Read Trusting Sydney: The Temptation Saga: Book Six Online
Authors: Helen Hardt
S
ydney couldn’t let
this happen. She knew that, in her rational mind.
Problem was, her rational mind didn’t control this part of her.
Right now she wanted this kiss. Wanted Sam with an astounding passion that surprised even her.
When he ripped his mouth from hers, she whimpered at the loss, but his nips and kisses on the nape of her neck soothed her.
“Oh God,” she whispered.
“I want you,” he said against her neck. “I want you so much.”
“I want you too.”
Sam pressed his mouth on hers again. The kiss was demanding this time, almost punishing. He took from her, marked her.
When he paused to take a breath, his gaze penetrated her. For a second, she could actually feel it boring beneath her skin.
“Why?” he said. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
Her tummy plummeted. “What?”
“That you were engaged? I thought we had something special. Last night was just as amazing as it was five years ago. Can you stand there and tell me you didn’t feel something?”
She gulped. Shook her head. “I felt a lot. I… You have no idea how much I felt.”
“Why did you do it?”
She averted her gaze. “I don’t know.”
That was a lie. She
did
know. She could at least tell him that much.
He cupped her cheek and returned her gaze to his. “Look at me, damnit.”
“I’m sorry,” she choked out. “I
do
know why I did it. I did it because I wanted you. Because I’ve never forgotten what it was like with you.”
“But your fiancé—”
“Is gone. I broke up with him this morning.”
“Don’t you mean he broke up with you? I’m sure you had a hell of a time explaining who I was.”
“Actually, no. I did the breaking up. I had planned to do it before I came here but I didn’t. I‘m not sure why. But I did it this morning. He was willing to forget the whole thing.”
Sam arched his eyebrows. “What?”
“That’s the kind of guy he is. It was never going to be a marriage in the real sense. I never even had sex with him.”
“What?” Sam said again.
“I never had sex with him. I told him I was saving myself for marriage. I haven’t had sex with anyone since—” She clamped her hand over her mouth.
“Since when, Sydney?” Sam gripped her shoulders. “What are you trying to say to me here?”
The truth burst from her lips. “Since
you
, damnit! I haven’t had sex since that night with you five years ago.”
His brown eyes smoked. “Is your horse taken care of?”
“Yes. I just finished.”
“Good. You’re coming with me.”
S
am’s lovemaking was forceful
, as though he were marking her, making her his.
Yet it was wonderful at the same time. Sydney wanted to be his. Wanted the passion and desire she’d only experienced with this man.
Could she dare have it?
As she straddled atop him, his cock embedded deep inside her, his fingers pulling her hard nipples, she thought, for an instant, that it could work.
He wanted her. That was obvious.
“Ride me, sweetheart. Just like that.”
His deep voice was so sexy.
“God yes, Sam, I love how you feel inside me.”
“I love it when you talk like that, baby. You make me hard.” His hips rose from the bed and he pushed farther into her.
Sydney reached down to her own special spot and began rubbing in time with Sam’s upward thrusts.
“Yeah, sweetheart, you’re so hot when you touch yourself there. God, you’re beautiful.”
“You’re beautiful too, Sam. So gorgeous. I’ve never seen a more beautiful man.”
He thrust into her. “Never like this. Never before or after you.”
He had no idea. “Amazing with you. Only with you.”
“I’m gonna come, baby.” He thrust harder.
As his shaft pulsed within her, her own orgasm blasted through her veins like boiling honey.
So good. So right.
Could she have this? Could it work?
They hadn’t said a word as they rushed to her hotel room. It wasn’t far from the rodeo arena. He’d dragged her by the hand up to the room and nearly thrown her on the bed. Frantically they’d stripped each other, and within seconds she was on top of him, impaled on him.
Now she slid off him, mourning the loss of his cock. She lay down next to him.
He propped up on one shoulder and looked at her. “We need to talk.”
Oh God.
She waited.
