Tug (33 page)

The movers arrive just before five and I open the door. Tug doesn’t come out of the office, which I take as a challenge. If he wants to see who can stay angry the longest, he’ll lose. I don’t have a lot of things to move in. Sadly, my and Javier’s belongings fit in twelve moving boxes. I instruct the movers to place them off to the side and sign off on the delivery before they leave. My phone vibrates on the counter and I pick it up.

Tug: You hurt me, and I’m angry, but I love you. Crisis at work, and I’m on a call or I’d come out and talk.

Maria: I’m sorry.

It takes me and Javier three hours to unpack our things and eat dinner. My mind drift several times to Tug, who hasn’t left his office. I hear his voice every now and again, so I know he’s still on a call.

I curl up on the couch and think about the painting in my father’s house, the one he’s kept on display all these years. I remember the joy that sparkled in his deep brown eyes as he looked at it with me and the tear he didn’t care had fallen. His love for me is undisputable, and if I’m honest with myself, I love him too, but the resentment consuming me dominates my feelings. I close my eyes and hear the faint sound of a voice from a long time ago. I can’t even say for sure if it’s my father’s voice, or the one I imagined when my mother shared how he used to sing me to sleep with and old country song called,
Forever and Ever, Amen
.

As an immigrant helping my Papa on the farm, my father learned most of his English by listening to the radio, which in a hick town like Watsonville was overrun with county stations. The man I met in a Spanish mansion deep in the mountains of Mexico, and the man who helped bring me into this world, are two completely different men. Reconciling the confident, cartel leader, known to be a vicious killer with a younger version, singing to a baby girl in broken English isn’t all that easy to do. The song talks of a man wild and free. Mama told me he liked the song because I was the reason he settled down and wanted a family—that is until he left us.

Maybe knowing now that Mama wasn’t entirely truthful with me is where some of my anger stems from. If she’d been forthcoming with me, then maybe I could have contacted my father when she died and he could have helped financially. Maybe Papa wouldn’t have lost the farm, and then maybe we wouldn’t have moved to Oakland, and maybe I would have never met Eduardo Montez.

I suppose it’s natural for the mind to be curious about the maybe’s and the what if’s in life, things that should have turned out differently, but they don’t influence the right now’s, and wasting time pondering what could have been is pointless. Mama didn’t tell me the truth, and I should be grateful. If I’d never met Eduardo, I wouldn’t have Javier, or Tug for that matter.

Giving real thought to what Tug said about my father proves difficult as my mind rebels. I was desperate, and dirt poor, and I made bad choices. If I’m considering the
maybe’s,
then I have to be truthful and admit that when I needed the money for Papa’s surgery, I would have done anything to save him, including getting involved with the cartels. I would’ve sold my soul to the Devil himself, and in a way I did. Who am I to judge what road my father chose. At the very least, Tug is right—I should hear him out.

It’s quite a little revelation I’m having, and I feel lighter, as though the weight of my anger was with me so long I never noticed it until it was gone. I struggle to keep my eyes open when I hear the office door open. Seconds later, Tug stands over me. He doesn’t speak, but his eyes never leave mine as he lays on top of me.

I start to say I’m sorry when he puts his index finger over my lips to silence me.

“You can be angry with me if you want, freak out and hit me even. You can yell at me. You can call me every filthy name you can think of, but never say you hate me.”

My smile is just about to form when his mouth covers mine and he kisses me like it’s been years since we’ve seen each other. I kiss him back with equal hunger, winding my arms around his neck. And then, because I don’t feel close enough to him, I wrap both legs around his hips and squeeze until I can’t draw him any closer. He groans, his mouth moving over mine so passionately I can barely catch my breath, but I don’t care.

Who needs air when they have Tug Hunter?

I
t is a good thing Javier’s room is in the back of the loft and he’s sound asleep, because neither of us is quiet as our hands move all over each other. I can’t get enough of her lips, her taste—her smell.

From the office, I hear my phone ringing. I know who it is. For the last few hours, I’ve been on the phone with Tori, and I lied to Maria, which makes me a complete ass. I end the kiss and go to answer my phone because if I don’t, I’ll be thinking about Tori while I make love to Maria and that’s even worse than lying to her. Maria follows me to the office, and the guilt I already feel gets thicker as I answer my phone.

“Hey,” I say, realizing I’m winded from kissing Maria. Tori asks me to come over and I agree. I end the call and Maria studies me.

“Tori?” she guesses.

