Translucent (16 page)

“What do you mean by
submit
?” She crinkles her forehead up, perplexed. “I’m not looking for a relationship where I’m not free to express my opinion or have to ask permission to do anything, and I’m damn sure not interested in being subjected to emotional belittling or physical pain—in or out of the bedroom.” The level of concern in her voice escalates with each word.

“Blake, Blake, calm down.” I attempt to soothe her by tenderly caressing the back of her hand with my thumb. “I’m not asking you to not have an opinion, and though I’d like to know where you are most of the time, you don’t have to ask me for permission. More importantly, I have no intentions of tearing you down or hurting you,” I explain. “On the contrary, I want to build you up and worship you. All I ask is for you to have a little faith in me to begin with, and as the trust between us grows, you’ll see I only want what’s best for you.”

“I still don’t understand what
you’d
get out of this arrangement?”

“You, sweet girl, just you,” I reply honestly. “I’m a different person when I’m around you—peaceful, yet energized, surreal, yet aware—and I crave that feeling. Let me take care of you; it will make me happy.”

Dropping her shoulders, she exhales loudly and sits quietly for a few minutes staring at her wine glass. Finally, she speaks. “Okay, I’m willing to try, but I’m making no promises. I will most likely screw this up in some way.”

“Neither of us is perfect. We’ll both make mistakes,” I contend.

“Wait, I’m not done.” This time, she’s the one to take my hands in hers, interlacing our fingers. “You’re asking me to grant you a little trust, and I need the same in return. There are parts of my past I can’t talk about, and I can’t talk about why that is either, so please don’t pressure me. This is a deal breaker. You’re welcome to ask me questions, but if I tell you I can’t answer, drop it and don’t be mad. I will treat you with the same respect regarding people and events from before we met. You were the one who told me not to be a prisoner of my past, and I’m going to need your help to break free from it, not return to it.”

Willing to concede this topic for now, I grin wickedly at her, hoping to bring her mind back to the here and now. “Deal. Now bring your little ass over here so I can touch you,” I say, patting my upper thigh.

Her face lights up as she slides off the stool and bounces over to me. Looping my arms around her waist, I pull her into my lap and nuzzle the side of her neck. “No questions or discussions about any of that tonight,” I promise. “I want to give you a sneak peek of how I plan to take care of you for many nights to come.”

Tensing slightly at my comment, I clarify myself. “No sex tonight, sweet girl,” I whisper against the soft skin directly under her earlobe. “At least, not for me. Tonight is about you relaxing and reveling in the sense of touch.”

She leans her head back on my shoulder and tilts it slightly to face me. Placing a single delicate kiss on the corner of my mouth, she gives me all of the go-ahead I need. In one sweeping motion, I stand up and scoop her into my arms, taking us both upstairs to my bed. I can’t ever remember being so fucking excited about knowing I’m not going to get to come.

I’
VE
GOT
TO
START
SOMEWHERE
, and I’m taking off in a full-sprint with the intimidating and impassioned Madden Decker. Still unsure if I’m making the best decision, I agree to make my best attempt to whatever this arrangement of sorts he’s proposing. I’m still worried and hesitant, to say the least, but I can’t deny his claim of the enigmatic draw we feel towards each other. I know if I walk away without taking him up on his offer, I’ll always wonder about the should’ve, could’ve, would’ves. At worst, it can’t be as horrid as my previous situation, and at best…well, I’m not sure, but my imagination can come up with some pretty remarkable scenarios.

When we reach Madden’s bedroom, he smoothly lowers me to the ground so that I’m standing before him. Nervous, yet eager, my eyes are locked on his, waiting for his instructions on what to do. Hastily, he yanks his t-shirt over his head, leaving him only in his jeans, barefooted. I lift my hand to touch his smooth chest, but he catches my hand in his and shakes his head no.

“All about you tonight, sweet girl,” he reminds me before kissing my hand and releasing it back to my side.

