To the Edge and Back [The Royal Wolves] (Siren Publishing Allure) (4 page)

Curling his lip up as he scented her fear, Janos straightened and pressed his hands to the bar. “There’s the door,” he said to her, nodding to the door behind her.

Turning, he picked up the slips and stuck them into the bag with the money he’d pulled before sticking everything into one of the safes under the in-office bar for later tallying. Standing up once more, he saw she was still there and cursed under his breath. “Why are you here?” he asked her as he turned to face her once more.

She had hocked her DVD player to get his money, but it wasn’t like she really used it anyway so it was no great loss. Tugging the twenty and ten out, she placed it on the arm of the couch and started to back out. “Thank you for the loan for the cab last night, and if you ever need anything”—she shrugged and smiled—“just call me.” She had to get out of there. He was so much larger than life, and just being around him was making her relive that silly daydream of hers.

Moving fast, he barred the door with his larger bulk and looked down at her before glancing to the cash on the arm of his sofa. Reaching out, he picked it up and, folding it, tried to hand it back. “Take it,” he said softly, staring down at her, his eyes catching every nuance of her expression. “Stubborn,” he murmured quietly, taking her hand and putting the cash into her palm before folding her fingers around it.

“It wasn’t a loan and it wasn’t a favor,” he told her. “It was to ensure you got home safely since you were too afraid to be near me for a moment longer than you had to be, just like now.” Inhaling, he shook his head. “I’d work on that if you intend on being in any of my bars again. With my clientele you’d be a fool to let them know you’re scared.”

She licked her lips and nodded. “I don’t know if you realize it or not, but I have only stepped foot in here now three times. I am not a clubber or the barfly type.” She didn’t have the time or the money, well, the money at least. “I’m not afraid of you.” Nope, she was more afraid of herself and the crazy dream that she had of him that day and then later that night and then again this morning. She was running from her dreams, and gods help her, this man was dream personified.

Lifting his brow at her words, he felt his lips curl in amusement, odd in and of itself since he really hadn’t felt any amusement for a very long time. Annoyed definitely, plenty of things pissed him off, but amused was something he hadn’t felt for years.

She tucked the money down the arm of the sofa. “I will leave. However, thank you for taking the time to see me.” Since meeting her he not only backed her into a corner by forcing her to take his money and intimidated the hell out of her, but now he was acting like a big bad Wolf ready to eat her up. She was a little more than flustered. Add to it the wet daydreams she had been having about that man, and it was enough to make her grind her teeth.

Reaching out, he picked the money up again and held it up between two fingers in front of her face. “Why won’t you just accept someone’s help?” he asked quietly. He knew from what the extremely chatty driver had told him that she had no family and that she was very much determined to make it on her own in the world.

Remaining as he was even when she made to move around him, which was impossible considering where he stood in the doorway, he shook his head. “Sometimes people do things out of the goodness of their hearts, Miss Tremayne. Why are you so determined to see the glass half-empty and assume they are all doing something for you to gain something in return?” Janos didn’t know where the question came from, but now it was of paramount importance that she answer it.

Since meeting her, all he had really were questions, and each answer he figured out or got from her brought up another ten questions. Not like him. He normally had zero interest in humans, but this little female was tugging at him in a way he never thought possible. Of course that might have had something to do with his very interesting dream the previous afternoon, late last night, and then again when he’d been daydreaming as the machine had tried to eat his totals for the previous night.

She thought about his question and sighed finally as she said, “I won’t and can’t accept other people’s help because everything comes with a price.” When he went to argue, she shook and bowed her head. “The driver had no right to discuss anything about me, especially when he has never even said more than boo to me. I know nothing about him and in the end he knows nothing about me. You said that I see the glass as half-empty and assume that people are only doing things for gain.” Rolling her eyes, she looked up at him. “You more than any other should know that humans as a whole only do things for gain.”

