Time to Control (19 page)

"Wait, do you have to tell
them?
 
It's not a big deal, I'm fine
with what I make.
 
Besides, everyone
else has a spouse or family to support."

"That isn't an excuse, and you
know it, Schroeder.
 
And if they are
doing it to you, they may be doing it to others as well.
 
I have to tell them.
 
It's my job."

"But it'll piss Joseph off,
and I don't want to be fired for making waves."

Eddie put his arms around me, and
this time I let him.
 
"Sweetheart, is there something you're not telling me?
 
In one breath you're saying you love
your job, and in the next, you're afraid you're going to get fired.
 
If one of your girl friends said
something similar about her husband, you'd be on alert for domestic abuse.
 
Is your company an abusive company to
work for?"

"What?! No!"
 
I tried to pull away, but he wouldn't
let go.

He kissed the top of my head.
 
"Think about it, okay?
 
You shouldn't be living in fear for your
job.
 
Not when you do as much for
the company as you do.
 
Either they
are abusing employees in one way or another -- and discriminating is a form of
abuse -- or you're over-reacting to things, or... I don't know.
 
But I don't like you thinking that they
will fire you.
 
And with all the
problems you've had there, I certainly don't like you being happy there.
 
It makes me concerned about your
definition of happiness."
 
He
tilted my head up towards him with a fingertip under my chin.

I cast my eyes to the side, not
wanting to meet his gaze.
 
"Can
we just finish shopping so we can head home?"
 
I asked, tiredly.
 
He agreed, and the rest of the trip was
without argument.

Chapter Seven

Eddie wouldn't let me carry
anything in from the car, so I went in and changed.
 
"That TV wasn't on the dresser this
morning, was it?" I asked him, coming out of the bedroom in comfy
pj's.
 
"Wait, that certainly
wasn't here earlier."
 
I
pointed to the massive flat panel HDTV hanging on the wall, cables hanging down
from it.

"I went shopping.
 
Electronics is what I splurge on."

Oh yeah, I was mad at him.
 
I crossed my arms and got ready to yell
at him, but he embraced me again.
 
"I'm sorry.
 
I've been
saying that a lot, haven't I?”
 
I
nodded, and leaned my forehead against his chest.

“Do you want me to reschedule my
trip?” He asked softly.

“What? Why?”
 
My head was hurting again, and back to
feeling thick.

“Stay with you.
 
Take care of you.
 
Talk.
 
Learn more about how not to upset my
wife.”

I chuckled and smiled, hiding the
grin from him.
 
“I haven't been
Donna Reed myself.
 
We'll figure it
out.
 
It's just been a long two
weeks.”

“I still want to be with you,” he
said, rubbing the wedding ring.

“I want to be with you too.”
 
I tilted my head up and gave him a long
kiss.

He studied my eyes when we broke
apart.
 
“You look tired.
 
Why don't you turn on the tv and figure
out the remote.
 
I'll put groceries
away and make dinner.”
 
I was about
to object, and he pushed me towards the couch.
 
“Go.
 
Be a couch potato.”

“Hon, where did you put the Bath
and Body Works bag?” I called later that evening from the bedroom.

“Um, I might have left it in the
car.”
 
He rested against the door
frame, drying his hands on the dish towel he was using to dry the dishes with.
 
“Need me to go get it?”

“Unless you want me to go out like
this, yes,” I answered, my nude body striking a very revealing pose.

He swallowed and headed
outside.
 
When he returned I was
bending over the bathtub, checking the temperature of the running water.
 
“Wow, I am going to miss you.”
 
He leaned over my back, his hands going
for the soft breasts hanging down.
 
He massaged them gently, and I moaned and arched my back, pressing my
hips back into his.
 
I straightened,
and took advantage of our height difference and turned my neck so we could keep
the body contact and kiss at the same time.

“Mmm, you should go wash the
dishes,” I finally said, pushing him away and reaching in the bag for some
bubble bath.

“Dishes can wait.
 
I'd rather wash my wife.”
 
He gave my naked body a good-natured
leer, but I frowned.

“Eddie, my head hurts, my ribs
hurt, and I don't want to have another serious talk right now.
 
