Turn On A Dime - Kade's Turn (32 page)

“I’m fine, Kade.” She smiled, transfixing his already mesmerized gaze. “I’ll heal. I survived.”

The thought of her injuries made the banked rage inside boil back to the surface. His hands tightened into fists before he remembered he still held her hand. He didn’t want to hurt her, so he forced himself to relax.

“He died too quick after what he did to you.”

Losing her, the reality of it, hit him hard. She wasn’t his to keep, but he’d still see her, even if she was with Blane. But he’d almost lost her permanently from his life, and he couldn’t take that. He could handle being friend-zoned, just as long as he could still talk to her, be with her in some small way. It was more than he deserved.

She opened her mouth to speak, but he suddenly didn’t want to hear what she had to say. She’d probably defend him, but she was wrong.

He pressed a finger to her lips to quiet her, which was also a bad decision.

Her lips were soft and full, the warmth of her breath fluttering against his skin as he quieted her. She stared at him, her eyes so wide and so blue, it almost hurt to look into them. Once he started touching her, he couldn’t stop. His hand moved to slip under her hair and curl around the back of her neck.

“You even look like a princess,” he murmured, thinking out loud. “White gown, blonde hair tumbling over your shoulders, blue eyes so wide and innocent. All you need is a knight in shining armor to come to you rescue.” Instead, she had him. A pitiful substitute.

“You came to my rescue, Kade.”

He grimaced. “Blane’s the white night. Not me.”

“Sometimes knights wear black.”

She was gazing at him and he was lost in her eyes. What had that meant? She thought he was like Blane? A good person? She was delusional, but he didn’t want her to stop looking at him like that, like he was her whole world, so he said nothing.

Suddenly, she winced.

“What? What’s wrong?” Had he unintentionally hurt her? But she shook her head.

“It’s nothing. Probably just time for another pain pill,” she said.

Getting up, Kade retrieved a glass of water from the bathroom, then gave her a pill from the prescription bottle on the table. Once she’d swallowed it and lay down, he had no further excuses to stay, so he rose to go.

“Wait,” she said, latching on to his sleeve and stopping him. “Where are you going? Are you going to your place?” She sounded vaguely anxious.

He nodded and could have sworn he heard her let out a long breath.

“Do you mind…I mean, if it’s not too much trouble—”

She wanted something of him, but was hesitant to ask. If she only knew there was nothing he’d deny her.

“What do you need? Are you still in pain?” he asked.

“No. I just…don’t want to be alone.” Her voice was small and slightly embarrassed. “It’s…dark,” she continued. “Just until I fall asleep. Then you can leave.”

Kade had slept for years with the closet light on and the door cracked, unable to bring himself to embrace full darkness while he slept. There were too many things that could hurt him—had hurt him—and always they found the cloak of darkness to be their best ally in an ambush. He heard the fear behind Kathleen’s request, and didn’t require further explanation.

He lay down next to her on top of the covers.

She turned toward him, scooting closer until she was nestled right up against him. He closed his eyes, memorizing the feel of her body pressed against his. She hadn’t asked Blane to guard her from the nightmares inside her head—she’d asked him. That thought burrowed inside his chest and wound its roots through his heart.

Though she was quiet, he could tell she wasn’t sleeping, not yet, and a question that hadn’t been answered came to him.

“Kathleen.”

“Yes?”

“How did you get out of that cellar?”

Her reaction was immediate, the pliant softness of her body stiffening next to his. When she spoke, it was in a horrified whisper.

“I used Brian’s body as a ladder.”

She had the same feeling in her voice that he was quite familiar with—the regret and horror of what you would do to save your own life. The will to live is strong. It takes a lot for someone to give up and accept their fate. Kathleen hadn’t buckled. Despite the hopeless circumstances, she’d done the unthinkable…because she’d had to.

She was fucking amazing.

Wrapping his arms around her, he pulled her closer to him. “Shh,” he said, smoothing her silken hair. “You did what you had to do. He wouldn’t have wanted you to die there, too.” Her body gradually relaxed again, melting into his as he held her.

