doc sat on the couch next to the window. “How are things going?”

“Just fine, sir.”

Doc smiled kindly. But then, Nate didn’t think he’d ever heard the older gentleman utter a cross word. “No need to call me sir. Makes me feel old.” He chuckled. “Of course, I am old, I suppose. One day you’re thirty and just beginning your career, and before you know it, you’re hitting sixty-five, and there’s grandkids and everyone’s asking you when you’re going to retire.”

Nate nodded. Doc looked at him but didn’t say anything, making Nate think he was waiting for a verbal response. “When exactly are you going to retire, sir, um, I mean, Phillip?” It was odd, calling Doc by his first name, but they were colleagues now. And he’d already said he didn’t want to be called ‘sir.’

“You don’t mince words, do you? Generally, I like that in a person. Honesty is an admirable quality, Nate. But…occasionally, a more subtle approach is required. Take for instance, yesterday, when you told Frances Kiefer that she was too fat.”

Nate sat up straight. “I never said she was fat. I believe I used the term clinically obese. Her BMI was over forty.”

“Yes, but in her mind, that’s what she heard. She came to me this morning, crying.”

 “Because she’s worried about her chances of developing diabetes and hypertension? I don’t blame her. According to her records she has a strong family history of both heart attack and stroke. I’m glad she’s taking my warning seriously.”

Doc made a pained face. “I don’t think you understand what I’m trying to say here. Mrs. Kiefer is fully aware that she needs to lose weight. I’ve been telling her that for years. Oh, she’ll go on a fad diet and lose twenty pounds but then she’ll gain it all back and more afterward. Lecturing her isn’t going to get her to change her habits. It’s only going to make her avoid going to the doctor. Understand?”

“Not really. If I can’t tell her the truth, then how I am supposed to help her?”

“By easing her into a conversation. By
gently
reminding her about nutrition programs, exercise, that sort of thing.”

“And…that’s what you’ve been doing all these years?” Nate cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, sir, um, Phillip, but it doesn’t seem that it’s worked.”

“No, I guess it hasn’t,” he admitted, “but your approach isn’t going to help, either. Just think about what I’ve said, Nate. Talk to the patients. Get to know them. That’s why they come here, you know. Take Dan Handy and his family. Dan was one of my first patients. Did you know that?”

Nate slowly shook his head. He had a bad feeling about what was coming next. He hadn’t liked the way he’d left things with Lauren Donalan the other day. She’d been angry with him, although, why, Nate couldn’t say. He’d been worried about her father. He thought she’d appreciate that. Instead, she’d called him
Mr. Spock
. Had she spoken to Doc about him as well? Having Mrs. Kiefer complain about him was bad enough, but if Lauren had done the same… For some reason, the idea made his stomach twist into knots.

“I went to Florida with Dan,” Doc continued. “We’re frat brothers. When I came back to practice medicine, oh, thirty-five years or so ago, there wasn’t a doctor in Whispering Bay. Everyone was going over to Panama City. I set up my shingle and I think I had ten patients that first week. Then Dan came to me on the pretense that he needed a physical. Told everyone that worked for him at his accounting firm that they needed physicals, too, and that the company would pay for them. Then he started sending over his whole family. And I don’t mean just Maureen. The whole Handy family started coming to me—Earl, and Margaret, rest her soul, and all their kids and all the aunts and uncles and cousins and, well, hell, you know them. Half the town is a Handy or related to one of them. Even though old Earl lives in Mexico Beach now, I’m still his doctor.”

It seemed as if the anecdote concerning Dan Handy was winding down. But Nate wanted to make sure. “So…Dan Handy’s daughter didn’t come to you with any complaints about me?”

Doc looked surprised. “No, should she have?”

“Absolutely not.” Nate felt the knots in his stomach ease up. “You’re a fine physician. They’re lucky to have you care for them.”

“I’m not looking for compliments. I’m telling you like it is. All those people I told you about? They don’t come to see me because I’m the best doctor in the area, they come to see me because they know I care about them. Because I know that Frances Kiefer isn’t going to be nagged into losing weight, so I joke about it with her and she laughs back and promises me that next visit she’ll be twenty pounds thinner. And I hope and pray for her sake that this is the visit that wakes her up. But mostly, I hope that she’ll never be too embarrassed or too nervous to tell me the truth about what’s going on, because then I really can’t help her.” He pointed to a framed cross stich embroidery next to his medical school diploma. “See that there?”

YOU LIE TO THE POLICE. NOT TO YOUR DOCTOR.

Nate had noticed it, of course. He had assumed it was a gift, but the saying hadn’t resonated with him.

“One day, years ago when I was just a tadpole, I had this fella come see me whose blood pressure was too high. So I put him on some antihypertensive, can’t remember which one right now, and I tell him to come back in a month and we’ll see how he’s doing. So he comes back, and this time, his blood pressure is even higher and I can’t figure it out. I ask him if he’s taking the medication every day, and he looks me straight in the eye and says, ‘Oh, yeah, Doc, I’m taking my pills.’ So I double the dose and tell him to come back in two weeks. Same thing. Blood pressure’s still high. And I can’t figure it out, until Lola turns around and just out and asks him why he isn’t taking his medication.”

“Let me guess,” Nate said, “he didn’t like the side-effects.”

“Exactly. Only he was too embarrassed to tell me, and I wasn’t smart enough to sit down and ask him how he was feeling. How he was
really
feeling. So I’m sitting there, still kind of stunned, and Lola laughs and tells him, ‘We’re not here to arrest you, we’re here to make you feel better. You lie to the police, not to your doctor.’”