I nod. “First night alone and she’s not doing so well.” I scrub my face and decide to come clean. “I’ve been on the phone with her all night. There was no crisis at work.”

“Why’d you lie?”

“I have no fucking clue. I wasn’t ready to talk to you and she called upset. I guess I figured if I told you I was talking to her, you’d take it wrong.”

“Like you’d prefer to talk to a woman you loved most of your life, rather than settle an argument with the woman you currently share a home with. Yeah, I might have taken that wrong.”

“That’s not true and you’re not just a woman I share a home with. You’re a woman I can’t live without.”

She rolls her eyes, her slight smile conflicts with what I’m expecting.

“All right, look. This is your one free fuck-up, and only because you told me the truth. Don’t hide things from me where Tori is concerned. It isn’t good.”

“I know it isn’t. I’m sorry.”

“I have to ask you, are you completely over her?”

“Yes. She watched some Hollywood gossip show that did a piece on the band. There was my brother and a lot of women and she freaked out. I told her I’d come over because she doesn’t want to be alone.”

“Brady would never cheat on her.”

“I know this, and you know this, but the woman and her fucking hormones don’t. I’m just going to go over, wait until she crashes, and then come home.”

T
ori’s passed out when I finally arrive. I write her a quick note that I was here and check on Drew before I leave and drive back to the loft.

When I enter my bedroom, Javier is curled up in my bed with Maria sound asleep. I quietly close the door and head to the couch to sleep so I don’t wake them. I strip to my T-shirt and boxers and settle on the couch. As I try to sleep, I wonder what in the fuck I’m getting myself into with Tori, and how long Maria will be understanding?

M
aria’s warm lips press into mine as she straddles me. My hands mold to her hips. She’s only wearing underwear with her white tank-top and I groan into her mouth, feeling her smile against my lips. I shove her pelvis down onto my crotch, lifting my hips as I devour her mouth. Her hand slips under the T-shirt I slept in, her fingertips trailing lightly over my stomach and chest as she drops soft kisses along my jaw. The light and sensual moans coming from her mouth are my undoing. I have to have her and I have to have her now.

My hands dip into her underwear and I hesitate, remembering we’re on the couch and Javier could catch us.

“Tori stopped by to thank you and took him and Andrew to breakfast,” she whispers in my ear before sitting up and gazing down at me, her eyes weighted heavily with lust. I must have been out cold. I didn’t hear anything.

Her sheer tank allows me to see the outline of her nipples through the fabric. I bring her hands to her breasts, cuing her to touch them. Her delicate hands massage her breasts while I press my thumb into her clit, her arousal soaking through her underwear and wetting my skin. With a growl, I grip onto the sides of her waist and rock her over the length of my cock.

I lift my hips and push my boxers down low enough to spring my dick free. A second later, I hook a finger through the crotch of her underwear and push them to the side. Maria’s hand wraps around my shaft, aligning the tip with her opening before she sinks slowly on top of me, burying my dick deep inside of her.

“Oh, fuck, Maria,” I scream out, digging my fingertips in to her hips to keep her from moving. “You feel so fucking good!” I want to absorb this feeling, the complete connection for just a minute.

She laces our fingers together and brings our hands above our heads, joining our chests, her head just to the right of mine. My whiskers scrape against her cheek as she starts to ride me. Her movements are slow, yet powerful and the intensity is overpowering. I’m about to flip her on her back, but she knows my body well and sits up, increasing her speed and the friction. My cock pushes against the walls inside of her as she slides up and down, using her hips and the feeling is incredible.

The smile on her lips, her heavy eyelids, and her perfect breasts bouncing are a going to make me explode. Her inner thighs quiver against my legs. She’s about to come.

“Oh, God! Oh, God!” she cries out and her eyes roll back in her head as her thighs tighten around me. She stills and collapses on top of me, the muscles inside of her contracting around my dick.

“I love watching you come,” I tell her, slipping an arm around her and flipping her so I’m on top.

Her cheeks flush the shade of red I love. I shove my boxers down my legs, and tear her underwear from her body, before slowly slipping back inside of her with a loud groan. She feels so good, so right. I love this woman. Her fingers trail lightly through the stubble on my jaw.

“I’m sorry for what I said.”

“It’s over,” I say and lift my hips, slamming back into her. “I love you.”

She shows off her flexibility by lifting her legs in the air and resting her calves on my shoulders. Her confident smirk tells me something dirty is about to come from her mouth.