Three to Tango (7 page)

She marched over and gave Ava a hug. “Now then. What are you still doing here? Hm? Do you need something? A little piece of this? Because between you and me, sweetie, it’s okay to let yourself love them. Even though they didn’t deserve it, or even if they did.” She shrugged. “This is for you.”

Ava opened her mouth and then closed it when tears loomed so close if she’d uttered a single sound, her control would crumble and she’d lose her shit.

So she nodded and Maryellen took her hand, squeezing it.

In the end, it had been a stack of pictures she’d found out in the sleeping porch Ava had claimed as a small space of her own growing up. She’d forgotten the hidey-hole until she’d stood in the doorway.

“I think we need some ice cream. What do you think, Ava?”

Maryellen had simply taken over. Part of her wanted to rebel against it, against that fierce sort of motherhood she’d put on and dared anyone to get in her way. But the rest of her, most of her, had relished simply being taken care of.

“You ready to go?” Maryellen had guided her out of the memories of that cramped little porch she’d tried to dress up with magazine pages and whatever else she could find to spruce it up. She’d taken her books with her to Los Angeles.

“I guess I took it all with me when I left.”

“Who you are surely is a lot about this house, Ava.” Maryellen drew her from the house. The statement panicked her.

“Lord above, I hope not.” She shuddered, looking around the neighborhood.

“Of course that’s so. You’re the kind of person who handles her own business. Who doesn’t waste time on blaming your messed-up childhood for her mistakes so she can keep on making them. You’re strong and this”—Maryellen indicated the house and the surroundings—“ is why.”

Maryellen smiled in that way she had, seeing right to the heart of a person. She brushed a smudge from Ava’s chin. “You’re exceptional, Ava. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise because I know the truth.”

Afraid of the rest of the truth, she stepped back, trying to push it all from her mind. “I have to drop a check at her landlord’s.”

“Why don’t you let me do that? Hm?”

“Stop being so nice to me for a minute or you’re gonna make me cry. I promised myself when the Greyhound bus got to the state line that I’d never let them make me cry again.
I will not cry.
”

Maryellen’s eyes filled with tears and Ava scurried past her. “He just lives two doors down. I’ll be right back.”

His house was kept up better than the others. His car nicer, lawn mowed. But he’d always kept three big, scary dogs. She hated those dogs, hated seeing how mean he’d been to them, how mean he’d made them.

The one currently growling at her from the other side of a flimsy looking fence was probably the grandchild of some of the dogs who’d growled at her each time she brought the rent here.

He opened shortly after she knocked, looking her up and down. “Lookie here, it’s The Rand Girl, all grown up. Yer momma used to be pretty like you.” He laughed in his wheezy way, and she itched to be gone.

“I brought you the back rent for Marlene Rand’s place. Do whatever you want with the contents.” She thrust the envelope his way and stepped back.

“I’m sorry for your loss. Marlene wasn’t no mother-of-the-year material, I know that. But she did love you. She talked about you sometimes. Show pictures of your place out in Los Angeles.”

If she pressed the heel of her hand against her chest hard enough, maybe she’d make it through without losing her shit.

“I …” She nodded briskly and turned, nearly stumbling in her rush to get away.

“Come on, sweetheart.” Maryellen guided her to her rental car. “Let’s go get us some ice cream and a big box of tissues.”

Seven

“
L
et it go.” Angelo tossed the paper he’d been pretending to read down onto the table on Luca’s back deck. “She needs to be alone. Your momma’s gonna run over there at some point, you know she will.”

“Why not us, Angelo? Huh? Why after all we’ve shared does she still hide shit from us?”

He sighed. “Luca, you have no idea what it’s like. Growing up poor is one thing, but the way she did? She’s ashamed of it.”

“But how can we show her it’s not something for her to be ashamed of, especially with us, if we let her hide it?”

