She stood up and briskly walked back to the parking lot. Maybe they found change sexy, a turn-on. But it was certainly not economical, and Arthur was dead set against renting. God, one time her mother had wanted to rent folding chairs when they were having a camp reunion for Wesley and Arthur had blown up.
“
Renting furniture is pissing money away. Skip the middleman and burn my cash right now instead. Save time.
”
The campers had sat on the floor to eat their sandwiches. Her mother tried to make it seem on purpose, called it an
“
indoor picnic.
”
Now look at the hypocrite. Unless, maybe the woman was paying for this, and Arthur just happened to visit during sofa-shifts.
The movers wheeled their dolly back to the parking lot. The mistress was changing more than sofas. Out with a brass lamp with a black leather shade, out with a massive planked coffee table. In with ruffled shades
—
one of the men carried them while the other wheeled a round of glass, a gilded base, and two clear-glass lamps.
Penny seated herself in front of a piling and waited for more, watching a woman take a baby out of its car seat. She was glad she didn
’
t sit for anybody here. Too scary, and she didn
’
t have much confidence in water herself. She
’
d drown trying to stop a drowning.
Odd to choose a houseboat when you had a baby, but the whole colony was a little apart from normal. A mix of suits, artists, leftover hippies, and whoever was quietly growing cymbidiums at the end of the dock. Kids at school said drugs were run in the waters that filled the spaces between Sausalito, Tiburon, and Mill Valley.
The men loaded the dolly with a gold-and-white-painted headboard and night table, plus two gilded, pouffy-shaded lamps. And they took out a large boxed set she couldn
’
t identify until one of them called to the other, who was still in the truck,
“
Don
’
t forget the canopy. I have the rest of the four-poster.
”
She might vomit, imagining Arthur naked below the canopy. Why were they switching beds? Had they already worn one out? How long had this setup been going on?
The men wheeled an empty dolly back and got into the truck. Penny listened to the warning beeps as it backed out of its space. Something nagged at her, something separate from the things she already knew about, a kind of
“
What
’
s wrong with this picture?
”
sense. She thought back, tried to think this through, but her mind skipped and wandered.
She decided to wait for Arthur in the parking lot. It was more comfortable, with the piling as a backrest, and it was his only way out
—
unless he rowed off, which he wouldn
’
t. She rested her head on her knees as she again tried to figure out what the new thing was that bothered her about the moving people, and felt the shadow rather than saw anyone. Her heart rate doubled even before she lifted her head. She hadn
’
t seen him
—
he
’
d seen her.
But it wasn
’
t Arthur looming above her.
“
Luke!
”
she said.
“
What are you doing here?
”
She scrambled to her feet.
“
A better question would be what you
’
re doing here. Or, more precisely, what is my car doing here?
”
His voice had a whole new sound, as if he
’
d wrapped a worn-out blanket of calm over spikes and crags
“
You were asleep and this was important. I thought
—”
“
It
’
s two in the afternoon!
”
He was furious. No mistaking it now.
“
I
…
didn
’
t realize. I was watching. Luke, men came and
—”
“
And stop calling me that.
”
“
That
’
s who you are to me. That
’
s who you were when I met you.
”
“
No, I was Stephen, the guy with the weird car, remember? It wasn
’
t until you invited yourself to one of our
—”
“
You told me to come. You did!
”
He shrugged.
“
Whatever. I didn
’
t think it mattered, the Lucan the Steward business, but I changed my mind. It
’
s
—
it
’
s a symptom. You never want to live in the twentieth century. You want to live in The Principality of the Mists all the time. You love make-believe so much you
’
re ruining my life!
”
She stood and took off her cap in some instinctive humbling motion, then had no idea of what to do except brace herself. This felt like an earthquake, at least inside of her.
“
My name
’
s Stephen. And you had no right to take my car. You
’
re taking
everything
.
”
“
I
’
m sorry. Really, honestly. I didn
’
t think it
’
d matter. You were sound asleep, and we didn
’
t have any plans
—”
“
Maybe we didn
’
t, but I did! And that isn
’
t the point. You
’
ve got everything screwed-up. For starters, why the hell did you come here? What game are you playing?
”
“
Not a game, and you know. About my father.
”
“
So he
’
s having an affair. People do. My father has them nonstop. So they
’
re creeps, but it
’
s not the end of the world and it doesn
’
t have anything to do with you.
”
“
I told you
—
he treats us, all of us, like
—”
He brushed aside her words and walked away, then turned back.
“
You know what? I don
’
t give a shit about your father. My family
’
s fucked, too. Everybody
’
s is, but people don
’
t have to screw up their own lives because of it. When are you going to get your diploma? How are you going to get a decent job if you don
’
t? How are you going to live? Off me? That isn
’
t a plan, Penny. That isn
’
t what I meant.