He cleared his throat. “I want to be able to trust you.”
“I know.”
“You should have told me you were engaged.”
“You’re absolutely right. And I shouldn’t have gone to bed with you while I was engaged to someone else, even if I was intending to end it.”
“You’re right.”
“This isn’t an excuse, but…I couldn’t resist you, Sam. I couldn’t resist you five years ago, and I couldn’t now. I’m not afraid to go after what I want, but I’m not the type who goes around having one-night stands.”
“You invited me to your room that night, Sydney.”
“I know. And it wasn’t like me at all. There was something about you.”
He nodded. “I understand, believe it or not. I never believed in chemistry before. I never believed in love at first sight.”
Her heart lurched. “Love at first sight?”
“I’m sorry. I don’t want to scare you.”
Adrenaline spiked through her. “I’m not scared, just a little confused. What exactly are you saying?”
“We know little about each other, but I can tell you one thing. I have never in my life felt the way I do when I’m with you.”
“Neither have I.”
“Then is it love we’re feeling?”
“I don’t know.”
“From my end, it sure seems to be.”
Warmth flooded her. Did he truly love her? Could it possibly happen? Even with everything else she hadn’t told him yet?
He caressed her cheek. “I love you, Sydney.”
She shouldn’t say it back. It would just make things harder, but the words tumbled off her tongue. “I love you too, Sam. God, I love you so much.”
She meant the words with all her heart.
It was now or never. She had to level with him. He deserved the truth. She might lose him, but she could no longer live the lie.
“Sam, I need to tell you something.”
“What is it, baby?”
A knock on the door interrupted her. “Who could that be? I know Mom and Dad were keeping Duke at the rodeo to watch the rest of the events. He already had his nap before my race.”
“Whoever it is, get rid of him,” Sam said, pressing his lips to hers. “I want you back in this bed.”
She smiled. Saved by the knock. For now at least. She pulled on her robe and opened the door.
“Hello, darling Sydney,” Rod Kyle said.
“What are you doing here?”
He pushed past her and walked into the room. Sam, still naked, jumped to his feet.
“For God’s sake, put some clothes on,” Rod said, turning his head.
Sam hurried into his jeans. “What’s going on, Sydney? I thought you two were over.”
“We are. Why are you here, Rod?”
“I did a little digging today, and I found some stuff that I thought you might find interesting.”
“Nothing you have to say interests me,” she said. “Now leave, please.”
“Not until I say what I came to say.”
“You heard the lady,” Sam said. “Get the hell out of here.”
Rod was no match for muscular Sam. Yet he didn’t seem fazed.
“You and your friend here might be interested in this.” He handed a paper to Sydney.
She gulped. “Oh God.”
“What is it?” Sam ripped the document out of her hands.
He scanned the paper. “A birth certificate. Baby Boy Buchanan? With you as the mother?”
Her heart sank. Now he knew the truth, and it wouldn’t take long for him to put two and two together.
“September first? Five years ago? And you haven’t had sex with anyone since me?” He stalked toward her. “Goddamnit, you had my baby, and I never even knew it!”
R
od smiled a smug grin
. “This just keeps getting better. I didn’t expect this turn of events. I just thought you had a child when you were a young maid of nineteen.”
“Nineteen?” Sam reddened. “You were only nineteen? That makes you twenty-four now?”
“Nearly twenty-five. Next month, in fact.”
“Christ.” Sam raked his fingers through his hair. “Where is he? Where is my son?”
She trembled, tried to keep her voice calm. “He was put up for adoption.”
“Why didn’t you contact me? I would have helped. I would have taken the child. I would have—” He plunked down on the bed, his eyes wet and sunken. “I’ve always wanted kids.”
Sydney ran to him and touched his cheek.
He pushed her hand away. “Don’t touch me.”
“Sam, I love you.”
“I don’t want to hear that right now.”
Her heart breaking, she rose and stalked toward Rod. “Why did you do this? I mean nothing to you. You admitted that this morning.”