“Those men didn’t deserve any of this,” she said.

“Nope,” Kade sighed. “They were just pawns. Bowers and Freeman were threatened into changing their testimony, then killed by a fanatic looking for revenge.”

“And Stacey,” she said, her voice sad, “caught up in it just because of who she loved.”

Kade wondered if it occurred to her that the same could be said of herself. She’d been a target—had nearly died—because of Blane. But Kathleen was smart and he bet she’d figured that one out on her own.

They lay there for a long while, and she seemed content to let him hold her and keep touching her hair, his fingers sliding through the long strands. Her head was against his chest, listening to his heart beating, maybe. It was soothing. Peaceful. Kade could lie for hours like this, just holding her. It didn’t matter that there were layers of fabric and blankets between them. He was sure this would be the last chance he’d get to hold her like this, and he didn’t want it to end.

The clock downstairs tolled the hour. Midnight. Her voice came softly out of the darkness.

“Merry Christmas, Kade.”

“Merry Christmas, Kathleen.”

She fell asleep soon after that, the pain medication taking effect, but Kade didn’t leave, though there were many reasons why he should. At the moment, none of them seemed important enough to propel him from the bed.

She nestled closer in her sleep and his arms instinctively tightened around her. He could smell her hair and the clean scent of her skin. Closing his eyes, he committed this moment to memory. Chances were good it would never happen again, and it was worth taking the time and effort to never forget it.

He didn’t sleep—he didn’t want to waste this time by sleeping it away—so he just lay there, staring at the ceiling and breathing in Kathleen.

It was the best gift he’d ever gotten on Christmas morning.

The sky was just beginning to lighten when he extricated himself and slid from the bed. He took one long last look at her sleeping before easing out of the room. Turning away from the closed door, he glanced down the hall. Blane was standing outside his bedroom, watching him.

Kade stiffened. Guilt rose like nausea and it felt as though Blane had caught him red-handed doing something wrong. Which he hadn’t, not really.

Unless you counted falling in love with his girl.

Blane started walking toward him so Kade met him halfway.

“What were you doing in Kat’s room?” Blane asked. His voice was modulated. Trying not to wake Kathleen, Kade guessed.

“Just checking on her,” Kade replied. He raised an eyebrow. “Nothing wrong with that, is there?”

“No, I’m just surprised. Since when have you cared about any of my girlfriends?” And edge of accusation was in his tone. Barely present, but there nonetheless.

“Kathleen’s not your girlfriend.” The possessive retort came instantly, without thought, a reaction to the jealousy that had struck him at the term
my girlfriend
.

Blane looked at him.

Kade shrugged, struggling to make it sound nonchalant when he said, “She dumped your ass, remember? And I don’t see her sleeping in your bed tonight.”

Blane’s eyes narrowed. “I’ll win her back.”

Kade gave him a thin smile. “I’m sure you will, brother.” He turned to go, anxious to put an end to what was rapidly becoming dangerously close to a confrontation.

“How long were you in there?”

Blane’s question made him pause. Kade glanced back around. Debated lying. Decided not to.

“All night.” He paused, then added. “She asked me to stay.”

Blane was an expert in controlling his reactions, but Kade knew him better than anyone, so he could read the anger and dismay those words produced.

“You call her
princess
,” he said. “Why?”

“It’s just a nickname,” Kade hedged. “You call her
Kat
.”

“That’s different. I know her.”

“Do you?” He took a step closer to Blane. “Do you really? Because it looks like you only see what you want to see.”

This time when he turned and walked away, Blane was silent.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Kade glanced in the rearview mirror and pushed his fingers through his hair. He’d slept all day before rising in time to dress for Christmas dinner and drive back to Blane’s. He was tense, his stomach in knots, and he wanted to see Kathleen.

He had to say goodbye.

No way could he stick around, that was patently obvious. He wouldn’t be able to stay away from her. And neither could he watch as Blane seduced her once again, then no doubt dumped her in a month or two once the challenge was over. He’d seen it happen too many times to want to have a front-row seat when it happened to Kathleen.