Grasping the bottom hem of my blouse, he languidly raises it up, first revealing the damaged skin of my abdomen, followed by my white lacy bra, and finally, he frees my body from it. His nimble fingers travel to my pants, where he makes quick work of the button and zipper, and then crouches down in front of me as they drop to the floor, helping me step out of them. Returning to his full height, he moves back from me slightly and allows his eyes to brazenly roam the length of my barely-covered body. Feeling over-exposed under his scrutinizing gaze, I instinctively wrap my arms in front of my chest and the lower part of my stomach, but again, he stops me.

“No hiding, Blake. I want to see you…all of you,” he says in a rumbling baritone as he peels my limbs away from my body. “You’re so fucking beautiful.”

Taking my hand in his, he leads me over to the bed and instructs me to lie down in the middle, propping my head up with several pillows. My entire body is trembling with nervous enthusiasm. He walks to the end of the mattress, crawls up on the elevated surface, and grabs ahold of my left foot. Slowly, methodically, he begins to massage the arch in my foot, applying the perfect amount of pressure to make me moan in delight. He’s watching me watch him, his eyes darkening to a cobalt blue, and as he gradually begins to work his kneading digits up to my calf and behind my knee, the tight bundle of nerves coiled up that is body begins to unravel.

His strong fingers walk their way up to my thigh, not missing an inch of flesh, and the closer he gets to the apex of my legs, all of the moisture in my body travels to meet his touch, leaving my mouth dry and my panties wet. Mere inches before he reaches my aching sex, he removes his hands from my leg and my eyes fly up to meet his, confused and frustrated. Smirking at my reaction, he moves back down the bed and lifts my other foot, starting the entire process over. I lean my head back into the pillow and close my eyes, allowing the gratification of his touch to spread throughout me. Again, right before I think he’s going to touch me where my thighs meet, he withdraws his hands.

Groaning with exasperation, he chuckles softly and travels up my body, placing sensual, open-mouthed kisses from just below my belly button all the way up to my neck. The fire his mouth and hands ignite inside of me is burning out of control by the time he’s hovering over me, face-to-face.

“Pleasure, my sweet girl, is ninety percent anticipation,” he whispers to me, our noses touching and gazes firmly locking on each other.

Then, a moment occurs just before he lowers his lips to mine, when nothing else in the world matters—not what happened in the past, or what may happen in the future.

A split second of pure, soul-searching, heart-stopping perfection.

Me giving myself to him…completely, entirely.

A moment so brief in time, but so profound in intensity.

And once his mouth reaches mine, nothing will ever be the same.

I am his. Willingly.

Our lips meet in a searing embrace, desirous and hungry, each claiming the other as their own. Mouths part, tongues collide, and everything around me becomes hazy. Burying my fingers in his messy, sandy hair, one of his hands slides up to my neck as the other finds my breast, dipping underneath the concealing fabric and sweeping over the swell of flesh. Moaning into his mouth as his thumb brushes across my hardened nipple, he smiles slyly and pulls back a bit, gauging my reaction. With one hand, he reaches around my back, unhooks the clasp, and tosses the bra to the floor. Sucking and lightly nipping at my full bottom lip, his hand alternates back and forth between my boobs, rolling my freed nipples between his thumb and forefinger. Arching my back into his heavenly touch, his mouth begins to descend to my jawline, neck, and finally lands on my chest. He draws one nipple in-between his teeth, and his tongue teasingly flicks back and forth over it as his hand continues to work the other.

“Your skin tastes so damn good. I want to kiss every part of your body,” he murmurs with his head buried in my chest.

The desirous craving in my body rapidly grows into a ravenous hunger, and without realizing it, I’ve wrapped my legs around his hips and am rubbing my throbbing pussy against the erect cock hidden under his jeans. Halting his oral ministrations, he lifts his body up so I can no longer press against him. I whimper at the loss of friction, and he laughs huskily.

“Slow and steady. Let me take care of you,” he warns.