”
He made everything wrong, turned it inside out and upside down. Maybe if he knew more about how weird things were at the houseboat, he
’
d see this wasn
’
t ordinary, this demanded attention.
“
Luke
—
Stephen, these men came and changed the furniture. Three times since I first came here. Three times that I saw, let alone when I wasn
’
t here. New sofa and bed and lamps and coffee table
—”
“
Get this straight
—
I don
’
t care. Everybody
’
s crazy their own way
—
what I care about is getting
my
shit together.
”
“
So do I, that
’
s why I came here.
”
“
Not this! You can
’
t straighten out your father.
”
“
Stepfather.
”
“
If he
’
s playing around, then he is. Tell your mother, let them work it through.
”
“
I did.
”
“
And?
”
“
She
…
didn
’
t believe me.
”
She didn
’
t want to say more. It bothered her even thinking about how her mother had reacted.
He shook his head and waved her entire family off.
“
I want to straighten
us
out. Now.
”
“
M-meaning what?
”
She could barely get the words out and when she did, they hurt her throat. Nothing was crooked or in need of work between them. He was her one ally on earth. She heard a high, thin scream like a dental drill in a faraway part of her skull, coming closer.
He seemed reluctant to speak, then he sighed.
“
Maybe if we talk it through, calmly, you
’
ll see. There
’
ve been misunderstandings right from the start, beginning with what you thought I was offering you, what you thought I meant. Nobody
’
s fault
—
just wires crossed.
”
He was kicking her out
—
turning back on the promises he
’
d made so she could get away from the screaming and hitting and lying and her father
’
s woman and other life.
He was a liar like everybody else. The high voice moved closer, through the center of her brain. It aimed for her face, found its target and plunged through her eyes like needles.
“
You
’
re making me leave, aren
’
t you?
”
He shifted his weight, looked uncomfortable. She was right, then, no matter what he
’
d say.
“
It isn
’
t that, not exactly. And not like today or anything. Listen, this is no place for a real talk. Can I have my car keys?
”
“
What are you going to say? Where am I going to go if you
—”
“
Don
’
t get hysterical. That
’
s one of your problems, acting as if everything
’
s so tragic, so dramatic.
”
“
This is! I can
’
t go home! He
’
s
—
They
’
re
—”
Her mind flooded with images of them, of him, of her mother pretending to be crippled so she could get money and get away from him, but she never would
—
not even if she collected a million dollars because she wanted that house, the furniture that all
“
went.
”
She suddenly realized what had been wrong at the houseboat.
“
They didn
’
t switch anything else,
”
she said out loud.
“
There couldn
’
t be a house where the rest of the stuff went with all those different sofas. But nothing else went. No chairs, even.
”
“
What are you, a reporter for
Architectural Digest
? Stop changing the subject. I
’
m not throwing you out and I
’
m not saying you have to go home. There must be other solutions. But for as long as you stay with us
—”
With us.
Not with him. With us. She didn
’
t matter to him, not in any special way.
“—
it
’
ll work better if you get a few things straight about, well, about how the place works. What
’
s appropriate and what isn
’
t.
”
Sounded like he was training a puppy. Like she
’
d been messing up, spoiling his life.
“
Like last night, about your necklace. Such a stupid racket, and you know, the rest of the house isn
’
t real excited to have a runaway there, so the least you could do is not
…
take over. And since you eventually agreed, couldn
’
t it have been sooner?
”
“
What do you mean, take over the house? I agreed not to do that?
”
“
No.
”
He sounded exhausted, as if he wanted her to know she was wearing him out and she hadn
’
t done anything, except borrow a car he wasn
’
t using.
“
I
’
m sorry about the car, really. I will never, ever, take it again. Unless you tell me to. Is that what you meant I had agreed to? Because I can
’
t remember, but I
’
ll never forget again. I thought I
’
d have it back before you woke up. I
’
m sorry.
”
“
I
’
m not talking about the car. I meant all that squabbling and hysteria before you agreed to make the phone call and notify the police. It could have been so easy
—
couldn
’
t we skip the fireworks from now on? Everybody would be happier.
”
They all were against her. She hated them. Hated him. Why should she do anything he wanted?
“
You
’
re immature. Compared to us, I mean. I
’
m not blaming you
—
it isn
’
t your fault. You
’
re normal, that
’
s all. You
’
re eighteen, haven
’
t been through much. But it makes life really
—”
“
I
’
ve been through plenty! I
’
m not a baby, the way you make me sound! I made a fuss because I understand more than you do. You
’
re all manipulating me, pushing me around. Whatever
’
s comfortable for all of you is what
’
s right, and screw me!
”
The scream drilling through her skull hit a well of tears and she blinked and brushed hard against her eyes.
“
I
’
m not doing any of it. I
’
m not calling the Marshalls. They
’
d never understand in a million years why I left and
—”