Nate knew what was happening here. This was one of those touchy-feely moments when he was supposed to act as if everything suddenly became clear. It was a nice sentiment, this taking the time to chat with your patients, and it certainly worked for Doc Morrison. But Nate wasn’t Doc. He had his own skill set, his own way of talking to patients, and yes, maybe he was a bit blunt, but on the other hand, he didn’t keep patients stewing for hours in the waiting room, either. According to the latest patient surveys, long waiting room times were the number one reason for patient dissatisfaction.

He glanced at his watch. “Is there anything else you wanted to see me about?”

Doc sighed heavily. “Arlene talked me into one of those Mediterranean cruises. Apparently there’s a whole group here in town that’s planning to go. Two weeks in the middle of July. You’ll be going solo here at the office then. Think you can handle it?”

“Of course.” Nate was actually looking forward to it. When Doc returned from his vacation to find the office functioning even better than when he’d left it, he’d ease up and realize that he’d done the right thing all those years ago in giving Nate that scholarship. Maybe he’d even feel good enough about the whole thing that he’d retire. Not that Nate didn’t enjoy working alongside Doc; he just didn’t want Doc to feel he’d made a mistake taking him on.

*~*~*

N
ate opened the exam
room door to find his sister lying on the table with a magazine over her face to block out the light. “What are you doing in here?” he asked.

Lanie pulled the magazine down. “Don’t yell at Broom Hilda, she said I could cool my heels in here.” She swung her legs over to the side of the table and sat up.

“I assume you’re talking about Lola? I would never yell at her.”

“Yeah, her,” Lanie said. “Why doesn’t she like you?”

“Why aren’t you at work? Don’t you have a stray cat to rescue?”

“Speaking of which, you’ll be happy to know I put one of those puppies aside for you. A little guy. So cute and warm and cuddly. I’ve named him Hector in honor of your love of Greek mythology. You’ll forget all about Jessica in no time.”

Nate frowned. His sister knew well and good he had no interest in Greek mythology and truth was, he hadn’t thought about Jessica all week. There was something rather disturbing about that. Not the Greek mythology part, but the bit about Jessica. If he’d really loved her enough to marry her, shouldn’t he be depressed they were no longer together? “Speaking of Jessica, I’m actually glad you’re here. I want to get your thoughts on something.”

Lanie brightened. “Finally! You’ve decided to come to me for advice. Okay, what it is?”

“It’s the ring. I need to return it, naturally, and I was thinking I could put the money back into my savings, but Mom hasn’t been on a vacation in years. And never a fancy one. Doc is going on a Mediterranean cruise in July. Apparently, there’s a group from town going. Maybe Mom might like to get in on that. If it’s not too late. I’d have to look into it but—”

“I love it! And I especially love the irony that it’s Jessica’s ring money that will pay for it. Good idea, bro.” Lanie slipped off the table and gave him a hug. “I don’t care what anyone says, you
do
have a heart.”

First Jessica, then Frances Kiefer, and now Lanie. He was beginning to feel paranoid. Why did everyone think he was heartless?

“So, back to my reason for being here. I know you, Nate, better than you know yourself sometimes, and this thing with Jessica is going to eat away at your self-confidence. Soon, you’ll be eating microwave dinners in front of the T.V. and before you know it, you’ll be like the lonely old man from
Up
, except he at least was a widower. But this isn’t a Disney movie, bro, and there won’t be any chubby adorable boy scout ringing the doorbell to come save you.”

“Do we really share the same DNA?”

“Positive. So, here’s my plan. I’m not going to let you wallow and stew and be afraid to ask another girl out for fear of rejection, so I’ve taken the liberty to set you up on a date for this Saturday.”

“
This
Saturday? As in, tomorrow night?” His voice cracked like he was thirteen-fucking-years-old again.

Lanie grinned. “It’s taken me twenty-eight years but I think I’ve actually managed to shock you. Yes, this Saturday.”

“Last Saturday I asked a woman to marry me, and now, one week later, you expect me to ask another woman out?”

“Not ask her out. No. That’s already been done. All you have to do is show up. I’m even going to pay for it, even though you make a lot more money than I do because that’s how much I love you. And don’t say no because…you’ll hurt her feelings. She’s been divorced for over a year now and hasn’t gone out on a single date because she’s been traumatized. If you stand her up then she’ll probably go over the edge. Think about your Hippocratic Oath to do good and all that. Don’t you want to help this poor girl out?”

“I prefer the more modern oath of First Do No Harm.” He stilled. “Who is this girl? Do I know her?”

“Here’s the sweet part. You went to high school with her! She used to be Lauren Handy, but now she’s Lauren—”

Nate began to laugh.

“What’s so funny?”

“You set me up on a date with Lauren Donalan? Are you on drugs?” He pulled out his pen light and did a quick inspection of her pupils.
Huh
. Both were equal and reactive to light. He placed his palm against her forehead. Her skin felt warm and dry. “Okay, so most likely, no to the drugs.”

Lanie frowned. “What’s wrong with her? Does she have an extra leg or something?”

“Did she actually say she’d go out with me?”

“Well…her mother set it up through Paula Zimmerman. Paula did a big fundraiser for the shelter last month and she’s friends with the mom, Maureen Handy. She’s kind of a blast from the past, old school-debutante and all that, but she’s a nice lady. And I don’t mind telling you that Maureen is loaded and made a very substantial contribution to the shelter, so yeah, can you please come through for me on this?”

Nate knew there was no way Lauren Donalan would ever agree to this date. And as for Lanie’s little fairytale that Lauren hadn’t gone out since her divorce, well, Nate could tell her a few things about that. He wondered what his sister would say if he told her that poor traumatized Lauren had been at The Harbor House the night he’d proposed to Jessica.

“I’ll tell you what. If Lauren Donalan agrees to the date, then I’ll show up. How about that?”

“Perfect! Now, when should I bring Hector by your house?”

“When pigs fly.”