Read Things We Didn't Say Online
Authors: Kristina Riggle
5. What do you think lies at the root of Michael’s perfectionism? Can you relate to his perfectionism in some way?
6. How does Michael’s perfectionism affect him and his family? Does he realize how his actions take a toll on others?
7. Michael and Mallory had sharply different upbringings and seem like a case of opposites attracting. Do you know of couples like this, apparent mismatches who are trying to make it work? Is it ever possible to make it last?
8. Is there a scenario in which Michael and Mallory could have lasted as a couple, or was their relationship doomed from the start?
9. Do you perceive Mallory as villain, victim, innocent, or some combination of these? Does her character elicit compassion or frustration, or both?
10. Do you believe Mallory has undiagnosed mental health problems? How much responsibility does she bear for her own actions?
11. The children each have their own struggles, which they seem reluctant to share with their parents for various reasons. What could Michael have done to get his children to open up? Is it inevitable that children have secrets from their parents?
12. Do you think social class plays a role in the characters’ relationships and conflicts? If so, how, and to what end?
13. How does the title relate to each character’s story? What are the things they didn’t say and what difference would it have made if they’d spoken up?
14. Are there things in your own life you never say out loud? If so, why don’t you share what you think? If you speak your mind, do you feel that it always helps the situation, or do you ever regret things you’ve said?
15. How optimistic (or pessimistic) do you feel for the family at the end of the book? What are some things you imagine happening to the characters after the book’s ending?
A Conversation with the Author
What inspired this novel?
I was imagining how an external crisis impacts our internal lives. What if a woman was ready to walk out and leave a situation she could no longer tolerate, but something prevented her from doing so, some kind of immediate and sudden disaster? When the crisis was over, what would she do, then? Would she still go? How would she be able to conduct herself through the crisis knowing what she’d been prepared to do? Oddly enough, this line of thinking came up after watching the movie
Thirteen Days
about the Cuban missile crisis. I’d been imagining someone enduring family strife, and on top of that, this frightening global threat hanging over her head. Casey and Michael’s disaster is not of national scope, but it’s significant enough to bring everything else in their lives to a halt. I call this book a messy, grown-up love story because real love must be able to endure through the worst, most confusing and difficult times. Sometimes love alone isn’t enough to sustain a couple when the storm comes, as it always will.
Why did you choose to write about a blended family?
As I just mentioned, it’s a messy, grown-up love story and it’s also a contemporary story. Families come in all varieties now, and sometimes that means a young woman falls in love with a man who comes prepackaged with three kids. I’m in awe of the optimism and determination of those who create blended families. By their very nature, these couples walk into a new relationship bearing scars of the past—moreso than those who have never been married before—and I find their willingness to give it another try inspiring. I also wanted to write about a competent single dad who has primary custody of his kids, because it goes against the grain of the pop-culture stereotype of the distant or bumbling divorced dad. These characters come out of my imagination, I should say. I count blended families among my friends, certainly, but I didn’t quiz them for this book and in fact spoke very little about it as I was writing. I didn’t want to excavate their private lives, or put them on the spot.
You’re back to a real setting for this book, as opposed to the fictional town in your previous novel. Why are you back to a real spot on the map?
The Life You’ve Imagined
had a bigger canvas: it took place over the course of a whole summer, and featured many kinds of settings. For that situation I wanted optimum flexibility to make up landscapes as they suited the story. For
Things We Didn’t Say
, it’s back to a compact time frame, as with my debut novel. Most of the action takes place within forty-eight hours, and most of it within the walls of one house in one neighborhood. I was attracted to the crucible effect this would create, especially with characters who are thrown together unwillingly. I chose the Heritage Hill neighborhood of Grand Rapids, Michigan, for the simple reason that I love it. It’s a beautiful, old, and interesting part of town. As with my first novel, this book features a mix of real and fictional landmarks. Heritage Hill is real, the schools mentioned in the book are not. The newspaper where Michael works is not a faithful reproduction of
The Grand Rapids Press,
which is why I called it the
Herald.
But the Meyer May House, the Sixth Street Park, Literary Life Bookstore, the “Castle” building which now holds a dentist’s office—all those places are real.
How did the title come about?
Credit goes to my editor, Lucia Macro. This phrase represents so much of what goes wrong for the characters. I think most people in a relationship can relate to this. Think of how many times you want to say something to your loved ones, and circumstances prevent you, or you stop yourself. Why? We fear the results of our words sometimes, but silence does damage, too. It turned out to be so poignant for me, because we happened to settle on this title as my beloved mother-in-law was dying of cancer. It’s only natural when we lose someone to think of all we didn’t say.
This novel, like your others, has a large cast. Who was the most challenging character to write?