He was nearly out of the car when he hesitated, then reached back in and grabbed something from the glove box and dropped it inside the pocket of his slacks.

Mona insisted they dress for Christmas dinner, so he was wearing a black suit, but he refused to wear a tie, opting instead for a black shirt he left open at the neck. It reminded him of what Kathleen had said to him last night.

Sometimes knights wear black.

He wondered if she’d remember saying it.

He heard voices and laughter as he walked down the hall to the library. His feet wanted to move faster, hurrying him towards Kathleen, but he forced his steps to a measured pace. The anticipation made it that much sweeter when he stepped into the room and saw her.

She was easy to pick out, standing somewhat apart from everyone else. Gazing out the window with her back to him, Kade took a moment to admire her.

She wore a black velvet dress that clung to her body, accentuating the curve of her waist and flare of her hips. Her hair was a warm blonde cascade of curls and waves down her back.

He didn’t think twice, he just headed straight for her.

“Penny for your thoughts,” he said, once he was near.

She turned, her exquisite blue eyes widening in surprise, then lighting up with pleasure. She smiled and he stopped breathing for a moment. She was so beautiful, it made his chest ache to look at her.

“You’re here,” she said, sounding almost breathless.

She looked as happy to see him as he felt on the inside, but dared not let show. Still, he couldn’t help the small smirk that curved his lips.

“Stating the obvious,” he teased. “Let’s hope that bullet to your leg didn’t affect your brain.” His hungry gaze drank her in, from the pink of her lips to the deep swell of her cleavage, the black a vivid contrast to the pale ivory perfection of her skin. She held an empty martini glass between lax fingers.

“Looks like you could use another drink,” he said, using the excuse of taking her glass as an opportunity to step closer to her. He leaned down. “I know I do.”

It seemed the most natural thing in the world to take her hand in his, slotting their fingers together as he walked her to the bar set up on the sideboard. The empty sugar-encrusted glass wasn’t her style, but he guessed Mona had given it to her. Setting it aside, he took two lowball glasses and filled each with ice. Grabbing the bottle of vodka, he poured a healthy shot in each, then topped with tonic and handed her one while he took the other.

“To your continued good health,” he said, clinking his glass against hers.

Blue eyes on his, she took a sip. Kade avidly watched the way her lips formed to the glass, the movement of her throat as she swallowed, and how her tongue swiped at the damp fluid left behind.

“Glad you could make it, Kade.”

Kade had seen Blane’s approach, and he didn’t miss the way his arm slid possessively around Kathleen’s waist. Jealousy sank its claws in deep and Kade took a long swallow of his drink, fighting the insane urge to shove Blane away from her. If he kept looking in her eyes, he could control it, so he didn’t look away from the clear, pure blue.

“Wouldn’t have missed it, brother,” he said.

Vivian stepped inside their circle, giving him a hug, which he allowed. Sliding her arm through his, she chatted with him as she led him away from Blane and Kathleen.

Kade listened with half an ear, his attention focused on Kathleen as she and Blane talked quietly. She was smiling up at him in a gentle, adoring way that made Kade’s stomach churn. He tossed back the rest of his drink, then excused himself from Vivian to go pour another.

Dinner was torture. He sat down and across the table from Blane and Kathleen. Blane was at the head with Kathleen on his right. Kade drank more than he ate, emptying too many glasses of wine. But no matter how much he drank, he still felt stone cold sober, which sucked. He wanted not to care that Blane whispered in her ear, making her smile. Or that he kept touching her—her hand, her arm, the back of her neck underneath her hair.

He poured himself another glass of wine.

It felt like the night was never going to end and Kade glanced at his watch for the umpteenth time as he followed everyone to the family room. His earlier pleasure that Kathleen had seemed glad to see him had evaporated. She’d been polite, that was all. Blane had been right—Kathleen was nice. Of course she’d want to be on good terms with her boyfriend’s brother.

Kade poured himself an after-dinner scotch, deciding at the last second to pour one for Blane, too, especially when he heard Keaston talking to him.