Touching Eternity (Touch Series 1.5) (23 page)

Isaiah dropped into a chair, stuffing all ten fingers through his hair and fisting. “Oh Jesus!”

“Language!”

Isaiah ignored him. “What the hell did I do?”

“What are you talking about?” Garrison demanded, stalking around the desk to stand before him.

Isaiah leapt to his feet. “I left her because you told me to! I left her thinking she was in good hands! You tortured her! Then you let that bastard…” He broke off, feeling the fine point of fury piercing the last shred of his control. White-hot rage veiled his vision and he had to storm away before he broke his hand in the other man’s face. “I trusted you to keep her safe.”

“You can’t fault me for what Tomas did!” Garrison followed him across the room. “Had I known, I would have dealt with him sooner.”

Isaiah stopped and turned to face him. “Dealt with him how?”

Garrison stilled. A steel wall slammed shut over his features. “You needn’t concern yourself with that. I assure you, he will never harm another soul again.”

Isaiah waited for the concern to rise, for the anger. Instead, he was unnaturally satisfied and the anger that did spark was only because he hadn’t done the job himself.

Garrison caught the glint in his eyes and his features became very cattish, very smug. “You and I aren’t that different, Isaiah. We’re not different at all. I see a lot of myself in you. We both have a bone-deep need to protect those we love in whatever manner is at our disposal, just like we both want what’s best for Amalie. You know I would never cause her harm.”

Not a lie. Garrison meant it. He truly believed he was doing the right thing, that he was helping Amalie, that he was making her better. The fact disgusted Isaiah more than if he’d been lied to. There was once a time he would have been elated to be considered like Garrison. The man had always been his idol, his hero, but at that moment, his skin crawled at the very idea of being anything like him.

Keep your head!
A hidden voice at the back of his mind hissed.
Now isn’t the time to lose control.

As much as Isaiah wanted to sneer at the sensible suggestion, he recognized it for what it was — necessary.

“You’re right,” he backpedaled smoothly. “The important thing here is Amalie.”

Garrison visibly relaxed. His mouth bowed into a pleased smile. “I’m so relieved to hear that. For a moment there…” he trailed off, releasing a soft chuckle. He patted Isaiah on the shoulder lightly. Isaiah fought not to flinch away. “I understand you’re as upset about these turn of events as I am, but we must remain steadfast! We can’t let them win.”

Isaiah frowned. “Let who win?”

Garrison walked back to the desk. He knelt and gathered the horrific snapshots off the floor. He studied them, his face showing no signs of disgust or regret, only a quiet deliberation.

“The enemy, Isaiah,” he said at last, dropping the photos down on the papers. “They lurk in the shadows, like snakes waiting to strike when our guard is down. We can’t let that happen.”

Isaiah edged a few steps closer, careful to keep a wide distance between him and the man across the room. “Who’s the enemy?”

For several long moments, Garrison said nothing as he neatly stacked the papers and tucked them into a folder. He nimbly walked around to the edge of the desk and dropped everything into the waste basket.

“There are too many to count.” He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “Each one wants us to fail. This new betrayal will set us back, but I think if we plan this out correctly, we might get on track much quicker.”

A frown pulled on Isaiah’s face, drawing his brows together into a knot. “What do you mean?”

Garrison turned to him, his face carefully blank except for the spark of anticipation in his eyes. “We need to start fresh, from the beginning.”

Isaiah

The door, a single slab of white wood, carved meticulously with webs of ivy and garnished with a brass knob, was nothing special. In the end, it was still a flimsy piece of wood. He could kick it down with a single blow. Yet it possessed some inexplicable magic that restrained him from doing so. It was the only thing separating him from the other half of himself, which was ironic because that door had been there for years and it had never stopped him before. It had never kept him from going inside. It was surreal. It was frustrating.

The cool wood kissed his clammy brow as he leaned into it, closing his eyes and wishing he could hit something. His hands balled into fists at his sides, knuckles popped and ached. Part of him wondered why he was even there. What could he possibly say to her to make what he did forgivable? He was certain that even if she did forgive him, he could never forgive himself. It would forever be something that haunted him, ate him up from the inside out. She could never hate him half as much as he hated himself.

“I’m so sorry!” he whispered into the smooth grain.

Careful not to make too much noise, he slid to the floor and folded his legs up to his chest. He propped his elbows on his knees and cradled his face into his palms.

Directly, he’d had no hand in what happened, but he’d helped and that made him as guilty as Garrison, as Tomas. He’d sworn to protect her, had looked straight into her eyes and sworn it, but at the first chance, when she needed him most, he’d turned his back on her and left her at the hands of evil. There were no other words to describe the horror she had to face alone and it was his fault. How could he ever think he could help others when he was a monster? How could he protect others when he couldn’t even keep the love of his life safe?

The heels of his hands pressed half moons into his stinging eyes. Little sparks burst beneath the pressure. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. When he’d left it was with the impression that Amalie would benefit. It was supposed to be for her own good.

***

“
Isaiah!” The soft, sweet scent of her collided with him about the same time her tiny body did. Thin arms looped around his throat, choking him, but he laughed, scooping her up and doing a twirl. Her melodious laughter rang in his ear like bells.

