“
He’s going to hurt her,”
I say, choosing to omit the fact that he’s already hurt her. Ruby
nods and stands from her place at the table. I stand up and look
down at her.
“
He’s going to break her
heart and she’s going to break his. Nothing worth having ever comes
without a price,” she says and walks back to the counter to prepare
her chicken.
“
Next time, why don’t you
just say you think it’s gonna work out?” I ask. She looks over her
shoulder, her lips twisting up at the corners.
“
Because you needed to
know that it’s going to work out for you, too. Nic’s running
scared, but one day you’ll tire her out and she’ll stop
running.”
I stare at her incredulously and throw
my hands in the air. “I don’t even know how you know this
shit.”
She turns around and gives me a soft
smile and says, “If you’d been listening, you wouldn’t have to ask
me that. The message, Joshua, is that even though Nic doesn’t know
it right now, she needs you. I see so much of myself in that girl.
She’s headstrong to a fault and prideful as all hell. Whatever’s
going on between you two that’s got you sportin’ that sour puss
will pass, and you’ll see to it because you need her, too. Same way
Ryan needs Alex, and I need Jim.”
“
No really, how high are
you?” I ask. She smiles wide and shrugs.
“
You’re the one who came
to me looking for relationship advice,” she says. Damned if I can
argue with her.
I’m trying like hell to make it work
with Nic, but she’s not going easy on me. The night after we had
our slow fuck, I got a call that Mancuso’s boys were on their way.
That was when Ruby had been forced to tell Alex the truth, and
shit’s been upside down ever since. I’ve barely had five minutes
alone with Nic in the past week, and it’s pissing me off. The only
time I see her is when I crawl into bed beside her and the few
times we’ve fucked since last week. Otherwise, she’s fucking
ignoring me, and just lying beside her isn’t enough. I tried to get
her to come to the house so I’d know where she was, but she isn’t
answering my calls or returning any of the text messages or voice
mail messages I’ve left for her. Two days ago, her voice mail box
filled up, and I’ve been reduced to calling and texting her, not
that she’s responding, and yesterday I had to have one of the
prospects hunt her brother down to get his number so I can at least
find out what she’s doing through him. Ever since our little tiff a
couple of weeks ago, he’s been a compliant soul. I haven’t been
around, but according to Fish, who’s been keeping an eye on the
shop and clubhouse, Jeremy’s been doing good at his assigned task.
As much as I wanted to pound his face into the pavement, I decided
the best way to teach him to be a man is to put him to work like a
man. He’s spent every day taking orders from Fish and cleaning up
the shop like I told him to. Once this shit with Princess settles,
I’m going to have him help me fix Nic’s car up.
The sun isn’t really shining outside as
much as it is just slightly overcast and streaming in a few spots
from breaks in the clouds overhead. Fucking Mendocino summer. It’s
never really all that hot here, but a day like today I wish it
were. I’m sick of standing in cool winds and light rains in fucking
July of all times. I pull my sun glasses on because I’m bound and
fucking determined to find a sunny spot to stand in, and walk out
the back to my post. It’s about time I relieve Bear anyway. By the
back shed of the house, Bear stands with his semi-automatic assault
rifle. He paces down the property line about a hundred yards then
back toward the house. He catches sight of me before I get too
close, and thank the fuck for it, too. He’s more of a shoot first
and ask questions later kind of guy.
“
Go blow a load, I got
this,” I say to Bear. He nods, grabs his dick, and sticks his
tongue out.
“
No matter how many times
you ask, I am not going to suck your dick. So save yourself the
trouble and just stop asking. You’re embarrassing yourself!” I
shout as he disappears around the shed. I lift the strap to my own
semi-automatic rifle over my head and make sure it’s positioned
correctly. With one hand under the long barrel and the other near
the trigger, I survey the landscape. The neighbors on this side of
the property live at the bottom of a sloping hill and are a good
quarter of a mile away, so even if they look up they’re unlikely to
see the firepower. Nothing much is going on over there. A few
lights are on inside the house, and two cars are parked out front.