“You think you’re going to fix her? Is that it? Luca riding in on his white steed to steal her away from her past? Help her pretend her mother wasn’t a pill-popping, alcoholic whore who turned tricks for OxyContin? Hmm? Your love gonna save her from the fact that her father used to beat the shit out of her when he got back from one of his benders down in Riverton, where he gambled away his entire paycheck and left them unable to buy food? You don’t know shit about it. She’s trying to shield you from that. Let her, for fuck’s sake.”

If Luca hadn’t known all of Angelo’s little side steps, he’d have been riled by the tone. Instead, he waved it away. “She’s better than that. Why shouldn’t she be able to forget it? Not that it didn’t shape her, I get that, I’m not an idiot. She’s clearly not that girl anymore. Is it so bad I want to help her get around something that tries to draw her back to that place? Why shouldn’t I want to give her a normal life?”

“She’s not without flaws, Luca. She’s fucked up like everyone else in the world. You can’t put her on a pedestal like this.”

“Fuck you. Why do you treat me like I’m stupid and lovesick?”

“Because you
are
lovesick!”

“I love her. I’m not lovesick.” Luca shook his head and walked back into the house.

Angelo followed. “It’s been a week, Luca. You’re in love after not quite seven days?”

“I am really sick and tired of people treating me like I’m naïve or stupid. I fell in love with Ava a long time ago. Probably a few weeks after the first time I kissed her. She was gone a few months later and I moved on. But I never just turned my love for her off.”

“We need to have a long conversation about how you envision this going from here.”

“Aren’t we doing that right now? You don’t want her? Really? Because I’m too old to lie to myself especially when hey,
I want her
. I’ve been with her and then without her for a really long time. Now she’s here and I sure as hell don’t want to go back to being without her again.”

Angelo took a breath and weighed his words carefully. “It’s not that I don’t want her. It’s just not simple, and you know it.”

“Fuck simple. What has simple got you, huh?” Luca raised a brow in question. “Your longest relationships are less than six months. You live in a great big house with a lot of empty rooms. What’s filling your life right now?”

“Where the hell do you see me fitting into this fairy tale you’re building? Hm?”

“What do you mean? You think I’d try to push you out or something? Are you so blind you don’t know how I feel about you, too?”

In three steps Angelo was nose to nose with him, breathing hard.

“Don’t be a tease, Luca.”

“I’m not teasing. You’re the one who never takes a male date to your black-tie events.”

“I don’t date men. I’ve fucked a few. You included.”

“Always trying to be so casual. Sure, you fuck around a lot, but they don’t stay over and your life, like your house, is a big, empty space you can’t seem to fill. What is it? You like being alone so much? Does it feed your guilt appropriately for getting away from that shithole you grew up in?”

Angelo’s mouth twisted, but he didn’t deny it. Couldn’t, Luca knew. His life was just as empty, only at least he could fucking admit it.

“My big giant house is just fine, fuck you very much. I do just fine, and the last thing I need is complicated stuff like a girlfriend
and
a boyfriend.” Angelo’s words were meant to be cutting.

“You trying to piss me off so I’ll back off? Hm? Too late, I’m already pissed, and it has nothing to do with that total bullshit you just spewed.”

“Bullshit? Do you know how much money I’m able to sock away for college for my nieces and nephews because of the television work I do? You see many guys with boyfriends getting that sort of work? Oh, I know, let’s complicate it even further with a woman. I can tell
Us Weekly
that I’m
just like us
because I have one of each.”

“You think we need to take out a billboard for that? I’m not asking you to wear an ‘I Love Luca When He Sucks My Cock’ T-shirt, you know. It’s not like Petal is New York City or anything. I’m not taking out ads in the paper to announce our threesome. Clearly we’ll all have to be circumspect in our behavior.”

“You’re fooling yourself, Luca. Gunning for getting your heart broken. This can’t work.”