I just want to have a nice long soak and
read a book.”

“Whoa whoa whoa.
 
Who said anything about another talk?”
 
He looked to have another activity for
my mouth planned.

I closed my eyes and sighed.
 
Eddie reached around me and shut off the
water.
 
He checked to be sure the
side of the tub was dry, then sat down and pulled me onto his lap.
 
He caressed my breasts with one hand,
and swirled his fingertip around the nipples that hardened.
 
“Your body knows what it wants, even if
your brain doesn't.”

I wiggled from his grasp, and slid
in below the bubbles, gasping at the hot water.
 
“No.
 
We shouldn't.”

“Ooh, I'm up to a 'shouldn't' from
a 'no'.”

“Eddie, go get my book, will you?”
I asked, exasperated.

“No.”
 
He grinned at me, showing the crinkles
around his eyes that I normally loved.
 
Today, not so much, I thought, ignoring the heat that rose between my
legs.
 
He grabbed one of the new
washcloths from the stack on the lip of the tub, wet it, and started to wash an
arm.
 
I leaned my head back against
the bath pillow and closed my eyes, conflicting emotions running through my
body.
 
Eddie paused in the washing,
and got another washcloth and wet it, placing it folded over my eyes, soothing
the headache.
 
I fell a bit more in
love with him.

“I don't do condoms.”

“Huh?”

“No condoms.
 
No Pill.
 
No artificial birth control.
 
Therefore, no sex.”

“Sweetheart, we've been having
sex,” he said cautiously, moving to the other arm.

“Yes, but I haven't been
fertile.
 
Now I am, or at least
close enough.
 
So unless you want a
baby in nine months, and I think there's several very valid reasons to wait at
least six months before trying, no sex.”

“How do you know that you are?” He
was genuinely confused.

“The body prepares for it.
 
A woman can pay attention to the signs,
and know.
 
It helps that my cycle is
as regular as clockwork.
 
Right now
my body is saying 'virile man – he sire strong children – make baby
now!' and flooding me with hormones.
 
I want to jump your bones, and it's taking a lot of restraint to stay
away.”
 
The washing moved to my
torso, and I squirmed, torn between enjoying the pleasure and knowing I should
make him stop.

“Guys don't need to have sex every
day, you know,” he confided. “They only want to.
 
We can control ourselves if we need
to.”
 
I didn't think my nipples
could get harder, but the friction from the washcloth was stimulating them even
more.
 
“And not every action needs
to lead to sex.
 
If not having sex
when you're fertile is part of the deal, I can work with that.
 
But that doesn't mean we have to be
hands off.”
 
He tweaked a nipple,
and I sighed in relief when he moved to wash a foot.

“I--”

“You said you didn't want to
talk.
 
So don't talk, just
listen.
 
I love you, and I want to
spend the rest of my life with you.
 
I want to have little Schroeder's and Eddie's running around, but I may
insist on more feminine names for our girls.
 
I want lots of kids, and I know we
haven't talked about that yet.
 
However, I do agree that we need to wait.
 
We know we're married, but the world
does not.
 
One of the two of us will
be moving in a few months, and it'd be easier if you weren't massively pregnant
at the time.
 
Also,” he sighed, and
moved to the other leg.
 
“We have an
amazing opportunity with the ring.
 
We don't know how it works, or why.
 
I want to play with it more, and travel with you.
 
I don't want to do that with you
pregnant – I'd be too worried for the baby.
 
I also wouldn't want to leave our kids
at home while we go, even if it's just for a second.
 
We can discuss timing later, but until
then, I'm going to be as hand's on as I want to be.”

He brought the washcloth between my
legs to wash me, and his touch was anything but clinical.
 
I parted my legs involuntarily, giving
him better access.
 
I felt his lips
touch mine, and I relaxed into the kissing and ministrations.

“Lots of kids?” I asked when I was
functional again.

“Oh yeah.”

I grinned at him mischievously.
 
“I don't think I'll mind making babies
with you.
 
And I hear that can take
lots of practice.”

“Oh, yeah, lots of practice.”
 
He grinned back.

“I'm looking forward to it.”