“I don’t like being rejected. Rodney Kyle doesn’t get rejected, certainly not by the likes of you.”
“I was only some stupid trophy wife to you,” Sydney said. “Why does it matter?”
“You’re the wife I want, and I mean to have you.”
“Too bad. You can’t have me. You think you can show up with this birth certificate and turn my life upside down? And I’ll take you back?”
“You might. If you want to keep this little tidbit of news from getting out.”
Clearly he didn’t know everything. She’d have to tread carefully.
“Why should I care if it gets out?”
“I can see there’s a problem with my plan. I thought perhaps you’d want to keep the news from the father. I had no idea I’d find the actual father in your bed.”
Sam finally spoke. “Don’t talk about me like I’m not here, asshole.” He stood. “I’ll make you a deal, Kyle. You’re obviously good at finding information. Find out where my child is, and I won’t smash your face into this wall.”
Sydney froze
. Oh God.
“Should be easy enough,” Rod said. “I’ll get right to it. I do value my face, after all. But not until Sydney agrees to reinstate our engagement.”
Sydney looked pleadingly at Sam.
“What?” His eyes flashed anger. Rage. “I don’t give a fuck what you do. You gave away my child.”
Nausea crept into her throat. How could this be happening? “You just said you love me.”
He sniffed. “I’ll get over it.” He put on his shirt and boots and grabbed his hat.
He went to the desk and scribbled something on a piece of hotel stationery. He handed it to Rod. “Here’s my name and number. Find my kid. If I don’t hear from you within twenty-four hours, I swear to God I’ll hunt you down and kick your ass into next year.”
He put his hat on and left.
“What will it take for you not to find the kid?” she asked Rod.
“Since I have no desire to have that Neanderthal pummel me, I don’t see why I shouldn’t acquiesce to his request. What do you care? Don’t you want to know where your son is?”
What could she say to that? “It’s not that I don’t want to know. I just can’t dredge up that part of my life. It’s too painful.”
“What will you do for me? Marry me?”
God no, she couldn’t. She loved Sam.
Damn it, I love Sam so much.
“I’m sorry. I can’t marry you, Rod. For the life of me, I don’t know why you want me.”
“This is a blemish, that’s no lie. I don’t relish having bastard half siblings of my own flesh and blood running around.”
“See? Good. You don’t want to marry me.”
“So there’s no reason not to honor the man’s request, is there? He has a right to know where his child is.”
Sydney clenched her fists, her heart pounding. “Damn you! Why do you want to do this? Why are you trying to hurt me?”
Rod smiled sardonically. “Because I can.”
She pushed him out the door and slammed it. He was pure evil. How had she gotten involved with the likes of him?
Money
.
It all came down to money.
The purse she won today would help. They weren’t destitute after all, but the small Buchanan ranch needed help. Right now they were being forced to sell off their livestock, and a ranch couldn’t exist without its stock.
Her big brother, Blake, had abandoned them long ago, but she would not. Her parents deserved better. Duke deserved better.
Duke
.
Such an angel.
She walked to the bathroom and took off the robe. She needed a shower.
G
oddamn her to hell
!
Sam drove back to the rodeo at top speed.
Once there, he walked through the crowds, looking for Sydney’s parents. He’d find out once and for all what the hell was going on.
Maybe they didn’t even know she’d had a child.
Well, too bad. Today they’d find out. If they had any information about his kid, they were damn well going to give it to him.
God, where were they? The damn place was so fucking crowded.
“Hey, Sam!”
Crap. Dusty.
He loved his baby sister, but he did not have the time right now.
“What is it, Dust?”
“Did you have a chance to talk to Sydney?”
What was that about? “I don’t have any desire to talk to her.”
“Listen, she told me all about her engagement. She’s not in love with that guy, and she was going to break up with him anyway. Did you know they never even had sex?”
“I don’t care right now. I’m sorry, Dust, but I’m busy.”