Nobody’s outside from what I can tell, so I move on. Walking the
same path that Bear just did, I focus on the task at hand and try
to move past all that shit Ruby said. I’m pretty sure she was half
drunk when she was talking about Trigger. That bastard was never
cute.
“
Grip it tighter. Act like
it’s my dick,” Trigger says. I pause for a moment and abandon my
post to see what’s going on. With any luck, he’ll be talking to
Diesel or Chief and not Princess. Crossing the field, glancing back
at the property line every few feet, I reach a line of redwood
trees and stop, turn around, and check one more time before
continuing on toward Trigger’s voice. Now, on the other side of the
trees, I can see Trigger as he stands behind Princess. His arms are
lifted in front of him, and he’s got Princess doing the same. She’s
got a gun in her hands and his cover hers.
He’s teaching her to shoot. Trigger
doesn’t teach anyone anything. He won’t even teach a bitch to suck
his dick the way he likes it. If she doesn’t get it right on her
own, he doesn’t give her another chance. He’s a picky fucker, and,
yet, still a total slut.
“
Stop being crude,”
Princess says and looks back at him. He cranes his neck down to
look at her and gives her a peck on her forehead.
“
Do you even know who
you’re talking to?” he says and slowly drags his hands up her arms
and places them on her hips. “This is important. Quit fucking
around. Now, fire.”
She pulls the trigger, and a blank
fires out at the barn in front of them. She jumps and nearly drops
the gun. Trigger grabs it as she spins around and buries her face
in his chest. The hand with the gun rests on her hips, and the
other he uses to rub her back in a jerky motion. He’s being
comforting and kind, but, from the looks of it, it’s killing him
slowly to be this patient. The dude’s never been very good with
being nice to people when his patience has run out. He leans down
and kisses her on top of her head then pulls back.
“
Again,” he says. She
starts to whine, but he shakes his head. “Shut up and
shoot.”
Deciding I’ve seen enough, I turn and
walk back to my place at the fence. Maybe in some fucked up way,
Ruby’s right. Maybe Trigger needs this. The guy I just saw isn’t
the guy I know. The guys I know is a real prick. He doesn’t give
hugs and kiss foreheads, and he doesn’t teach a chick to do
anything. But he’s clearly trying even if it is making him nuts and
about to lose his temper—because it doesn’t take much. Everything
Ruby said rambles around in my head. She made Jim suffer for months
before she finally hooked up with him, and when she finally gave
in, she demanded something from him. She needed him to protect her
kids, and he gave her that. He needed a mother for his son, and she
gave him that, though a lot of good that did—the boy’s still fucked
up. They each had something the other needed, and they work.
They’ve been working for years now. It’s a sight to see. The way
Ruby and Jim move around one another, it’s like they synchronize
it. It doesn’t matter what the other is doing, they just kind of
circle each other. As much as Ruby loves him, there’s no way he
doesn’t love her more. The way he came to the club those months
ago, asking us to help him fulfill a promise he had no right to
make back before he was even president. That’s love.
And fuck if I don’t want that shit for
myself.
I pull my cell out of my pocket, find
Jeremy in my contacts, and hit the call button. It rings four times
before voice mail picks up. “You got Jeremy,” the message says, and
then it beeps.
“
Have your sister call me
back or I’m going to assume you didn’t give her the message,” I say
and then hit the end button and shove the phone back into my
pocket. Walking the line, I wait another fifteen minutes or so. My
brain can’t let go of everything that’s going on, and if I don’t
figure out how to stop it, I’m pretty fucking sure I’m going to go
insane. This much thought can’t be that fucking healthy, but it’s
like I’m on a goddamn rodent wheel and can’t get off. If I’m being
honest with myself, which I hate to be, I’m just fucking tired of
all the faceless bitches and the getting to know you phase and then
the breaking up phase, and then that awkward phase at the end where
she doesn’t get it. It’s insufferable.
I’ve known Nic a damn long time, and
even when she ignores me—as she does so often—I’ve always known it
was her. And she’s always been hot and mouthy, and even though she
acts like she wants nothing to do with me most of the time, I’ve
never forgotten the girl who used to always talk about traveling
all over the country on the back of a Harley. Thinking about her is
making me crazy to a point that’s got to be unhealthy.