Later that night in bed, Eddie
whispered into my ear while cuddling.
 
“Is there anything else you haven't told me?”

“Hmm?”
 
I woke up a bit to process his
request.
 
“Like what?”

“Like earlier.”

“Hon, I don't know.
 
My brain hurts to think.
 
It's been a roller coaster of a
day.
 
I just want to go to sleep.
 
We can talk tomorrow.”

“I'm leaving at seven,” he reminded
me.

“There's this new invention,” I
murmured, pulling the blanket up around my chin.
 
“It's called the telephone.”

He chuckled, and kissed me.
 
“Good night.”

“'nite, love.”

Half an hour later I threw off the
covers, rolled over, and punched him in the chest.
   
“I'm mad at you.”

“Bloody hell, woman!
 
What was that for?”
 
Now fully awake, Eddie sat up against
the headboard and hauled me close, holding my hands securely.

“I was sleeping, and you made me
wake up and think.
 
You want to talk
now, or what?”

He rubbed his chest, where I
punched him, ruefully.
 
“Well, I'm
certainly not falling back asleep any time soon.
 
What did you want to talk about?”

“I don't know, you're the one that
wanted to talk.
 
What else haven't
you told me?
 
You're going to
Chicago, when are you coming back?
 
Are you coming back here?
 
Or
do I have to come visit you?
 
Where
else do you have to go?
 
Are we
planning visits ahead of time, or spur of the moment?
 
When are we traveling next?
 
Are we going to Henry's, or visiting a
random time period?”

“All right, enough.”
 
He clamped a hand over my mouth.
 
“I'll be done in Chicago Friday, and was
going back to New York for the weekend.
 
I have a meeting Monday morning there, and believe it or not, I have
work to do in my own office.
 
I can
probably sneak out next Friday afternoon and hop a flight here, flying back
Sunday evening.
 
Unless you don't
want me to come.”

He released my mouth so I could
answer.
 
“Oh, I want you to come,” I
said, wiggling an arm free and finding his groin.
 
“I really want you to come.”
 
Eddie took a shuddering breath and
reclaimed my hand prisoner.

“You're more than welcome to come
visit me any time,” he continued.
 
“Can you do your job remotely?
 
Do you have any vacation time saved up?
 
Maybe you can come visit me in New York
for a week?”

“I didn't think about that.
 
I doubt they'd let me telecommute, but I
do have two weeks of vacation time still, even after the days off I've taken
recently.
 
You wouldn't mind if I
come visit?”
 
I craned my neck
around so I could look at him.

“I'd love for you to come,” he told
me, and kissed me until my toes curled.
 
“As for traveling,” he said when I was left panting, “I'd like to go
somewhen each time we're together.
 
We should make a list of where and when we want to go after we take care
of Henry.”

“Ooh, good idea.”

He nudged me.
 
“Making the lists would also help keep
us occupied when we can't be together.”

I sighed, and buried my head in his
bare chest.

“What, babe?”

“I don't want to be alone,” I admitted.
 
Eddie tightened his arms around me,
being cautious of my bruises.
 
“It's
been great being with you this past week, and having you come with me to my
parents.
 
But it's kept me from
thinking about the fact that I lost my apartment, I'm married in a
long-distance relationship, and I'm now living in an expensive town home that
I
 
still can't tell apart from the
neighbor's.
 
Not to mention the
problems at work.
 
I'm afraid that
you're going to leave, and everything is going to come crashing down on me.”

“I can quit tomorrow,” he said
quietly.

“No, I'm not asking you to do
that,” I protested.
 
“You like your
job.
 
Probably more than I like
mine.”

“Baby, something needs to give, and
I don't want it to be your sanity.”

“I don't think I'm going to lose
it, Eddie.
 
You've just.... you've
made me think a lot about myself.
 
And I'm not sure I've liked what I've found.”

He kissed my forehead.
 
“Well I'm sure I've liked what I've
found in you.
 
You're strong,
beautiful, confident, and I love being around you.
 
I love spending time with you, and
traveling with you.
 
I can't think
of anyone I'd like to experience the past with more.”
 
He moved his lips down to mine and
showed me his love.