Angelo looked miserable. Luca understood it, felt it often enough. But he knew one thing more than anything else—if he didn’t at least try, he’d be miserable anyway.

“You do what you need to, but I am standing here in the open telling you I am in love with Ava and I’m going to ask her to work things out, try to have a relationship of some kind. I’m telling
you
I love you and I want you to be part of this discussion with her.”

Angelo was on him without warning, his mouth sealed over Luca’s, stealing his breath. “I shouldn’t want either of you, damn it.”

Luca grabbed Angelo’s cock through the front of his jeans. “But you do. You drag yourself over here every six months or so and drink too much before you’ll allow yourself to want me. Three times in ten years you’ve given yourself permission to touch me. This last week has been, well fuck you, it’s been really good with both of you, with the three of us. I won’t pretend I don’t want that. How will it be with you if she stays with me? Will you pretend you don’t want her, too? Hm? Because I
will
love her. I
will
touch her and fuck her and we will have a life, and if you think you can deny yourself that except for a taste every few years, you’re lying to us both.”

Angelo wanted to shove him back almost as much as he wanted to haul him closer. He settled for half of both, shoving Luca back against the nearby wall so hard the picture hanging there swayed a little. He followed with his body, pressing himself against Luca, arching and rolling his hips.

The sweet agony of cock against cock, even with denim in the way, shocked its way up his spine.

The want, the craving for not just Luca, but for Ava and what they all had together, pooled in his gut. His hands ably ripped the front of Luca’s jeans open, grabbing his cock. Luca groaned, jutting lean hips forward.

“That’s right, you wanted this and you’re going to get it.” Angelo’s words seeped from his clenched jaw.

“So give it to me and stop talking about it already.”

With a strangled laugh, Angelo hauled Luca over toward a nearby couch where they fell, still laughing as clothes were ripped off enough so that skin finally met skin.

That’s when Ava came in, and the beauty of it slapped at her, along with the sinking sensation that she wasn’t necessary here at all. That she’d been fooling herself to think it was about the three of them. She’d simply been a way for the two of them to be together.

Angelo looked up then, catching sight of her. His smile stayed until he must have noted her expression.

“Ava?” He stood, the fly of his jeans giving her a V-shaped flash of hard, flat belly and the shock of his well-trimmed pubic hair at the very bottom.

“Sorry. I …” She took a step back, thinking about the best way to get the fuck up out of there and get to the airport.

“Sorry for what?” Angelo moved to her with purpose, even as she eyed the back door she’d just come through. He was so strong there, so big and masculine, concern on his handsome face. She couldn’t bear to look at him.

She wanted to touch him, would have just hours before. But now it felt as if everything had changed. “Interrupting. I didn’t knock. Or ring the bell. Or anything.”

Luca approached, disheveled and so beautiful she paused to just look at him for a moment. It had to last her after all, last her until, well, forever, she guessed.

“Why would you? Is something wrong?” Angelo pulled her into a hug and growled until she relaxed.

“It’s just been a day I guess. I need to get packed.” She tried to pull away from Angelo, but he held on tight.

Luca got in her face, standing at Angelo’s shoulder. “Just like that? You come back here wearing a stranger’s expression and you’re going to pack and leave? What. The. Fuck. Happened?”

“Nothing!” She couldn’t look at them without crying, so she focused on her feet, realizing the toes of her sneakers were dirty. “It’s just time for me to go back home.”

“You’re looking at the floor. I don’t think I’ve seen you do that the entire time you’ve been back. Did someone hurt you, Ava?” Angelo shook her to get her attention. “Did someone do or say something when you went to Marlene’s?”

“Your eyes are red, baby, I can see you’ve been crying. Why would you be ashamed of that? You don’t have to be so tough, you know.” Luca’s concern tore at her.

“You’re scaring me, Ava.” Angelo let go of one of her arms to tip her chin. When her gaze met his, she nearly lost it again. “Tell me what it is so I can fix it.” There was so much emotion in his voice it scared her.