Eventually, I give in and try Nic
again, but she doesn’t answer, so I try Jeremy again. He doesn’t
answer either, so the second message I leave on his voice mail
isn’t quite as friendly. I threaten to hunt his ass down and beat
the shit out of him until he has to piss in a bag for the next
month. I can’t leave, but he doesn’t know that. It’s a few minutes
later when he calls me back and apologizes profusely before telling
me what I really don’t want to fucking hear, but have to
anyway.
“
She said she’s not going
to call you back and that you can talk to her at 3am when you crawl
in bed like you normally do,” he says. His voice trails up at the
end like he’s expecting me to flip out. He’s not far off
base.
“
Fuck,” I say.
“
Sorry, dude. She’s been
in a foul-ass mood lately,” he grumbles.
“
What did you just call
me?”
“
Sir,” he stutters.
“Sorry, Sir.” I bite back the laugh that’s rumbling in my chest. He
doesn’t know it yet, but I’m treating him like a prospect. Nic
would flip her shit if she knew, but when I sent word via a
hang-around to Butch about making Nic my Old Lady, I also made
mention of having Jeremy prospect for us. I should hear back about
that any day. Being around the club could be good for the kid, and
from what she’s told me about his grades and all, it’s not like
he’s got an Ivy League future.
“
You making her week
worse?” I ask him.
“
No Sir,” he says. “I’ve
been to class every day on time and I haven’t given her attitude
even though she’s given it to me.”
“
Good. If I hear
otherwise, it won’t be pretty,” I say.
“
I understand, Sir,” he
says. I hang up and continue to keep an eye on everything. The sun
started setting a while ago, and now it’s moving into total
darkness. We’re keeping the flood lights off so they aren’t
triggered by movement. Minutes pass and my cell rings. Pulling it
out of my pocket, I let a smile cover my entire face at the name on
the screen: NIC.
A loud bang sounds from the back of the
property. Instinctively, I shove the ringing phone back in my
pocket, right my semi-automatic rifle, and follow the sound.
There’s at least five wild shots fired from the back tree line. I
pick up the pace, scanning the neighboring property and the tree
line to my left, but there’s nothing out there that I can see. My
heart jumps in my chest. After all this waiting, shit’s finally
going down.
Someone flips the flood lights on, and
the entire field is illuminated. I blink at the sudden intrusion on
my corneas then resume my position and pick up the pace now that I
can see everything clearly. My brothers are already at the tree
line checking it out. Grady, Bear, and Diesel come out with their
hands in the air, shaking their heads. To my left, I spot Trigger,
who freezes in place, curses, and then runs back to the house at
full speed. I follow behind him, darting around trees and hopping
over fallen branches and logs that are strewn about the field. PJ
appears behind Trigger and runs beside him. I trail behind the two,
not even trying to get in either of their way. They’re both so
attached to Princess, I’d probably be missing an arm if I tried it.
I force myself not to even think about anything else that could be
going on. My heart sounds like it’s running a marathon in my chest,
and my eyes are wide and alert. I have my rifle at the
ready.
Running into the house behind Ryan and
PJ, everything turns into fucking chaos. Princess is gone. My
temper flares, and my muscles tense at the sight before me.
Princess’s room is a goddamn disaster. She barely got it decorated,
and now it’s all fucked up. From outside, men are screaming and
shouting at one another. I can hear Trigger from the front yard,
through the open sliding glass door. He’s barking orders at anyone
who will listen. Ruby stumbles into the room with a bloody hand on
her head and a clean one over her mouth. She shakes her head as
tears pool in her eyes.
“
They took her,” she wails
loudly. My heart breaks for her. She barely got Princess a few
months ago and now this shit happens. I usher her over and check
out her wounds. She’s got a bump on her head and a cut at her
hairline, but that’s it. Collapsing against my chest, Ruby screams
so loud I worry my eardrums might not recover. A painful sob and
then a violent scream. She pulls at my leather cut and sinks to the
floor. I crouch down beside her, not letting go as she loses her
shit.