“
You’re home!” She panted, pulling back to peer into his face. She was as beautiful as ever with her blue eyes dancing with delight and her cheeks flushed. She wore a baby pink dress that highlighted the glow in her face. “I missed you!”

He grinned. “I missed you, too.”

Beaming, she pushed up onto her toes and kissed him lightly on the lips. “When are you going to talk to him?”

He threw his head back and laughed at her eagerness. “Right now. I wanted to see you first.”

She bit her bottom lip and gave a giddy little jump on the balls of her feet. “I can’t wait! I’ve thought of nothing else.” The color in her cheeks deepened. “I found a dress.” She faltered, dropped her gaze. “I think. I’ve never seen a wedding dress and I don’t have anyone to ask, but…it’s white…” she trailed off uncertainly.

He tucked a finger beneath her chin, tipping it up so he could kiss her lightly on the lips. “You can wear a dishtowel for all I care. I just want to marry you and be with you forever.”

“
I want it to be perfect! I want it to be…normal.”

He sighed, caressing her cheek tenderly with his knuckles. “It’ll be amazing.”

She started to smile, faltered. “Do you still want to do this, Isaiah? I won’t be angry if—”

His finger pressed into her lips, silencing her. “Nothing can change my mind. I’ve waited my whole life for you.” He kissed her.

She pulled back. Her fingers traced the curve of his face. “I don’t know much about the world outside these doors, but I do know no one has ever loved anyone as much as I love you.”

His kiss was harder, as if he were trying to imprint her words onto his lips. He broke it a second later, breathing hard.

“
Wait for me in the garden. I’ll meet you there after I’ve talked to your father.”

With a delighted squeal, she spun on her heels and hurried away.

Isaiah watched her go, his stomach in knots. He closed his eyes and willed himself not to throw up. Nothing in Military school had prepared him for this. His stern, stone-faced instructors could never instill fear the way Garrison’s disapproval did. Isaiah had no idea how he was going to bring this conversation to light, but he knew it could only end in one of two ways. Garrison could deny him, deeming him unworthy of his daughter, which would hurt in more ways than one, or he accepted Isaiah into his daughter’s life the way Garrison had accepted him into his. Isaiah was hoping for the latter. Garrison had never denied him anything. He’d gone far and beyond to make sure Isaiah had everything he needed. Now, he needed Amalie. But even if Garrison had taken him in, a dirty orphan with nothing but a bad attitude and even worse manners, that didn’t mean he wanted that filth marrying his only child. Plus, there was the fact that Isaiah had no idea who his parents were. He couldn’t even remember what his mother’s name was and she’d more or less raised him for the first eight years of his life. He was a nobody. Did he even deserve someone like Amalie?

Yes!
A voice in his head hissed, warning him not to get stupid ideas, to not venture down that path. He may not deserve her, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to give her up. He’d never been a greedy man until her. But he wanted her. Needed her. He would cease to exist without her. If being with her for the rest of his life meant facing her father, facing the possibility of losing everything, he would do it so long as she became his.

“
Isaiah!” Garrison strode towards him, his long strides eating up the distance the way Isaiah’s insides seemed to want to do to his stomach.

He straightened. “Sir!”

Garrison beamed, slapping Isaiah affectionately on the shoulder. “My boy! You’re home.” He was yanked into a fierce embrace. His back was thumped by a fist. “Good to have you back!”

Flustered, Isaiah drew away, offering the man a weak smile. “It’s good to be back, sir.”

His back was smacked again with an open hand this time. “Come. I have much to tell you.”

“
That’s great, sir.” He cleared his throat. “I actually have something to tell you, too.”

With an arm around Isaiah’s shoulder, Garrison propelled them down the corridor towards his office. “You don’t mind if I go first, do you?”

Mind? No, he definitely did not mind. It may give him a chance to think about what he wanted to say.

“
No, sir. I don’t mind.”

Garrison smiled toothily, nudging Isaiah into the office with a push to his back. Neither spoke until they were seated on opposite sides of the desk.

“
Summer vacation already.” Garrison folded his fingers on the desk. “Almost another year, your last year.”

Already in knots, Isaiah could only smile in response.

Garrison continued. “I feel like it was only yesterday I brought you home.” He laughed a little, the sound forced. “Best decision I ever made if you ask me. Ruth would disagree with me, of course, but you were such a hellion, always sneaking into the kitchen and stealing the sweets.”

Despite his nerves, Isaiah laughed at the memory. “She would just leave them out in the open! What did she expect?”

Garrison chuckled. “I lost count of all the times she’d come to me, swearing up and down she’d strangle you.”

“
I like to think I charmed her in the end.”

Garrison’s eyes narrowed. “How
did
you charm her? You never did tell me.”

Isaiah grinned. “A man has to have his secrets sometimes.” And a giant box of Swedish chocolates.

Garrison laughed, putting his hands up. “Fair enough.” He sighed, sitting back. “It’s so good to relax like this after the few months I’ve been having.”

All humor vanished. Isaiah straightened. “Is everything all right?”