“Just let me go. I’ll get out of the way and you two can … get back to everything. You’ve been great and all, entertaining me this last week.” She felt stupid. Humiliated that she’d entertained the idea of trying to make this work out in some sense. She should have known better.

“Entertaining you?” Luca’s fear now took a back seat to his anger. “Is that what this has been for you? You drop in and fuck me for a few days and now you’re leaving? Again?”

“You started it! I was staying in a hotel. I was going to leave on Wednesday night. You touched me first, you fucked me first.” She hadn’t meant to scream it, hadn’t intended that thread of pain to sound so, so loudly, but it was there nonetheless.

Angelo angled himself between the two of them. “Stop this. Ava, clearly something is wrong. You were not like this earlier today, and I get that seeing the house was probably a shock and all, but you’re not making any sense. What is this bullshit about letting us get back to everything? About us entertaining you for a week?”

She couldn’t think straight with them so close. “Damn it, let me go!”

He did, but his gaze remained locked on her. “Don’t even think about leaving this room before we get this all straightened out.”

“You’re not the boss of me, for fuck’s sake!”

“You clearly need a boss, Ava. Don’t think I didn’t feel your cunt ripple around my cock each time I was exactly the boss of you. You’re acting like a stranger. Now, before I get in my car and go out looking for someone’s ass to beat in retaliation for whatever was done to you, why don’t you tell us yourself.”

“I
am
a stranger. Don’t you get that? You two have always had each other. But I haven’t been here. I’ve been just fine for the last decade. I can manage my own life. I have a good life. A good job. I don’t have to worry about whether or not I can afford milk or bread. I don’t need anyone or anything. I told you, it’s just been a long day. No one hurt me. I need to leave now.” She moved toward the stairs, and Angelo didn’t stop her. Her heart broke a little more, but she managed to hold it together as she jogged up to the master bedroom as fast as she could.

Angelo stopped Luca as he rushed past. “No. Wait a second.”

“Why? She’s clearly upset at what happened today and is afraid to share. Didn’t you just hear me tell you, not even thirty minutes ago, that I wanted to make a go of things with her? I love her, Angelo. I don’t want to be without her ever again.”

“She’s not upset about something that happened at the house. She wouldn’t look at us, Luca. We’re the ones who’ve upset her.”

“What? Why would you think that? Things were just fine earlier today. Yes, I was pissed and hurt that she wanted to hare off on her own, but when she left to go to her mother’s place, things were better between us. The hugs, the kisses and the promises to be back by supper, those were real.”

“I know. If I didn’t know how all right she was about you and me being together, I’d think it was that. She seemed so stricken when I looked up at her.”

Luca eyed him suspiciously. “She gets off on watching us together. I know she does. When you fucked me, after her, on your pool table, she’s the one who brought the lube. She’s the one who laid out right in front of us and fingered herself while she watched. She’s not jealous. She knows how we feel about her. Anyway, I thought you weren’t interested in trying to work anything out.”

Angelo scrubbed his face with his hands. He didn’t want to be interested. It would be a public relations nightmare if word got out he not only had two partners, but that one of them was male. He could lose those extremely lucrative television jobs. Most likely his clients at the firm wouldn’t care as long as he kept making them money.

He wanted to get in his car and go home.

Luca watched him without speaking.

“I shouldn’t.” But he couldn’t imagine how it would feel to lose her again. Even if he and Luca tried to have a relationship on their own, there’d be a space where she was supposed to be. And, he admitted to himself, he loved her. She was integral to him.

“But?”

How had it come to this? He and Ava were the hard ones. The ones who tried to protect Luca. And yet it was Luca who stood so straight and tall, so sure of his path ahead. Luca who was the only one not running and hiding from something.

“Let’s go up there and get it out of her.”

Luca’s anger dropped away, replaced by his smile, and Angelo’s heart turned over in his chest.