Tramp for the Lord (21 page)

I wanted to cry, as a child cries when she is happy. But I have learned to control my tears (most of the time, anyway) and was content just to tell the Lord of my deep thankfulness. The Lord is so good, for He has given me so many friends, just like this, all over the world.

It was during one of my visits in this Colorado home that I received an early morning telephone call. I was already awake, since we intended to leave that afternoon to fly to Washington to speak in a series of meetings arranged by Mr. Vereide.

The phone call was from Alicia Davison, Mr. Vereide’s daughter. “Oh, Alicia, I cannot wait to see you today. I am looking forward to it and the meetings in your fellowship house.”

There was a pause, then Alicia said, “Tante Corrie, Dad is with the Lord.”

“Oh, Alicia …” I tried to speak, but nothing else would come out.

“It is all right, Tante Corrie,” she said calmly. “I am calling to ask you to please come on to be with all of us. We will not have the meetings, but so many people are coming, and we want you to be with us.”

“I shall be there this afternoon,” I said. After a brief prayer over the phone, I hung up.

I hurried to finish my packing, remembering all the kindnesses that had been poured on me by this wonderful family and their many friends. I have faced death many times, but there is always an empty place in my heart when someone I know and love leaves to be with the Lord. Nor did it ever occur to me that almost two years later I would once again fly to Washington to sit in that same Presbyterian Church—not to attend a memorial for Abraham Vereide but to attend the meeting in honor of Alicia. Although still young and beautiful, she would die in Hong Kong while making a mission tour with her husband, Howard Davison.

I was warmly received by my friends in Washington. Although sad, they were rejoicing in the Lord. That night after I had gone to my room, I prayed, “Lord,” I asked, “why are people so kind to me? I am just a simple old Dutch woman. Why am I treated so graciously and shown so much hospitality?”

Then the Lord reminded me of my mother’s blessing box.

Our house in Haarlem was not really big, but it had wide open doors.

I do not suppose that the many guests who were always coming to the Beje ever realized what a struggle it was to make both ends meet. Yet many lonesome people found a place with us and joined in our music, humor and interesting conversation. There was always a place at the oval dinner table, although perhaps the soup was a bit watery when too many unexpected guests showed up. Our entire home was centered in the ministry of the gospel. All people who came to us were either workers in the kingdom of God or people who needed help.

Mother loved all her guests. She often showed her love by dropping a penny in the “blessing box” when they arrived.

The blessing box was a small metal box that sat on the sideboard near the oval dinner table. Here money was collected for the mission that was so close to our hearts. Every time our family was blessed in a particular way, Mother would drop money in the blessing box as a thank offering to God. This was especially true if Father sold an expensive watch or received extra money for repairing an antique clock.

Whenever visitors came, Mother would spread her arms wide and welcome them, and then to show how she really appreciated their presence would say, “A penny in the blessing box for your coming.” If it were a special visitor, she might even put in a dime.

Then, at the dinner table, Father would always bless our visitors, thanking God that our house was privileged by their presence. It was always a special occasion for us all.

I well remember the sister-in-law of a minister who spent the night with us. The next morning Tante Anna went to her room and found her sheet twisted into a rope and lying across the bed.

“What is this?” Tante Anna asked.

The woman broke down in tears. “I must confess. Last night I wanted to commit suicide. I made my sheet into a rope and tied it around my neck to jump from the window. But I could not forget the prayer at the dinner table, as Mr. ten Boom thanked God that I could come and share in this hospitality. God spared my life through that prayer.”

After a few days in Washington, I continued my traveling as a tramp for the Lord. However, fresh on my mind was the hospitality of my dear friends. And I remembered Mother’s blessing box and Father’s prayers.

Often I am dependent on the hospitality of Christians. God’s people have been so generous to open their homes to me, and many times when I lay my head on a strange pillow, which has been blessed by the love of my friends, I realize that I am enjoying the reward for the open doors and open hearts of the Beje.

Heaven will be blessed, but here on earth I already am enjoying a “house with many mansions.”

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness
.

1 John 1:9

I
t would seem, after having been a Christian for almost eighty years, that I would no longer do ugly things that need forgiving. Yet I am constantly doing things to others that cause me to have to go back and ask their forgiveness. Sometimes these are things I actually do—other times they are simply attitudes I let creep in which break the circle of God’s perfect love.

I first learned the secret of closing the circle from my nephew, Peter van Woerden, who was spending the weekend with me in our little apartment in Baarn, Holland.

“Do you remember that boy, Jan, that we prayed for?” Peter asked.

I well remember Jan. We had prayed for him many times. He had a horrible demon of darkness in his life. Although we had fasted and prayed and cast out the demon in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, the darkness always returned.

Peter continued, “I knew God had brought this boy to me not only so he could be delivered, but to teach me some lessons too.”

I looked at Peter. “What could that boy, Jan, so filled with darkness, teach you?”

“I did not learn the lesson from Jan,” Peter smiled. “But from God. Once in my intercession time for Jan, the Lord told me to open my Bible to 1 John 1:7–9.I read that passage about confessing our sin and asked the Lord what that had to do with the darkness in Jan’s life.”