Relaxing back into the sheets, I nod and croak out, “I’m sorry.”

Mercifully, he doesn’t make me wait long. Lowering his head back to my belly, he trails kisses in a random pattern around my cuts as one of his hands slips between our bodies. After lazily tracing the elastic edge of my panties for a few minutes, his fingers slide inside the waistband, tenderly brushing back and forth over the delicate flesh of my lower abdomen. As they continue to travel farther south, my entire body tightens in anticipation, wanting nothing more than his hands on my most sensitive spot.

Peering up at me through his thick lashes, he flashes me a knowing smile. “Hands on the headboard, and I want you to lie back and close your eyes. Focus on the feeling, nothing else. Does that sound okay?”

“Yes,” I reply, doing exactly as he says, removing my hands from his hair and grasping onto the wood above my head.

“Yes, what?” he growls, the vibration from his voice reverberating through my frame.

“Yes, Sir,” I answer quickly, my core flooding as I say it.

“That’s my sweet girl,” he praises me.
Fuck, that turns me on.

Seconds later, his fingers are gently grazing my damp folds, up and down, down and up. Parting my swollen lips, he begins to move his finger in a slow, circular pattern over my clit. I’m afraid I’m going to come immediately, but he knows exactly how much pressure to apply and how to build me up before bringing me back down. Withdrawing his hand for a quick moment to slide my panties down my legs, he quickly resumes his sensual assault. Gliding his fingers down to my drenched opening, he dips one finger inside me, then drags the sticky juices of my arousal back up to my clit and begins rubbing my tiny bundle of nerves again.

My knees fall open, giving him complete access to me, and I forget to care about modesty. His touch makes me feel things I’ve never experienced, and I’m drunk with lust. Back and forth, his fingers move from my wet pussy to my throbbing clit over and over until I’m sure I’m about to explode. I’m a writhing mess as I grind shamelessly onto his hand. When he adds a second finger deep inside me, I lift my hips and moan loudly, unable to hold it in anymore.

“Madden, please, oh please,” I call out as he increases the rhythm of his digits thrusting in and out of me, while his thumb plays with my pebbled nub. Unable to hold back any longer, I clench my legs together and allow the ecstasy to claim me. Bright colors pass through my closed lids as I unfurl on his hand, my legs quivering uncontrollably and my lungs panting for breath.

His mouth is on me before I even come down from my high, lapping at my juices and sucking on my overly-sensitive clit. As his tongue plunges deep inside my fiery core, I’m catapulted straight into another orgasm, or maybe it’s the same one—I don’t know and I don’t care. All that matters is the onslaught of pure bliss pumping through my veins, setting my body ablaze.

Eventually, the blurred haze begins to clear, and I release my hands from the headboard, which I didn’t realize I was still holding onto for dear life. Feeling Madden’s presence next to me, I gradually open my eyes and turn my head to look at him. Sexier than I’ve ever seen him, he’s lying on his side with his head propped up on his hand, gazing down at me with his twinkling blue eyes and an impish grin smeared across his face.

“How was that for your sneak peek? Want to change your mind about sticking around?” he teases.

Lifting my head, I gently press my lips to his in an appreciative kiss. “I think you were the one doing all the sneaking and peeking,” I reply playfully. His mouth is still sticky from the remnants of my orgasm, and without thinking, I lick the residue off of my own lips, curious about how I taste.

“Sweet as sin,” he whispers gruffly, answering the question floating around in my head. “Best thing I’ve ever tasted, and it’s all mine.”

Goose bumps cover my exposed skin, partly due to being naked and chilly, and the other part because of his flattering words. After tonight, I’ll be okay if he never gets his fill of me; what he made me feel was almost otherworldly.

“You’re cold. Let me get you some clothes to put on,” he comments as I shiver beside him.

“No, it’s okay. I can put my clothes back on,” I contend. “It’s getting late, so I need to head home soon anyway.”

“Home? I don’t think so. You’re sleeping right here in this bed tonight. Next to me.”