Grinding his teeth together, he took a steadying breath before he said anything. “I may have been a bit nosy with the driver, so don’t take it out on him. I can be persuasive when I want to be. As for the humans, I do know that they do anything and everything if it’s got some form of monetary compensation at the end. But I also know that not all humans are that way. Some are actually good of heart and soul.”

Leaning in slightly, he caught her eyes and held her gaze. “But you shouldn’t assume you know me by lumping me in with humans, Miss Tremayne, especially since the rumor mill should have at least told you…I’m not human.”

Letting his eyes change just enough that she’d get the point, he straightened. “If I said I did it to help, then that’s the truth. I don’t lie, unlike most of your species.” Stepping to the side, he held out the money to her. “Take it or leave it but don’t do it because you think I want something when I’ve never once indicated I did.” Putting the money into her hand once more, he moved away mainly to get away from the temptation of her.

She once more put the money on the couch and turned on her heel, moving out of the office as quickly as she could. He was a temptation. Even though he was a Wolf, he was still the man she had been lusting and dreaming after, and it was killing her to be close to him.

He watched her leave and shook his head. She’d gone and gotten herself freaked out. “Typical,” he sighed as he turned back to the machine and smacked it. Why did women have to be so damned stubborn? Grinning suddenly, he shook his head. That probably was the question of the ages right there.

Out the door and on fleet feet she raced for the bus stop. She was not one of the people he lumped her with. She didn’t do anything and everything for money. Sure, she worked a job for money, but she didn’t ever, ever step on or harm anyone in the process. She had her own personal code of ethics and she would be damned if she ever broke it.

She could all but feel him watching her from the window. She felt him watching her as she moved away from the club and was once more thankful that she had a business card with her at the door or she would have never gotten in since the place had been closed to patrons. Then again a lot of the staff knew her as well, so that was an added layer of security for her.

Relief flooded her when the bus stopped. Getting on quickly, she paid her fee and took a seat at the back. Her too-old handbag close to her chest, she leaned against the cold window and closed her eyes, letting out a shaky breath as she tried, really, really tried, to calm herself.

Shaking his head, Janos watched the bus pull away, her head resting against the window. From her body language he’d guess she was upset, but the why was what he was really curious about. Leaning forward for one last glimpse, he frowned. “What has you so tense, Miss Tremayne?” he murmured softly.

Rolling into bed in the wee hours of the morning, Janos groaned and winced slightly. He’d taken a full keg against his leg. One of the straps holding it in place on a pallet in the back room had snapped and he’d been in the way. He’d be fine by morning, but right now he was aching and bruised. Stretching out carefully, he buried his face into his pillow and drifted off.

Warmth against his back made him roll in his dream, but he still winced because his banged-up leg ached even in the dream. While he was more than ready to take on the warm and delicious body of his latest dream female, tonight it was not really an option. Instead he pulled her close, luxuriating in the feel of her skin, and just stroked her, needing something to take his mind off of earlier, even if it had been her real-life form giving him grief.

She lay on her bed. Wrapped in the blankets and a pillow between her legs and arms, she sighed softly as she felt his arms curling around her. She spoke this time, a hoarse whisper of a sound. “Why do you torment me so? I feel your arms and your hands on me all day long. You touched me and gave me my very first orgasm all while I was in my office. However, when I came to see you, you weren’t the lover of my dreams. Am I doing this to myself?” she asked, knowing she was. How else could anyone invade her dreams and give her the pleasures he did?

Nuzzling her neck, he breathed her in and wondered if the scent was a memory of his dreams or of the real woman from earlier. “I don’t mean to torment you,” he murmured against her throat. “But then again, you’re tormenting me as well. You insult me and then run like a scared rabbit. Not exactly inspiring for a man to do anything that he dreams of doing when a woman acts that way,” he pointed out softly.

Hugging her to him, he purposely kept his hands from straying. “Why are you so afraid, Mina?” he asked, using her given name, but only in the dreams. She wasn’t ready for him to be doing the same in reality.