Peter got up and walked across the room, holding his open Bible in his hand. “God taught me that if a Christian walks in the light, then the blood of Jesus Christ cleanses him from all sin, making his life a closed circle and protecting him from all outside dark powers. But—” he turned and emphatically jabbed his finger into the pages of the Bible—“if there is unconfessed sin in that life, the circle has an opening in it—a gap—and this allows the dark powers to come back in.”

Ah
, I thought,
Peter has really learned a truth from the Lord
.

“Tante Corrie,” Peter continued, “even though I was able to cast out the demon in Jan’s life, it always crept back in through the opening in the circle—the opening of Jan’s unconfessed sin. But when I led Jan to confess this sin, then the circle was closed, and the dark powers could no longer return.”

That same week the wife of a good friend came to me for counseling. After I had fixed her a cup of tea, she began to tell me about all the people who had prayed for her, yet she was still experiencing horrible dreams at night.

I interrupted her conversation and drew a circle on a piece of paper. “Mary,” I said, “do you have unconfessed sin in your life? Is this the reason the circle is still open?”

Mary said nothing, sitting with her head down, her hands tightly clasped in her lap, her feet together. I could see there was a strong battle going on in her life—a battle between spiritual forces.

“Do you really want to be free?” I urged.

“Oh, yes,” she said.

Suddenly she began telling me about a strong hatred she had for her mother. Everyone thought she loved her mother, but inside there were things that caused her actually to want to kill her. Yet, even as she spoke, I saw freedom coming into her eyes.

She finished her confession and then quickly asked Jesus to forgive her and cleanse her with His blood. I looked into her eyes and commanded the demon of hatred to leave in the name of Jesus.

What joy! What freedom!

Mary raised her hands in victory and began to praise the Lord, thanking Him for the liberation and forgiveness He had given her. Then she reached over and embraced me in a hug so tight I thought she would crack my ribs.

“Dear Lord,” she prayed, “I thank You for closing the circle with Your blood.”

Having thus learned to close the circle by confessing my sins, I wish I could say that ever since then the circle has remained closed in my life. It is not so. For since Satan comes against us so often, then it is necessary to confess often also. Regardless of how old a person may be, or how long he has ministered in the name of Jesus Christ, that man still needs to confess his sins again and again—and ask forgiveness.

This truth became painfully clear to me recently when I was invited to Washington, D.C., to speak to a luncheon of businessmen and women. I love to talk to businessmen and was very excited about the meeting. When I arrived, however, I found only women present. This upset me, for I felt that men needed to hear the message of forgiveness also.

After the meeting a fine-looking lady came up to me. “I am in charge of arranging the program for the world convention of our ladies’ group,” she said. “Some of the most influential women in the world will be present. Would you come speak to us in San Francisco?”

I was still miffed that no men had been present for the luncheon. It’s not that I disapprove of women’s meetings. But I am concerned when men leave the spiritual activity to the women. God is calling
men
. Thus, I gave her a short, discourteous answer. “No, I will not. I must speak to men also. I don’t like this business of all women.”

She was very gracious. “Don’t you feel that you are the right person?” she asked.

“No,” I said, “I am not the right person. I do not like this American system where men go about their business, leaving the women to act like Christians. I will not come.” I turned and walked away.

Later that afternoon I was in my room, packing to catch the plane. The Lord began dealing with me. “You were very rude to that woman,” He told me.

I argued with the Lord. “But Lord, I feel that Your message is for all people, not just the women.”

“You were very rude to that woman,” He said again, gently.

He was right, of course. He always is. I had been speaking on forgiveness, but was unwilling to ask forgiveness for myself. I knew I was going to have to go to that gracious woman and apologize—confess my sin. Until I did, the circle would be open in my life, and Satan would be pouring in many other dark thoughts as well.

I looked at my watch and saw I had only enough time to finish my packing and get to the airport. It made no difference. If I left Washington without closing the circle, I would be no good anywhere else. I would just have to miss my plane.

I called the front desk and found which room the woman was in. Then I went to her room. “I must ask your forgiveness,” I said as she opened the door. “I spoke to you rudely.”

She was embarrassed and tried to pass it off. “Oh, no,” she said, “you were not unkind. I understand perfectly. I too feel that men should be the spiritual leaders, not women.”

She was returning my unkindness with kindness, but that was not what I needed. I needed for her to admit that I was wrong about not speaking to women, and forgive me. I know it is often more difficult to forgive than to ask forgiveness, but it is equally important. To withhold forgiveness often leaves another person in bondage, unable to close the circle, and thus open to further attacks from Satan. It is as important to forgive as it is to ask forgiveness.

This sensitive woman understood. Reaching out and tenderly touching my hand, she said, “I understand, Tante Corrie. I forgive you for your remarks about women’s groups, and I forgive you for being unkind to me.”

That was what I needed to hear. In the future I would indeed speak to women’s groups. I would also keep a watch on my lips when tempted to speak unkindly. I missed my plane, but the circle was closed.

And there came a certain poor widow, and she threw in two mites…. And [He] saith unto them, Verily I say unto you, That this poor widow hath cast more in, than all they which have cast into the treasury: For all they did cast in of their abundance; but she of her want did cast in all that she had, even all her living
.