Writing from the perspective of the children was a fun challenge, but by far the trickiest character was the ex-wife, Mallory. She’s the first true antagonist I’ve tackled, but I did my utmost not to turn her into a caricature of pure villainy. She is damaged, but I would not say she’s evil. It’s an interesting question that Michael wrestles with throughout their marriage, how much control she has over her own actions, and thus how much personal responsibility she bears. I also found the failed marriage between Mallory and Michael to have a life of its own as well, and it was a challenge to portray that relationship in a way that was understandable and relatable. Sometimes the story of a marriage isn’t easily understood, especially by those from the outside looking in, and I hoped to give the readers some insight into that story.
KRISTINA RIGGLE
lives and writes in Grand Rapids, Michigan, with her husband, two kids, and dog. She’s a freelance journalist, published short story writer, and coeditor for fiction at the e-zine
Literary Mama
. Her debut novel,
Real Life & Liars
, was named a Great Lakes, Great Reads selection by the Great Lakes Independent Booksellers Association.
The Life You’ve Imagined
was honored as an Indie Next Notable Book.
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A deep, heartfelt thank you to my family for putting up with writing-distracted me, book-tour-traveling me, book-launch-stressed-out me, and still loving me as much as ever.
Thank you to the people at HarperCollins who lovingly tended my work from manuscript to finished book, then got those books into readers’ hands: Esi Sogah; Stephanie Selah; Teresa Brady; my amazing editor, Lucia Macro; and more people than I know by name. It sure doesn’t happen by accident or magic, and I’m grateful to have you on my side.
Much gratitude to the supportive and smart women from Nelson Literary Agency: Kristin Nelson, Lindsay Mergens, Sara Megibow, and Anita Mumm.
As ever, I’m indebted to Eliza Graham for her thoughtful and considerate reading of early drafts.
I received invaluable research assistance from Det. Pete Kemme of the Grand Rapids Police Department, Chris Byron of the Grand Rapids Public Library, and Thomas H. Logan, author of
Almost Lost: Building and Preserving Heritage Hill.
I also consulted writings by Robert O. Friedel, M.D., and Richard Moskowitz, M.D., and the Web site of the National Institute of Mental Health.
To the readers, booksellers, book clubs, librarians, bloggers, and journalists who have read, written about, and recommended my work: I’m humbled and grateful.
The Life You’ve Imagined
Real Life & Liars
Praise for
Kristina Riggle and
Real Life & Liars
“With ease and grace, Riggle walks the fine line between sentimentality and comedy, and she has a sure hand in creating fun, quirky characters.”
—
Publishers Weekly
“
Real Life & Liars,
Kristina Riggle’s sumptuous and rich debut novel, examines the complications that arise in family and marriage, love and heartbreak. With lush writing and nuanced, relatable characters, this book is a must-read for anyone who has ever been both grateful and driven mad by the people they love most: their family.”
—Allison Winn Scotch,
author of the
New York Times
bestselling
Time of My Life
“Written with grace, passion, and insight,
Real Life & Liars
is a deeply felt novel that draws a vivid portrait of a family in transition, and examines the very real fear of leaving behind all you hold dear.”
—Maggie Dana, author of
Beachcombing
“In Kristina Riggle’s moving debut,
Real Life & Liars,
she poignantly portrays the inner workings of a family faced by crisis. Funny, sad, and utterly believable, these are characters that seem like old friends.”
—Elizabeth Letts, author of
Family Planning
The Life You’ve Imagined
“
The Life You’ve Imagined
is a richly woven story laced with unforgettable characters. Cami, Maeve, Anna, and Amy will snag your heart as they explore the sometimes-wide chasm between hope and reality. A beautiful book.”
—Therese Walsh, author of
The Last Will of Moira Leahy
“In this engaging, companionable novel about family, expectations, and adversities overcome, Kristina Riggle performs the admirable feat of giving us characters who are somehow both familiar and wonderfully original. Unpredictable, touching, and true, The
Life You’ve Imagined
is a stand-out story; I devoured it and wanted more.”
—Therese Fowler, author of
Reunion
“Backed by Riggle’s trademark unflinching honesty and imbued with heart and hope,
The Life You’ve Imagined
is a terrific novel about love and loss, letting go and holding on. A book to share with family and friends—I loved it.”
—Melissa Senate, author of
The Secret of Joy
COVER DESIGN BY MUMTAZ MUSTAFA
COVER PHOTOGRAPH BY
ANNA MOLANDER / GETTY IMAGES
This book is a work of fiction. The characters, incidents, and dialogue are drawn from the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
THINGS WE DIDN’T SAY.
Copyright © 2011 by Kristina Ringstrom. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
FIRST EDITION
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Riggle, Kristina.
Things we didn’t say / by Kristina Riggle.—1
st
ed.
p. cm.
ISBN 978-0-06-200304-1