“You don’t care? You don’t seem like you don’t care whenever you’re with her. The chemistry between you two is palpable.”
He looked above Dusty’s red-gold head, scanning for the Buchanans. “The chemistry between us, if it’s even there, is not any of your business. Right now I have to find some answers.”
“Answers about what?”
He turned and faced his sister. What the hell? She’d find out anyway. “About my child, Dusty. Sydney had my child five years ago and gave it up for adoption.”
Dusty’s eyes widened. “What?”
“It’s true. I just found out.”
“You mean Seanie has a cousin? Who’s almost his exact age?”
“Yes, Sis, that’s exactly what it means. Where’s that genius IQ of yours today? This isn’t rocket science.”
“I need to sit down.” Dusty visibly trembled.
He took his sister’s arm and found a bench with one empty spot. “Stay here,” he said. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. But right now I need to find Sydney’s parents.”
“Give me a minute,” Dusty said. “I know where they are. I saw them a while ago. They’re in the stands.”
“Where?”
“To the north.”
“Thanks, Sis. I’ll go find them.”
“I want to go with you.”
“I need to do this alone. I’ll tell you what I find out.”
His heart beat like a drum against his sternum. A child. He had a child.
A son.
A little boy.
What might he look like?
A mini Sam? A mini Sydney? A combination?
He made his way to the north stands and scanned the crowd.
Damnit, where are they?
And then he spied them, Roy and Carrie, with little Duke sitting between them. He sprinted up the stairs, nearly knocking over a hot dog vendor.
“I need to talk to you two,” he said.
“Goodness,” Carrie said. “Oh, yes, you’re Dusty’s brother.”
“Yes. Sam O’Donovan. I want some answers.”
“Answers about what?” Roy said.
“About my son. Where the hell is my son?”
Carrie’s pretty face, so like Sydney’s, whitened. “Roy—”
“I’ll take care of this, Carrie.” He turned to Sam. “Come with me, and we’ll talk.”
“No,” Carrie said, “I’m coming with you.”
“You stay here.”
“No, damnit. I’m coming with you.” She stood up and lifted her son into her arms. “Let’s get the hell out of here.”
Finding a quiet place to talk was nearly impossible, but they found a spot where the noise wasn’t so loud. Carrie sat down on a bench with Duke, and Roy took Sam around a corner and lowered his voice.
“Now, young man, what’s this about?”
“Your future son-in-law, Rod Kyle, came by with some news today. It seems Sydney had a baby five years ago.”
He didn’t seem surprised. Clearly he already knew.
“Yes. And?”
“I happen to be the child’s father.”
Roy’s eyebrows shot up. “Are you sure? She never told us who it was.”
“Why wouldn’t she tell you?”
“She probably didn’t want us to go hunting you down.”
Sam forced his teeth to unclench. “I wish she would have. I want my child.”
“He’s been adopted into a loving home.”
“How do you know?”
“It was an open adoption.”
“Then you know who has him. Tell me.”
He shook his head. “I can’t.”
“Why not?” He grabbed the collar of Roy’s shirt. “Damnit. I have a right to know where my child is!”
Roy stared into Sam’s eyes. “I’m sorry, son. I can’t give you any information.”
“Why not?”
“Because he’s with parents who love him very much. If you do anything to challenge that relationship, the only person harmed will be your son. The parents will suffer, but the child will be the ultimate loser.”
“Damnit!” Sam punched the wall. His fist went through the drywall. His knuckles bled, yet he felt no pain.
No pain at all.
Only anger.
At Sydney.
At Roy.
At Carrie.
He walked away from Roy and turned the corner. Sydney’s mother sat with Duke. He was a beautiful child. He had Sydney’s eyes.
And sandy brown hair.
Oh my God.
Was it possible?
He left Roy standing and stalked toward the woman and child. He eyed Duke up and down. Could it be?
When he noticed the little boy’s hands, his heart nearly leaped out of his chest.
They were tiny replicas of his own.