Frowning, he stilled. Why was he dreaming of her and how was he able to remember that they knew one another in the waking world, too? The fact that she knew him in the dream and was now conversing with him had him questioning everything he knew as well. Some vague reference from his childhood niggled in the back of his mind, wanting to be known, but then she shifted and all thoughts went out the window.

“Because you scare me, Janos.” She used his first name in the dream. It was, after all, safe in the confines of her own imagination. “Not because you are a Wolf, but because you make me question the desires I have. You make me hot and I know nothing about you.”

He made her want to break her own personal code of rules. He made her want.

“I live a simple life, I ask for nothing I haven’t worked hard for, I want no special treatment, but you come into my dreams and give me such intense pleasure that I know, I know that if it were real, I would become addicted and then lose myself. I can’t do that.” She moved closer into his arms, silent tears burning his chest, manifesting physically on his chest in his bed even as his scent wrapped around her physical form on her bed.

Pressing her closer, Janos rubbed her back gently. “Shh, Mina, don’t cry, honey,” he murmured softly, her tears a physical pain to him. “If it were real, little one, it would be better. It would be give and take,” he said softly. “You might lose a little of yourself, but you might gain something more.”

“I wish you were right.” She had seen it too many times, the girls who needed out of the home. They would give themselves to “love” and “those” men, become pregnant, and then be alone, with a child. It was a horrible and vicious cycle to be sure.

Good gods, what was he talking about? He knew nothing about relationships, and yet that was where his mind was heading, talking her into something more and in a damned dream no less.

“If only you didn’t hate humans as much as you do, Janos, I might one day find the courage to touch you in real life and not only in my dreams.”

“I don’t hate humans,” he told her quietly, “but you do drive me to some serious thinking on finding ways to get good and drunk some days.”

Turning her face up to him, she kissed the base of his neck and then the underside of his chin. “Thank you for just holding me. The sex in my dreams is mind blowing, earth shattering, and soul searing, but this, this is perfection.” Simply being held as if she meant something more than a piece of meat to assuage a need was wonderful.

Moving his hand up, he gently massaged her neck as he held her close. “If you ever get the urge to touch me, let me know. I’ll even stand still for you if you feel like petting me.” Now that idea had some merit, he thought with a half smile.

“Considering the fact that I will never see you again except in my dreams, I think that I will survive.” Her hands did stroke him now, however, petted him as if he were her own personal love to hold, to keep, and to protect. “I need to rest, Janos. I want to stay here talking to you all night in my sleep, but I need to rest because tomorrow is laundry day.”

Lifting his brows, he chuckled. “You need to rest for laundry day?” he asked softly. “I never knew it was so stressful that you need to get so much sleep.” Stroking her hair lightly, he pressed her cheek to his chest. “Sleep, Mina,” he murmured, breathing her in even as his body in his own bed shifted and he winced in the dream.

“When you do laundry for yourself, your landlady, and her five kids, and have to ride the city bus to the coin mat, yes, laundry day is one where I need to rest beforehand.” It really wasn’t a bad life. She had a roof over her head, food in her belly, most days, and by doing the laundry for her landlady, she cut an extra thirty dollars a week off her rent, and it was good all the way around.

Frowning at her words, Janos shook his head, his chin rubbing over the top of her head at the motion. “Sounds like a lot of work,” he murmured softly even though he had a definite other opinion of the situation. To him it sounded like she was being taken advantage of, her and her generous nature.

It felt nice, sleeping in her bed as she was and feeling his chest under her cheek. It was nice to feel like, for that moment, someone cared for her. No strings attached, just cared for her. “I can’t get over how nice this feels. To be held in your arms like this, it’s really very nice.” Too bad she was too chicken to try to see if in real life he could feel this nice. Nope, she was going on major avoidance from here on out.

“I’m glad, Mina,” he told her honestly. “But you need to sleep, honey,” he added, feeling something tugging at him to wake. He wanted her really out of it so she wouldn’t notice he wasn’t there.